Another Day in Paradise
by loveadubdub
Summary: Two kids in diapers and one in braces is seriously expensive. And whoever said kids get easier as they get older was smoking something because that's definitely not true... Sequel to You Won't Find Heart and Soul in the Stars
1. Chapter 1

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Part 1**

…

"This is the last one. No matter what."

Sam nods. Quinn's right. Four kids is enough- _more _than enough. At least for normal people anyway. He's sure that some crazy fundamentalist Christian homeschooling people think four is just a jumping off point, but for him, it's plenty.

They're in the doctor's office, waiting for the ultrasound tech to come give them the news. By this point, they're pretty familiar with the process. They've found themselves in this very room plenty of times over the past few years, but it's still hard to shake the little bit of nerves that always come with it. Everything's fine, and they've had like zero indication that there's anything to worry about it. But it's still always there.

"If it's another boy, I'm moving out." Quinn leans back against the table and lets out a little sigh. "I can't take all the testosterone."

"If you leave me alone with four kids, I will sue you."

She smiles kind of smugly. "You'll have to find me first. And I'll just leave you with three. I'll take Jake with me- he's the only one who's potty trained."

He shakes his head at her, trying to come up with a good response when the tech comes in. She's new and not one of the ones they're used to. "Hi, I'm Amy," she says happily, and she looks like she's fresh out of college. She seriously can't be more than twenty-one or twenty-two.

Quinn introduces them, and Sam just kind of stands there because there's not a whole lot to say. Amy does all the small talk stuff as she gets the machine ready. "So, are you guys hoping for a boy or a girl?"

"Either," they both say in unison, and then they look at each other and smile. Quinn's the one who explains, "Well, we already have three boys."

And it's true. They're not going to be _disappointed _with another boy, but they _want _a girl. It's the whole reason they even went for a fourth kid. He knows that sounds awful, but it's true. They had plans to stop at three, but a couple of years after Hunter was born, they decided to go for one more- just to try for a girl. So yeah, they say _either _because they don't want to sound like awful people, but they both know what they want.

"Well, let's see if we can get you a girl this time!" Amy's still smiling like she loves her job or something. Maybe she's new enough that she still does, who knows?

She gets the machine set up and then leans over to push Quinn's shirt up. She's got a little belly but not one that's super noticeable when it's covered. It's more obvious when it's exposed like this, but it's still pretty small. The tech squeezes out the gel, and Quinn makes a little face because she always hates the feel of that stuff. It only takes her like a second to relax, though, and then she's lifting one arm behind her head to give herself a better view of the monitor. It comes to life when Amy presses the wand down. A couple of seconds later, the outline of a baby shows up, and that automatic tug settles in his stomach. It actually looks like a baby now with a head and a body… But that's about all he can tell. This is his fourth child, and he still has trouble distinguishing stuff on ultrasounds.

Quinn smiles at him, and he gives her one back before they both turn their attention back to the monitor. Amy moves the wand around and plays with some buttons on the machine. A couple of minutes pass while she tries to get the right angle.

"This one is a stubborn little thing."

Sam's not surprised by this. Ethan and Hunter were both super camera shy in the womb, too, which is weird because now they're both camera hogs. He's antsy, though, and he keeps squinting at the monitor like he can really see something. He can't, of course, but he's still got his eyes trained there.

"Oh, here we go…" Amy moves the wand just a little bit further down Quinn's stomach and looks at the screen. "See these three lines?" She points to something that Sam can just barely see; Quinn, though, immediately perks up. "You're getting a little girl!"

It's hard to even believe the words, and Sam looks down at Quinn who turns her head with one of those huge giant smiles that he can't help but return. She's got one hand's fingertips against her bottom lips as she looks back at the screen, and Sam leans forward so that he can get a better look.

"You're sure?"

Amy nods and points at the monitor. "She's bent over, see? These are her legs and her butt and… one, two, three."

Sam can kind of make out what she's saying if he squints hard enough, but mostly he just has to run on trust. Still, he needs to make sure. "You're sure that couldn't be like… ball, penis, ball?"

Amy laughs, and Quinn's smile instantly turns into her _you're a dumbass _look when she glares at him. He just shrugs, though, because seriously. They need to be positive.

"I'm sure." Amy moves the wand and tries for a different view. It's not very successful, but she seems confident. "I promise you it's a girl."

A girl. They're really having a girl.

…

They tell the kids first, and the little ones show a lot of excitement based solely on the fact that they're copying their parents' excitement.

Hunter constantly wants to kiss Mommy's belly, and when prompted to, "Tell Sissy hi," he says a sweet hi and then grins hugely. Ethan asks again when the baby's coming, and they tell him for the thousandth time that she'll be here in August. Jake is less enthused than his brothers, but he seems a little interested in knowing that he's finally going to have a sister. To him, though, it's probably less of _finally having a girl _and more of _another freaking baby._

Jake's done well with the situation- at least for the most part. He was an only child for a long time, so it was kind of an adjustment when the babies started happening. But Sam could relate because the same thing kind of happened to him. He was already in third grade by the time his parents started having more kids, and it took some getting used to. So he knew what was going on in Jake's head and just let him deal with it in his own way. He really wasn't too bad at all when Ethan was born, but now it's obviously starting to get a little old.

Jake's at a super weird age, though. Sam's already decided that whoever said kids get easier as they get older was smoking crack or something because seriously? His two year old might not be able to wipe his own butt, but Sam would much rather deal with Hunter all day than deal with Jake for five minutes when he's in one of his moods. The problem, though, is that knowing when those moods are gonna happen is like impossible. He can be the sweetest kid ever, and then five seconds later, he might as well be auditioning for The Omen: The Tween Years because _lord. _His attitude is ridiculous.

And thinking that he'd be able to bypass all the snotty preteen tones because his kid doesn't actually _talk? _Yeah… Dumbest assumption Sam ever made. He might not get the actual _tone, _but the overload of eye rolling and general looks of disdain make up for it in spades.

Yeah, it's fun…

…

He loves his family. More than anything. Quinn and his boys, yeah, they're basically awesome.

What he doesn't love is barely being able to afford them.

It's not like he does it alone or anything because Quinn works a ton and makes pretty decent money. Well, she makes more than him anyway. It's not something that particularly bothers him or whatever, not like he might have thought it would at some point. It actually kind of blows because she has like a billion dollars worth of education and isn't making anywhere close to the money she should with those kinds of degrees, but she still does okay. He does okay, too, and it's not like they're _poor _(he's been poor, he knows the difference), but they don't have a ton of extra money or anything. Sometimes it's hard to even make ends meet.

He tries not to think about it a ton because money isn't really important to him. Yeah, it's important to _have, _but he learned a really long time ago that there are things that matter a lot more. But still, it's not like he can just _ignore _it because like it or not, bills have to be paid, and there has to be enough money to cover those.

So that was one of the main concerns when they decided to get pregnant again- would they be able to _afford _another baby? Kids are expensive. A hell of a lot more expensive than he ever would have imagined, that's for sure. He's got two (soon to be three) in diapers and another one in braces (it's freaking _ridiculous _how expensive teeth are). That's just the start of it, though. They're lucky that his mom watches the babies for free, but Jake's school, God, is seriously the single biggest expense they have. It's more expensive than their _house payment. _It's always been expensive, but getting married changed a lot of things on their taxes and meant they no longer qualified for any kind of financial aid. It's not like they have any choice, though. There is exactly _one _deaf school in Cincinnati and only two in the entire state. And Jake's _profoundly deaf, _so it's not like they can just mainstream him into the closest public school and expect him to be alright. Even with interpreters and special accommodations, there's just no way he would be able to even keep up, much less learn anything new. Plus, Sam's just not willing to set him up for that. Yeah, maybe that's not great, but Jake's already at a point where he's becoming super self-conscious about everything, including his deafness, so it's just not worth it to put him in a position where that very thing is going to be spotlighted and exposed to a bunch of brand new asshole sixth graders.

So they just make it work.

They buy store-brand food. They don't have any extra movie channels on their cable bill. They have strict rules about turning lights off when they're not in use, and they seriously, seriously don't spoil their kids. They just cut corners wherever they can and somehow make the money stretch enough to cover the bills. It's annoying, yeah, having to constantly think about money and adding up numbers and bills trying to make everything equal out, but they get by.

It's scary, though, because he's already seen firsthand what happens when there's more bills than money, and it's not something he particularly wants to live through again. More than anything, he never wants his _kids _to go through it. It's hard to put a lot into savings, though, which he doesn't really like. It's going to be even harder now with another baby, but they'll just have to make it work.

That doesn't mean he doesn't worry, though…

…

His last client cancels, so he gets to leave work a couple of hours earlier than he planned.

His mom's at home with Ethan and Hunter, and he can hear them in the backyard the second he gets out of his car. He doesn't bother going inside, just walks around the side of the house to find them. His mom's flipping through a magazine, and the boys are running around chasing each other. They both practically tackle him the second they notice his arrival, though, but he catches them before they have a chance to actually knock him over or something. They get bored like three seconds later, of course, and go back to whatever random game of chase they're playing, and he sits down in the chair beside his mother.

"You're home early."

"Yeah, my last guy canceled. He said he had to take his dog to the vet or something."

"So you're off for the rest of the day?"

He nods and squints up at the sun. It's too hot for March, but the weather's been so bipolar lately that you can't predict one day to the next whether you'll need shorts or a coat and gloves. It's ridiculous, but at least the kids can play outside without freezing to death… This week anyway.

"At least you get a little break."

A little break, yeah. That's cool, but if he doesn't work, he doesn't get paid. That's less cool. "How were the kids?"

"Ethan's been in time out twice already."

"Why?" He wishes he could say he's surprised, but he's not. Ethan _stays _in trouble- no matter who's in charge.

"Same as always. Won't listen, won't follow directions…"

Sam frowns, but it's not like he's shocked. That's just Ethan. It's like it's impossible to get anything through to him. It doesn't matter how many times he goes to time out, he comes out and does the exact same thing an hour later. It's frustrating because it's almost like he doesn't even _care. _Quinn says it's middle child syndrome. His mom says Terrible Threes are the new Terrible Twos (Sam's more likely to believe Terrible _Twelves _are the new Terrible Twos, but that's a whole different story). It doesn't matter what's causing it, though- Ethan's just hardheaded and doesn't listen to anyone.

His mom kisses the boys goodbye and leaves them with Sam in the backyard. He's still in gym clothes, so he doesn't mind running around with them. The more energy they get rid of now, the easier it'll be to put them to bed later. Plus, it's a really nice day, and he likes being outside with his kids. He has to practically drag them inside for a shower before they have to leave and pick Jake up.

Quinn's voice rings in his head while he drives to the school, and he talks as much as possible to keep the kids awake because they have a tendency to fall asleep in the car. If they nap now, tiring them out will have been pointless because they'll _never _go to sleep later, and Quinn will be pissed at him. Ethan tells him some long, crazy story about a tiger (he's _obsessed _with animals and makes up "real" stories about them all the time), and Hunter kicks the back of the seat repeatedly and throws Goldfish into the floorboard one at a time.

The line of cars at school is down to the street, but it doesn't take that long to get to the middle school pickup. Jake spots them right away and says a quick goodbye to one of his friends before running to the car and sliding into the front seat. He must be in a good mood or something because he immediately reaches into his backpack and pulls out two strawberry suckers he obviously got from somewhere in school and passes them back to his brothers. Quinn's not going to be happy about the kids eating candy so close to dinner, either, but maybe no one will tell her.

Ethan shoves the sucker into his mouth and immediately starts telling Jake a story, this one about a rabbit. Jake is patient with him, paying attention and answering back a few times. Ethan and Hunter can both sign and have been doing it since they were babies- they could literally both sign before they could speak- so it's easy for him to get his story across. And Jake's nice enough to pretend to be interested. All three kids are being exceptionally good.

It's a little bit scary, to be honest. Not to mention suspicious.

…

The reason for so much good behavior comes out later that night.

The kids are being unusually calm and well behaved, and they're actually all getting along for the most part, which is sort of a rarity. Ethan and Hunter both tend to feed off of Jake more often than not, so when Jake is being nice and attentive, the little ones kind of just mellow out and copy him. So there's Sam thinking it's actually pretty cool that his kids are all playing together and getting along and thinking how awesome it is that Jake's paying attention to them and not telling them to leave him alone and complaining about how much they're annoying him. Those kinds of nights happen way more often than _these _kinds of nights.

But then it's bedtime for the babies and homework time for Jake, so Sam takes Ethan and Hunter to bed, and Quinn sticks around in the living room to help Jake. She's on her laptop working from home (something she's been doing more and more lately), but she's still right there if Jake needs something.

Bedtime rituals are pretty much always the same. Brushing teeth, trying to potty (both refuse- big shock), pajamas, and usually a book or something unless the kids are just too tired and fall asleep. The schedule's not as strict as the one he used to have Jake on, and bedtime is basically just whenever the kids are starting to droop. It was different when Jake was little- he was in school from the time he was two years old, so a strict schedule was important. Plus, Jake's a nightmare when he doesn't get enough sleep. He's gotten a little better as he's gotten older, but he's still the hardest person in the world to get up in the morning, and if he's short on sleep, he's still going to be a world-class brat.

They moved Hunter into Ethan's room about a month ago to make room for a nursery transformation, but the room's not really big enough for two side-by-side twins. They bought bunk-beds, but there's no way it's safe enough for either of the boys to sleep on top yet. So the ladder is dismantled, and both kids sleep on the bottom bed. They fit there just fine, but it _does _make getting them to actually sleep a little more difficult because they either spend too much time laughing and talking or they find something to fight over. Tonight's relatively easy, though- playing outside definitely helped tire them out, and they've basically been going non-stop since dinner. So after one short book, all Sam has to say is, "Sleep time," and they both settle right down. These are _definitely _the best kinds of nights.

When he gets back to the living room, Jake's on the floor with his homework spread out over the coffee table. Quinn's behind him on the sofa reading something from a piece of paper with a frown on her face.

"Why are you just now showing this?"

Jake signs that he forgot, and Quinn gives him a look that clearly says she doesn't believe him.

"What is it?" Sam sits down beside Quinn, and Jake glances at him and then turns back to his homework. Quinn hands him the paper, which is a note from the school requesting a conference. It's actually from the main office, not even just from his teacher. There's definitely a reason why he waited until almost bedtime to hand it over, and there's definitely a reason he gave it to Quinn. He does that a lot, goes to Quinn when he thinks he's gonna be in trouble. He also likes to play them against each other- something he's been doing pretty regularly since he first figured it out years ago. To say it's annoying would be a serious understatement.

He kicks Jake to get his attention and asks what the note's about. Jake does his best innocent act and just shrugs and says he doesn't know. It's pretty obviously a lie, but he doesn't have any proof. It still irks him, though, but he's not going to lose his temper over something he doesn't even know yet. So he just gives Jake a look and tells him to finish his homework.

Quinn just shrugs when he holds the note up to her in question. Yeah, this should be fun.

…

Mornings are _insane. _

There's the usual morning BS of just waking everybody up. The babies aren't actually that difficult to get up, but diaper changes and all that other crap take forever. He seriously doesn't know why neither one of them will go near the toilet. If Ethan isn't potty-trained by the time the new baby gets here, he's probably gonna literally lose his mind because three kids in diapers is just insane. But it's like he's scared or something, like if he actually uses the potty it might swallow him whole or something. He'll barely even sit on it, and when he does, nothing happens. He'll go in his pull-up three minutes after you let him up, though. It's crazy. He's three and a half- Jake was going by himself when he was _two, _so he knows it's not normal.

He's got an early client, so he gets the babies changed and puts them in front of the TV while he gets dressed. Quinn's hogging the bathroom and barely gives him enough room to brush his teeth, but he's used to that. She finally finishes doing her makeup and lets him have the bathroom all to himself while she goes to take care of the kids. He's just freaking thankful that she seems to be over the morning sickness because while it wasn't so bad with Ethan and Hunter, it's been a nightmare with this one. Everyone told her that's how they knew she was having a girl, but Quinn said she was more likely to believe she was having a demon. Luckily most of that seems to be over…

He finishes up and grabs his gym bag to head to the kitchen. Hunter's crying about something, and Ethan's tailing Quinn all over the kitchen telling her how hungry he is. Jake is literally asleep at the table, and his uniform's a mess and not at all put together. His shirt's untucked, one half of his collar is up, he has no belt, socks, or shoes, and it's very obvious that he hasn't bothered to brush his hair. So basically, a typical morning.

"Your mom just called me," Quinn's interrupted once again by Ethan saying he's hungry, and it's not surprising at all when she finally snaps, "_Ethan! _Go sit down," in her mom voice. It's also not surprising when Ethan joins Hunter in his crying when he finally goes to the table. Quinn rolls her eyes and looks like she's close to losing it. "Your mom called," she says again, ignoring the crying kids at the table. "She said the interstate is completely blocked off."

"Is she still coming?"

"Yeah, but it'll probably take her an hour and a half to get here with all the traffic!" She almost looks like she's about to burst into tears, which is entirely possible given the fact that she's a super emotional pregnant woman. He's not really sure what the best reaction is, but she apparently thinks he's an idiot for not answering right away. "I have a meeting this morning I can't miss!"

He has a client he can't miss, too. And his is earlier. But still, he's not dumb enough to say this. "I guess I can take them with me…" There's a daycare at the gym, and he's not actually supposed to bring his kids to it, but he'll just tell them it's an emergency if he gets questioned. Hopefully he won't get fired or anything. "Can you still take Jake to school?"

She nods, obviously in a better mood, and grabs two waffles from the toaster where they've been waiting. She hands one to Ethan and one to Jake (dry waffles only- syrup and those kids is a waiting disaster of zombie apocalypse proportions), and then she grabs a bowl and pours some cereal into it for Jake. Sam wakes him up again and gets a mean glare in response, but Jake does finally sit up when he's got breakfast. Everything goes pretty okay until Ethan starts whining that he wants cereal, too, and throws a half-eaten waffle at Quinn.

Yeah, this should be an awesome day.

…

Weekends should be relaxing, right? That's what they're there for?

Yeah, maybe in normal households. Not in this one… For one thing, Quinn works every Saturday, and Sam has to work, too, more often than not. On top of that, it's baseball season, and that takes up a huge part of the day on its own. It's worth it, yeah, because he's got a great team, and he gets to see his kid (who is awesome, by the way) play. But sometimes it's super tiring, especially if he has to work early in the morning and coach in the afternoon. Sundays aren't much better because they have to get up early and go to Kentucky for church. Then they have to go to his parents' house and stick around there most of the day. Yeah, he likes being around his parents, and his mom always cooks a really awesome meal, but sometimes it'd be nice to just relax at home and do nothing.

He's got a feeling that's never gonna happen.

…

On Wednesday, they have to go to Jake's school for the conference.

Sam tells Quinn she doesn't have to come if she's too tired or whatever, but she says she's fine, so they leave the kids with his mom for a couple of extra hours and go to the principal's office. The principal is this lady named Mrs. Marsden who's been in charge of the school for as long as Jake's been a student. Sam's met her plenty of times before because it's a small school, and all the faculty and parents are on a pretty well-known basis. Still, she's intimidating because she's extremely stern and straight-laced, and he's really honestly not sure he's ever seen her smile in the past ten years or so that he's been coming to this school.

She invites them into the office and offers them seats across from her desk. One of Jake's teachers is in the office as well, and she smiles at them. Ms. Culmner is one of the school's newer teachers, and she's only been there for two years, but so far, she's been one of the nicest teachers Jake's ever had. She's completely deaf and double-teams with a hearing teacher, and sixth grade has actually been one of the better teaching teams they've been through.

Mrs. Marsden does her whole serious thing and thanks them for coming. She asks if they want an interpreter for Ms. Culmner, but they decline because they've never had any problem communicating with her before. Mrs. Marsden nods and then gets right to it.

"Jake's been having some issues in the classroom."

It's not like Sam didn't know it was coming, but it still doesn't make it any easier to hear. He tries not to let it show, though, and just says, "Like what?"

"Well, for one thing, he doesn't seem to have any interest in actually succeeding academically."

Now that _is _a surprise. Jake's never been the world's greatest student, but he's always managed decent grades. He's smart, and he tries. He's never really had any problems in that aspect.

Mrs. Marsden pulls out a folder and flips it to a printout of class grades. Jake's homework column has a massive amount of blank spots.

"You can see that he's consistently missing homework assignments. He's just not doing them."

"But Jake does homework every night." Quinn sounds just as confused as Sam feels, and he glances over to see that she's studying the grades with narrowed eyebrows.

"How much time does he spend on average?"

"Maybe forty-five minutes? An hour?" Quinn looks up, and she doesn't seem any less confused.

"He's in sixth grade," Mrs. Marsden says it like they don't know. "At this age, the students consistently have two hours or more of homework every night. Jake's just not doing his."

Ms. Culmner interrupts then and tells them that Jake's lack of homework is also affecting his other grades. She points out low scores on several tests. She says he's smart but that he's not making any effort, and it seriously seems like she's right.

"But Jake's never had any issues like this before." Sam's not trying to defend Jake or anything, but he's just trying to understand what's going on. "His grades have always been fine."

"I know," Mrs. Marsden nods. "That's precisely why I'm concerned. Something is obviously going on, but we cannot allow Jake to move on to seventh grade if he can't improve his grades."

"You're going to _fail _him?"

"We won't have any choice. If he doesn't have the test scores to move onto the next grade, we can't allow it. It wouldn't be fair to anyone."

"He'll have the grades." Sam's serious, too. Jake's grades are going to take a major curve upward. "I'll make sure of it."

Mrs. Marsden nods again, and he can't really tell whether she believes him or whether she's just humoring him. "On top of the grades issue, he's also having some behavioral issues."

Ms. Culmner takes over, and it's really obvious that she's trying to sugarcoat things. She tells them that Jake sometimes has problems listening and following directions and that his disinterest in his schoolwork is bleeding over into his classroom behavior.

"He's disruptive," Mrs. Marsden simplifies. "He refuses to pay attention, and in a class that small, when one child is fidgeting and looking everywhere else in the room but at his teacher, it causes the other children to become distracted as well. His teachers try to correct his behavior, but he ignores them. He's been in my office three times this month."

"Why are we just now hearing about this?" Sam's honestly confused because yeah, Jake's been in trouble a few times, but he's never had any consistent issues with his in-school behavior. He's always gotten overall good reports from his teachers, so all of this is a little shocking.

"It's a relatively new development." Mrs. Marsden once again points to the grade sheet. "You can see where his grades started falling, just a couple of months ago. The behavioral issues are fairly new as well, but we'd like to put an end to them before they escalate."

"He'll stop." Sam looks up and shakes his head a little bit. "I'll… He'll stop. I'm sorry." He glances over at Quinn, and she's looking at him with the same sort of shocked face.

Mrs. Marsden just sighs a little. "He's a child. They make less than perfect decisions sometimes. Our main concern is getting him back on the right track so that he can gain the most benefit from his education."

Sam nods. "We'll take care of it." He has no idea _how _they'll take care of it, but he's pretty sure that's not the right response right now.

They leave a little while later, after Ms. Culmner says she'll start sending him a daily list of Jake's full homework assignments and after Mrs. Marsden tells them that they will be informed of any and all behavioral issues until the problem is under control. Sam's confusion has turned into embarrassment by the time they finally leave, and when they make it to the car, the embarrassment has turned to anger.

"What is _wrong _with him?"

Quinn's looking through a copy of the folder they received, and she shakes her head. "I don't know. It seems so out of nowhere."

He's in that mood where traffic is really pissing him off, so when he turns onto the main road, he digs his fingers into the steering wheel. "I don't even know what to _do!"_

"Well, you can't lose your temper."

He rolls his eyes because seriously? "He's _failing _sixth grade. He's been to the principal's office _three times _in a month!"

"And there's obviously a reason," Quinn says calmly. "We need to find out what that reason is."

"So we should just ignore it?" Quinn has a history of playing Good Cop when it comes to Jake (funny, because she's definitely Bad Cop when it comes to the babies), but even she can't seriously be suggesting that they just do nothing and let him get away with it.

"No, of course not." Well, at least there's a little bit of reasoning there. "But you need to calm down first."

She's right. Obviously. But still, he's so _mad. _Like he seriously works his ass off to send his kid to that school, and Jake just wants to _waste _it? It's honestly infuriating because Jake's too old for this. He's way old enough to know better.

Yeah, for real. Whoever said kids get easier as they get older was _definitely _smoking something.

…

A/N: So…. Sequel!


	2. Chapter 2

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Part 2**

…

Jake's definitely mad and doing his best job at the silent treatment.

It's kind of even more annoying than it would be in a normal situation, mostly because Jake's version takes a lot more effort, and when he refuses to look at or acknowledge someone, it's not just like he's refusing to respond- he's actually completely _ignoring _them. It's not like you can just talk at the back of his head and know he's still hearing it even if he refuses to reply. He's not hearing it- he's completely removing himself from the conversation. That move has always been the one thing Jake does that pisses Sam off most.

Having kids is hard. Having a kid who can _literally _tune you out is frustrating as crap. Sam's gotten pretty used to it, obviously- he's been dealing with it for twelve years now. But that doesn't mean it's any less annoying. Jake is a good kid most of the time, but when he decides to be a brat, he can definitely pull it off. Everyone tells him that it's just normal kid stuff, and it probably is, but Sam doesn't remember ever acting like that when _he _was a kid. Maybe his parents have different memories, but he seriously doesn't think he ever did. At least not often. His parents were super strict, though, like way stricter than he is, so he knew better than to act like a crazy fool and think he was going to get away with it. But it's hard with Jake because sometimes he honestly doesn't understand _why _something is wrong or even know when he's _doing_ something wrong. It was especially hard to communicate the concept of right and wrong when he was little, but now he's not little. And he definitely knows what he's doing by acting like this and is doing it just because he can. Hearing that stuff from the school was a major wake-up call, and Sam was serious when he said things would improve. He feels like part of it's _his _fault for not even knowing what was going on, but Quinn says they shouldn't feel guilty because there was no way they would know. After all, Jake was still doing homework nightly, and they were checking it over- they had no way of knowing that he was only doing a portion of it. Still, Sam feels like he should be on top of it and feels like he must have been slacking for it to even happen in the first place. But there's no way he's going to let it continue because there's no way Jake is going to fail sixth grade. That's just not an option.

So Jake's basically lost everything.

Anything he likes is gone, and he's only getting it back when his grades start improving. And he's losing it again the second they drop or he starts getting bad behavioral reports. Jake, of course, protested all of this, tried about a million different excuses, and when they refused to listen to them, he said they were mean and unfair and basically turned on the total ignore switch. To be honest, Sam feels a little bit guilty because it _is _kind of harsh, but he honestly doesn't know what else to do. Jake _knows _better than to do this in the first place, and Sam has to get his point across one way or another- slacking off in school is _not _acceptable.

Jake, of course, takes the loss of video games and his laptop as excuse to turn evil. He ignores Sam, he ignores Quinn, and he's extra mean to his brothers. To be honest, nobody's really surprised.

It does make not strangling him kinda difficult, though.

…

He loves Thursdays because Quinn gets off early and comes to the gym with him.

They've been working out a few times a week the whole time they've been together, and it's super important now because it's basically one of the few opportunities they get to actually be alone without kids screaming in their ears or slamming doors. They never got to have it where it was just them by themselves, but even when it was just them and Jake, they still managed to have actual conversations with each other. Now, though, he feels like he spends ninety percent of his time talking to toddlers, so it's nice to actually get to talk to his wife once in awhile without a thousand distractions.

Obviously Quinn can't do a full workout because she's five months pregnant, but there's lots of lower intensity stuff that she can do. It's good for her to stay active, and Sam's right there in case she needs him or something. So it's fine. And it's not like he's going to let her do anything that might hurt her or the baby, but working out is healthy, and that's something they really try to be in their house. Sometimes it's kind of hard because none of their kids are the best eaters. Jake is like the pickiest eater on earth and basically only likes cheese and bacon and cereal and carrots. He'll _eat _other stuff, but he usually won't get past five or six bites. Getting him to clean his plate is seriously like a miracle every time it occurs. Ethan and Hunter aren't that picky, but they'd both rather wear their food than eat it. And Ethan is kind of lactose intolerant, so they have to be careful with the dairy they give him, so it's all kind of a pain when trying to keep the kids on a semi-healthy diet.

They stop the workout when Quinn gets tired, but they stick around to just hang out for a little while because they both know they've got nothing but dirty diapers and preteen attitude to look forward to when they go home. It's kind of ridiculous, though, that while they get so little time alone together without the kids, they still can't seem to find anything to talk about _besides _the kids.

Today it's Jake, which isn't surprising because he's the one with the most focus lately. It's been a week since the conference at school, and while they haven't had anymore negative reports, Jake's still half-assing his homework. He's at least _doing _it all now, but he's not putting a lot of effort into it. He knows he's not getting his video games back until he gets his grades up, so it shouldn't take long for him to realize that putting little to no effort into his work isn't going to help his situation. Unfortunately, he'd probably rather stay punished than give in and change his behavior.

"A lot of it's just puberty." Quinn sounds resigned to this, and yeah, it's probably true, but still.

"That's not an excuse to be a little shithead."

"Sam!" And okay, maybe he shouldn't call his kid a shithead, but if the shoe fits… Quinn doesn't seem amused, though. "He's going through a lot. You need to talk to him about."

"About _puberty?" _Quinn just looks at him, so obviously that's a yes. But… "He's not even there yet."

And it's true. Yeah, he's twelve, but he looks closer to ten. He's still little, the smallest kid in his class even besides one girl. He's always been short, and he's skinny, too – (probably because he doesn't _eat). _

"He will be," and Quinn sounds super serious. "And half his class already is."

There are nine people in Jake's class, so saying half of them are doing anything isn't all that impressive. But whatever.

"Can't we just wait til he asks?"

"He's never going to ask," and Quinn actually rolls her eyes. "He'd probably rather kill himself."

"So why put him through that torture?"

"Because he _needs _to know. Would you rather him get his information from his friends or from you?"

Sam can't really tell if that's a trick question because… "I'm pretty sure _Jake _would rather get his information from his friends."

"Right. So you'd rather a bunch of sixth graders teach your son about sex? That sounds like a good idea."

"Whoa, _what?" _He shakes his head because nobody said anything about _sex. _"He's twelve."

Quinn gives him this look like that's the point or something. He doesn't get it, though, because what? Jake's _twelve. _"He'll be a teenager next year."

Sam shakes his head. "So? He's still just a kid."

"You realize I was fifteen when I got pregnant, right?"

He frowns and lets out a defeated sigh- one: because he doesn't want to think about that, and two: because she's a little bit right. But still. "Jake already knows about sex." And it's true. It's kind of inevitable, given that this is the third pregnancy in a row he's been exposed to. He knows how babies get in and how they get out. That's enough for right now.

Quinn obviously doesn't agree.

"He's going to find out things one way or another. At least you could make sure he's getting the right information."

"I don't even know what to _say!" _And it's true because all this, it's just weird. It's not something he wants to think about because he'd prefer it if his kids just stayed little forever to be totally honest.

"Just be honest." Quinn shrugs like it's no big deal, and he's really tempted to tell her that if it's so damn easy then maybe she should just do it herself. "I mean, what did your dad tell you?"

"He didn't." And that's the honest truth. "He told me not to have sex because I'd end up with a baby I couldn't afford. And guess what, I had sex and ended up with a baby I couldn't afford."

He'd laugh if it wasn't so true. And kind of not funny at all. He didn't have a baby _immediately _after having sex, but it wasn't long. He was one of those people who made it all the way through high school as a virgin, but it wasn't for a lack of trying. He only really dated three girls in high school, and two of them were super religious and the other was a closet lesbian. So… yeah. It wasn't like he set out to find girls who weren't interested in having sex, but that's kind of just the way it happened. But he found a girl in college. And they had sex. And six months later she was pregnant. And then he was nineteen and having a baby. So… yeah.

"Exactly." Quinn's staring at him, and he can tell he's missing whatever point she's trying to make. He does that kind of a lot, and sometimes she's less than nice about it. "Both of us have a history of being uneducated and making really stupid mistakes. It's our responsibility to make sure our kids don't do the same thing."

He doesn't really like referring to his son as a "mistake," but he gets the message. And Quinn's right. Obviously. But still. Jake's just a _baby. _Or maybe not a _baby, _but he's still little. And all this is too weird to think about right now.

"Fine," he says it mostly just to get the subject dropped. "You wanna go to Target or something before we go home?"

Quinn giggles a little bit, and he asks her what's so funny.

"This is what our life has become? A Target trip is the closest thing we can get to a date?"

He shrugs and holds out a hand to pull her into a standing position. She takes it, and he tugs her up but doesn't let go of her hand. "You'd rather go home to Ethan's after-dinner poop?"

Quinn smiles but shakes her head. "No. Maybe if we stay gone long enough, Hunter'll go, too, and your mom can handle both of them."

"See? _This _is why you're the smart one."

He tugs her toward the changing rooms and pulls on her ponytail a little bit just because he can.

…

He doesn't have "the talk" with Jake, mostly because that would involve Jake actually speaking to him or at least listening to him.

He's doing neither.

He's still being a sulky twelve year old, and Sam's honestly kind of glad because at least he has a valid excuse as to why he hasn't had the ordered puberty talk yet. Quinn can't bitch at him because she knows how Jake's being. He's spending most of his time in his room ignoring the rest of the family, and even when they force him to come out and eat, he just sits at the table and picks at his food until the meal's over.

Whatever, at least he's not failing anymore.

Sundays are always hectic in the mornings trying to get all the kids ready for church. At least during the week they don't really have to do much about getting the babies ready because they don't actually go anywhere- Jake's the only one who has to actually get dressed and look presentable. But on Sundays, all three kids have to be dressed and groomed and ready to go, so yeah, it makes things a little difficult.

Church is kind of uneventful, which is nice. Jake behaves and doesn't act like the spawn of any demon, so that's good. Honestly, Sam's always felt kind of bad about bringing him to this church because it's not really "deaf-friendly," meaning Jake's the only deaf person at all if you don't count the hundred year old ladies who sit in the front with their hearing aids turned up full blast. Jake's a good lip reader, and he can keep up with non-signed conversations most of the time. But sitting there trying to keep up with an actual sermon is obviously too much to ask, so he doesn't really get much out of church. He gets a little bit more out of Sunday School, just because it's a smaller setting and not as monotonous, but it still sucks for him. There are other churches, a few actually, that are really adapted for deaf and hard of hearing people, and Sam's thought about taking him to one of those a lot of the years, but this is his family's church. They started going here when they first moved to Kentucky, and Stacy and Stevie basically grew up in this church. Sam likes it here- it's always been really comfortable for him, so he's never actually gone through with the whole switching to a deaf church thing, and yeah, he feels guilty about it sometimes. At least Jake's in a Catholic school, which yeah, they're not Catholic, but at least it's something, so Sam's thankful for that. Religion is important to him, like it's important that his kids be raised in church and that they say prayers at night and know about God and Jesus and the Bible and all that stuff. It's always been something that's really important to him- it's never been something he was ashamed of or afraid to admit, and he doesn't want his kids to be, either.

But he _does_ worry about Jake not getting enough out of it…

After church, they always go to his parents' house, and occasionally his sister or brother will be there, too. It doesn't happen a lot because they both live in different parts of Kentucky now, but sometimes they'll come home for a weekend or a few days. It's just his mom and dad today, though, which is fine because that's what they're used to.

No lie, his parents literally saved his life when Jake was a baby, and they still do way more than they have to. They don't _have _to do _anything, _but they're seriously the best parents in the world. He was never one of those kids who had major resentment issues with his parents, and he's always known they were really amazing, but now he sees it all in like its entirety or something. And yeah, they're awesome. For real, the best.

It's also worth noting that Jake isn't holding the same grudge toward his grandparents that he's holding toward Sam and Quinn. Really, Jake's _always _been kind of a Nana's boy. It's not surprising really because Sam moved back in with his parents when Jake was a baby, and they lived there til he was like four. So his mom was around _a lot _when Jake was little, and she always kind of babied him and catered to him a lot. She's always been the one Jake wanted when he was hurt or sick or in trouble or something, so it's not surprising that she's still the only one he lets kiss him in public. He doesn't actually sit on anyone's lap anymore, but he'll still cuddle up with her and lean against her and lay down in her lap if he's tired.

She always fixes a big meal after church, and Jake stays super hugged up on her the whole time she's cooking. She lets him, and to be honest, it kind of bothers Sam a little bit because she knows all about the school conference and knows that he's basically been really disrespectful and had a bad attitude ever since. On the other hand, he's also kind of glad that Jake's not _totally _repressed into the sullen, angry teen thing yet and that he's at least still open to _somebody._

Ethan and Hunter are running all over the place, and Sam can tell they're starting to annoy his dad, so he tries to get them to calm down. It doesn't really work, so Quinn finally just grabs them and takes them outside to play in the yard for a little bit while lunch is cooking. It's just Sam and his dad in the living room, and it's like his dad can read his mind or something because he immediately asks what's wrong.

"Nothing. Just…" He shrugs a little bit. "Jake's just being a pain. I don't know what to do with him."

And his dad actually laughs even though there's nothing particularly funny… At least nothing Sam can see anyway. "Oh, you don't know what to do with a bratty, back talking twelve year old? Big shocker."

Sam's not really sure where this is going, but… "He'd have to actually be speaking to me to back talk. He'd rather just ignore me."

"Let me guess. He keeps slamming the door to his room and staying in there until somebody has to literally drag him out?"

"Yeah, exactly." His dad just laughs again. "What is so funny?"

"He's _twelve. _That's how they act. Get used to it because it lasts for about six more years."

Sam's pretty sure this is all going to come down to some kind of karma, but… "I didn't act like that."

His dad gives him this look, and then kind of shrugs a second later. "Yeah, you were honestly the good one." Sam's shocked really because yeah, he doesn't remember acting like that, but it's still weird that his dad admits it. "You were actually a really good kid. Your brother and sister were a little more difficult… Well, Stacy's a girl, so that's a given. But think about your brother when _he _was twelve."

Sam tries. Like he really tries to picture Stevie at twelve years old, but it's kind of hard. Stevie was twelve when Jake was born, and to be perfectly honest, Sam really wasn't paying much attention to his brother when he was trying to get over his girlfriend dying and trying to figure out how he was going to raise a baby by himself. So even though they were in the same house, his little brother wasn't exactly high on his list of priorities.

"He was insane," his dad can obviously tell that he's having trouble conjuring up the image. "Smart mouth, closed off… It's just hormones."

Hormones. Again. Wonderful. Puberty. Yeah, yeah.

"But how do I make it _stop?"_

"You wait for college."

This is not the answer Sam's looking for, and it must be pretty evident on his face because his dad actually laughs. Again, nothing's really that damn funny. "Maybe I'm not strict enough." Maybe it's the truth. _He _never acted like that because he knew better. He was scared of his parents. Jake's not scared of him.

His dad, though, seems to think otherwise. He shakes his head. "You're fine. If a kid's wired to go crazy during puberty, they're gonna go crazy. If they're wired to be halfway normal, they'll be halfway normal. You can't control it."

"I want to strangle him."

"Don't. You'll go to jail. And I don't really think you're cut out for that."

Sam cracks a smile and rolls his eyes. But yeah, his parents are kind of awesome.

…

He loves coaching Little League, like for real honestly loves it.

He gave up on coaching soccer a few years ago, but Jake gave up on playing it anyway. He liked it, but it was never something he _loved. _Sam quit coaching when Ethan was born, just because there wasn't much extra time for too much of anything. Jake could have kept playing, though, but he decided he'd rather just drop it, and that was fine, too. So now they're strictly a baseball house, and that's more than okay.

The thing about Jake is that he's really, _really _good. Yeah, maybe Sam's a little bit biased, but it's the truth. He's one of the best kids in the whole league and definitely the star of their team, and he just keeps getting better all the time. He's a good hitter, a good runner, he plays shortstop and rocks at that… He's just a really, really good player.

Sam's glad that Jake puts his grudge holding on temporary hold for practice because, to be perfectly honest, he misses the hell out of his kid. This is one of his favorite parts of the week because it's the only time when it's just him and Jake. Yeah, he loves his whole family like crazy, but there's a tiny part of him that kind of misses how it was when it was just him and Jake against the world. It was just the two of them for a long time, and it's nice to still have something that's just for them. Sure, there are like fifteen other kids around, but it's still Sam and Jake away from the rest of the family. And yeah, this is what he misses.

Jake's being totally normal at practice, and all signs of his attitude from the past couple of weeks are completely gone. He's listening and paying attention, and he's actually in a really good mood. So it's obviously a nice change, and Sam easily takes advantage of it and takes them to Sonic after practice just for a little time to talk. It's not like he's even going close to the kind of talk Quinn wants him to be having (so not the time), but it's been awhile since he's gotten basically _anything _out of his son, so it's nice to just have any kind of conversation with him to be honest.

He asks how school's going, and Jake gives all the generic shrugged off responses that Sam expects. "Are you doing better?" He gets a nod and a subject change when Jake starts deciding what junk food he wants off the menu. It's kind of annoying, yeah, but Jake's a kid- it's not like his attention span is all that great on a _good _day.

They talk some more while they're waiting on their food. It's mostly just stupid stuff that's not really important. Jake tells him about two kids getting in a fight at school, and then they talk about baseball a little bit. There's nothing groundbreaking or anything, but at least it's _something. _And Jake's acting mostly normal, so that's definitely a good thing. He even gets a few smiles out of him.

And it's definitely nice to see those teeth he's paying a crap ton to have straightened.

…

He misses a doctor's appointment, and he feels like shit.

It's not the first one he's missed. It's not even the first one he's missed this pregnancy. But it still sucks. He hates missing them because it's important, you know? That's his daughter, and he wants to know how she's growing and developing, and he knows Quinn likes him to be there, too. But he has to work because his kids have to eat… So, yeah.

She sends him a text when she's finished and tells him that everything looks good, and he reads it during a water break. It makes him feel better because no matter what, he just can't shake that feeling of worry. It's not like he has any _reason _to be worried- there're no signs of anything being wrong, and they've never had any problems before- but it's just always there no matter what. It's been there with all his kids; he just worries til he actually gets to hold them and see for himself that they're perfect.

It's crazy that he's still as freaked about the fourth as he was about the first, but he can't help it. It's scary waiting all those months, but obviously it's totally worth it. He wouldn't trade his kids for anything in the universe because they are seriously the most awesome kids in the world. It's a big change, though- a few years ago, he had one kid… in a few months, he'll have four. It's a lot of change and a lot of responsibility, but he's up for it because he knows it's definitely going to be worth the payoff.

When he finally gets home, things are going full force.

Jake's at the kitchen table doing homework. Hunter is standing up in the chair beside him, leaning over his books and whining every time Jake pushes him away. They both ignore him when he walks in, so he just leaves them to it- better than dealing with the whining. Quinn's in the living room fighting with Ethan who obviously won't stay in time out. Yeah, nice picture perfect little family.

"Daddy!" Ethan runs right to him, and Sam catches him because he's never gonna like _not _hug his kids no matter what. Quinn looks completely over it, though.

"What's going on?" Sam carefully untangles Ethan from around his legs and looks over at Quinn questioningly.

She rolls her eyes and points to a place on the hardwood that's now decorated with red marker. Sam just sighs because this isn't the first and won't be the last time he'll find himself trying to get stains out of the floor. Chances are they'll just have to end up moving the furniture around some to hide it in the end because that stuff hardly ever comes out.

"Ethan, get over here," she says sternly, and Ethan just whines and tries to do anything _but _go to the time out corner. Quinn literally looks like she's about to grab him and choke him, so Sam steps in to save them all from that.

"Here, I'll get it." Quinn just looks at him, and he nods. "I got it." She gives one more disappointed look at Ethan but finally goes back to the kitchen where she'll be forced to break up the impending fight that is undoubtedly already going on or will happen any second now between Jake and Hunter.

Sam kind of nudges Ethan toward the corner, but he gets a whole bunch of resistance and some whining of, "I don't _want _to go in the corner!"

"You know you're not supposed to color on the floor," Sam tries to be reasonable. "Markers are for paper only, you know that." Seriously, they have had this conversation a hundred times. Not to mention the fact that Ethan most likely got the markers out without permission because otherwise Quinn probably would have had him at the table- lesson learned too many times.

Ethan just screams that it was an accident, which is his go-to defense for just about anything that might get him in trouble. Sam shakes his head and tells him to sit down.

"No!"

"Ethan." He squats down to get closer to his level and keeps his tone calm but firm. "You're in time out. Stop arguing, and sit down."

Ethan's face scrunches up like he's about to explode with anger or something, but then he just looks sad instead, with tears welled up in those big green eyes. It's weird how literally every member of their family looks alike with blonde hair and green eyes, except for Jake who has blonde hair and blue eyes. But his kids definitely all look alike, and people have been telling him since he was fifteen that he and Quinn looked like brother and sister. It used to piss him off and weird him out, but looking at their kids, maybe there's some honest truth to it.

"_Ethan," _and he tries to put enough warning into his voice to at least scare him into sitting down.

It works because Ethan finally pouts up enough and sits down. He sits there with his back against the wall crying for three full minutes over God only knows what until Sam finally bends back down to talk to him again.

"Do you know why you had to sit in the corner?" Ethan gives a tearful nod, and there's snot peeking out of his nose. "You don't draw on the floor, buddy. Only on paper, you know that." He gets another shaky nod in response. This part of parenting really sucks because he hates seeing tears like that, but it's part of the job. "Did you ask permission to use markers?" This answer is a little hesitated, but then Ethan finally gives his head a little shake. "Why didn't you ask Momma first?"

"Because she say no!" And it sounds so dramatic that Sam actually kind of wants to laugh, but he doesn't. He knows stuff like this _is _dramatic to a three year old, and Ethan's not exactly an _under-_reactor in any situation.

"You ask before you color." He tries to keep his voice serious because this is all going to be a waste if Ethan knows he's secretly a little amused. "Understand?"

He gets another little nod, and then he smiles and tells Ethan he can get up. Ethan's still not happy, but he stands up anyway and follows Sam back into the kitchen where Quinn's got Hunter trying to count while Jake's got a science book open and is trying to do some worksheet from his notebook.

"Did he do his time out?" Quinn looks up from the counting book when they come in. Ethan's still a little pouty, but he goes to stand beside Jake and tries to look at what he's doing. This will last for probably thirty seconds before Jake gets pissed and starts complaining that the babies are always bothering him and ruining his life.

Sam decides to take advantage of the time he has and nods as he sits down in one of the empty chairs. Hunter seems to notice him for the first time and wiggles his way out of Quinn's arms to run around the table and climb into Sam's lap. So much for the counting lesson. Hunter starts babbling something that's mostly incoherent. He's a pretty good talker, but he has to be in the mood to actually make sense- otherwise, he just likes to hear himself make a whole bunch of random sounds.

"So what did the doctor say?"

"He didn't do an ultrasound, but he said the heartbeat sounds good and everything looks normal. I have to go for a sugar test in two weeks, but he said it all looks good."

That's literally as far as they get before Ethan tries to climb into Jake's chair with him, and Jake pushes him down and literally throws his pencil across the room in frustration.

…

He wakes up to his phone vibrating from the nightstand.

It's dark in his bedroom, but he reaches out blindly to find his phone and stop the buzzing. He gets his eyes open enough to glance at the ID before he answers, and he's really surprised to see the name.

"Hello?" he asks sleepily, and he looks at the alarm clock to see that it's only 5:30.

"Sam?" Of course it is- who else would be answering his phone? "It's Eileen."

He knows who it is. And this is literally the very first time in thirteen years that she's ever referred to herself as Eileen. "Hi." He doesn't really know what else to say. Mrs. Fischer rarely calls him, and she certainly doesn't call him at 5:30 in the morning. Hell, it's only _4:30 _in Nashville.

"I hope I didn't wake you." His initial reaction is to tell her that _of course _she woke up, but he can tell by her voice that something is wrong, so he doesn't. She may not be his favorite person in the world, but he's not cruel. "I just…" He can hear her take a breath, and he knows she's having to force the words out. "I just wanted to let you know that Carl passed away last night. He had a heart attack."

She's speaking in a very controlled sort of voice, and he knows that she is clearly trying to keep everything together. It's possible that she doesn't even realize what time it is. Sam instantly feels terrible for her.

"I'm so sorry…" He doesn't know what to say. He never knows what to say in these kinds of situations.

He can feel Quinn moving, and he watches as she rolls over to look at him, obviously confused as to why he's on the phone when they should be sleeping for another hour.

"Yes, well, we haven't made arrangements yet." Her voice is back to business, and the tiny bit of wavering is gone. He knows she's just doing her best to cope, so he doesn't judge the fact that she can switch back to no-nonsense so quickly. "I will let you know. I just thought you should tell Jake."

"I will… I'm really sorry…"

They talk for maybe another minute, and then she says she has to go and that she will speak with him later. She hangs up without an actual goodbye.

"What's wrong?" Quinn's staring at him when he hangs up, and he feels a little bit sick to his stomach.

"Mr. Fischer had a heart attack last night…" He swallows. "He died."

"Oh, no."

"I… I gotta tell Jake."

Quinn gives him this look that's fully sympathetic, but it doesn't make him feel any better. Maybe Jake's not as close to the Fischers as he is to his other grandparents, but that doesn't mean he won't be affected by this. It's his grandfather, and he's going to be upset. It sucks, and Sam doesn't even know how he's supposed to go about all this. It's not like he's going to just go into his room and wake him up and tell him. But he _does _need to know, somebody's got to tell him.

And Sam has to be the one to do it.

He's not looking forward to it.

…

A/N: Thanks for reviewing the last chapter! Y'all are awesome, and I love everyone who reviews. Hope you're enjoying the story!


	3. Chapter 3

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Part 3**

…

The last time Jake had any significant exposure to death, he was four months old.

He's seen it a few times since then- a few of the elderly people in their church, even a seventeen year old neighbor who was killed in a motorcycle accident. But really, he's never been exposed to it in any _real _way since he was a baby, so it's not that surprising that he doesn't seem to really understand.

He understands _death, _of course. He knows what it means when someone dies; he knows that _everyone _eventually dies. He has a lot of _whys, _though. He wants to know _why _the doctors couldn't help his grandfather. He wants to know _why _he died if he wasn't sick. He wants to know _why _it happened so suddenly. Sam doesn't have the answers for any of that.

Jake doesn't immediately show much emotion. He wants his questions answered, but he doesn't cry or seem overly sad. In fact, he's almost mechanical in the way he reacts and just wants answers. Sam's not sure if that's necessarily a _good _thing, but Quinn tells him that everyone feels things differently. It still worries him a little bit that his son seemingly has no emotional reaction to a grandparent dying, but maybe it's normal.

Mrs. Fischer calls back with the funeral arrangements, and there's basically only one day to get ready. They decide that Sam will take Jake to Tennessee, and Quinn will stay with Ethan and Hunter. She asks him if he's sure that's okay, but it's the best plan. There's no point in dragging Ethan and Hunter along, and while they could most likely stay with his parents, he's not exactly sure Quinn would feel comfortable anyway. She's met the Fischers, but they've never been overly welcoming of her. So yes, this is the best option.

Jake has to miss school for a few days, but Sam talks to his teacher and gets a list of all the assignments he's going to miss. Jake can do some homework in the car, and they'll make time to get the rest finished. His teacher says to take his time and they'll work it out, and Sam's really glad that his son goes to a school that's so understanding. It really means a lot to know that they care about his child in a real way.

It still doesn't make any of this any easier.

…

Tennessee doesn't feel like home to him anymore.

He's not sure when that happened, but when he goes there, he always feels like he's visiting- not like he's "going home." He grew up there and spent most of his childhood there, but he's now officially been gone for longer than he lived there. So something's changed somewhere along the way, and it's no longer his home.

When he graduated high school and went to MTSU, he felt like he was just going back where he came from. It felt natural and normal, and now that he thinks about it, it kind of was. It's weird to think now… like about how different things would be if stuff hadn't happened the way it did. To be honest, he probably never would have left Tennessee again if Julia hadn't died. He would have proposed to her, they probably would have gotten married, and they would have settled down somewhere around Nashville. He's not going to be idealistic and say that they would have lasted forever (but maybe they would have- who knows?), but even if they separated, he probably would never have left. He'd stay there because that's where his son would be, and chances are, he'd never go anywhere else.

Honestly, though, he hates thinking about that. If he'd never left, he wouldn't have his life now. If he'd never left Tennessee, he wouldn't have Quinn or Ethan or Hunter or a new baby in just a few months. Realizing how much upset he gets at the thought of missing out on all of that makes him feel incredibly guilty. It's like a double-edged sword or something. He can't be happy that one girl died so he could have another- thinking like that makes him a terrible person.

But it's hard to imagine a world where he _wouldn't _want the life he has now.

He can't say what might have been or how he would have felt because he has no real way of knowing. He loved Julia. It was an immature kind of love, yeah, because they were young and really just kids. But he loved her, and after Jake was born, he really thought he wanted to marry her. He was waiting on a good time to ask her- hell, he couldn't even afford a ring. But yeah, he would have married her, and yes, he loved her. But it's impossible to know if he would have ever loved her the way that he loves Quinn. He loves her so much that sometimes it literally hurts. He can't imagine being married to anyone else and being as totally and completely in love with his life as he is now. He loves Quinn the way his dad loves his mom, and that's all he's ever wanted in life.

He can't imagine that with anyone else.

…

He and Jake stay in a hotel because, well, Sam honestly doesn't feel comfortable staying at the Fischers'.

Mrs. Fischer said they could stay, but he doesn't want to. He'd rather pay for a hotel and not have to worry about overstepping some kind of invisible boundaries. He doesn't feel comfortable there- he's _never _felt comfortable there, even just when he was dropping Jake off for a visit. He's tried not to dwell on it, but he knows that they've never liked him. He doesn't think that's going to magically change now that Mr. Fischer has passed.

It's dumb because he's thirty-two years old, but he still feels nineteen when he's in that house.

They _do _go over to visit, and Sam's unsurprised to find so many people over paying their respects. It gives him an almost instant sense of déjà vu, and he immediately hates it. He doesn't want to keep thinking about it, but it's like everything about this is nearly a direct replica of where he was twelve years ago. He didn't want to come here when Julia died. He wanted to hold a grudge and not offer any kind of condolences to the people who refused to let him see her during the four days she was alive after the accident. He was resentful and angry over the fact that he'd literally _begged _them and had consistently been told, "Family only," while he watched her friends and sorority sisters write on Facebook about how they'd visited and clearly been allowed to see her. Apparently getting black-out drunk together made someone family but creating a freaking _human being _together meant nothing. So he never got to see her, never got to talk to her or tell her he loved her or goodbye or _thank _her for giving him the most amazing gift in the world…

So yes, he was resentful.

His parents forced him to come, though. They came after the accident, and when Julia died, they made him go with them to the Fischers' house to pay their respects. It was so crowded that you could barely move through the house. Of course, it wasn't surprising. Julia was a beautiful nineteen year old girl with a million friends and a ton of people who loved her, so obviously there was an outpouring of sympathy when she died. It's weird to see some of those friends- Julia's girlfriends that he hasn't seen since he left. They all recognize him and come up to him, oohing and awing over how big Jake is and grilling him about his current life. It's a little bit different from all the subdued looks of sympathy he got twelve years ago.

The main difference between then and now is that back then, Mrs. Fischer refused to even acknowledge Sam's presence with anything more than a solemn, "Thank you," when he and his parents told her how sorry they were. Today, though, she hugs him for the first time ever and then turns her attention to Jake and hugs him like her life depends on it. It's more than a little weird. Obviously Sam is shocked that she hugged _him, _but he's also shocked at the way she's treating Jake. It's not like she's ever been _mean _to him, but there's always been a level of distance there that doesn't exist between Jake and his other grandmother. It's no one's fault- it's just circumstance. Jake doesn't _know _her like he knows Sam's mom. He sees one every day and the other once a year. It's just the way things are.

So he's really surprised at how affectionate Mrs. Fischer's suddenly being.

Jake seems a little shocked, too, but thank God he has enough sense and manners not to be too obvious about it. He looks just a little bit uncomfortable, so Sam tries to tell him with just a look that it's okay. It obviously works because Jake lets himself be fawned over and doesn't do anything super rude like he might to most anyone else who might try the same kind of thing.

She doesn't really seem willing to let Jake go too far, so Sam gets introduced to a ton of people he's never met and will likely never see again. She tells them all, "This is my grandson, Jake. And this is his father, Sam." And it's like everything is normal and they haven't spent more than a decade trying to avoid each other as much as possible.

It's incredibly weird.

…

The funeral brings on a whole new round of déjà vu.

It's in the family church, and the first and only time Sam's ever been here was at Julia's funeral. He hates all these sudden reminders, not because he hates thinking about her, but because it _hurts. _He's been through a lot in his life, lost a lot, too. But losing Julia was honestly the hardest thing he's ever had to live through, just because it seemed to be taking his whole life away.

It's the first time Jake's ever seen a dead body in person, and it's not surprising that he's morbidly curious about it. He spends several minutes at the casket, just staring at his grandfather's body like he's thinking too hard about something. Sam should probably make him move, but he doesn't feel like it would be right. If Jake needs to look at a body to better come to terms with the situation, then that's what he needs. He still hasn't cried, but he seems very tense when he finally sits down, and he doesn't even _try _paying attention during the service.

The burial is worse, though. Sam hates cemeteries, and he hates burials. He hates how everyone is crowded into one tiny space and how it's impossible to ignore the fact that Mrs. Fischer is finally starting to lose it. She's done a good job of holding up so far, but this is apparently pushing her over the edge, and Sam feels really uncomfortable and out of place, even though he's probably technically less out of place than half the people here.

But then it really gets terrible when Sam realizes Jake's even more distracted than he was during the actual funeral- so distracted, in fact, that he's managed to wander about ten feet away to another grave, one that Sam's purposely been avoiding for years.

He doesn't immediately know what to do. If he goes over to him, it's just going to draw attention, and the last thing he wants right now is people looking at him. On the other hand, it's probably not healthy to just let Jake stand there and stare at something when he's already obviously very confused. God must like him or something, though, because he hears the preacher ask everyone to bow their heads for one final prayer. He does, but he keeps his eyes opened and trained on Jake, thankful that this part is over as well.

There's a lot of commotion after that- people moving around, hugging each other and talking while the crowd breaks apart. It's easy then to go over to Jake, who's still standing in the same spot he's been for the last few minutes. Jake looks up at him for a second, and Sam doesn't know what to say, but he turns his attention back to the headstone within seconds anyway. Sam looks down as well, trying really hard not to feel as much as he's feeling. It's a nice headstone- he's seen it before, once, a long time ago- and there's a spray of pink and yellow flowers sitting on top of it. Neither one of them says anything for a few minutes, but then Jake finally breaks and signs, "Is that my mom?"

Sam just nods because really, what else is he supposed to say?

…

Sam feels guilty.

Twelve years, and he's never had an honest-to-God talk with Jake about Julia. He's not sure why- it' s not like he's been _avoiding _the subject, it's just never come up. Jake has mentioned her a handful of times, and Sam's always just given him whatever answer he was looking for and moved on. The only time he's really asked about her death was when he was really little and asked Sam's mom. He seemed to accept her answer and just move on from it. Sam's never known how to really approach the topic, and it's honestly those kinds of questions that he'd rather just answer as they come instead of bringing it up.

Jake doesn't bring it up for the rest of the day. When they leave the cemetery, they go to Mrs. Fischer's house out of respect, and her church brings even more food that will, undoubtedly, largely go uneaten like the massive amount of food that's already been given to fill the kitchen. It's not as completely awkward as it could be, so t hat's good at least, but Sam's still glad when they finally go back to the hotel for the night.

The hotel has free Showtime, so Sam finds a movie, and Jake settles down at the little round table in the corner to do his homework. Sam doesn't really care about the movie, so he sends a text to Quinn letting her know they're back for the night and to call him when she gets a chance. He just hits send when he realizes that Jake is staring at him.

"What's up?"

Jake's got this look on his face like he wants to say something but can't decide whether he should or not. It takes a few seconds, and then finally he gives in and asks what he wants to know. What happens when people die?

When Jake was little and asked where his mother was, Sam's own mom had told him some story about Jesus needing her home and angels and all that. It worked when he was little because it sounded like a fairy tale, but Jake doesn't like fairy tales anymore.

Sam tries to make it as simple as possible. "Their souls leave their bodies, and they go to heaven or hell."

But Jake shakes his head and signs quickly that he was talking about their bodies. What happens to their _bodies?_

Sam doesn't know what to say to that. To be totally honest, the idea of corpses in the ground freaks him out. It's not something he likes to think about, and it's definitely not something he wants to spend time explaining to his son. He doesn't know the sign for decompose, and he hates the idea of telling Jake that bodies in the ground rot and are eaten by maggots and worms.

"We bury them. So people have a place to go visit."

It's bullshit, and he's pretty sure Jake knows it. It's also kind of a kick in the balls because here he is telling his son that the whole purpose of burying bodies is so other people have a place to visit when he's never once taken his son to see his mother's grave. And seriously, he doesn't know why he never did. He just… He couldn't.

Jake seems to accept the answer, though, but a second later, he asks if the bodies stay there forever. Sam tells him they do, and then he watches as Jake signs something he can't even fully comprehend at first. It takes him a few seconds to even piece together what he's asking.

_If we dig far enough, can I see my mom?_

Sam shakes his head no right away, and he doesn't do a good job at all of keeping the horrified look off his face. "No. No, you can't dig… You can't dig up bodies." This just causes Jake to ask why not, and Sam seriously feels ill for like the thirtieth time today. He tries to explain it the best way he can, and he hates, not for the first time, that he can't put the explanation into actual _words. _"Eventually… The bodies just become bones. They aren't real bodies anymore."

Jake is confused, and Sam doesn't blame him. He knows he's not doing a good job of explaining it, but it's really hard when he doesn't even know how to translate all the words he needs. Jake doesn't say anything for a few seconds, but then he frowns really big and looks down at the table. When he looks up, it's just to say _it's not fair._

Sam should probably ask for clarification, but he's pretty sure he doesn't need it. Instead, he gets up from the bed and goes to the other empty chair at the table so that he can have this conversation at a closer distance. "I know it's not fair," and he's being totally serious- he's not even trying to humor Jake or anything- it's seriously _not fair. _"And I'm really sorry…"

He's not sure what he's specifically apologizing for because he's sorry for a lot of things. He's sorry he never brought Jake to the grave before. He's sorry he never talked about her. He's sorry he wasn't there to save her… He's sorry for a lot basically.

It's obvious that Jake's struggling with something, and Sam's sure he's trying to decide whether or not to say whatever it is he wants to say. He's at an age where he likes to pretend like he's tougher than he really is, and he's also at that age where he gets embarrassed super easily. He finally says something, though- whether or not it's what's actually on his mind isn't clear. He looks up and says how it isn't fair that everyone else gets to have a mom.

"I know." Sam shakes his head a little bit. He doesn't know what to say, and it's kind of breaking his heart a little bit.

Jake still looks bothered by whatever's going on in his head, so Sam does his best to look totally neutral in some kind of attempt to make Jake feel comfortable enough to say whatever's on his mind. It takes another few seconds, but then Jake finally asks if his mom loved him.

"Yes," Sam says immediately. "_God, _yes. She loved you _so _much."

And that's seriously the truth. She spent the whole pregnancy whining about how boys' clothes were boring, boys' names weren't cute, girls' stuff was all so much cuter. But then like literally from the second Jake was born, she was in total love with him. She never even wanted to put him down, and she spent all day every day holding him and playing with him. It was crazy how much she changed when he was born. She was never a _crazy _party girl, but she did like to have fun, and she spent most of her weekends out with her friends at parties. After Jake was born, though, she had no desire to go out anywhere, and she would've much rather just stayed at home playing with the baby than going out with her friends.

She was seriously an awesome mom.

Jake looks a little placated by that answer, but he still seems worried or bothered or something. Sam doesn't know exactly what's going on, but he's sure that Jake's trying hard to hide it, whatever it is. He's a little surprised when Jake asks if Julia would _still _like him because…

"Of course she would! You're awesome!"

Jake doesn't smile or anything. He just signs that he gets in trouble a lot and then looks back down at the table like he's honestly embarrassed or something. And Sam feels like shit to be totally honest because he doesn't know what he's done to make his kid feel like this. It's his responsibility to _build _self-esteem, not like knock it down or whatever.

"You don't get in trouble a lot." He tries to shut down whatever's brewing there in Jake's head, but it's hard because… well, Jake _has _kind of been in trouble a lot lately. But overall, he's a really good kid- he's just going through a rough patch. "And even when you're in trouble, that doesn't mean people don't _like _you, Jake. You know everybody always loves you, right? No matter what?"

He can tell by the look on Jake's face that he _doesn't _know that, and Sam seriously feels like somebody just punched him in the stomach. What the hell is wrong with him if his own child doesn't know that people love him? Like… no matter what, no matter how much trouble he was in, Sam _never _doubted that his parents _loved _him. Seriously, he doesn't even know how that _happens. _

"Jake, I love you every day. Forever. Always. No matter what." He can't even believe he's _having _this conversation because he can't believe he's _that _much of a failure at being a parent.

Jake nods a little bit, but it's obvious that something's still bothering him. Sam doesn't know what else he could possibly say to get his point across. He looks at him, obviously telling him to just _say _whatever he's thinking. Jake looks almost scared, but then he still has that same frown and signs really quickly that it's not the same.

"Not the same as _what?"_

_Not the same as Ethan and Hunter._

Sam just stares at him. He doesn't even fully know what's happening right there, but he's fairly certain he can guess. His phone vibrates loudly from its place on the table, and he glances down to see that Quinn's calling him back. He hits the ignore button and looks back at Jake.

He wanted Jake to open up, but it really hurts when his son tells him that he doesn't think he's loved the same way that his brothers are- that they have a _real _mom and that he doesn't. Jake says there's a _new _family, and he's the only different one, that he doesn't fit in. It honest to God feels like somebody is stabbing Sam in the gut because… This is _not _what he ever wanted Jake to feel. And the fact that he _does _feel it has to be Sam's fault.

"That's not true. Not at all. You're _not _different." He has no idea if Jake's believing any of it, but he has to at least _try. _"I love you, and Quinn loves you. Just like Ethan and Hunter- no different, okay?"

Jake shrugs and then kind of nods, but he doesn't say anything. Sam seriously doesn't know how much more of this week he can take. He just wants to go home and forget all of this, but he knows that's never going to happen.

He's a little bit surprised when Jake actually lets him hug him. He doesn't let on at all that he can tell he's crying a little bit once his face is hidden.

He kind of wants to cry, too, to be honest.

…

They go see Mrs. Fischer once more before they leave town the next day.

They check out of the hotel in the morning and head over to say bye. Neither Sam nor Jake mentions the conversation from the night before, but Sam can't get it off his mind. Jake seems to have reverted back to the point of not really talking much at all unless it's to answer direct questions. When they get to his grandmother's house, he goes immediately to the backyard to play with Delilah, the chocolate lab that's been around since before he was born. Sam thinks about telling him to stop and come inside first, but he doesn't. Mrs. Fischer doesn't seem to mind anyway; she just invites him in and offers him a variety of breakfast foods that were left by her church. He's not even remotely hungry, but he takes a muffin anyway, just not to appear rude. He's happy to accept the cup of coffee she pours for him, though, and he says a quiet thank you and tries not to think about how awkward it is to be sitting here alone with her in the kitchen.

She sits down with him, looking a little worse today than she did yesterday. Her eyes are rimmed red, and it's pretty obvious that she finally let herself go after everyone left last night. She doesn't look like she slept much, if any, and Sam can relate because he stayed up half the night going over the past twelve years- specifically the past _five _years- trying to figure out what he could have done that would make his son think he didn't _love _him.

"I'm glad you came by." She sounds as tired as she looks, and he actually feels very sorry for her. "I wanted to talk to you yesterday, but there were just so many people…"

"It's okay. There was a lot going on."

She nods a little and then gives him this really sad kind of smile. "I really appreciate you coming. And bringing Jake."

"Of course." Because seriously? Like he would _not _bring his son to his grandfather's funeral.

"I know I haven't always made you feel welcome." It seems to come out of nowhere, and Sam looks at her with slight confusion. "But you a_re _a part of this family."

The shock must be evident on his face, but… "I… Thank you." He has no idea what he's supposed to say to that. He's not even sure why he's thanking her, he just can't think of anything else.

"I regret a lot of things. And I judged you before I knew you, I'll admit that. But you're a good man, and I'm glad Julia had you."

Sam doesn't say anything. He just swallows the lump that's settled in his throat and looks down at his coffee. He feels uncomfortable, and it's incredibly awkward- mostly because he can't believe what he's hearing.

"I know that you treated her well. And I know that you loved her and respected her, and I'm more thankful for that than you know. I'm very thankful that her son has such a good father, and I should have told you that a long time ago."

Her words feel like they're cutting through him or something. On one hand, he never thought he would hear anything like this from her, and while he doesn't like to admit it, he's been secretly needing her approval for years. On the other hand, he feels like everything she's saying is wrong- at least the part about him being a good father because right now, he's not sure he could feel like a _worse _father.

"If I could go back and do things differently, I would." Her voice sounds a little bit choked up, but he doesn't look at her. It's still too awkward. "But I can't, so I want you to at least know now."

Sam ducks his head just a tiny bit in a nod. He doesn't know what to do with any of this- what to say or how to react. So he just nods and hopes that's enough.

"I also wanted to tell you that the will has Jake getting everything when I'm gone."

That especially seems to come out of nowhere, and Sam has no choice but to follow his instant reaction and look up. It's the first he's heard of anything like that, and to be perfectly honest, he's more than a little shocked.

"The house will be sold. All of the money will go into a trust if he's not old enough to inherit it."

Sam shakes his head a little. "You… That's not necessary."

"He's the only thing we have left." She says we without even reacting, and Sam's not sure if she even realizes it. It will probably take awhile for her to stop referring to herself as a we, so he doesn't point it out. "So yes, all of it is his."

It's technically true. Julia was an only child, and Jake is _her _only child. He actually _is _the only person in line to inherit anything from this estate. But it's still insane. The Fischers are fairly well off, and there's probably a significant amount of money tied up just in the house alone. It's… It's too much.

But then Mrs. Fischer gets up and goes to a drawer at her kitchen counter. She comes back to the table with an envelope and hands it to Sam. He glances down and can see through it enough to tell that there's a check inside. He immediately starts to hand it back to her because the _last _thing he wants right now is some kind of charitable donation or something.

But she stops him. "It's what was left of Julia's college fund." She swallows, and he hates that he can see wetness pooling at the bottom of her eyes. "We should have…" She draws in a wavering kind of breath, and he really hopes she doesn't break down in tears right here. "It's Jake's. We should have given it to you a long time ago, but it was… It was just hard."

He tries once again to hand it back. "Thanks, but we-"

"Sam." She cuts him off with the same kind of tone his own mother uses when she's intent on getting a point across. "I know how expensive his school is." She hesitates for a second and then says, "Julia can't use it."

He feels his own eyes watering, and he bites down hard on the back of his teeth to make sure no tears start falling. He feels like… The worst. The worst everything. He feels like a failure because to tell the honest truth, they _need _that money. He can't even pay for his child's school without making his family eat store-brand pasta three times a week. His own son thinks he doesn't _love _him and that he's happier with some kind of replacement family. And here he is crying over a dead ex-girlfriend when he has a pregnant wife at home who's supposed to complete everything about him and fill any kind of holes left from a girl he loved a long time ago who probably would have eventually been his wife if she hadn't swerved into an oncoming lane of traffic one night to avoid a motorcycle that was switching lanes without looking. None of this is right. He sucks at everything, and he really doesn't think he's ever felt worse in his whole life than he does right now.

The worst part is that he can't even say any of that. All he can do is choke out a thank you and try really hard not to break down sobbing at the kitchen table.

…

He calls Quinn on the way home when Jake falls asleep in the front seat with his head leaned up against the window.

He tells her he's sorry for not answering last night and for not calling back. She asks if everything's okay, and he tells her it is. He asks about the kids, and she tells him some story about Hunter stealing some kid's tricycle at the park. He should probably laugh, but nothing really seems funny right now.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just tired." He lies because it's easier than going into any part of the truth.

"Well, be careful. If you get too tired, pull over."

"I will." He knows his voice sounds dull and lifeless, but it kind of is. He knows Quinn can tell, too, but she doesn't call him on it. "I'll see you in a few hours, okay?"

"Okay. I love you."

"I love you, too."

It's the only thing out of his mouth that's not a lie.

…

A/N: Ahhhh… So I know there was like NO Quinn in this chapter, and I'm sorry! But oh, the angst. My heart hurts right now. Also, super fast update. Wouldn't count on the next one being THIS fast, but hopefully it won't be too long. Again, thanks a ton for the reviews!


	4. Chapter 4

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Part 4**

…

It's the dumbest kind of fight because it's all based on overreaction.

What's worse, though, is that Sam _knows _this and still lets it happen anyway.

He has to go to work Saturday night, and when he gets home, he can automatically tell that things aren't great. Ethan and Hunter are fighting over a stupid foam ball (and seriously, there are like five more just like it in their room), and Quinn and Jake both have really irritated looks on their faces, so he doesn't even _know _what's going on there. He's just really tired- physically and mentally- and all he wants to do is like lay down on the couch and relax for a little while. But he can already tell that's not happening.

He tells the boys to go get another ball and to stop fighting, but they just ignore him because apparently _this _is the only ball worth having. But he's not in the mood right now, and seriously, it's like his kids _don't freaking listen. _So he grabs the ball from them because if they can't learn how to share or, you know, do what he tells them to do, then they're both gonna lose it. This, of course, causes screams and heightens the tantrum level to about a ten, but he's seriously not dealing with it right now. He tells them that and tells them they can both go to the corner if they don't cut it out. That calms Hunter down just a little bit, and instead of screaming, he just turns on the tears. Ethan yells at Sam that he's mean, and Sam rolls his eyes at a three year old because seriously? Whatever.

He can look at Quinn and Jake and know they're having some kind of conflict of their own, mostly likely related to the homework Jake has laid out in front of him. He probably doesn't feel like he should have to do homework on a Saturday night, and it's pretty obvious that Quinn feels differently. Sam just barely catches a glance of Jake saying he's finished, and then Quinn kind of flips on him a little bit.

"No, you're not. You still have two more subjects, I have your homework list. Stop lying."

Jake gives her this look that's like specifically reserved for her and Sam, and the only way to describe it is that it's the best _go to hell _look a really small twelve year old can manage. They've been receiving it for about a year now on various occasions, and Sam _knows _how hard it is not to reach across the table and seriously smack it off his face.

Quinn, doesn't, of course, but she does tell him that he can either do his homework or he can be grounded. And then Jake just shrugs like he doesn't give a shit and literally starts putting his stuff back into his backpack so he can go to his room and start the grounding.

So yes, it's not surprising that Quinn looks like she's on the edge of a nervous breakdown. Between Jake and the two little ones who are still throwing mini-tantrums over how _mean _Sam is, it's really no shock that she seems ready to either murder someone or break down in tears.

Instead, she finally acknowledges Sam's presence and says, "You need to handle your son because I'm sick of it."

It's a passing comment- one she's made probably a hundred times before in regards to one thing or another. She's said it about Jake, about Ethan, about Hunter… They all become _your son _or _your child _when they're being particularly bad and she doesn't want to deal with it anymore. Hell, even the baby becomes _your daughter _if she's being particularly restless or making Quinn feel ill.

But all of a sudden today, her words just really hit Sam the wrong way.

He may give her a look almost identical to the one Jake's perfected that drives them both insane. He doesn't even bother responding to her because the only things he wants to say really aren't appropriate when there's a two and a three year old in the room (although they probably couldn't even hear it over their own current drama). Instead, he just grabs Jake's backpack from him and starts unpacking it again.

"Finish your homework," he says seriously because he's not particularly in the mood to deal with this, either. "Do it now."

Jake seriously has the balls to ask _or what? _And it literally takes every ounce of willpower Sam can muster to _not _reach over and slap him.

He's way too stressed out (and now pissed) to deal with any of this right now, so he's pretty sure the look on his face is warning enough, but he adds, "Or you'll be sorry," before he points at the homework and says, "_Do it." _

Jake rolls his eyes, but he picks up his pencil anyway. _Or you'll be sorry _is a joke, and they both know it. Jake clearly doesn't care to be grounded- hell, he'd _prefer _to be alone in his room anyway. They basically have to force him to come out, so being grounded is the perfect excuse to get what he wants. And seriously? What else can they really do? Nothing. It just sucks that Jake figured it out so early because that doesn't really bode well for the teenage years.

Sam can't really resist it any longer, so he turns back to Quinn and says, "Sorry you have to deal with _my son," _and gives her this disgusted look before he leaves to _finally _go put his gym stuff down.

He's seriously pissed, and even though he knows Quinn obviously didn't mean anything with her comment, it still bugs the crap out of him. He hasn't even told her everything that happened in Tennessee- he basically just told her that Jake started asking a bunch of questions about Julia, and obviously he told her all about the money Mrs. Fischer gave them and the fact that Jake's apparently in line to inherit everything they have. He couldn't make himself tell her that Jake feels like they don't love him as much as they love Ethan and Hunter, and he _definitely _couldn't make himself tell her that Jake doesn't feel like it's fair that Ethan and Hunter get to have a "real mom."

But he's seriously not been able to stop thinking about it.

It sucks because he doesn't feel like he can tell anyone, not even Quinn- _especially _not Quinn. He could maybe tell his mom or something, but he's not sure how she would react to that. She can't ever seem to react to _anything _about Jake rationally, and she never has been. She's always freaks out whenever anything is wrong with him, and she babies him like crazy. She would stage some kind of huge intervention to find out exactly what's wrong with Jake that would end with her saying he should just come live with them so he can get enough one-on-one attention. His dad is less dramatic but also less sympathetic. Not to mention that his dad actually kind of _warned _him that this might happen back before he and Quinn were even married. He told him he was happy he found someone and all that but that he needed to be careful because Jake might eventually start having some kind of issues. At the time, Sam had brushed it off because Jake loved Quinn, and he couldn't see that ever changing. And it _hasn't _changed.Jake's become more comfortable with Quinn, so yeah, sometimes he treats her exactly like he treats Sam (which isn't always nice), but he still _loves _her. He still wants a hug from her every night before bed and every morning before school. He still runs to her with good news. He still complains to her first when he doesn't feel well. Nothing has changed besides the stuff that's changed all around. So seriously, if this is really how Jake's been feeling all along, then Sam's an ever bigger screw up as a parent than he originally imagined because he feels like it totally came out of nowhere.

Quinn follows him into the bedroom where he's stuffing his bag into the closet, and he tries really hard not be as pissed as he really kind of feels. He knows it's dumb, and he makes an actual honest effort to just _not feel it. _But it's really hard when Quinn shuts the door behind her, puts a hand on her hip, and says, "What the hell is your problem?"

He hates her tone immediately. _That _tone. The one that makes her sound like a sixteen year old head cheerleader bossing around a clueless little boy. He dealt with it when he _was _a clueless little boy, but he's not now, and they both know it. So when that tone slips out (and it _does- _not often, but often enough), it automatically puts him in defense mode.

"I don't have a problem." His bag won't fit into its usual spot, and he's pretty sure that's just an excuse to let him take some frustration out on forcing it to. "So if you could just leave me alone right now, that would be awesome."

He's not looking at her, but he knows what look hits her face anyway. He knows her too well, and it's way too easy to imagine. "Excuse me. I didn't realize I wasn't allowed to be in my own bedroom."

"Well, now you know." He's a jackass- whatever.

"You know, maybe you should open your mouth and tell me when something's wrong instead of acting like an immature asshole." Her voice gets louder, and he doesn't particularly like her calling him an asshole (even if he knows he kinda _is _being one), so he drops his bag on the floor and rounds on her.

"Could you keep your voice down?" he asks hatefully. "Just because _my _son is deaf doesn't mean _yours _are."

"What the hell are you even _talking _about?"

"I don't appreciate you making some distinction about him, calling him _my _son like he's not an important part of this family!"

Quinn just stares at him, and it's obvious that she's confused. But whatever, he doesn't even care right now because he just wants to be pissed. "Are… Are you even _serious _right now?"

"Yes, I'm serious! How do you _really _think that makes him feel when you say shit like that?"

"That's not even what I meant, and you know it."

"Maybe _I _do, but he's a twelve year old kid!"

"Jake knows it, too!" She seems totally lost, and it's not like he really blames her. But still. It's so much easier to deal with this when he's angry, so he just goes with it.

"Really?" And he rolls his eyes because it just feels like the right thing to do. "Well, maybe that stupid talk you wanted me to have with him about sex or his balls dropping or _whatever _wasn't really the problem! Maybe the problem is that he doesn't feel like a real part of this family!"

"That's _crazy." _He can tell she's being totally serious, too, and that kind of just irritates him even more. "Jake _knows _that's not true."

"Then why the hell did he tell me that he doesn't think we love him the same way we love Ethan and Hunter? That it's different because they have a _real _mom?"

He literally feels like shit a split second later. He shouldn't have said it, and he _really _shouldn't have said it like _that. _He watches as the words sink in for Quinn and sees the way her whole face falls a few seconds later. She honestly looks like somebody's just slapped her, and in a way, he guesses he kind of just did.

"Quinn-"

"Are you _serious?" _Her voice is tiny now, and she kind of just drops down onto the bed, sitting there with some stunned look on her face like she can't believe this is really happening or something.

"He's just confused…" He doesn't believe anything coming out of his own mouth, but he literally cannot handle when Quinn looks like that. He doesn't care what he has to say or lie about to make her stop looking like her heart is breaking- he'll just say it. "He knows it's not true, he's just…"

"Why would he think that?"

"It's just little stuff." He's desperate to make her feel better, and he wants to just go back thirty seconds and stop himself from speaking. "He thinks he gets in trouble a lot more than they do, like when they get in trouble it's only for a few minutes, but when he does, it's for days. I told him it's just because he's older, but you know how kids are. He thinks he always gets in trouble if he's mean for them, but they don't ever get in trouble for bothering him all day. I mean, just stupid kid stuff. I used to feel the same way when I was kid. It's normal."

He's rambling because he wants to make everything okay. He didn't mean to tell her, and he hates that she looks so sad now. Plus, all of that stuff is true- Jake _did _bring it all up, and it really _is _just normal kid stuff. Sam knows from experience how annoying it is to have younger siblings who seem to get away with everything in the world. His parents were super, super strict with him, but they backed _way _off with his brother and sister, and yeah, it was obvious and made him kind of resentful at times.

But he never saw any of that as his parents not _loving _him. _That's _what he can't get past with Jake.

"It's not _normal." _Quinn seriously looks like she's about to burst into tears. "He thinks I don't _love _him."

Sam just shakes his head as fast as he can. "No. No, he does, I promise. It's just kid stuff."

"I don't even know what I'm doing wrong!"

"Nothing!" He drops down to kneel in front of her, so he can look up at her. Her eyes are starting to water, and he puts one hand on her knee and rubs it a little bit. "You're not doing anything wrong, I swear. You're a _great _mom."

"Just not a _real _one." Her voice is dull and lifeless on that, and he's kind of never hated himself more than in that one second.

"Quinn…"

"Why didn't you tell me?" And she looks at him for an explanation with those hugely serious eyes that make every single part of him hurt. It's something he's always kind of hated about himself- he _feels _too much; he has too many emotions for a stereotypical man, but he can't help it. He's always been a little too sensitive and a little too open with his feelings- that's just how he is.

"I didn't want you to be upset," and it's the honest truth.

"So you lied to me."

"I didn't _lie _to you, Quinn." He sighs because he doesn't know where to go with any of this. He's already ruined it, and he's not sure he can save it now no matter what he says. "I don't know why he said any of that… It's not just you, either, it's both of us." His knees are starting to cramp, so he moves to sit beside her instead of kneeling. "But he's just… It's just kid stuff." It's such a lame explanation, but he can't come up with anything better.

"I don't feel any differently about him than I do about Ethan or Hunter. I _swear." _She sounds a little bit desperate like she really thinks he might not know that already. He does, though, he really does. As much as he loves her, he would never have married her if he wasn't one-hundred percent positive that she loved Jake, too.

"I _know. _I think he's just confused about a lot of stuff right now."

"Confused about whether I _love _him? I tell him that every day!"

So does Sam, but apparently Jake needs more than that. He doesn't point this out; instead, he just tries to make sense of it. "I think seeing Julia's grave and dealing with death and all that has just made him think about stuff more… I don't know, that's probably all my fault."

Quinn still looks miserable, but she shakes her head just a little bit. "It's not your fault."

"I've never talked about her…" Sam swallows the lump that's starting to settle at the back of his throat, and he's careful to keep his voice as even as possible. "He doesn't know anything about her. That _is _my fault."

Quinn doesn't say anything. She looks down at her feet, and he knows he owes some kind of explanation- to her, to Jake… He needs to come to grips with it, but it's difficult.

"It's just hard," he says quietly. "It's hard to talk about her because I miss her…"

Quinn stays silent. He's not really surprised, but he wishes he was better with words so that he could somehow be honest without making her feel like crap, but he knows that's not going to happen regardless of what he wants. He can tell by the way she's chewing in the inside of her cheek that she's trying really hard not to show too much.

"I just… You don't know how many years I spent wishing that I was in that car instead of her." He's never said that out loud before, never admitted it to anyone but himself. It tastes as terrible in his mouth as it sounds in his head. "Not because I wanted to be dead or wanted to leave my family or anything like that. Just because it wasn't fair to Julia…"

"Death like that is never fair." Quinn's voice is steady and to the point, and he can look at her and tell it's that way on purpose.

"I know, but that doesn't make it any easier to deal with. She missed _so _much, and that's all I could think about for years. Like literally. She missed her family, she missed graduating, she missed getting married, she missed her friends, she missed _Jake. _And the only thing I missed was _her."_

"And you still miss her."

He knows he's just making a mess of things, but he's just telling the truth. He _needs _to talk about this- not talking about it is what messed things up in the first place. "Yeah, but…"

"Wonderful."

"Quinn." He shakes his head. "This doesn't change anything, I-"

"It _does _change things if you're still in love with another woman!" She's staring at him like he's crazy, and to be totally honest, he _feels _a little bit crazy right now. He doesn't even know how it got turned into this.

"I'm not in _love _with her. Are you kidding me?" He stares at her, kind of in disbelief that she'd even turn it into that. "I'm in love with _you. _You can't be mad that I had a girlfriend before you, how many boyfriends have you had?"

"Plenty," she says without even missing a beat. "But I don't even _think _about any of them anymore."

"You also don't wake up every single morning and see their eyes sitting at your breakfast table!" He doesn't mean to snap like that, but damn. "I'm sorry if it bothers you, but I can't _look _at Jake and not think about Julia. It's impossible."

Quinn looks down at her feet again and kind of looks embarrassed. "I know," she says quietly, but he can tell it's taking a lot for her to say anything.

"It's not the same thing as you and your ex-boyfriends. Julia and I didn't just grow apart or something and decide it would be best to end things. We didn't have some kind of huge dumb fight and break up. She met me on my lunch break one day, and we ate tacos and talked about putting some kind of cereal in Jake's bottle soon. And then she told me about the latest episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta. And then my break was over, and I kissed her, and she told me she'd DVR NCIS so we could watch it together later. And then like four hours after that, my manager told me I had a phone call, and it was some woman at the hospital telling me that my son had just been admitted there after a car accident. And then like a week later, I was at a funeral. So sorry if I can't just forget all that!"

It all comes spilling out really fast, and hears himself talking but can't make himself shut up until it's all out. He knows he's saying too much, but it's like he can't stop. It's weird to be saying all this stuff he's been thinking about for more than a decade, but maybe it's time. He's been holding everything in for way too long, and maybe it just needed to come out. But thinking about it- _talking _about it- it just makes his stomach hurt and his eyes burn, and he can't help the way he feels no matter how hard he tries.

Quinn shakes her head, and he watches her swallow before she stands up. He doesn't know what's going on in her head, he barely knows what's going on in his _own _head, but he can tell it's not super happy whatever it is. "You still love her…"

He wants to vomit. He doesn't even remember the last time he really felt this bad. He knows he has to fix this before it gets even more out of control, though, because right now, he's doing way more harm than good. "I love _you," _he says seriously, standing up, too, because he hates feeling vulnerable sitting down. "_You're _who I want to be with, and you are the _only _person I want to be married to." She stares at him like she wants to believe him. "It's just hard because even _that _makes me feel like shit."

"I make you feel like shit?"

"No," he shakes his head really fast. "I just feel _guilty _because it makes me sound like I'm glad she died or something so I could have you." Just saying it out loud makes him feel terrible. "I love you, and I want you. But I can't help it if I never got the chance to fall _out_ of love with her."

It's the wrong thing to say, and he can tell immediately. Quinn gives him this mini-glare, and then her voice is back to that sharp, no-nonsense icy kind of tone. "You don't tell your wife that you're in love with another woman. Even you should know that."

It's an obvious dig against his intelligence, but he can't even be bothered by it right now because there are way more important things going on. He's a little bit angry now, though- angry that she refuses to even _try _and see this rationally and angry that she seems hell-bent on making him feel even worse than he already does.

"I'm just being honest, Quinn. And I didn't say I was _in love _with her. I said I still miss her, and there's a big damn difference there. I also can't help it. We had a baby together, that's pretty huge."

Quinn doesn't even miss a beat before she levels a look at him and says, "Yeah, and you have three with me. So maybe you should start thinking more about _that _and less about the fact that you can't get over your dead ex-girlfriend."

He just stares at her and literally bites down on his tongue. He doesn't say anything because if he says what's really in his head, he's going to end up slapped across the face tonight and served with divorce papers tomorrow. So he just says nothing.

She obviously gets tired of waiting for his response because she swipes at her eye with the back of her hand and then slips right back into her bitchy tone. "I'm going to take care of your kids now. _All _of them." And then she just leaves, and he's honestly really fucking happy not to be looking at her anymore.

She doesn't get it. He knows she can't really understand what it's like, and he knows he probably didn't help the situation at all by admitting that he never got the chance to be fully over Julia. But whatever. Quinn's supposed to love him and all that shit, and if she really did, she'd be able to give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe she can't fully understand it or whatever, but she should at least trust him when he says that he loves _her _and wants _her _and doesn't want to be married to anyone else. She's supposed to trust him, but she doesn't. She's just like… _mean. _

His head's all messed up; it's been messed up ever since he got back from Tennessee. He's never talked about this before and has seriously never told another person. The last time he actually allowed himself to show any kind of emotion directly related to Julia, he was barely twenty years old and sitting in his bedroom floor with a baby that wouldn't stop screaming no matter what he tried. His mom finally came in and took Jake and magically got him to be quiet and actually go to sleep, and then she sat down in the floor with Sam and asked him how he was feeling, and he literally just burst into tears. Like he was six or something crying to his mommy. But she didn't judge him- she just hugged him and let him cry, and that was honestly the last time he ever really talked about it.

It sucks that he'd kind of like nothing more than to run to his mommy right now, too.

He doesn't, though, because several minutes into his self-wallowing, somebody knocks on the door. It's probably Quinn, and he doesn't want to talk to her at all right now, so he tells her to go away. Twenty seconds later, though, there's more knocking, and he realizes that whoever's on the other side probably can't _hear _him saying go away. So he gets up and opens the door, and he's not really surprised to see Jake standing there, but he _is _kind of surprised to see how nervous he seems to be.

Jake tells him that he finished his homework, and Sam just says, "Good," because he's not really in the mood to check and see if that's actually true. Maybe he should be, but he just doesn't want to deal with it right now.

Jake's eyes are all over the place, and Sam wants to make him stop fidgeting, but he doesn't. Jake looks down at the ground for several seconds and then finally looks back up, chewing on the corner of his lip right before he finally says what he obviously came in here to say.

_I'm sorry I made you and Quinn fight._

Sam shakes his head because… no. That's like the last thing he wants Jake thinking. Especially right now. "You didn't make us fight. I promise."

Jake doesn't look like he believes him, and he's got this weird frown on his face like he's thinking too much or something. He says something about Ethan saying that they were yelling, and Sam feels like shit because apparently they weren't doing a great job of hiding it from their kids. He feels even worse that Jake apparently thinks it's his fault. Jake says something else about Quinn being upset, and to be totally honest, Sam doesn't give a shit if she's upset right now. Maybe he should, but he just doesn't. Like he's really pissed off and bothered by the fact that she can just turn on him that fast.

He happens to glance his bag that's still sitting in the same spot he dropped it on the floor, and even though he literally _just _got back from the gym, he kind of feels like torturing his body might just make him feel better right now. He didn't get in a real workout anyway, and lifting might be the best thing at the moment. If that doesn't work, he can at least take some frustration out on a punching bag.

"Wanna go to the gym?" He looks at Jake who seems kind of surprised but nods anyway, so that's that.

He doesn't bother speaking directly to Quinn when they start to leave. He tells Ethan and Hunter instead, and they both start whining that they want to go, too, but he tells them, "Maybe next time," which is an empty promise, but it doesn't matter because they'll forget within minutes anyway. Jake hugs Quinn and seems a little nervous about doing it, but Sam tries not to pay much attention. She doesn't say a word to Sam, and he doesn't speak to her, either.

It actually kind of feels nice.

Jake mostly just hangs around and watches at the gym. It's kind of late on a Saturday, so there aren't a ton of people here or anything, so Sam works out, and Jake tells him some school stories and stuff while he lifts. He's not even remotely interested in working out or anything, and Sam doesn't try to encourage him, either, considering he's twelve and barely clears seventy-five pounds.

When it's over, though, he takes him for some late-night practice at the batting cages. Baseball's a sport where Jake's smaller-than-average stature isn't a negative. Sure, he might be able to hit with more force if he had a little more weight on him, but he's still one of the best hitters in the league regardless. He does really well at the batting cages, too, and Sam turns the speed up on the machine a little bit to give him a faster pitch. He misses the first few, so Sam gives him some pointers and helps him with his stance, and then Jake's hitting every pitch.

It's almost one in the morning when they get home, and they have church tomorrow. Jake's not used to being up this late, so he goes straight to bed. Sam grabs some water and a handful of grapes from the refrigerator before he peeks into his bedroom. Quinn's asleep, and he doesn't feel any sudden rush of forgiveness toward her just because she's now unconscious. It's kind of the opposite, in fact, and he knows there's no way he's sleeping with her tonight. He goes to the boys' room instead and finds them both sleeping on the bottom bunk. For a second, he considers getting the ladder out and stealing their top bed, but that would just be too much trouble. Instead, he just carefully scoots them both over a little bit and crawls in behind them. Ethan doesn't even stir, but Hunter kind of twitches and then blinks his eyes open in confusion. Sam shushes him and brushes some hair away from his forehead. It works because Hunter just lets his eyes fall back shut and rolls over so that he's curled right up against Sam with a thumb in his mouth and his free hand wrapped around Sam's neck.

Sam's surprised to find that he actually sleeps pretty well that night.

…

He manages to go four days without really talking to Quinn.

They're not _not _speaking, but when they talk, it's basically _only _about the kids. He started sleeping in his own bed again after that first night, but they purposely go to bed at separate times and wake up at separate times so that they don't have to acknowledge each other. It's probably childish, but it is what it is. He's still _really _mad, and Quinn has made no move whatsoever to fix things on her end, either, so whatever.

She failed her sugar test and has to go in for the long one. He asks if she wants him to go with her, and she makes some kind of passive-aggressive comment about how being there that long is going to be miserable enough and she doesn't need her husband there pouting to make it any longer. And that's kind of when he just snaps on her.

"I'm not the only one in this, Quinn, and whether you want to believe it or not, you're wrong, too."

That's all it takes apparently because she actually responds and doesn't even hesitate. "I never said I _wasn't _wrong, but you've been ignoring me for almost a week now!"

"You haven't exactly been bending over backwards to start too many conversations of your own."

"Because I don't know what you want me to _say! _Nothing's changed between four days ago and now."

"So you're still mad at me."

"I'm still _hurt, _Sam. Because maybe you can't realize it, but hearing somebody you're married to talk about somebody they used to be in love with _hurts."_

He stops himself from snapping back because they need to fix this. They need to calm down and _fix _it because all of this fighting and then not talking isn't doing anyone any good.

"I was just being honest with you. And it felt like you didn't even want to _try _and understand."

"Because I don't _want _to understand!" He stares at her, trying to stay calm and give her the benefit of the doubt and believe that she has something decent to follow that up with. "I don't want to hear about you still having feelings for somebody else, no matter _who _it was. I want to be enough for you, Sam." He can tell by her eyes and the way her voice is just edging on desperate that she's finally being honest, so he tries his best to do the same.

"You _are _enough, I swear. You know I didn't date anyone else between Julia and you, mostly because I just didn't have time, but also because I was scared of losing something else and because it didn't seem fair to her…" It's true, too. He went on a few dates, he slept with some women, but he didn't ever have any other girlfriends- he just couldn't. He lets out a little breath. "But when you came back it was different… I've _always _wanted you, Quinn," and he's telling the whole truth with that. "I'm never going to _not _want you."

She's got tears in her eyes again, and he feels bad for making her hurt. But he can't help it because he just needs her to know all of this.

"Please tell me you know that."

She nods, just a little, and he knows she's trying hard not to let any of those tears fall. "Can we stop fighting?" she asks quietly, and God, he seriously doesn't want anything more.

He still needs her to know some other stuff, though, so he says, "I love you, okay? I'm sorry if I ever made you doubt that."

"I didn't doubt it… I just…" She frowns again and swallows. "I'm just upset, and all of this is just hard."

He gets that. He could say that it's hard for him, too, but she already knows that. So he just nods because he really does get it.

And he's so tired of being miserable that he'd do just about anything to make all of this just go away.

…

A/N: More angst! But I promise it backs off some in the next part. Thank you, thank you to everyone who reviewed!


	5. Chapter 5

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Part 5**

…

He feels like he's spent half of his life getting nurseries ready.

He hasn't, of course, but when he's pulling the crib he _just _disassembled less than a year ago out of the attic, it really kind of feels like it. They aren't buying any new furniture, but Quinn's obsessed with completely redoing everything else. She wants new paint, new curtains, new bedding… He should have known having a girl would turn into this. She's not even born yet, and he _already _can't afford her.

It's kind of ridiculous how she already has a closet full of clothes and a dresser full of blankets and hairbows. Like seriously, what if she's bald? And those headband things with the giant flowers not only look ridiculous_, _they also look _painful. _But all Quinn sees is cute, cute, cute, and it seems like she's showing him new stuff every single day.

She's sitting in the rocking chair with a passed out Hunter while he lays out all the parts and gets to work putting the crib back together. Jake's at a friend's house, and Ethan is trying to "help" put the crib together by picking up parts and trying to jam them together like they're Legos or something. He's in that stage where he basically wants to copy every single thing Sam does, so Sam doesn't stop him or anything. At least not yet. Not until he actually starts getting in the way, which will probably happen in like three minutes.

It's okay, though. He now knows from experience that this age goes by way too fast, so he's going to enjoy it while he's still got the chance.

"Did you think of anymore names?" Quinn's barely rocking, and she's got one hand playing with Hunter's hair. He hasn't been feeling well all day and has been running a little bit of a fever, so it's probably good that he's napping some of it off.

Sam shrugs, though, because baby names have kind of been the last thing on his mind lately. "My mom says she likes Savannah."

"Was that going to be the next name in the S-capades if they'd had anymore?"

Sam hadn't even thought about that, but… "Probably."

Quinn just shakes her head, though. "It doesn't fit."

"Fit with what?"

"The other names."

She says this like he's dumb, and he just kind of looks at her because he doesn't really know what she's talking about. Their kids don't have any kind of linked names. Quinn never suggested it, and after being called _S-s-sta-ste-sam _his whole life, Sam wouldn't have been down for it anyway. To this day, he'll answer to his brother's name, his sister's name, or any combination of their names.

"All of them have two syllables," she finally finishes when it's obvious that he's not following without some kind of help. He almost tells her that Jake is only one syllable, but then he realizes he's a dumbass and that his name is actually _Jacob, _so he stops himself before he sounds dumb. (He's about ninety percent sure that his first child was named, at least in part, after Taylor Lautner, even though Julia swore up and down that it was just Biblical). "We can't break that now."

Sam wants to roll his eyes. Like seriously. He hates these kind of hang-ups on names. It's probably because all the kids in his family had to have names that "went together," but he seriously doesn't understand the point. Just name your kids whatever you want to name them- don't worry if they all _fit _or whatever. Just make sure they're not dumb. Like when Quinn was pregnant the first time, she told him she liked E names and randomly suggested Evan, and he had to look at her like she was smoking crack or something and then make sure she realized that that was going to be the kid's _last _name. And no way was he naming a baby Evan Evans. She laughed when she realized what she said and chalked it up to a brain fart, but she's totally serious about this whole two syllable thing.

"Well, what do you like?" he asks, reaching for a screwdriver to start the frame.

"I don't know. Scarlett's cute."

He stops what he's doing and just looks up at her. He hopes she can see how disgusted he is because… for real? "No," he says flatly. "No S names, I take it back." The S is the least of his worries with that.

"Oh, what about Shelby!" She seems excited by that one, and while it's way less offensive to his ears than _Scarlett, _he has to stand his ground.

"I'm pretty sure that falls under S names."

Ethan gets bored with what he's doing and seems way more interested in what Sam's doing now that he's actually using a tool. He gets up and then pushes his way through the crib parts to sit down right in the middle of Sam's lap. Good thing he's little because he doesn't even _attempt _to be careful when plopping down wherever and on _whom_ever he chooses.

Sam lets him help hold the screwdriver and asks, "What do you want to name your sister?"

Ethan thinks about it for a few seconds and then seriously says, "Booger," right before he starts giggling at himself.

Sam just looks up at Quinn who doesn't seem amused in the least. He shrugs because, well…

"It's two syllables."

…

Sam's got Thursday off, so he spends the whole day with Ethan and Hunter.

They just hang out at home for a little while after Quinn leaves with Jake, and he lets them eat cereal in front of the TV and watch as much Nick Jr. as their attention spans can handle (not much). Then he asks what they want to do, and Hunter ignores him and runs off to play in the kitchen. Ethan says he wants to be a snake, and since that's obviously not an option, Sam asks about the zoo instead and gets a super-excited, _"Yes!" _in response.

Going to the zoo on a Thursday is perfect because it's hardly crowded at all. The only people who are there are soccer moms with toddlers and a few school groups. Also, going to the zoo with just the babies is probably the best idea he's had in awhile. It _could _be the worst because handling two toddlers on your own in a very public area sometimes isn't the easiest thing, but the way Sam sees it, this is the best possible scenario. His kids need the zoo. They _love _the zoo. He really likes it, too. Jake? Would roll his eyes nonstop and be in the worst mood ever if they tried to force him to the zoo. Quinn, pregnant and already irritable, would whine and complain about being tired and/or hot so much that they would inevitably leave within an hour of arriving. So yeah, going _without _those two is actually a great idea.

He makes an executive decision not to take the stroller, which may or may not be a really smart idea. But that thing is huge. And both of his kids are more than capable of walking- he doesn't plan on staying there all day, either. If they get too tired, he can either just carry them or rent a stroller because either way is much less hassle than dragging that giant thing around. There's no way Quinn would let them even go _near _a zoo without a stroller, but what she doesn't know can't hurt them. Or can't hurt him anyway- he's the one who would be getting hurt.

It actually goes pretty awesomely. Because believe it or not, his kids can actually behave really freaking well when they want to. And today must be a really good day because they both hold his hand, they don't run away, they hardly whine at all, and they're not even arguing with each other. They hit all the major spots, and both boys get excited over basically everything. Ethan, especially, "loves" every single animal they come across. "I _love_ lions!" "I _love_ giraffes!" "I _love_ snakes!" "I _love_ monkeys!" It's honestly really adorable- his kids are pretty cute.

The most shocking thing happens when they're in the reptile house, and Ethan starts bouncing a little bit. Sam looks at him because he's acting weird, but then Ethan says, "Daddy, I gotta pee!"

This _should _be a miracle. Like seriously, angels should be singing in the background or something because Ethan _never _announces when he has to pee. He's three and a half and still not potty-trained, so for him to actually announce it beforehand is a _really _big step. Unfortunately, they're nowhere close to a bathroom, and getting to one is going to be nothing but a huge hassle. He almost wants to tell Ethan to just go in his pull-up, but that can't be good potty-training advice.

"Can you hold it just for a little while?"

Ethan shakes his head quickly. "No, I gotta pee now!"

Sam knows better than to pass up a good opportunity when he sees one, so he makes a split decision, picks Ethan up and practically starts dragging Hunter out of the reptile house and to the closest restroom. It's pretty disgusting, which is basically standard for any zoo, and when he gets the kids into a stall, he's almost certain that Quinn would have a heart attack if she knew he was letting their child sit on this toilet. But what choice does he have? If they ever want Ethan out of diapers (and trust, they _do), _they need to encourage him no matter what.

Sam cringes a little bit when he actually sits Ethan down on that thing, but he tries not to let it show. And then he wants to groan out loud when nothing happens. Ethan just looks at him, and seriously, Sam's not going to pressure his kid into urinating, but it would be nice if he could just, you know, _go. _

"It won't come out." Ethan sounds totally serious, so Sam just goes along with it.

"Why not?"

He gets a shrug. "It's scared."

It's kind of scary that he can actually have these kinds of conversations with straight faces, probably a sign that he's officially been around kids too long. "Why's it scared?"

Another shrug.

"Well, maybe you can tell it there's nothing to be scared of and to be brave and come out?"

Ethan just hits him with this look that legitimately almost makes him laugh out loud. Sometimes it's crazy how cute his kids are. They're just _funny. _He doesn't think Ethan's going to take his advice, but a few seconds later, they all hear a welcome tinkling sound, and Sam seriously wants to jump up and down because _yes._

"Buddy, you're doing it!" Ethan smiles this giant smile (yes, he comes by it naturally; yes, Sam will find it extremely ironic if his daughter turns out to be the only one without the lips). It's super obvious that he's proud of himself, and Sam can't blame him. They've been trying to potty for a year now, and yeah, they're occasionally successful when they play the sit on the toilet and wait game, but this is seriously the first time Ethan's ever _asked _to go potty and actually _done _it.

Sam lets him finish doing his business and then helps him get his pull-up and pants back on. He gives him a high five because this might not seem major to an outsider, but it feels like the hugest thing in the world at the moment. He decides to press his luck and turns to Hunter. "Do you want to try to potty like E?"

Hunter shakes his head. Then he giggles and obviously changes his mind because he nods. Sam's not sure if he actually has to go, but he decides it doesn't hurt to try at least. He doesn't even consider the infestation of germs on the toilet this time when he helps Hunter get settled. Ethan's still grinning like he just won an Olympic gold medal or something, but Sam's not going to hold it against him. It's a huge achievement.

They stand in the stall waiting for literally ten minutes waiting for Hunter's pee to come out, but it never makes an appearance. Not all that shocking actually, but at least he tried. Ethan's starting to get antsy, so Sam gets Hunter ready again and then tells them both that they can have a treat for being so awesome. Hunter immediately starts screaming for ice cream (literally), but that's way too much dairy for Ethan to handle, so they settle for shaved ice instead. Of course, it turns into a giant mess, and both boys end up with huge purple stains on their shirts, but oh, well.

Sam calls Quinn, so Ethan can deliver his big news, and she answers on the third ring sounding a little too busy for personal calls. But this is a big deal. He tells her to hang on a second and hands the phone to Ethan, "Tell Momma what you did."

Ethan grabs the phone with fingers still sticky from the flavored syrup and excitedly says, "Momma?" like he's so happy to talk to her. "I peed in the big potty!"

He tells her all about it, making sure to point out that _he _was successful but that Hunter was not. He's so excited, and it's honestly really sweet because it's obvious how proud of himself he is. Sam finally takes the phone back, and Quinn asks if Ethan really went on his own with no prompting. The (very) few times Ethan's successfully used the toilet, it's been after a lot of prompting and basically sitting until something eventually happens. So him realizing it and announcing it is _huge._

"Yeah, and then Hunter even wanted to try after that!"

"But he didn't go?"

"Well, no. But we couldn't wait in there forever. It wasn't like the _cleanest _bathroom ever…"

He's surprised that she doesn't comment on that, but she seems as happy and as proud as he is. "That's awesome, though! Maybe it's finally starting to happen!"

"I hope so because I seriously cannot do three." He knows Quinn's not looking forward to that prospect ever, so getting at least one out of diapers is a definite good thing.

"Let me know if he goes again. We should take the kids out for pizza or something to celebrate. They're all doing good stuff right now."

It's true. Ethan with the potty. Hunter at least _trying. _And Jake's been getting nothing but good reports at school for the past few weeks, which is a definite improvement over what he's been getting. Things at home are actually pretty good all the way around, so maybe they _do _need to treat the kids and encourage all of this to continue.

It definitely can't hurt.

…

Things with Quinn and him are not _perfect, _but they are really trying to work things out in like the best way they know how.

The fight they had a couple of weeks ago was honestly the worst one they've ever had. They've argued before and even stopped talking for a couple of days before, but it's always just been over stupid stuff. They've just made each other mad and blown up or been mean to each other or whatever- it's never been over something _serious. _That fight a couple of weeks ago was _very _serious, though.

And it wasn't even like either of them were really at fault.

Sam knows he basically said everything the absolute worst way possible and that even though he was trying to make one point, it was coming across as something totally different. Quinn didn't want to listen and didn't even want to try to understand anything, so she was wrong for that, too. They were both wrong. And both right. But that's what makes fights actually _seriously- _when there's not a "winner" because there's an actual real issue at hand. So that's why things just don't immediately go back to perfect as soon as the fight's over.

But they're trying. They are talking, and Sam thinks he's doing a better job of explaining how he feels and why, and Quinn's making an effort to listen and understand. It's not easy at all because there's still a lot of real issues that they're working through, but they're trying. And a lot of that is just Sam working through his own issues- dealing with something he never made himself deal with before. It's hard.

A lot of it is talking things through with Jake.

Jake's twelve. He doesn't _want _to talk about anything. If it were up to him, he'd be perfectly content to stay alone in his room with the door closed ninety percent of the day, but obviously that's not an option. So while Sam doesn't _force _him to talk about stuff, he does make a real effort to make things as open and comfortable as possible. And he tries to open up as many lines of conversation as possible so that if Jake _does _want to talk about stuff- anything… school, friends, girls, Julia, whatever- that he feels like he can do it.

But Jake's doing a lot better in school, and he's doing better at home, too. He still has his moments where he totally brats out, but for the most part, it seems like he's making a real effort to act better. He's being nicer to his brothers _and _to Sam and Quinn, so that's always a good thing. It's a little worrisome because usually when he suddenly decides to become a saint, it's because he knows he's done something else that's going to land him in trouble when it's discovered. That really doesn't seem to be the case, though, and it really seems like he's just making a real effort to behave better and be nicer and more respectful.

So hopefully that's all it is.

…

They lose the ball game on Saturday, and it sucks because it puts an end to their undefeated streak.

Nobody's in a great mood by the time it's over, but Sam at least tries not to show it because he's got to keep up some kind of semblance that winning's not everything. But seriously, his kids are old enough to know that winning _is _everything, so that whole 'having fun is the most important thing' is BS, and they know it. He has to stick around after the game and talk to the other coach and the refs and stuff, so Jake migrates to the stands where Quinn and the babies are. He's in the same foul mood as the rest of his teammates, but when Sam glances over, he's at least paying attention to whatever Ethan's saying and not rolling his eyes or tuning him out.

Sam wishes he could tune his current conversation out.

He doesn't really know this other coach that well, but he's seen him around a few times. He's new this season, and all Sam can think is that he seems like a world-class douche. These kinds of conversations are standard after every game- the coaches get to talk to the refs and get explanations on any calls they've got questions about, that kind of thing. Sometimes there are legitimate concerns, but for the most part, the refs are pretty fair and their reasoning is pretty obvious. This dude, though, is for real questioning every single negative call that was made against his team. Sam kind of wants to just scream, _"Dude, you won! Shut the fuck up!" _but he doesn't because that's not even the least bit professional.

But he almost does a double-take when Douchey McDoucherton says, "I just think it's pretty obvious that the other team was getting unfair treatment because they've got a few special needs kids."

And it's not like Sam can even try to keep his mouth shut, so he says, "Excuse me?" because he's seriously going to give this idiot a chance to explain what he means.

"I'm just saying, there's a general consensus in the league that some of your players get special treatment because they're…"

"What? Deaf?" Sam raises his eyebrows because _seriously? _"I've got three deaf kids on my team, and they happen to be three of the best players in this whole league."

"Well, of course _you _think that. They're your players."

"Yeah. And you do realize that one over there is my son, too, don't you?" He looks over to where Jake is now playing with something on Quinn's phone while Hunter is stealing his cap and trying to climb onto his back.

"Then I'm sure you can realize how personal bias can influence the way outsiders see certain calls made in favor of your son and his friends."

Sam seriously thinks about punching the guy, but that's probably not the best idea when all three of his kids are sitting just a few feet away. Luckily, the ref steps in anyway and shuts him up.

"All of the children are given the same treatment. Regardless of their hearing ability or anything else. So if you no one has any legitimate complaints, let's wrap this up."

Sam's glad to finish this up because he seriously cannot even formulate words to respond to the other coach. Or at least he can't formulate anything that doesn't have a whole bunch of profanity, and he really tries not to cuss a lot in front of his children. So… yeah.

Hunter abandons trying to climb Jake's back and instead jumps off the bleachers right into Sam's arms the second he gets over to them. Hunter's in a much better mood than the rest of the people who actually realize that a game was lost, so Sam smiles at him and straightens the (much too big) ball cap on his head. Ethan starts tugging at Jake then, and Quinn starts getting their stuff together so they can finally get out of here. Sam kisses her when she stands up and then catches her ear and says, "I seriously want to kill someone right now."

She gives him a look that's obviously questioning what's wrong, but he just shakes his head because he's not about to go into it right now in front of the kids. But seriously.

He really wants to kill that idiot.

…

One of Quinn's best friends from New York is getting married, and the invitation has a special note tucked into that's basically threatening her to be there _or else._

They really can't afford a trip to New York. Hotels alone are super expensive- plus, they'd actually have to get there some way. Even if they went alone, plane tickets are way over-priced, and if they actually took the kids… There's just no way they can afford all that.

But Sam's not going to be the one to say all that. If Quinn wants to go, they'll make it happen somehow- it's just going to suck trying to fit it into their already too tight budget. He hates not being able to afford stuff, and it's times like this that he really wishes he made more money. But he knows better. Hard lessons learned early in life. He knows to just be thankful for what you have because it's always more than a lot of people.

But that doesn't make it any easier.

…

Church is a disaster.

Ethan's in one of his moods and is being an absolute terror all morning long. He gets in trouble seriously like three times before they even leave the house, and then he's still getting threatened in the car. Jake can't keep his eyes open to save his life, and Hunter's just all around whiney. It's seriously a blessing when they can finally drop the kids off at Sunday School, but it's short-lived because soon enough, the service is over, and they're back in the car heading to his parents.

Stacy's home for the weekend, so the kids are happy about that at least. She's literally two weeks from college graduation, which is just freaking _insane _because it's Stacy, and she's supposed to be a baby. She's been dying her hair this dark auburn color for two years now, and Sam was _just _starting to get used to it. But she's apparently had a change of heart and shows up back with her original blonde. She looks way more relaxed than she's looked in forever, though- probably since she started college. She's been on an academic scholarship, and she's had to bust her ass to keep it. She probably _is _relaxed now that she's officially in the homestretch.

The hard part will come next- finding a job and getting started in it. But nobody wants to burst her bubble.

She doesn't really pay anyone else the same kind of courteous, though, when they're at dinner, and she's getting grilled about post-graduation plans. They've already had this conversation a hundred times, but now that it's actually finally happening, there seems to be more of a real urgency to it, and Sam kind of wants to tell both his parents to back off when they're asking her over and over again what she's going to do if _this_ happens or how she's going to handle it if _that_ doesn't work out.

Stacy is obviously getting more and more frustrated by the second when she gives the same answer over and over again. She doesn't _know _what she's doing because most schools aren't even hiring right now, and it's not like there are a ton of openings anywhere. She's just going to play it by ear and see what comes up. Really, there's not a whole lot else she _can _do.

Sam rolls his eyes when his mom says, "You need to have some kind of backup. What are you going to do if you can't find a job at all, and you waste all summer waiting for one. You need to find at least a somehow decent job now. You're not going to pay your bills on barista tips. Without your housing budget, you're going to all kinds of new bills."

And then Stacy drops the bombshell to kill all bombshells.

"Well, I'm moving in with Tyler in July."

Sam doesn't say anything. He glances over at Quinn and sees that she's suddenly very interested in cutting up the food on Hunter's plate. He glances at his parents and sees exactly what he expects to see…

"I'm sorry, _what?" _No one ever said their dad was rational, especially not when it comes to Stacy. Sam's not even remotely shocked that he looks on the verge of murdering someone.

Stacy twists around in her seat a little bit but manages to stand her ground. "It's going to save on bills, and we're probably going to get married soon anyway, so-"

"_Married?" _This time it's Mom speaking in total disbelief, and Sam would be lying if he said he didn't choke a little at that word, too. No way in hell is Stacy getting married to _anyone _right now. She's been dating this Tyler kid for about two years now, and honestly, she could do worse. But that doesn't mean they have permission to get _married._

"I don't mean like _tomorrow," _Stacy rolls her eyes. "But eventually."

Sam can tell his dad is about two steps from a heart attack, which is just too dramatic for everyone involved. But at least it won't be unprovoked. "You are too young to be moving in with some boy." It's obviously taking a whole lot of effort to keep his voice even, and Stacy just rolls her eyes.

"We've been dating for two years, and you love him."

That's possibly stretching it a little bit. Nobody hates Tyler, but expecting Stacy's crazy if she thinks their dad is ever going to _love _somebody who undoubtedly spends a good portion of their time trying to sleep with his daughter. Of course, there's also a good possibility that their dad has conned himself into believing that nobody is, ever has, or ever will sleep with Stacy and that she's some kind of perfect angel. Sam knows better.

He might be protective, but he's not dumb.

And whatever, he tries not to think about that because it's weird, and she shouldn't be old enough to move in with a guy or graduate college or so any of that stuff. But she is. And it's definitely a little depressing.

"We're just doing it to save money." She obviously knows that she needs to push certain issues and hide all other issues. She never should have slipped with the marriage thing, so she's clearly doing her best to bury it under other pros. "Neither of us have a real job yet, and we can't afford to live by ourselves. This way, we can split everything."

"How many bedrooms?"

"_Dad." _And Stacy's getting frustrated and slightly whiney. She looks right at Sam with raised eyebrows that clearly say _help me, _but he just picks up his water glass and takes the longest drink possible because he's not getting involved in this one. He's spent almost his whole life covering for Stacy or taking up for her, but she's on her own with this one. She's twenty-two, after all. If she's old enough to have a live-in boyfriend, she's old enough to deal with their dad. He glances over at his mom to see if she's going to come to Stacy's defense, but she has obviously decided that Ethan's plate needs the same super-chopped treatment that Quinn's _still _applying to Hunter's. Jake's just watching the whole thing with a slightly confused look on his face.

"I just don't understand why you can't continue living with the same roommates you have now. Or one of your other friends." And Sam has to hand it to his dad that he's actually making semi-sense with that point, but Stacy, of course, has an immediate defense.

"They're leaving. _Everybody's _leaving after graduation."

That's obviously a lie. Sam doubts very much that every single girl Stacy knows is moving away from Louisville the day after their graduation ceremony, but he doesn't call her out on it.

She calls _him _out later for not standing up for her.

"Thanks for the support! It really means a lot."

"Sarcasm doesn't even work on you."

She has him cornered by his car after she follows him out on his way to get a new shirt to replace the one Hunter somehow managed to cover in way more chocolate icing than should possibly fit on one cupcake. She's got her arms crossed and this look on her face that lets him know she's being totally serious. "Dad's crazy, and you know it."

"Yeah, which is exactly why you shouldn't drop stuff like that on him out of nowhere in the middle of Sunday dinner."

"It's not even a big deal!"

"Not to _you."_

"Not to any sane person."

"Dad's not sane."

Stacy rolls her eyes. "We've been dating for two years."

"I know that. But Dad's under the delusion that by _dating, _you mean studying together and occasionally holding hands in the dining hall. You moving in together kind of ruins that illusion for him."

She immediately goes on the defense, which isn't surprising in the least, but that doesn't mean it's any less annoying. She can still very much display her youngest child characteristics when she wants to. "I really don't think you can talk when you brought a pregnant girl home the summer after _freshman year. _But of course, there's some double standard because I'm a girl."

And now it's _Sam's _turn to roll his eyes because… "Please. If you think I didn't get my ass chewed up, swallowed, and spit back out after that, _you're _the crazy one." And it's the truth, too. He honest to God thought his mom was going to have a stroke and that his dad was going to bust some kind of blood vessel in his brain from screaming so much. It was for real the _worst _thing he's ever had to sit through.

Stacy just still looks kind of pissed off, but she'll get over it. And their dad will get over it, too. But Stace is insane if she thinks that's going to happen any time soon.

If she thinks that, she must have seriously slept through the first twenty-two years of her life.

…

A/N: Thanks for all the reviews on the last chapter! This one was way less angsty, but the angst'll be thrown back in, don't worry…


	6. Chapter 6

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 6**

…

He's never felt older than he does sitting in the audience watching _Stacy _graduate _college._

It occurs to him that he's never actually _been _older than he has right at that second, so maybe the feeling's not all that crazy. But that's just too much to think about right now and kind of makes his head hurt. Not that it already feels great to begin with because _Stacy _is graduating _college. _He seriously doesn't know when she moved on from Barbies to this, but it feels like he blinked, and she's all grown up. He's probably being way too sentimental, but she's his baby sister, and he really feels like she still needs to be a baby.

But she's not, and when she comes squeezing her way through the crowd after the ceremony, she's all smiles and cheerfulness. She must not realize that she's making everybody else feel ancient and somewhat depressed in the process. Well, not _everybody. _Stevie doesn't seem to be feeling too old, but that's probably to do with the fact that he was just in the same spot two years ago. The kids aren't too interested, either, because some random person walking by with a bag of chips set off a chain reaction of whining in the little ones about being hungry and then hot and then hungry again and then bored. Jake's too busy texting to even notice what's going on around him, so Stacy takes it upon herself to stomp on his foot and demand that he hug her. Jake looks pissed and rolls his eyes, but he eventually lets her hug him.

That relationship is a weird one. They've always argued like crazy. It's almost ridiculous how much they can still argue to this day, but it was even worse when they were younger. Jake's appearance literally disrupted everything in Stacy's life and turned her status as family baby totally upside down. She had no use at all for him as a baby except to complain about how much he cried or bugged her or how badly his diaper could smell. Even though she was ten when Jake was born, Sam still counts it as a miracle that no one ever opened the dryer to find an infant flying around on the fluff cycle. It only got worse when they learned how to fight with each other, and there is no question in Sam's mind that Jake probably bothered Stacy on purpose a lot of times just to get her angry. He probably _still _does that.

And yet, Sam can't help but feel that if Jake was ever in some real kind of trouble that Stacy would probably be the first person he'd go to. It's just _that _kind of relationship.

In fact, she has him in a choke-hold with an arm around his neck the whole time they're waiting on a table for lunch. He looks like he's about to fall asleep anyway (surprise, surprise), so maybe it's good that somebody's holding him up. When they get seated, Jake keeps his head ducked over the menu when the server comes to the table, which is pretty standard considering the fact that he's recently started doing everything in his power to avoid having to communicate with strangers. He's so self-conscious lately, about _everything, _but especially about that. It's worse now that he's old enough that people in stores and restaurants address him directly and think he should be able to speak for himself, so he plays this game a lot where he avoids any and all eye contact so that nobody talks to him. Stacy's beside him and actually orders for him, and then she and Jake start having some conversation that nobody else pays attention to while Sam listens to his brother tell everyone about his boss and how he literally has to be Satan's child to be as evil as he is.

It's all pretty normal until Ethan starts _screaming _across the table- "Stacy! Stacy! Stacy!"- over and over until she finally acknowledges him, only to have him calmly say, "I like your dress," with a sweet smile like he didn't just interrupt an entire restaurant's worth of conversation.

…

Mother's Day should be really fun, right?

Yeah, not so much when you've got three kids all trying to get their hands into it. Really, Jake is just hungry and trying to "help" so that he can eat first. Ethan and Hunter are super excited and very likely don't even know why, but they're both trying to do everything they can to get right into the middle of things.

Breakfast in bed should _not _be this much trouble.

It's pretty dumb considering the fact that they're making so much noise that there's absolutely _no _way that Quinn's not already awake. Luckily, she's playing along and staying in bed, but it's kind of ridiculous. After the second juice glass "slips" and shatters on the kitchen tile, Sam goes for a new game plan. He keeps Hunter (who, surprisingly, seems to be the least destructive) and tells Jake to help Ethan make a card- the fact that he already bought a card is completely irrelevant. Hopefully this'll cut down on at least _some _of the problems.

He and Hunter finish breakfast- well, _he _finishes breakfast; Hunter gets bored and starts zooming a Hot Wheels car around the kitchen floor. Sam gets the food on a plate and realizes he probably should have gotten some flowers or something, but seriously, he took all three kids to the mall to pick out a gift, and that was disaster enough. He probably shouldn't have waited until the night before, but stopping anywhere else for flowers after that was just not happening. Oh, well. Hopefully Quinn will understand.

He goes into the living room to check on the other kids and finds Ethan pouting and Jake leaned over a makeshift card with a marker in his hand. He doesn't know what's going on, but he gets filled in pretty quickly because Ethan's always good for tattling and filling in any blanks.

"Jake won't let me help!"

Sam kind of has to fight not to roll his eyes, but he manages to refrain. Instead, he asks Jake why he won't let Ethan help and gets a defensive response that Ethan doesn't know any letters and that he's dumb.

"Don't call him dumb." Sam grabs another marker and hands it to Ethan. "Let Jake do the front, and you can do the back." Ethan looks appeased by this, and Jake rolls his eyes but doesn't argue. Sam has a quick second thought and adds, "You _only _draw on the paper. If you draw anywhere else, you're gonna be in trouble." Ethan nods like he understands, and Sam seriously hopes he does because he just doesn't want to deal with that kind of mess right now. He tells Jake to watch him, but Jake barely acknowledges him and goes right back to whatever he's writing on the card.

He's just about to reiterate this when there's a giant crash in the kitchen.

Sam forgets about whatever argument he's supposed to be refereeing and literally runs back to the kitchen. The plate he just put together is in about twenty pieces on the floor, and all of the food is scattered everywhere. Hunter is sitting on all fours on the counter looking scared to death, and Sam seriously does not even know how he got up there considering there's child-proofing on every single cabinet in this room, but all the kids have always been climbers, so it's not shocking. But _shit._

"_Hunter." _He can't help the exasperated sigh because seriously? This is not happening right now. He literally feels like he wants to cry.

Hunter _does _cry, and tears start leaking out of his eyes a second later. "Sorry!" He starts crying even harder, and Sam tries really hard not to be mad. He knows it was just an accident, but that doesn't mean it makes any of this any better.

Ethan comes running a second later, and Sam grabs him right before he runs into the kitchen because there's glass everywhere. He picks him up and sets him on the counter beside Hunter and tells them both to sit there before he starts picking up the food and throwing it in the trash. Jake shows up a couple of minutes later and starts helping without being asked, so that's nice. He holds the dustpan while Sam sweeps up the broken plate, and they get it about halfway cleaned up when Quinn finally shows up.

She apparently can't handle not knowing what's going on anymore because she sneaks in with a little smile and obviously deduces exactly what's going on. Sam just raises his eyebrows and dumps the last of the glass into the trash before shrugging a little bit.

"We tried."

"Hunter broke your breakfast!" Ethan wastes no time giving his own explanation, which just sets Hunter off all over again. He's crying and saying he's sorry, but Quinn just laughs a little bit.

"Honey, it's okay." She lifts Hunter off the counter, and he immediately ducks his head onto her shoulder. He's still crying, but she rubs his back and bounces him a little bit. He's very much still a baby when he wants to be, so it's going to be interesting to see how he reacts when the actual baby arrives.

Jake hands over the card and gets a hug, which sets Ethan off screaming that he didn't get to help, and basically it's just a normal morning of screaming, crying kids. But Quinn's smiling, so maybe something's going right.

…

"Sam." He's asleep, and he's not even sure he's actually hearing anything. But then he gets it again. _"Sam."_

He forces himself to wake up because Quinn's in his ear saying his name, and that usually means that she either really wants to get naked _right now _(pregnancy sex drive is the _best) _or that she is hungry and needs him to come up with whatever random food she happens to be craving. Obviously, he's hoping for the first option, but he needs to be awake for either one.

But it turns out to be neither.

He blinks at her, surprised that it's still really, really dark. He doesn't know what time it is, but it can't even be _close _to time to wake up. It takes his eyes a second to adjust, and then he sees Quinn leaning up on one elbow staring him down.

"Why is it so _hot?" _She's seriously whining, like literally sounds just like their three year old. Sam can't decide if that's cute or annoying, but he doesn't really think about it when he realizes that it _is _really freaking hot.

"Maybe the air needs to be turned up." He half-expects Quinn to argue with him because they've honestly had an argument before about whether getting the house cooler involves turning the air up or down, but she doesn't. She just pulls her hair away from her neck and lets out a really dramatic sigh. He knows that's his cue to get up and go fix the problem, but he seriously hasn't even gotten his eyes all the way open yet.

But Quinn's pregnant, only like a week away from her third trimester. He knows better than to argue.

He does his best not to let out any kind of audible grumbles or anything as he stumbles out of the room and into the hallway. He'd like to know why Quinn felt the need to wake him up for this when she could have saved time by just getting up herself. But whatever, he's sure as hell not going to ask her because he has no desire to have her wrath thrown at him for something as stupid as this. It's super dark, so he has to fumble around until he finds the hallway light switch, and then he literally wants to groan out loud at how freaking bright it is. The air's already set on 67, which is cooler than it probably needs to be, but when he starts messing with it, nothing changes- there's no familiar click and low buzz that lets him know the air has kicked on. And…

"_Fuck."_

He wants to punch the thermostat, but he doesn't. He keeps jabbing at the buttons, trying to make something work, but it doesn't. Something's busted- the unit itself, the thermostat, something important- something he probably doesn't know how to fix and something that's probably going to cost way too much to repair. So great. That's just fucking _great._

He can't do anything about it right now, but he stops in Jake's room and in the babies' room and opens up their windows. None of them give any indication that they notice his presence at all, but it's almost kind of funny to see that they've all somehow rid themselves of any and all covers while they're asleep, obviously adapting to the fact that it is seriously hot in this house. It's kind of ridiculous that it got so hot this fast, especially considering that it's only May, but that's what sucks about this house. It's old, so all the heating and cooling stuff is a bitch.

Speaking of a bitch… (no, not really- he loves her for super real, but sometimes he could do without the attitude these hormones produce). Quinn's sitting up looking more pissed than when he left her. She's got a lamp on, so he can see the look on her face, and it's not happy. Obviously she knows the air's not on, and she's waiting for some kind of explanation.

"Something's broken."

"Something _what?"_

He shrugs because he's not some HVAC tech or something. All he knows how to do is mess with the thermostat, and when that doesn't work, he's basically SOL. "Something with the air. I don't know what."

"Can you fix it?"

"Quinn, I don't even know what's _wrong." _He shakes his head as he moves over to open the window behind the bed. "I don't know how to fix it."

Quinn looks like she's about to start whining, and he literally has to shove the window open because it's sticking like crazy. There's a good chance she's going to cuss him out or something, so he just waits for it. He's kind of surprised when she doesn't.

"Can you bring the fan in here?"

"What fan?"

"The one Jake had for camp."

Sam just shakes his head because… "I don't even know where that thing _is."_

"It's in the garage closet. You're the one who put it there."

"Quinn…"

She just gives him this look that's half-pouty/half-_do what the hell I say or suffer the consequences. _"Please? It's so hot. What if Clara has a heat stroke?"

"Who the hell is Clara?"

"Your daughter."

He just shakes his head because… no. No. Just no.

"Please?" She pushes her lip out a little and gives him what's obviously supposed to be some kind of pitiful look or something. He's going to give into her one way or another, so he just rolls his eyes.

"Fine. But I hope Violet Ockleman is out there and sees me in my underwear because I am not putting clothes on."

Violet Ockleman is the recently divorced ex-trophy wife who lives across the street. She was making a habit of flirting with Sam long before she got divorced, and that hasn't changed at all. Quinn hates her and never misses an opportunity to badmouth her or call her some variation of the word whore. Right now, though, she just rolls her eyes.

"If Violet Ockleman is outside and happens to be close enough to our house to be able to see inside the garage at 3:30 in the morning, I give you permission to have sex with her."

Sam just raises his arms in a half-shrug and shakes his head again. It's hot as crap in the garage, and he's not ashamed to admit that he lets out a string of cuss words when he sees the hugest effing spider in existence weaving a web in the corner of the storage closet. The garage door is up, but he doesn't see anyone, much less Violet, creeping around his house. He just grabs the fan and drags it back inside, blowing the dust off of it because, believe it or not, he doesn't _actually _want his pregnant wife to go into some kind of allergic fit when this thing's turned on.

"You are the best ever!" Quinn practically claps when he shows up with a scowl and a fan and goes about plugging it into the only open outlet in the whole damn room. "Clara says, 'Thank you, Daddy.'"

"I don't know who Clara is, but she shouldn't be calling me Daddy." He flips the on switch, and a huge gust of air shoots out immediately. It feels amazing.

"That's perfect." Quinn's all happy smiles now, so he figures it can't hurt to press his luck.

"You should thank me."

She gives him a suspicious/innocent look and says. "And how should I do that?"

"You could take your clothes off."

But Quinn just shoots him a sinister smile and says, "It is too hot for that."

And he rolls his eyes and says, "Shocker," right before he shifts his pillow and lays back down.

"It is _definitely _too hot for _that."_

It takes him a few seconds to realize and accept that she just made _that _joke, and he kind of stares at her in shock for a few seconds before shaking his head in disbelief. "You are perverted."

"Just FYI, it's _always _going to be too hot for that, so don't even think about it." She leans over real fast and gives him a quick kiss before jerking her eyebrows up just slightly.

Too late because he's definitely already thinking about it.

He grabs her before she's able to get away and kisses her because even if she's not into _that, _there's a good possibility she'll give into some other stuff. After all, she woke him up in the middle of the night to get a fan out of the garage, so she might find it in her heart to at least reward him with at least a _little _something. She lets him kiss her for real, so that's a good sign. And she doesn't whine about the temperature when he lets one of his hands slide down over her hip and pull her a little closer. So yeah, so far, so good.

But then they both hear their bedroom door open, and Quinn shoots him a quick glare before pushing him away. God, their kids don't know how to freaking knock. They both look over to see Ethan standing in the doorway looking tired and more than a little out of it.

"E?" Sam says his name because judging by the non-ironic look of confusion on his son's face, he's a little concerned that they'll ever actually make it through this conversation.

But Ethan snaps out of it. His voice is really low and mostly pitiful when he says, "I don't feel good."

"Come here." Quinn motions him over and helps him up onto the bed. He immediately curls into her, but she puts a hand to his forehead and frowns at Sam. "He's really hot."

He wants to point out that it's approximately 589288 degrees in their house at the moment, but he can tell she means hot as in feverish. She runs a hand over Ethan's hair and asks him what hurts.

"My face…" He lets out this really pitiful cough right after he says it.

"Look, go with Daddy, and he'll get you some medicine to make you feel better."

Sam could point out that he _just _got back in bed and that it's her turn, but he doesn't because he's not going to complain about getting his kid some medicine if he's sick. Ethan moves from cuddling Quinn right over to wrapping his arms around Sam's neck and making his face disappear into his shirt. Sam stands up, bringing Ethan with him, and he can definitely feel that he's warm in a way that has nothing to do with the temperature of the room. He sets him down on the counter when they get to the kitchen, and Sam grabs the Children's Tylenol from the cabinet and measures out the right amount for a three year old. Ethan only whines a little bit about taking it, but he swallows it without too much hassle.

He _looks _sick.

Sam decides to do him a solid and pulls his pajama shirt over his head. He knows he's hot and that if he starts sweating the fever off, extra clothes are just going to make him uncomfortable. But it's a little jarring when he picks Ethan up again and can feel the skin of his stomach and back because it's more than just a little warm. It's _hot._

"Daddy, I _hurt."_

Sam kind of wants to cry because Ethan is the funny attention-seeker- not the one who sounds sad and pained and all of this. He rubs his back a little and kisses the top of his head when Ethan once again hides his face. "I know, buddy. But this medicine will make you feel better, okay?" He gets a tiny little nod. "You wanna sleep with me and Momma and the fan?"

They go back to the bedroom, and Sam sets Ethan down carefully and lets him once again curl up with Quinn who's lying down again. Sam readjusts the fan to make sure it's going to hit the bed completely and then climbs in on the other side of Ethan.

So maybe he got cock-blocked by a three year old. He still kisses him and his mom and tells them both he loves them. Because he does.

…

Turns out the medicine doesn't actually work so well.

Ethan's still got a fever, and when Quinn takes his temperature, it's 103 degrees. That's not _crazy _high, but it's still enough to mean they need to keep a pretty close eye on it. He hates asking his mom to watch the kids when they're sick, so he calls in and stays home with them. Quinn can't because Jake's class is actually taking a field trip to the museum today, and she's kind of in charge of it. So she and Jake take off at their normal time, and Sam's got two barely awake toddlers on his hands. It sucks to say, but it's actually a lot easier to take care of them when one is sick. Ethan clearly doesn't feel well and basically refuses to be put down for even a second- Sam has to literally pry his arms away from his neck just so he can take two minutes to get dressed. Hunter's also easier than usual, just because he normally feeds so heavily off of Ethan. If Ethan's subdued- even if it's because he's sick- Hunter is way more likely to be calm, too.

Ethan's whiny and whimpery all day, which isn't really surprising at all, but Sam still feels really bad for him. As crazy as Ethan is on a normal day and as easy as it is to handle him when he's like this… it's still just sad. Sam tries to get him to laugh all day, tells him jokes, tickles him, talks in funny voices- all the stuff that normally works. But nothing. He gives him Tylenol and tries to force feed him Pedialyte. He's only somewhat successful because Ethan spends more time whining than actually drinking.

It's still _very _hot in the house, even with all the windows open. Sam brings the fan into the living room where he and the kids are and manages to make a phone call to get someone out to look at the air conditioner. The earliest anybody can come is in three days, which _sucks, _but it's not like he can spend all day calling around trying to find somebody else. Not when he's got two little ones to take care of anyway.

Quinn calls him when the field trip's over and asks if he thinks Ethan needs to go to the doctor. His temperature hasn't gone down at all, and he's still just saying his face hurts, so it's kind of hard to tell.

Quinn decides that _kind of hard to tell _means yes and tells him that she'll call and see if the pediatrician can fit him in.

…

So that's how they end up at the doctor's office with two kids, one of which isn't sick and refuses to just take a nap, which is what they're going for.

Hunter decides instead that he's going to destroy the waiting room and take every single toy out of the toy box in the corner. There are other kids helping him, so it's not like he's the only destructive thing running around, but still. Ethan hasn't changed his course, though, and Sam's pretty sure that by the time the night is over, he's going to have permanent finger indentions on the back of his neck because Ethan will not let go.

"How was the field trip?"

"Oh, fine, except for the fact that Jake apparently thinks he needs to show off in front of his friends by being really disrespectful." Quinn's thumbing through an old issue of Parenting Magazine, but it's very obvious that she's not actually reading anything.

"What did he do?"

She shrugs a little bit. "Nothing in particular. He was just extra rude and wouldn't follow directions from anyone- me or the teachers. I know he's just doing it to show out, but I don't appreciate it."

"Did you say anything to him about it?"

She shakes her head. "No, that would've just made it worse, I'm sure. I'll talk to him tonight."

Sam lets out a little frustrated sigh. Jake's been doing so much better lately, so it really sucks to hear something like this.

"He was tired, too," Quinn adds because she can't help defending Jake no matter what. "He didn't sleep very well because he was hot." She always does this, makes excuses and tries to rationalize stuff when Jake starts acting up.

"He knows better than to act like that."

Before they can get anymore into it, a nurse comes out and calls Ethan's name. Sam stands up with him, and Quinn goes over to wrangle Hunter away from the toys. He refuses to put down a toy skillet, but the nurse just smiles and says it's okay, so they let him take it back to the examination room.

She asks all the normal questions, symptoms, allergies, etc. She sticks a thermometer in Ethan's ear and checks his temp (103.6), and she tries to get Ethan to smile but just fails a lot. Then she tells them that the doctor will be in soon and leaves.

Hunter is banging the plastic skillet against the floor and then decides to bang on every surface he can find, including the examination table where Sam's still holding Ethan. Ethan, apparently, is very annoyed by this banging because he moves willingly for the first time in forever and smacks his little brother right in the shoulder. Of course, this sets Hunter off crying, and it's basically Quinn who comes to the rescue with a pack of crayons she randomly has in her purse and a couple of sheets of copy paper she steals off the printer on the counter. It works because both of the kids are instantly distracted, and even Ethan, who hasn't wanted to do _anything _all day, moves so that he can spread out his drawing on the table. And amazingly, both kids keep calm until the doctor shows up.

Ethan barely pays her any attention, and Sam tries to get him to stop drawing, but Dr. Maynard says it's fine and to let him keep going. It actually works because Ethan doesn't start screaming or whining when the doctor starts her examination. She does all the normal stuff, listens to his chest and lungs, feels for swollen glands, peeks into his ears. And that's when she nods.

"That's a pretty nasty ear infection."

Great. Just what they need. Still, it could be worse. But really? Ear infections are the worst in little kids, so it sucks. But then Dr. Maynard surprises them a little.

"Does he always switch hands like that?"

At first Sam's confused, but then he sees that she's looking down at Ethan's picture and the way he's drawing it. He switches hands while drawing, sometimes even holding a crayon in each hand. That's just how he draws, though- it's normal for him.

"He hasn't shown any hand dominance at all?" Dr. Maynard looks up from the drawing, and Quinn shakes her head.

"No, he usually just uses both."

The doctor nods and then says, "How does he do with his numbers and letters?"

Sam feels a little awkward because, to be honest, Ethan's not up to where he should be on that. Hunter will sit and sing the alphabet song and count all day if someone is working with him, but Ethan zones out way too fast and doesn't seem to have any desire to learn that kind of stuff. His attention span isn't great, and it's not like they can really _force _him to learn this kind of stuff or anything. Quinn basically gives the rundown of this and is right on the same page as Sam.

"He doesn't really pay attention to any of those things when we try to work on them. He just finds something else to do or talk about instead." Sam can tell she's confused as to why they're being asked these questions when they came in for an ear infection. "Is there something wrong?"

"No. Not necessarily." Well, _that _sounds awesome. "I've just noticed a few things, in the way he speaks and pronounces words. He flips syllables around a lot or adds extra sounds to words."

Sam's confused, too. "He's three. They're not supposed to be speaking perfectly, are they?" Maybe he's a little defensive because he doesn't honestly think there's anything wrong with the way Ethan speaks. Yeah, sometimes he mixes up words or mispronounces things, but he's just a kid. And anyway, Sam has no trouble understanding him- he doesn't even notice half the time.

Dr. Maynard shakes her head. "No, and it may just be normal verbal development. But there are early symptoms that you can see in kids around this age that might indicate different types of learning disabilities and things like that."

"What? Like ADD?" Because that would explain so much.

But then Sam feels like a _total _dumbass when Dr. Maynard says, "No, probably not. Something more like dyslexia maybe."

He doesn't say anything, but he looks over at Quinn who's got this look on her face like she can't possibly comprehend what's being said to her. And Sam kind of just feels like shit when the follow up question is, "Is there any family history of that?"

Quinn doesn't answer, so a couple of seconds pass, and Sam says, "Me," and kind of blinks up at the doctor.

"Oh, well, that's fairly common then. Some studies put the chances as high as fifty percent if one of the parents is dyslexic. You can't really accurately diagnose children at this age, but like I said, there are early signs of it. It may turn out to be nothing at all, but I can give you some information if you want."

…

There's not much said on the way home.

They stop and get a prescription filled, and both of the kids end up falling asleep in their car seats when they head over to the school to get Jake. Sam doesn't really know what to say because he feels like some kind of failure or that it's his fault or something. He knows it's just genetics, but he knows how bad dyslexia sucks, too. Especially when you're a kid.

It made his life hell when he was younger, especially before he was diagnosed. Kids called him stupid, teachers accused him of not trying hard enough. It made everything harder, literally _everything. _Sometimes it _still _screws with him, and even though he's gotten a lot better at just hiding his issues with reading and writing, it's still sometimes difficult. It sucks when he goes to read to his kids and has to start over at the top of the page because he can't keep the words focused enough to even know where he is sometimes.

And he doesn't want Ethan to go through any of that.

Jake's obviously got it bad enough. He doesn't want to watch Ethan struggle with something, too, even if it's something that's obviously less serious than total hearing loss. It still sucks, and he feels like it's all his fault.

And he really, really doesn't want this to be true.

…

A/N: Sorry for the delay in this- things have been crazy. Thanks to everyone who is reviewing!


	7. Chapter 7

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 7**

…

Jake makes it through sixth grade and manages to pass.

It's crazy to think of him being in seventh grade when it seems like he was just starting kindergarten yesterday, but that's basically the way everything feels the older Sam gets. He feels way older than he probably should sometimes, but it's crazy watching your kids grow up in front of you and not realizing it's happening until something happens and it just smacks you right in the face. The truth is, though, that Jake's _not _in kindergarten anymore. He's nearly a teenager, and that's just scary. But when he _was _in kindergarten, their life was so different. It was just the two of them, living in a really small apartment, just trying to make it day by day. Sometimes it'd been overwhelming, and sometimes Sam wanted to give up and just cry. Raising a kid by himself was really hard at times, but it was so worth it. He wouldn't even trade the _worst _day for all the money in the world.

Sam picks Jake up on the last day of school and takes him to dinner because he really _is _trying to make sure everything's okay. It's been awhile since Mr. Fischer died and everything, but Sam's still worried that Jake's not dealing with or not having all his questions answered or something. Plus, he knows from firsthand experience that it's really important at that age to just have one-on-one time. When he was Jake's age, Stevie and Stacy were close to the same ages that Ethan and Hunter are now, so Sam knows that it sucks having to constantly be surrounded by younger kids and not being able to get away from them no matter what. He remembers his own dad taking him out, just to lunch or even hunting a couple of times- it meant a lot.

He wants Jake to have that, too.

They go to this place that has kickass burgers, but the thing about Jake is that he really doesn't eat too much of anything, save a few very select things. So instead of splurging and getting one of these awesome burgers (and it's definitely splurging- Sam's going to have to double his workout to make up for it), Jake just wants a grilled cheese with bacon on the side and asks if he can get green beans instead of fries. To be fair, most kids make way worse eating choices than that, but it's still such a weird combination and not really balanced in the least. But whatever, if Jake wants to eat green beans instead of French fries, Sam's not going to complain. Sam orders a burger, skips the fries, and gets water to compensate for the amount of unnecessary grease he's about to ingest. Jake wants Dr. Pepper, and he lets him have it even though pop is like the _worst _invention in the world, and his youngest kids have never even tasted it.

But after they order, they just kind of stare at each other.

So Sam asks if he's glad to be out for summer and gets a vague kind of nod in response. This isn't surprising given the fact that getting Jake to give real answers to questions is like pulling teeth these days. He's honestly surprised when Jake answers and says Kaley's going to Japan when he asks the next question of whether any of his friends have cool plans. Sam's impressed, mainly because he's never even been out of the country, save one spring break trip to Cancun freshman year (where Jake was very likely conceived, ironically). He also doesn't miss that the very first person Jake mentions is Kaley, and that's interesting. He wants to point this out, but he doesn't.

Jake's known Kaley since they were two- they've literally grown up together. Sam wouldn't call Kaley Jake's _best _friend, but she's definitely been a constant in his life. They used to "like" each other when they were little, and Kaley once told Sam that Jake was her boyfriend when he was helping out at a first grade bake sale. Obviously they've both grown up since then, but it's kind of cute that she's his go-to response when asked about "any" of his friends.

She's a sweet little girl, and her parents are really nice, too. Sam asks why they're going to Japan, and Jake says Kaley's dad has a friend who lives there. Then he says Kaley promised to bring back presents, which is both sweet and funny, especially if she didn't ask her parents before getting permission to make that kind of present, but whatever. It's cute. Sam's careful not to let on with just how _cute _it is because Jake would just freak out and get embarrassed, and obviously that's about the last thing that needs to happen.

But then Jake asks why _they _never go on vacation.

To be fair, the last vacation Sam went on was his honeymoon, and Jake wasn't invited on that trip. The last real vacation _Jake _went on… he was probably like four. It's just hard, though, getting work and school schedules matched up- getting the _money _together. They honestly haven't been able to afford to go anywhere, and it sucks because he'd like for his kids to get away and see new places. Jake went to Florida when he was little, but since then, the only places he's had the fortune of seeing have been Cincinnati, Nashville, and _Lima. _

So, yeah. It sucks.

…

He does the math on his own.

In all honesty, it could very likely be wrong. Math is not and never has been his strong point. But hopefully he's at least mostly right- if he's not, he's sure Quinn will figure it out and let him know.

They've got tuition help now, thanks to the money Jake's grandmother gave him. Plus, it's summer, so they don't even have school bills coming in. Usually, they spend the summer saving up, so the first couple of months into the school year aren't as bad, but with the extra money they've got specifically for that purpose, there should be a little money left to play with this summer. Really, they should save it, considering they have a new baby coming in August, but Sam can't help thinking that maybe this is something they all need.

The wedding invitation from Quinn's friend is stuck to the refrigerator with a magnet, and Sam sees it every time he's in the kitchen. He knows she wants to go, but he also knows she's not going to make a big deal about it because she thinks they can't afford it. But if they _could _afford it… He knows how happy that would make her.

He checks online, and hotels are ridiculously expensive. But if they drive instead of fly, they'll be saving a ton on transportation even with gas prices going crazy. Of course, driving means spending a lot of hours in a car with three kids, but maybe it won't be terrible if they leave late and just drive all night. Maybe the kids will just sleep in the backseat. Maybe. Probably not. But maybe.

He talks to Quinn about it that night after the kids are all in bed. She's trying and failing to paint her toenails, and she keeps grumbling about being fat and hating it. He just goes for it because maybe getting her mind off of her belly will make her feel better.

"So, I was thinking maybe we could take the kids to New York and go to Danielle's wedding…"

She stops what she's doing and looks at him. "Sam, we can't afford that." She grabs a cotton ball and douses it in nail polish remover- apparently she's giving up on her pedicure. She doesn't have much more luck with the remover than she had with the polish, so he takes it from her and sits down on the bed across from her chair.

"I think we can." He grabs her foot and starts taking the pink polish off (she really _did _make a mess of it, not that he's going to say this out loud). "I looked at hotels and stuff, and we can probably make it work." He gives her a rundown of everything he figured out moneywise, and she just looks at him.

"Sam…"

"Look. Jake wants to go on vacation. He's never really been anywhere, neither have Ethan and Hunter. I've only been to New York that one time in high school. And I know you really want to go see your friends."

Quinn's been in Cincinnati for five years now, but she still doesn't have any close friends. She's just never bonded with any of the women here, and the only ones she talks to on a regular basis are the ones she knows through Sam- his friends' wives and that sort of thing. She doesn't have any kind of friendships with the people she works with, and she only semi-knows any of their neighbors. Her friends are all in New York, and she hasn't seen them since she left. She still talks to them sometimes, but he knows it's not the same, and he wants her to be able to see them again.

"Do you really think we can do it?"

He nods, wiping away the last of the polish and then screwing the lid back on the remover. "We'll just have to watch what we spend the rest of the summer. But I mean, we would have to do that anyway."

Quinn's already smiling, so he knows she's sold without even thinking about it. She moves over to sit beside him on the bed and wraps an arm around his shoulder and kisses his cheek. "You are my favorite."

"Favorite what?"

"Everything." She presses her lips back to his cheek again and then rests her chin on his shoulder. "I love you."

"Good. Cause you're kinda stuck with me…"

Quinn rolls her eyes and uses the arm not around his shoulder to grab his hand and place it against her stomach. He feels a little fluttering almost immediately and smiles at her.

"See? Even Leah thinks you're the best."

Leah's not the worst name he's heard. Every single day, this baby has a different name, and some of them are definitely better than others. But then suddenly, he's struck with only like _the _most brilliant idea ever. "Oh, my god, we should name her Leia." Quinn's smile instantly drops, and she levels him with a glare that might be funny if she wasn't pregnant and hormonal and definitely capable of killing him. But he's serious. "No, it's perfect! It fits in with the two syllable thing, and it's almost like Leah!"

"You are not naming my child after any Star Wars character or any comic book character. Got it?"

"But it's a pretty name! And Princess Leia is hot."

"_That's _what you're worried about? Your daughter being _hot?"_

He rolls his eyes. "I'm just saying-"

"_I'm _just saying no. No naming her after dork stuff." She stops for a second and then narrows her eyes a little bit like she's just realizing something. "Is Jake named after Avatar?"

He lets out a defensive little laugh. "No!" She just stares at him like she doesn't believe him. "He's not, okay? Julia picked that name, I just agreed to it."

And okay, yeah, _maybe _Jake Sully served a little ulterior motive, but he's still almost certain than Twilight did, too. So what? They were nineteen and both happy to lie to each other and to everyone else and say they were naming their son after a well-known Biblical figure. It worked, okay?

A couple of seconds pass, and then Sam just can't help himself. "What about Eywa?"

…

Lima sucks.

It really just does. Like everything about it just sucks. They don't come here often, but they're there enough to know that nothing's really changed and that it doesn't seem like it ever will. The only reason they ever go to Lima is to see Quinn's mother and step-father, so it's not like they just go to hang out or anything. But just driving through the dull, lifeless streets makes Sam wonder how they ever survived there in the first place. Don't get him wrong, Cincinnati's no great prize, either, but at least there's stuff to _do _there.

Lima's just dead.

They take the kids up one Friday night to spend the weekend, and Quinn's already complaining before they even get in the car. She has more of a problem with Lima than he does- probably because he gets along with her parents much better than she does. That's never going to change. Quinn's just got a really weird relationship with her mom; she doesn't _hate _her, she just doesn't _like _her most day. But that's just how they are.

Judy and her husband Roger live in a house not too far from the house where Quinn grew up with her family. It's a nice part of town, and all of the houses are big and pretentious and a lot different from the modest, much, much smaller houses in their own neighborhood, so it's not surprising that the kids always look at it like some kind of magical castle or something.

As soon as they pull into the driveway, the kids are already unbuckling themselves and ready to jump out. They're literally running up the driveway to the door when Judy opens it and catches two toddlers who throw themselves at her. They almost knock her over, but she just laughs.

Judy might not be the best mom, but she's a good grandmother. Even Quinn can't deny that. The kids love her, and she doesn't waste a second to spoil them. It's not surprising that they're already looking for presents before they're even in the door. Nobody's disappointed because Mimi's got tons of new toys laid out, and the babies both run for them immediately. Judy just laughs and then kisses everyone else- Quinn and Sam and then Jake. Jake's always had kind of mixed feelings about Judy, but they've never really been _bad. _He's actually got a really good relationship with Roger, who apparently isn't home from work yet. Jake's interest is super piqued, though, when he realizes there's a brand new personal gaming system waiting for him on the coffee table. Sam doesn't even know how Judy knew which one to buy or what he wanted, but Jake's been begging for this one for months now, and it's seriously like Christmas came early. He immediately changes his tune and jumps up to hug Judy super tight around the neck like she's the most important person in the world right now.

Sam doesn't care if Judy spoils the kids. He figures it gives her something to do, and it's not like he can complain when someone is buying his kids things that they really want and love. He's really thankful, though, that she never leaves Jake out or treats him any differently. Obviously Jake's well aware of the fact that she's not his real grandmother, but Sam honestly doesn't know if the other two have any clue. They honestly probably don't realize that Quinn isn't his actual mother, either. They're too young to comprehend the full story, so no one has even tried to explain it yet, so they're probably pretty oblivious. Of course, they also have no clue that Roger's not actually their grandfather, either.

It's not like any of makes any kind of difference anyway.

…

Leave it to Quinn to suddenly be in the mood when they're at her freaking _mother's _house.

It's been kind of a dry spell lately, which is kind of typical, but whatever. She's usually got a pretty badass sex drive while she's pregnant, which is awesome, but she does have those times where she goes for like weeks just not wanting to be touched. It's normal, but it sucks. They've been stuck in one of those particular ruts for a little while now, so the fact that she's apparently over it is awesome.

The fact that they're in the guest bedroom at her parents' house… not so awesome.

It's not even that late- only like 10:30, but everybody's already in bed. The kids are all worn out from spending all day in the pool and then going out for a big dinner at one of Roger's favorite restaurants. Nobody argued when it was bedtime, not even Jake. Judy and Roger always go to bed pretty early because Roger's on an early morning wakeup schedule for work. So it's really not surprising that Quinn and Sam followed everyone else's lead and went to bed, too.

But apparently Quinn's not tired.

Sam's sitting on the edge of the bed flipping through his phone checking emails when he feels her sit down behind him. She presses a kiss behind his ear and then rests her chin on his shoulder and flat out whispers that she wants him to do her. She's crazy, number one, because there's no way they're doing that in her parents' house. And number two, Quinn doesn't talk like that. So it's not surprising that he gives her the best what the fuck look he can manage.

"Come on," she urges, bumping her cheek against his. "It's been forever."

It hasn't been _forever, _but it's been awhile. But whatever, that's her fault, not his. It's not like _he's _the one campaigning to put a halt in their sex life, but he knows better than to push her when she doesn't feel like it. So he deals. Whatever. But still.

"We're in your mom's house."

"So?" He turns his head to see her better, and she's looking at him like she honestly doesn't know what the big deal is. She's got to be crazy. Either that, or she's having some kind of insane reaction to her prenatal vitamins.

"We can't have sex in your _mother's house."_

Quinn rolls her eyes. "We're married, Sam. And you've knocked me up three times. In a _row. _I'm pretty sure everybody knows we have sex. Even my mother isn't _that _naïve."

"That doesn't mean we need to flaunt it in front of her!"

Another eye roll. "Oh, my god, we're not going to invite her in to observe or like make her a DVD! Why would she even know?"

If she's trying to turn him on, talking about her mother and a potential sex tape in the same sentence is not the way to go. This must be evident on her face because she kisses him again, this time right below his ear, and he feels her arms go around right before she pushes her hands under his shirt. She presses her nails into his stomach, probably because she knows that he never fails to find that super hot. She doesn't play fair.

"Please?" Her voice is all quiet and fake innocent now, and she already knows she's going to win, but that doesn't mean he's actually into the idea.

"Quinn, seriously. We're in your parents' _house."_

"So what? We've done it in _your_ parents' house."

Sam rolls his eyes because okay, that's technically true, but it's not the same thing. "That's different. We were there for like a month." They had to stay with his parents for a few weeks while they were waiting on the updates to their house to be finished before they could move in. That was a totally different situation- they were there for more than two freaking nights.

Plus, his parents aren't nearly as crazy as her mom is.

But leave it to Quinn to pull out the big guns and make it next to impossible to refuse her anything. "I'm pregnant. With your baby. It's your job to take care of me."

He lets out a sigh because seriously, what the hell is he supposed to say to that? He knows better than to point out that he's been doing everything from rubbing her feet to running her bath water for months now. He's sure as hell been the one getting up in the middle of the night when "the baby" decides she's hungry. He takes care of her, and she knows it. So to use that against him right now is just kind of playing dirty.

He doesn't even realize what's happening until she's already pulled his shirt over his head and left him there totally naked from the waist up. She also doesn't waste any time going right back into her attempted seduction- kissing the back of his neck and down over his shoulder while she lets those freshly manicured nails torture his chest in the best kind of way.

She's going to win eventually, he might as well just give up.

…

If he thought Quinn was bad about buying the baby stuff, he shouldn't even comment on her mother.

Judy's habit of spoiling her grandkids apparently bleeds over into spoiling the ones that aren't even born yet because she and Quinn go shopping on Sunday morning and come back with literally nine bags of stuff. Nine bags of stuff that _he _has to drag in from the car.

Roger took Jake out early for a fishing trip, and Quinn and Judy went shopping after breakfast. So Sam's been alone with Ethan and Hunter all day at the house. They've spent most of the day in the pool because the kids love swimming and don't really have a place to do it too often at home. But while the kids may love it, Sam actually finds the whole thing super tiring, just because he has to be so on top of everything every single second that they're in the water. Obviously neither of them can swim on their own yet, but at least they're at the point where they can safely use floats for the most part, so it's not like he has to hold them all the time. But it's not exactly easy keeping your eyes on two kids nonstop in a pool, so he's kind of happy when he hears the car pull up and has an excuse to get the kids out of the water. Instead of letting them drip through the house, he gets them semi-dried off and lets them run around to the front where their mom and their grandmother have returned with a whole trunk full of new goodies for their sister. Sam's slightly delayed and gets to the driveway just in time to hear Quinn squeal as two wet toddlers attack her.

"Did you buy out an entire store or what?" He looks into the trunk of Judy's Lexus and wonders how the hell people can buy so much stuff at one time. He hates shopping.

"It's stuff we need," Quinn says a little defensively.

"And let me guess, I get to carry it all, right?"

She smiles with smug sweetness and says, "You should at least dry off first."

"Yes, your majesty." He rolls his eyes a little bit and ignores the way Judy watches them with her own smug little smile, like she's proud she raised such a demanding and bossy daughter.

Quinn, on the other hand, ignores his sarcasm and says, "Take the princes with you." She pushes the kids toward him, and he only sighs a little bit before he has them both picked up, one in each arm, and is headed back toward the house

He doesn't know what he's going to do when the princess (Leia) gets here because he only has two arms.

…

Wednesdays are his early days because his last client leaves at two.

He goes home and finds his mom folding laundry in the living room while Jake practices for the zombie apocalypse on the Playstation. The little kids must be napping, since he didn't get immediately tackled, and he's honestly a little bit glad for that. He sits down right beside his mom and starts helping because it's the right thing to do. Quinn doesn't like his mother doing any kind of chores for them (especially since she babysits for free), but it's not as weird to Sam. He knows she doesn't mind helping, but he's certainly not going to just sit there and watch her fold their laundry without jumping in to help.

They talk a little about the day while Jake shoots zombies and ignores them both. He was right, and the kids are asleep. Apparently they've been fighting all day, which is just great because fighting kids are always the best kind… She brings up Ethan and says he actually used the potty three times today, which is amazing because it means that the potty training is moving along really well. But it makes Sam think about something else.

"You remember when he was sick a few weeks ago?" His mom nods and doesn't really look up from the sock pairing she's doing. "The pediatrician said she thinks he might be dyslexic."

He hasn't brought it up before. In fact, he and Quinn have barely talked about it. It's not like some huge tragedy or something, but it's not exactly something either one of them really want to think about, either. His mom stops what she's doing, though, and looks at him.

"How could she know that? He's only three."

"She said he's showing a lot of early signs or something. Like he uses both hands when he colors, and he mixes up parts of his words a lot."

"You did that, too," she says slowly. "Not the hands thing, but the way he flips his words sometimes… You used to do that."

Sam doesn't particularly want to hear that because it just gives more evidence to the fact that Ethan might really have inherited it. "It just sucks. I don't want him to have to deal with all that crap."

It made everything so much harder than it should have been. Reading. Writing. Math. Hell, even tying his shoes. There are obviously much worse things in the world, but that doesn't mean it doesn't suck.

"Well, there's no way of knowing right now, I'm sure. And if Ethan _is _dyslexic, at least you'll be able to help him."

Sam doesn't know how that's supposed to work. How is he supposed to help his son read when he still looks at pages and can't get words to focus or fall into any kind of sensible order? That doesn't really seem helpful.

"You'll know what he's going through," she clarifies. "It'll be better than when you were a kid. We had no idea what was going on or how to help or anything. It was really hard."

Sam's never actually thought about his parents facing difficulty with his learning disability. It always just seemed like something he went through on his own. But thinking about it, he's sure it was frustrating for his parents to see his low grades and hear from teachers that he wasn't paying attention or wasn't grasping concepts or whatever. They actually had to take him out of public school and get him tested on their own before they even found out what was wrong. He's sure it wasn't easy on them trying to understand a learning disability that neither of them had any previous experience with.

So maybe his mom's right. At least he'd be able to relate firsthand, and that's at least better than nothing.

…

They book a hotel and officially set things in motion for the New York trip.

Quinn seems beyond thrilled, and Sam's getting excited, too. He's excited to take the kids on vacation and also just to get out of Ohio for a few days. Ethan and Hunter really don't know what's going on, but Jake's starting to get excited, too, and he starts talking about all the stuff he wants to do and everything he wants to see. He starts spending a lot of time on the Internet looking up things to do in New York, and it's cool to see him actually excited for something instead of just being mopey and rolling his eyes like he does most of the time.

There's still the money issue, and they're still a little nervous about it. But they've pretty much worked it out a million times, so it should be okay. And anyway, they deserve to splurge once in awhile. It's not like they spend a ton of money on excess stuff all the time or anything. It's nice to have something to look forward to.

Sam hasn't kept up with a lot of people from high school, and he knows Quinn hasn't, either. He doesn't honestly remember the last time he talked to anyone, but he knows that a few people live in New York. Or at least they used to. On a whim, he sends an email to the last address he had for Kurt and asks if he's still up there. He gets a reply within an hour.

Kurt's still in New York, and so is Rachel. Apparently everyone else who migrated there at one point or another has moved on, but Kurt's working for an online fashion blog and Rachel's conquering Broadway just like she always planned. Sam actually knew that. It's kind of hard not to hear about the most famous person he's ever known. Not that she's like _famous _famous or whatever, but she's Broadway famous, which is what she always wanted to do anyway. Sam doesn't like keep up with theatre or anything, but he's Googled her a few times over the years, and a bunch of stuff always comes up. Kurt gives him his number and says to call when they get to the city. He says he wants to meet up, and Sam thinks it'll be kind of cool to catch up.

He's sure Quinn will think the same thing.

…

A/N: Thanks so much to everyone who has been reading and reviewing. I'm glad you're enjoying the story, and it really means a lot!


	8. Chapter 8

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 8**

…

So it turns out that New York is a lot more overwhelming when you're trying to be responsible and keep up with three kids than it is when you're sixteen and basically running crazy with your friends.

He's definitely no expert on the city, but Quinn spent enough time here to know where to go and what to do when they first get in. The very first thing Sam realizes is that maybe flying would have been worth it because trying to drive in this city is basically the worst thing he's ever done. The traffic's one thing, but the _way _people drive here is just crazy. He literally says a prayer in his head, just asking that they can at least get to the hotel without being hit by a bus or rammed into by an impatient cab driver. It works, but just barely.

He's never been so thankful in his life to finally park a car and get out.

He's been driving all night, and he's tired. The kids haven't been awful and really _have _slept a lot of the way, but they're restless and whiney by the time they finally get to the hotel. Jake, on the other hand, is wide awake and seems to be in awe of everything around him. Sam's really surprised he doesn't just take off running down the street as soon as they get out of the car. Luckily, he doesn't. He helps lug suitcases while Quinn manages the little kids, and by some miracle, they actually get checked into the hotel and up to the room without any major disasters.

It's not the nicest hotel in the world, but it's not horrible. He's stayed in worse. He's _lived _in worse. So, yeah. It's fine. All he wants to do, though, is lay down on one of those beds and sleep for a few hours. He hasn't been to bed, and he's seriously not sure he's ever been more tired in his entire life.

Unfortunately for him, everyone else got to sleep in the car, and no one seems to share his exhaustion.

Jake's got about a million different things printed out that he wants to do and see, and he starts pulling them out of his backpack the second they get in the room, grabbing Quinn and asking her what's close and what they can do first. She tells him to calm down and that they need to eat first. This isn't surprising because eating is usually the first thing on Quinn's minds these days, but Jake seems less enthused. At least until Quinn tells him that she'll take him out to find breakfast and that he can help her bring it back. Apparently getting out at all is enough to appease Jake because he jumps right back up and heads for the door before anybody can stop him. Sam's just kind of confused as to what's happening, but Quinn hurries after Jake and calls over her shoulder that they'll be back.

And that's it.

Ethan and Hunter have never even been in a hotel before, and they're already bouncing off the walls, running around the room and looking at each and every single thing in sight. They're amazed by the shower in the bathroom, amazed by the free standing wardrobe, and, of course, amazed by the beds with their big fluffy comforters. They're jumping on a bed within minutes, and Sam has to grab them and sit them both down with half-hearted threats before they stop. He grabs the remote and tells them that if they just sit there and quietly watch TV until Momma and Jake get back that he'll get them a treat later. He doesn't know what that treat is at the moment, but he really doesn't care. All he wants to do is sleep.

He falls asleep immediately to the sounds of Playhouse Disney and stays asleep for maybe ten minutes before he wakes up to the sound of crying.

Hunter's on the floor holding his head, and Sam's half-disoriented but figures out fast enough that he fell off the bed and hit his head on the corner of the nightstand. He can tell by how guilty Ethan looks that they were most likely doing something they weren't supposed to be. He picks Hunter up and checks his head to make sure he didn't actually hurt himself; it's just a little red, so he should be fine. And then he asks if they were jumping on the bed and gets a resounding no from both of them, which just confirms his theory. He gives them that look, and it takes only a couple of seconds before they break and Ethan's trying to make excuses. Sam doesn't want to hear it, and he tells them both to hush and that if they do it again, they're going to be in big trouble. He's tired and pissed off and probably shouldn't be attempting to discipline his kids right now, but oh, well. Sometimes getting mad is the only thing that gets their attention.

He manages to go back to sleep for another thirty minutes, but then it's all over because Quinn and Jake are back, and the room's immediately in total chaos with the arrival of breakfast. Sam just gives up on trying to sleep and downs a coffee while Jake tells him everything he saw during his three block walk to a corner diner.

He has a feeling it's going to be a really long week.

…

By the end of the first day, he literally wants to crawl into bed and sleep for five years. That's how tired he is.

He's been drinking caffeine all day, so it's not just lack of sleep- he's just _tired. _Pushing a stroller around New York City is the most strenuous workout he's ever done, and he actually works at a gym. But seriously, it's _exhausting. _He hates dealing with this stroller, but there's no way in hell they'd be able to do anything here without it. For one, the kids would start whining within an hour, and even if he refused to carry them, keeping up with them would be way more trouble than just using the damn stroller.

But seriously, it's a pain in the ass.

The thing about New York is you have to walk everywhere or ride public transportation. It's not worth it to drive, and he'd seriously rather slit his own wrists than battle driving in this city again anyway. So yeah, anywhere they want to go, they have to make their own way there, and it wouldn't be bad at all if it was just him and Quinn. Or even just them and Jake. But adding a double stroller to the mix is basically hell on earth.

Still, it's worth it to watch his kids' eyes light up at all the new sights. Especially Jake. Sam honestly doesn't remember Jake being so excited over anything in his entire life. It's like he's literally having the time of his life or something, and it's kind of awesome. Quinn loves it, too, and she's basically become his own personal tour guide. Sam can tell she's happy to be back here and happy to be showing it off. And Jake's hanging on her like his life depends on it or something. Meanwhile, Sam gets to deal with the little kids whining about being hot and hungry, so somehow, he thinks he's getting the short end of the stick.

But it's still totally worth it.

When they get back to the hotel, everyone is pretty tired. Sam saves time and showers with the little kids and then leaves it for Jake. Quinn's so high maintenance that she swears she can only shower in the morning or else her hair will never cooperate, but whatever. That just means everybody gets settled down faster, and at the moment, that's all Sam wants. Ethan and Hunter go to bed without any kind of argument, and Sam honestly doesn't care how late Jake stays up as long as he's not making a lot of noise or anything. He's not, he just wants to dig through all his printouts again, and Quinn stays up with him for a little while and helps.

Sam, though, falls asleep probably before his head even hits the pillow, and he's seriously never slept so good in his entire life.

…

He wakes up late the next morning and only opens his eyes because he has tiny hands on his face literally prying them open.

Ethan's staring at him when he finally gets oriented, and the only thing he says is, "Momma and Jake is gone."

Sam's confused for a second, but then he realizes that Ethan's telling the truth, and that Quinn and Jake are, indeed, not in the room. There's a note right beside him, though, that says that they went to get breakfast. Sam's fine with that because he figured out yesterday that the less time spent fighting food lines with the whole family, the better.

He kind of wants to go back to sleep, but it's already after nine. Plus, the kids are awake, so he gets up. He gets the kids ready- diapers changed, teeth brushed, new clothes, sunblock, all that stuff. He's just combing the last of the tangles out of Hunter's hair when the door opens and Quinn and Jake come back in with bags of food and trays of drinks just like yesterday. And again, just like yesterday, Jake looks happier than he has in ages.

Quinn gets the boys set up at the table and starts spreading cream cheese on bagels while Jake sucks down a bottle of orange juice and starts telling Sam that they're going to see the Statue of Liberty today and can they please, please, _please _ride the ferry that takes you all the way out to it. Sam doesn't even know what he's talking about, but he assumes he should say yes, so he does. Jake's smile is like three times as big as it was before (and it was already big), and then he says Quinn told him that she'll take him to the Met this week, too, and show him where she used to work before she came to Cincinnati. He's signing so fast that Sam's probably missing half of it, but he's trying to keep up the best he can.

Seriously, as tiring at this is already turning out to be, it's worth it just for this.

…

They meet Kurt for dinner on their third night.

They go to this Italian restaurant, and just the name of it makes Sam nervous. He even asked Kurt on the phone if it was kid friendly and explicitly laid out the fact that he has two toddlers who are kind of hyper. Kurt swore it'd be fine, but Sam's still nervous.

Luckily for him, the kids are pretty tired out by the time dinner rolls around, and they're relatively calm when they get to the restaurant. They take a chance and drop the stroller at the hotel beforehand, since the restaurant's not too far away, and Sam carries Hunter while Quinn keeps a death-grip on Ethan's hand. Luckily, they make it to the restaurant without any kind of mishaps, and they find Kurt already at a table.

He looks exactly the same, if that's possible. He's still dressed the same, still has the same hair. It's probably all incredibly different or something, but to Sam, it still looks the same. He stands up when he sees them and squees a little bit at the sight of Quinn's stomach. That's a pretty normal reaction for anyone who hasn't seen her in a couple of months, much less more than a decade. He hugs her and kisses her cheek, and then he hugs Sam, and it's Ethan, of course, who bluntly says, "Who are you?" and makes Kurt laugh.

Sam explains who Kurt is and introduces the kids as he gets them settled in. It's one of those wraparound booths, so he works it so that Hunter and Ethan are between Quinn and him, hoping that they can somehow keep them calm and under control for however long it takes to eat at this place.

Kurt's just staring at them like he's in awe of something, and he must realize he's doing it because he says, "I can't believe you guys turned into the freaking _Brady Bunch." _

Sam wants to point out that they only have 3.5 kids and that the Brady Bunch had six, but he doesn't because Quinn's laughing and rolling her eyes. "Well, where are yours?"

And Kurt rolls his own eyes like the thought is ludicrous or something. "_Please. _You know nobody settles down in this city until they're at least thirty-five. I still have a couple of years left."

Sam wants to ask what happened to Blaine, but he realizes that was years ago and that not everybody settles down with their high school sweetheart. Apparently nobody does except him. And it took ten years apart before _that _even happened. Quinn is way nosier, though, and flat out asks if he's dating anyone.

"Nobody of importance. Not at the moment."

Then he asks how old the kids are, and Sam tells him, "Twelve, two, and three." He can see Kurt working the math in his head and looking at Jake with a little bit of confusion. Obviously he knows Quinn spent the majority of her twenties in New York, so it's kind of obvious what the deal is. Thankfully, Kurt has enough common sense or decency to not come right out and ask; he's not dumb, he can obviously deduce.

"So is this the last one?"

Quinn nods immediately, and Sam laughs because she looks so eager to answer that question. They've already discussed it, so it's not like it's surprising, but it's still funny that she's so quick and adamant to answer. "We're done," she says without question.

"Do you know what it is yet?"

"A girl." Quinn smiles like she always does when she answers that question. "Finally."

"What's her name?"

Sam laughs at that, and Quinn gives him a little glare before calmly saying that they haven't decided yet. She and Kurt keep talking, but Sam gets distracted when Hunter starts picking his nose. Sam grabs his hand and pulls it away, which only makes Hunter start whining, and since there are literally no other children in this restaurant, Sam's willing to do just about anything to not draw attention and be embarrassed. He picks Hunter up and can tell he's tired and nearing his limit by the way he immediately puts his head down against Sam's shoulder. That's fine if it keeps him calmed down. Unfortunately, he sticks his thumb in his mouth, and Jake takes it upon himself to pull it out. To be fair, they _have _been trying to break the thumb sucking habit for awhile, so Jake's probably (mostly) doing it to help with that, but Hunter isn't happy and doesn't waste one second before reaching out and hitting Jake on the head. Jake thankfully doesn't hit him back, but he does give Sam a very expectant look like… _did you see that, what are you going to do about it? _Sam, of course, is already embarrassed, so he just, once again, grabs Hunter's hand and shakes his head. Then he tries to divert Jake's attention by helping him spread oil on a slice of fresh bread that the server brings to the table.

He's never been so happy to order a beer in his entire life.

It turns out that Kurt's even more of a gossip now than he was when they were in high school, and he's able to give them updates on tons of people, even though Sam gets the feeling that he doesn't talk to most of them on a regular basis. They, of course, eventually get around to Rachel, and Quinn comes right out and asks what happened to Finn. Sam's a little curious, too, because he knows they got married not long after high school. Kurt, though, rolls his eyes and says, "Married and divorced before she was even out of college."

"Why'd they get divorced?" Quinn seems way too interested, but Sam's not really shocked.

"Because they were too young to get married in the first place!" Kurt says this like it's the most obvious thing in the world, and maybe it is. "And Finn hated it here. And you know Rachel, she decided she was a native New Yorker the second she stepped foot in this city. They fought for about two years, and then Finn just gave up and left, and Rachel acted like she didn't even care."

The entire idea of divorce is almost foreign to Sam. Obviously he knows plenty of people who are divorced, but like he seriously cannot imagine ever doing it. He'd do whatever he had to do to make sure it never came to that point, and he just can't imagine how people can just give up like that. It's probably super idealistic or something, but he's always kind of been that way-idealistic, sometimes to a fault. But he grew up watching his parents, and no matter what, even when things were at their worst, he never worried that his family was going to be split up. But maybe it's different when kids are involved or something, but he just can't imagine things ever getting so bad that he would just willingly give up.

"Finn's in Indiana now. He's married to a dental hygienist." Kurt rolls his eyes and adds, "She's a bitch." He immediately seems to realize that there are kids because he makes an _oops _face, but Ethan and Hunter are both too involved in their ravioli to notice. Jake, on the other hand, is paying extra close attention to everything, and Sam wonders if Kurt realizes he can read lips pretty well.

"And what about Rachel?" he tries to change the subject because he doesn't really need to hear all about Kurt's feelings on his sister-in-law if they're so terrible.

"She's married to the stage now. She's boring." He takes a drink of his wine and then carefully wipes his lips. "You should see her show while you're here. She's pretty amazing."

Sam hadn't really thought of that, but it would be kind of cool to see her. He doesn't care much about theatre, but he's never been to a Broadway show, and it might be fun, especially knowing someone in the cast. Quinn, though, is more realistic.

"We'd like to, but I doubt the kids could sit still for that long."

"Well, bring them to me," Kurt shrugs his shoulders like it's an obvious answer. "I can watch them for a few hours, and you guys can go to the show."

That would be a perfect idea if Sam wasn't one-hundred percent positive that Kurt would renege on his offer if he had any idea just how hyper the kids can get. He's about to point this out, but Quinn beats him to it.

"Trust me, you don't want to do that."

Kurt ignores her, though, and already has his phone out. "I'm getting you tickets for tomorrow," he says without any room for argument. "Do you want two or three tickets?" He's looking at Jake, who now seems a little bit confused about what's happening. "The show's a little PG-13ish."

Sam knows there's no way Jake's going to be comfortable staying with a babysitter, much less one that's a virtual stranger. He's still nervous about how even the little ones will react. But he doesn't want to seem rude, either, so he asks Jake if he wants to go to a play. There's the obvious setback that he won't be able to hear anything that's going on, but it might be fun for him anyway. Jake just shrugs, but then he nods, so Sam looks at Kurt who's already texting something.

A few seconds later, his phone buzzes, and he says, "Rachel's leaving tickets at the box office. Just pick them up before the show."

…

So that's how they find themselves inside a Broadway theatre the next night.

The seats aren't bad at all, and the tickets were free, so it's not like they can complain. Sam's still not sure leaving the kids with Kurt is the best idea because he's afraid they'll go crazy and be terrible or something. They purposely spent a lot of time at the park this afternoon, trying to tire the kids out as much as possible. Hopefully they just eat dinner and then settle down and fall asleep or something.

The box office gave Jake this little thing that apparently shows everything in close caption or something, and it's kind of amazing that it starts working as soon as the lights go down and the announcements first begin.

And surprisingly, Sam doesn't want to immediately kill himself.

Believe it or not, the show is actually kind of awesome. And Rachel is just amazing, like for real. Not that he's surprised or whatever because she's always been amazing, and it's not like anybody ever doubted that she could and would do this. She's basically the lead, and she's got most of the focus the whole time. Her singing's even better than he remembers, and by intermission or whatever, he's seriously impressed.

Jake, though, seems less enthused.

When Quinn asks if he likes it, he ignores the question and just says that he's hungry. Not surprisingly, Quinn echoes his sentiment, and Sam knows that's his cue to get up and get them something to eat. Jake tags along, and they wait in a massively long line to pay twenty bucks for three bottles of water, a pack of peanuts, and a bag of Twizzlers. He's not too surprised when Jake admits that he's bored. Sam tells him to just hang on and that it's actually really cool that they're getting to see this. Jake seems less convinced, but he's been on such good behavior and in such a great mood that he doesn't argue.

But he seems to change his mind some time during the second act where Rachel suddenly starts taking her clothes off.

And okay, to be fair, Kurt warned them that it was "a little PG-13ish," but his definition of PG-13 must be way different than Sam's because this is definitely more R. She doesn't get completely naked, but her shirt's gone, and the whole thing must as well just be called the Rachel Berry Boob Extravaganza or something because they're just right there on display for everyone, and like… seriously? This is not what he expected at all.

It takes him probably a full minute of staring in shock before he finally looks over at Quinn who's got the same kind of mildly disturbed look on her face. She must feel him looking at her because she turns her head and gives him this total look of confusion, which he gets completely. But then they both seem to remember Jake at exactly the same time and look between them to see that he's apparently much more interested in the show than he was before. Sam wishes he could say he's surprised, but he's not. It's boobs. And like… kind of _nice _boobs even. And okay, stop- he does _not _need to say that or let on that he's even _thinking _it because he's pretty sure appreciating Rachel Berry's breasts is a good way to actually get that divorce he couldn't even comprehend the night before. Quinn must not notice, or maybe she's just more concerned with the fact that Jake seems way too into what's happening on stage. And by concerned, he obviously means horrified because it only takes a few more seconds before she's slapping a hand over Jake's eyes and looking at Sam expectantly like he's supposed to stand up and demand that all nakedness on stage cease or something. He can't do anything about it, and he shrugs to show her that.

It doesn't stop the glare she's readied for him.

"That was _not _PG-13." Quinn's obviously not happy as they gather up their things to leave the theatre and she checks her phone to make sure Kurt hasn't called. It's nice that she's basically got the same sentiment as him, but she seems way more concerned than he is. To be honest, it doesn't really bother him all that much that Jake saw it because he's twelve, not two. He's going to see boobs, and it's kind of unrealistic to think that he won't. Quinn, for all her progressive _talk to him about sex _stuff, seems way more disturbed than Sam is. Maybe it's a guy thing, but Sam's not like _upset _that his kid is apparently interested in half-naked women. It's normal, isn't it? He's going to see that stuff sooner or later, if he hasn't already.

"I don't think we should make a big deal about it." Sam makes a point to talk over Jake's head so that he can't really see what he's saying. "Just leave it alone."

Quinn opens her mouth like she's about to say something, but she stops when her phone buzzes in her hand. "Great," she says, rolling her eyes a little bit before she hands him the phone.

_Hey, it's Rachel! Kurt gave me your number. I'd love to see you guys. Meet me at the stage door in about a half hour._

Sam shrugs again because it's not like they can just ignore her. She got them free tickets to her show, and to be honest, he _wants _to see her. He thinks Quinn's taking this whole thing way too seriously, and she's acting pissed off at _him _like he can help the fact that he just saw Rachel take her clothes off. He hates how women do that- like it's his fault that he saw Rachel's boobs or something. He's genetically predispositioned to look when there are naked breasts in front of him. He can't _help _it.

Quinn spends the next thirty minutes texting with Kurt and essentially giving Sam the silent treatment. He doesn't really know what her problem is, but he just ignores it and talks to Jake who seems to have gotten over his brief brush with female nudity and is now begging to go to a Yankees game. There's a crowd of people out here, and Sam's not really sure what happens, like if people come out and sign autographs or whatever, but he really doesn't know how Rachel's even going to see them in this crowd.

She does, though, and she makes her way through the crowd, signing a few autographs and posing for a couple of pictures before she waves excitedly in their direction with that huge Rachel Berry smile that hasn't changed one bit.

"Oh, my god!" she practically squeals when she hurries over to them. She's got both adults in a hug before anyone even notices, and then she's smiling at Jake and saying, "Hi, I'm Rachel!" like she's never been so excited to introduce herself to anyone in her entire life.

Sam interprets it, mainly to let Rachel know he can't hear without having to come right out and say it and also because he's fairly sure Jake missed it anyway. Given as how he's staring at a spot several inches below her lips. And making it pretty obvious, too. Sam head locks him in a not-so-playful manner and pats his head just a little too roughly, hopefully to literally knock some sense into him before Rachel notices or, worse, before Quinn notices.

"This is Jake. He says nice to meet you." What Jake _actually _says is more along the lines of- _you're hurting my neck!- _but close enough.

They make plans to all head to Kurt's (obviously Sam and Quinn have to head there anyway), and Rachel suggests they just take a taxi because it's much easier than trying to fight the train right now. Quinn seems to agree with this, and Sam honestly doesn't care one way or the other. What he _does _care about is that his son is still gunning for Pervert of the Year or something, and he doesn't really trust him in a car with Rachel right now. So he makes up some lie about promising to get the babies something and says he and Jake will do that and meet them at Kurt's. Quinn looks a little suspicious, or maybe she just doubts that he can navigate his way anywhere in this city without help. But he's got Kurt's address saved in his phone, so it shouldn't be that difficult to read it off to a cab driver.

Once they're alone, Sam drags Jake into one of the million souvenir (junk) shops lining the streets in Times Square and immediately pulls him into the most deserted corner he can find. "Dude, you can't just stare at her boobs like that!"

Jake looks confused for a few seconds and then kind of pissed off and defensive when he immediately denies it and says that he wasn't staring.

Sam gives him a look that says he's lying and that Sam knows it. It only takes a couple of seconds after that for Jake's face to turn semi-guilty. "Look, I know they're nice, but you can't _stare _like that. It's… It's just rude, okay? Just don't stare."

Jake wants to know _why _it's rude, and Sam doesn't even know how to explain it, so he just says, "It just is, okay? Girls don't like when you stare like that."

And Jake is apparently too logical for his own good because he wants to know why they don't cover them up if they don't want people to look. It's a very good question, and Sam does not know the answer. Rachel, for example, even after she put her clothes on, still came out in a low-cut tank top that didn't leave much of anything to the imagination, and, to be honest, Sam thinks girls probably do that stuff on purpose just so guys _will _look and then girls will have an excuse to be pissy. But whatever. He can't tell all that stuff to Jake.

"I don't know," he says honestly, answering the question the best way he knows. "But you can't stare at them like that because they get really mad. And Quinn's already freaking out anyway, so don't like give her more reason, okay?" Jake still looks really confused, and Sam just shakes his head. "Just forget about them, okay? Don't stare, and just try not to think about them."

Jake, again with the logic, asks how he's supposed to just forget about something he already saw. Sam seriously liked him better when he was like five and just blindly listened to whatever people told him.

"Okay, you can think about them. But just… Just think about them when you're alone, okay? Not like in front of other people." Jake's got this look on his face that makes Sam afraid that this conversation is about to get a _whole _lot more awkward, and seriously? They're in a freaking store called Times Square Top Gifts. This is so not the place for that. He changes the subject quickly and says, "Help me find something for your brothers."

That distracts Jake long enough to make him ask why Ethan and Hunter get something, and Sam just rolls his eyes. "You can get something, too, I don't care. Just help me find cheap shit."

He doesn't mean to cuss, but Jake either doesn't notice or doesn't care because he doesn't point it out. It's kind of nice because it feels like a big symbol of the transition between little kid and not-so-little kid, now that he can cuss in front of his kid without having some big to do _you said a bad word _BS, but there's obviously the downside- that transition from little kid to not-so-little kid also means he gets to gets to have conversations about why you should only think about naked women when you're alone in your room.

And _Jesus Christ, _he is so not ready for this crap.

…

**A/N: More New York coming up!**


	9. Chapter 9

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 9**

…

The worst thing about staying in a hotel room is that it's absolutely impossible to wake up peacefully.

Sam's not like a total early morning grump or anything, but he likes to have a few minutes to wake up. He likes to hit the snooze on his alarm once or twice and let himself wake up slowly. It's just better. But being in one room with five people kind of does away with that possibility. It gives him serious flashbacks to being fifteen, and that's not exactly the part of his life he likes to remember the most or anything. But seriously- he literally didn't have a peaceful night's sleep for like four months when his whole family was living in one room. He was either getting kicked all night by his brother and sister or getting woken up way too early by somebody else's pee break or shower. It sucked, and this sucks, too.

He once again wakes up to the sound of crying, and he opens one eye to see Hunter standing right beside the bed, literally staring at him as tears stream down his face. He's being way too loud and dramatic for somebody that's not bleeding, and Sam has to bite his tongue to keep from telling him to shut up and go back to sleep. He doesn't, though, but he does make sure that his annoyance is obvious when he asks what's wrong.

"Bit me!"

"What bit you?" Sam reaches up and turns on the little lamp beside the bed. The sun's just barely starting to come up, but there's not enough light in the room to really see much.

"Him!" Hunter points at the bed he just abandoned, and Sam leans up to see which of his other kids has decided to turn into an early morning cannibal. But Jake and Ethan are both asleep, and he can tell that they've both been that way for awhile.

"Nobody bit you, Hunter." That just makes the tears fall even more, and Sam sighs and looks over his shoulder. Must be nice to be Quinn and be able to sleep through anything because she hasn't even flinched.

Hunter's having some kind of issue at the moment. He's probably tired and confused or something, but he's crying pretty hard and seems genuinely upset. Sam grabs him and pulls him into the bed. He tucks him under the cover and hugs him tight. Maybe they can both go back to sleep for a little while. Hunter's still crying, but he calms down some, and then he even yawns a little bit.

Just another hour or so, and things'll be perfect.

…

The morning actually _does _go pretty well.

Hunter's calmed down by the time Quinn and Jake get back from their now traditional breakfast run, and Ethan is in one of those giggly moods that kind of makes everything around him funny, too. Everybody eats breakfast and plays around a little bit. They all had kind of a late night, but everyone's in a surprisingly good mood.

They're headed back to the park for the morning because apparently there are about a hundred more playgrounds to hit in Central Park, and the kids are in total love already. The plan is to get the kids playing as much as possible so that they're relatively calm for the wedding. It's going to be the first time the little kids have been to a wedding, but hopefully everything goes okay. There's a better chance of that if they're super tired.

Jake's ready. Hunter's read. Ethan's almost ready, but he has a minor setback when Quinn goes to put on his shoes. He grabs his feet like he's protecting them and says, "Toras wear sneakers!"

Sam has _no _idea what he's talking about and doesn't even really pay attention until Quinn asks for a repeat, and Ethan says it again. "Toras wear sneakers!"

Quinn looks at Sam and raises her eyebrows. "What is he saying?"

"Is he talking about the _Torah?" _Sam can't imagine why he _would _be, but that's what it sounds like.

Quinn looks super confused and then turns her attention back to Ethan. "What are you saying?"

"_Toras." _It's obvious that he's getting frustrated, but seriously. They have no clue what he's talking about.

"Where did you hear that?"

"That man."

"What man?"

"That man. We went at his house."

"Kurt?" Quinn raises her eyebrows again, and Ethan nods.

Sam has no idea what is happening. "Is Kurt Jewish?"

"Kurt's an atheist."

Ethan gets a really annoyed look on his face. "Only toras wear sneakers!"

Sam's still super confused, but a look of amusement slowly takes over Quinn's face. "Are you saying _tourists?" _Ethan nods, and Quinn laughs. "That makes a lot more sense."

Sam rolls his eyes. Just what he needs. A three year old fashionista who can no longer wear Nike.

Ethan refuses to hand over his feet for shoes, and Sam finally just grabs them and starts shoving them into sneakers. He gets screams of protest that he ignores. But when he almost gets kicked in the face, he just says, "Hate to break it to you, buddy, but you're a tora."

"No!"

Fan-freaking-tastic.

…

Central Park is giant and awesome and maybe the best place ever.

They find a playground and settle down there for a little while. Jake's been over the playground thing for a couple of years, so he convinces Quinn that they should go walk around, and she agrees despite the fact that she's pregnant and it's about four-hundred degrees outside. Sam's a little bummed because he'd like to go exploring the park, too, but Ethan and Hunter aren't going to be ready to leave this child's paradise anytime soon, so he doesn't even try to make them. Instead, he stays with the little kids, but that's okay, too. Because even though his twelve year old is over the whole playground thing, Sam still thinks they're kind of awesome, and he actually loves chasing his kids around and watching them laugh so hard that the only real sounds they can make are just shrieks. He's a dork, yeah, but he _likes _playing with his kids. He's always liked playing… Maybe he just didn't grow up or something. But even when he was too old to really like toys or playgrounds or whatever, he still got to play with his brother and sister. And then Jake. And now the little kids. So he's kind of lucky in a way because he's always had an excuse to still be a kid.

This is actually a really "toddler friendly" playground. There's lots of soft equipment and stuff lower to the ground than on traditional playgrounds, so it's kind of perfect. There are a few parents milling around the equipment, but for the most part, they're sitting on the park benches, reading or maybe holding smaller babies. Ethan and Hunter are hanging all over Sam, though, dragging him with them and demanding he chase them and "help" them. It's fun, so it's not like he minds at all. Eventually, though, they start playing with some of the other kids, and it gives Sam a chance to take a break and join the rest of the parents on the benches. He finds a good spot where he can still keep a close eye on the kids, and he's just about to snap a picture to send to his mom when a woman sits down beside him and says, "Your kids are super cute."

She's pretty young, maybe just a little older than Stacy. He smiles at her and nods. "Thanks."

"I nanny for that little girl in the purple shirt." She points out a little Asian girl who looks about three, and Sam kind of thinks it's weird that she's offering up information when it's not like he asked for it. But the little girl is currently hugging Hunter and seems to be nearly squeezing him to death, so maybe it's a little relevant. "She loves it here."

"Yeah, it's nice. It's cool that it's geared toward younger kids."

"I know. There's a toddler fun center on West 86th now. Have you been there? Isabel loves it."

Sam just shakes his head. "No, we're just visiting." He thinks she should be able to tell this by the sneakers currently on his feet, but he doesn't point it out.

"Oh, where are you from?"

"Cincinnati."

"I've been there!" She smiles, and he wonders why anyone would ever be so excited about Cincinnati. He doesn't ask, though, because he knows what's happening. "So is it just you and your boys?"

He's used to this. He's literally been dealing with it for twelve years now. Any time he's alone with his kids, women seem to flock to him. It's like they literally can't help themselves or something, and he doesn't even know why. Being a single dad was honestly the best pick-up tactic he's ever had, and he didn't even have to try. Women would see him with Jake and instantly think he was some kind of highly attractive saint or something. He'd be lying if he said he never took advantage of it. He didn't do it a ton or anything, but sometimes he didn't put up too much of a fight if a woman hinted she wanted to take him to bed. Those probably weren't the high moments of his life, but he never said he was perfect.

Still, he doesn't want this particular girl getting any kind of the wrong idea. He's got a wedding ring on, but maybe he needs to make it clearer. "No, my wife and my other son are here, too."

For what it's worth, this chick does a good job of not showing any kind of surprise or disappointment or any kind of reaction to this. She just keeps the smile on her face and says, "Oh, that sounds like fun!"

"Yeah, we're visiting friends. My wife used to live here." He makes a point to bring Quinn up again, just in case.

And then it's like some crazy coincidence that she actually shows up.

She's a little pink-faced, either slightly sunburned or just hot. Jake's a little sweaty, so Sam assumes they must have walked pretty far. He smiles at them, and Jake immediately sits down beside him on the side not currently occupied by a New York nanny. Quinn pulls her hair off her neck and holds it there for a second, obviously trying to cool down. Sam realizes that she looks very pregnant today; she's been showing for awhile now, but today it's really noticeable. It's probably because she normally wears dresses, so it's less obvious. But since she knew they'd be spending most of the day outside at the park, she's wearing shorts and a tank top today, and her belly seems to be on full display.

She starts telling him about a group of baby ducks they saw headed toward the pond, and Jake interjects his own commentary as he sees fit. Sam feels a little bit awkward because he can feel the nanny watching them, but it's not like they had more than a three sentence conversation. He's actually really thankful when Ethan runs up and hugs himself to Quinn's legs because it means they can move on from the playground. He takes that as his cue and says he'll go wrangle Hunter. It's easy to leave the nanny with a, "Nice to meet you," when he's got all his kids together and can make a break for it.

"Nice to meet you?" Quinn asks calmly as they push the stroller down one of the hundreds of walking trails in this park.

Sam just rolls his eyes. "She thought the kids were cute."

"Oh, so she thought _you _were cute _with _the kids." Quinn's doing that very even voice that's tricky because he can never tell if she's teasing or serious. Whatever, though, it's not like he did anything wrong.

"I _am _cute with my kids."

And then Quinn cracks a smile and shakes her head. "Unfortunately, I know firsthand. That's how you tricked me."

"And now you're stuck."

"I know. It's a tragedy."

"At least I still look good."

"And still as modest as ever."

He smiles at her, and she tries to roll her eyes but doesn't protest too much when he wraps a hand around her hip and tugs her over. She begrudgingly puts an arm around his waist, but it's not until after he makes a point to kiss her forehead that she says, "Your looks definitely help you."

Oh, well. He'll take what he can get.

…

The plan to tire the kids works, and they're all ready for naps by the time they get back to the hotel. Jake even heads straight for bed and seems more than eager to sleep for a couple of hours before they have to go out again.

Quinn, though, immediately starts getting everything ready for the wedding. She pulls her dress out and plugs the steamer out. She gets all the kids' clothes out and gets everything together. She even starts getting Sam's stuff ready even though he's right there and perfectly capable of getting his own things together. But she's just really eager and clearly wants everything to be perfect, considering the fact that she hasn't seen her friends in years and is seeing them tonight after all that time. On top of that, she's coming back as a totally different person than she was when she left- she was single and childless when she left New York, and now she's got a whole family with a husband and several kids in a relatively short amount of time. It's a big change.

He knows it's got to be kind of weird for her. Hell, it was weird just seeing Kurt and Rachel- he kind of felt like he was living in a totally different world than them. They're in this huge major city, both having the careers of their dreams without any kind of other huge responsibilities tying them down. They can go out when they want, do whatever or whoever they want. They don't have to schedule nights out around babysitters or anything like that. Sam literally can't even imagine that because the last time he went out without having to schedule around a babysitter, he was nineteen and drinking out of kegs at random house parties. It's just not something he's ever been able to do. He doesn't regret it, obviously, but sometimes he can't help wondering what it would be like to just have zero responsibilities and be free to just do whatever he wants whenever he wants.

It might be nice, but that's not what he really wants. Or what he ever really wanted.

He's always been idealistic. He was always really different from a lot of other guys, just because he never had any desire to like be a player or anything, even when he was younger. He just always had girlfriends, and that's what he liked. He didn't want to be with a ton of different girls or anything because he always had some picture perfect life in his head where he wanted to get married and have kids and go to work and come home to a nice house in a nice neighborhood with maybe a dog or something. But yeah, that didn't really work out for him so much. He kind of hit a roadblock when he was leaving his freshman comp class and got a text from his girlfriend asking him to come over. He went to her dorm thinking she wanted to go get lunch or something, but he found her still in pajamas with tears on her face and a pregnancy test on her desk.

And then his world kinda just flipped upside down.

He couldn't afford a house and a dog- he literally couldn't afford Chinese takeout without help from his parents and financial aid. None of that stuff he dreamed about was ever going to come true because he messed it all up before it even started. Julia moved back in with her parents after school let out, and Sam found some crappy apartment with the lowest rent he could find. He got two jobs and spent all his time working the front desk at a gym and waiting tables at Olive Garden. He had to explain to his parents why he was staying in Tennessee instead of coming home for the summer, and he had to tell them that they would be getting a grandchild for Christmas. His mom cried forever over it, and his dad exploded in a way that literally made Sam fear for his own safety- it was worse than anything ever was before. Yeah, his parents were strict, and they were really quick to follow through on threats, but they rarely ever _yelled _at him, and if they started, they stopped quickly enough and took a break until they calmed down. But he literally got yelled at for hours that night. His dad told him he was irresponsible and was ruining his life and was basically throwing his whole future away. He said he was disappointed and that Sam wasn't raised that way and how the hell did he expect to take care of a baby when he couldn't even take care of himself. And Sam couldn't say anything back because it was all true, but it also made him feel even worse than he already did.

His parents came around, though. Eventually. They loved him and said they would help where they could, but it wasn't like his parents had a ton of extra money or anything, not to mention the fact that they were in a totally different state. Luckily, though, Julia's parents had plenty of money, and even though they weren't entirely happy with the current situation, either, they still made sure she had everything she needed and still bought a bunch of stuff for the baby. And Sam and Julia both made it through the fall semester of sophomore year, even though Julia was super pregnant and Sam was working seven days a week. And then Jake was born a couple of weeks after exams ended, and things almost started falling into place. Julia still officially lived with her parents, but she spent most of her time in Sam's apartment. It was kind of crappy because Jake had a huge, fancy Noah's Ark nursery at his grandparents', but he spent most nights in a Pack n Play in the corner of that cheap, crappy apartment. And then obviously everything fell apart a few months later, and the Pack n Play got moved from the corner of that crappy apartment to the corner of Sam's tiny bedroom in his parents' house.

That whole house and wife and kids and dog thing didn't seem too likely.

But now he has a house. And a wife. And three kids with another one on the way. He still doesn't have a dog, but that's okay because his little kids would probably find a way to kill it while trying to hug it. He likes his life; he's honestly _happy. _So even though it would occasionally be nice to just do whatever he wants to without a second thought, he's really happy that he can't. It might not be _exactly _like he imagined when he was thinking about it growing up, but it's close enough. And in most ways, it's even better.

He follows Quinn into the bathroom when she goes to start steaming her dress, and he really can't help staring at her because she's rarely dressed like this, and sue him, he happens to think her ass looks really nice in those shorts, so he tells her that.

"Yeah, and I'm sure this maternity waistband is the sexiest thing you've ever seen, right?"

He tells her that the tank top is long enough that he can't really see the waistband, and she throws a cotton ball at his head. "Seriously, though. You look really hot."

Quinn just rolls her eyes. "I look _fat, _but thank you."

He could tell her she's not fat, but she wouldn't listen. Or at least she wouldn't believe him. Instead, he just ignores it and says, "I wish we were alone right now."

"And why's that?" She dabs some makeup remover onto a cotton ball and ignores the way he props himself into a sitting position on the counter.

"Because you're hotness can't be fully appreciated when there are kids just outside that door."

"Your talent for eloquence never fails to amaze me." She rolls her eyes. "And I'm glad you find me attractive today, since you spent last night ogling Rachel Berry."

And… There it is.

He rolls his own eyes because she's crazy. "Trust me, I was not ogling Rachel Berry. I don't even know _how _to ogle." Actually, that's a lie because he got a pretty good lesson from his mini-me last night, considering the fact that even after being warned that girls don't like people staring at their boobs, Jake couldn't manage to keep his eyes anywhere else when they went back to Kurt's. Yeah, not awkward at all.

"So you're telling me you don't think Rachel is hot?" It's a trick question, and he's really not sure why they're on the topic of Rachel Berry anyway. Although, in a way, he's not really that surprised. Quinn's always been a little bit obsessed with Rachel, so it's not all that shocking that she apparently falls right back into that when she sees her for the first time in more than a decade.

"She's pretty." He shrugs like he doesn't care. "She looks the same as she always did."

He thought that was playing it safe. Apparently he was wrong.

Quinn gives him this little glare and then tugs the elastic out of her ponytail. "Of course she does. She still has the body of an eighteen year old because she's never had to deal with getting fat from growing a human being inside of her." Sam's head falls back against the mirror. He's super awesome at saying the exact worst thing, and now Quinn's on a tangent. "Let alone four. Hell, I didn't even have that body when I _was _eighteen, so I'm not surprised that you're so enamored."

"Are you done?" She looks at him like she wants to kill him, but he ignores it and just sits up. "Rachel's pretty. You're _gorgeous." _He gets an eye roll in response, and he honestly expects it, so it's not like he's surprised. "You're seriously the most beautiful woman on this whole freaking planet." Quinn gives him a look like she doesn't believe him, but it's the truth. He's always thought that, ever since he was like fifteen. It's just the truth. He grabs her hand and tugs her so that she's standing between his knees. "Everything about you is perfect."

"I think your definition of perfect is flawed. Ironically."

But he shakes his head and slides back to a standing position. "No, it's not. You're perfect." He pulls his t-shirt over his head and drops it under the sink. Quinn's probably going to bitch at him, but he cuts her off before she can start. "Now, you wanna save some time and share a shower?"

"I'm pretty sure your definition of saving time is also flawed. That would probably be very counter-productive."

"Whatever. All I know is that the kids are all asleep, and we probably have a good thirty minutes before they start waking up. So less talking, more naked."

Quinn laughs a little bit and rolls her eyes. He's not surprised.

She's never been able to resist his charm.

…

Quinn is accosted literally the second they walk into the church.

Some woman in a bridesmaid's dress comes running across the lobby and throws herself at her, and the way they both squeal almost makes Sam wince. When they finally decide it's safe to stop hugging, Quinn makes a hurried effort to introduce her family to Jen, who is apparently Danielle's sister, and despite the fact that Sam has literally never heard of Jen before, she is apparently one of Quinn's nearest, dearest friends.

And that's kind of how the whole night goes.

Quinn gets pulled away before the wedding even starts and disappears with a couple of bridesmaids who apparently take her to wherever the bride is, and she stays gone until just a few minutes before the ceremony starts. Sam, meanwhile, sits with the kids and tries to keep them still and separated enough so that no fights break out. There are maybe three other children here total, so he feels pretty out of place, and he's glad when Quinn finally decides to remember them and shows back up.

He has to give it to his kids- they behave pretty well through the whole thing. Apparently church has them trained enough so that they know to be quiet and sit relatively still. It also probably doesn't hurt that they're still kind of tired out from the day, even post-nap.

The reception is kind of annoying, though, mostly because Quinn once again decides that running off seems like a good idea. He doesn't blame her or anything because he knows these are her friends and that she hasn't seen them in a really long time, but it's awkward just sitting there and not knowing anyone else. He gets pulled into a conversation with an elderly couple who are sitting at the same table. They're apparently the groom's great-uncle and aunt, and Sam has a hard time getting anything coherent out of them, given the fact that they're probably like a hundred and fifty or something. They're nice people, though, and the lady helps Ethan when he can't reach his drink. But it's gets pretty boring pretty fast, and Sam's really glad when Quinn finally shows back up.

She's got the bride with her this time and two other women who are also apparently really close friends. Sam gets introduced to all of them, and he feels kind of awkward because he can tell they're judging him and probably thinking that Quinn could (and should) do better. It's not like he didn't already know that, but it's even more obvious being here around all these people who clearly live much more glamorous lives and obviously all have plenty of money. He can't help feeling like he pretty much stole Quinn away from all this or something, and he doesn't miss how happy and at home she seems here. She has _friends _here, and she doesn't have that at home.

He's sure she misses it.

Hunter jumps up immediately to show Quinn the mini bottle of champagne bubbles that he picked up as a wedding souvenir. Quinn does her best to be interested, and she picks him up to meet her friends. Hunter's a much milder tempered kid than Ethan is, but he's also a lot shyer. It takes a lot to get him out of his shell, so Sam's honestly surprised when Danielle holds out her hands to take him and Hunter goes right to her. He's obviously kind of mesmerized by her headpiece, so they don't really get much conversation out of him. What's more surprising is when one of the other women sits down at the table and actually starts up a conversation with Jake. She's apparently fluent in ASL or something because she jumps right in, and Jake looks shy and a little confused at first, but he eventually starts answering her when she asks him what grade he's in and how he likes New York. Quinn catches Sam's eye and smiles a little bit right before Danielle asks Hunter if he's excited to have a sister.

She gets a loud, "_No," _for an answer, and everybody starts laughing even though it probably doesn't bode well for the coming months.

Quinn says she wants to dance with him probably a half hour later right when the kids are really starting to open up to some of her friends. She obviously doesn't have any problem leaving them where they are, so Sam guesses it can't hurt to sneak away for a couple of minutes. Plus, he's barely even talked to Quinn since they got here.

It's a huge reception, bigger than most of the ones Sam's been to. It also looks like it cost a lot more than anything he's used to, which isn't surprising given the fact that the wedding itself looked like it probably cost more than most weddings Sam's attended put together. His own sure as hell wasn't like this. It was actually just a really small church wedding with a pretty casual backyard reception. Their family was there and a few friends, and that was pretty much it. It was as low-key as possible. Their moms made the centerpieces, and the mom of one of Stacy's friends did the catering. It was simple and nice, and he kind of loved it. But maybe Quinn would have liked something more.

"Do you wish we had a big wedding like this?"

Quinn looks at him like he's crazy and tightens her arms around his neck. "We don't even _know _this many people. I sure as hell wouldn't want to try entertaining them."

"You seem really happy here."

"I love it here."

Sam tries not to put too much weight onto that. It's obvious that she loves it here- who wouldn't? But it hits him just a little that she probably still misses living here, at least on some level. He tries to change the subject a little.

"Your friends think I'm a hick or something." One of her friends asked him to repeat the same sentence five times and then giggled about how she just liked hearing his 'accent.'

Quinn rolls her eyes. "That's just Kim. She's from New Jersey, you can't pay any attention to her." He's not sure what that has to do with New Jersey, but whatever.

"You miss New York a lot, don't you?"

Quinn shrugs a little and moves just a tiny bit closer to him. "It's an awesome place to live, but moving to Cincinnati was the best decision I ever made."

"Aww…" He grins at her in a totally overly-exaggerated way, and she just nods.

"Yeah, my job is _so _much better than what I was doing at the Met."

"Ha, ha. You should leave the jokes to me. I'm funnier."

"You _think _you're funnier. Most people disagree."

"What people?"

"The world."

He just gives her a little scowl. "You're really bad for self-esteem."

"And you're really good! I feel a lot better now that I've got everyone staring. I _definitely _brought the hottest date to this thing, so thanks."

She's teasing, but she's also not. And he knows it. Apparently it's okay for her friends to think he's some backwoods loser as long as they think he's hot.

"I feel a little bit like you're exploiting me for my body."

Quinn lifts one shoulder but smiles sweetly at him. "I'm pretty sure you love me anyway."

"I love you more in this dress because your boobs look _awesome." _He doesn't even hide the fact that he's staring straight at them. Contrary to what he told Jake, sometimes staring is okay. Occasionally.

Quinn just shakes her head. "You're really lucky you're attractive, you know that?"

He just shrugs. It's gotten him this far, so he must be doing okay.

…

A/N: Sorry this one took a little longer… Internet issues. Thanks to everyone who reviewed so far!


	10. Chapter 10

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 10**

…

So New York was awesome, and it was pretty much exactly what they needed.

The kids are still talking about it a week after they get home, and Jake spends more time looking at his pictures of the trip than he does just about anything else. Sam's glad for that above all else. He's been worried about Jake for awhile now- worried because he'll be fine for a little while and then just completely flip and turn into some kind of unrecognizable preteen monster. It's crazy, and Sam never really expected it to be this hard. He probably should have, but he didn't. All he knows is that he loves it when Jake's being normal and happy like the kid he used to be instead of this crazy mix of hormones and life changes or whatever.

And it's probably a little selfish, but there's this tiny part of him that just kind of misses how things used to be.

Not that he would trade his life for anything in the whole world or anything, but it's different now. A lot different than it was just a few years ago. Things were a lot harder then, when he was trying to make ends meet with just one paycheck and more bills than incoming funds. But in some ways, it was also a lot easier. It was just him and Jake, and that's really all he had to think about. He possibly spent too _much _time thinking about it, but oh, well. Minus the rare night out with his friends or the even rarer one-night stand, he basically spent all of his time either working or at home with his son. He and Jake did everything together, and Jake got one-hundred percent of his attention. It was just them against the world, and even though it was sometimes really hard, it was also really awesome.

Jake was just like _everything _for a really long time. He and Sam did everything together, and it was awesome to have this little person who wanted him and needed him and who answered _'my dad' _on a first-grade worksheet question of _My best friend is _. _

Sam remembers the first time he got to hold him just like it was yesterday. He'd been around infants before, and he still has a clear memory of being eight and sitting down in an armchair in his mom's hospital room as his dad carefully putting his newborn brother on his lap- or two years later when he actually got to stand up and hold Stacy. But it was so different with Jake. He'd spent months before that freaking out and worrying and kind of dreading that exact moment, but the second the doctor handed him that squirming little baby, it was literally like the whole world stopped turning and the only thing that mattered was screaming at him with way too much power for what had to be tiny little lungs.

Something like that changes your whole life.

So it's a little rough now trying to cope with the fact that what was once a squirming, screaming little ball of baby is now almost a teenager with too much attitude and enough eye-rolling to last a lifetime. It's nice when he's just sweet and normal and doesn't go around acting like he hates his life and wants to kill everyone in it. But still. Jake might be behaving better post-New York, but Sam's more convinced than ever that he's actually growing up and that that's even scarier than he thought it would be. The whole puberty thing isn't something he particularly wants to deal with, and if he could just hit the pause button or something, he'd keep it so that Jake just stayed where he is forever and never actually hit that point. But obviously that's not realistic, so he probably just needs to accept it and start figuring out how to handle it.

He can't imagine how he's ever supposed to be comfortable enough to just sit his twelve year old down and start talking about sex. He doesn't want his twelve year old to even know about sex, much less think that it's okay to be having it. But it's unrealistic to think that Jake's not going to know about it or be curious. He probably already knows plenty, and he's obviously curious enough if the way he was mesmerized by a pair of naked breasts is any indication. And it's normal, okay? Sam knows that, and he's okay with it. He's not going to freak out just because Jake's curious or wants to look at stuff like that because it's normal, and really, who _doesn't _want to look at stuff like that?

But that doesn't mean he's comfortable with the idea of _talking _about it.

They've talked about it a little, mostly in relation to how babies are born. There was really no way of getting around that one, but it was easy enough to explain the most basic, non-descript way possible. Going beyond that, though, is a scary thought. He was serious when he told Quinn that he never had that kind of talk with his dad, so it's not like he has anything to go on. The only thing his dad ever told him was that he shouldn't involve himself in a sexual relationship until he was mature enough to deal with the consequences, so it kind of felt like karma when he ended up with a living, breathing consequence. But just because he and his dad never really talked about sex doesn't mean they didn't talk about other things. When Sam got his first girlfriend (Quinn, ironically), his dad told him that he had to respect girls and that he should never pressure them to do anything they didn't want to do and that he should be nice and polite and always hold doors open and that he should never let a girl pay for herself no matter what and that he should always compliment girls and tell them when they were looking beautiful. And when he brought Quinn home for the first time, his dad had patted him on the back later that night and told him that he was playing way out of his league. It took awhile for Sam to figure out what that meant, and he'd be lying if he said he wasn't the tiniest bit smug now that he's married to her. Hell, he's probably still playing out of his league, but at least he's got it on lockdown.

But it's not just about girls and sex and all that stuff. It's about puberty in general, and yeah, to be honest, sex is probably still several years off, but puberty is coming up fast whether anybody likes it or not. And it sucks, okay? Sam knows that and remembers it well, and it's not like it's fun. It _sucks. _It's weird and gross and even kind of scary, so it's probably his responsibility to try and make it as least traumatizing as possible if he can help it at all.

He just has to figure out how to do that.

…

He comes home from work one night and finds the little kids running around the living room half-dressed like they're supposed to be getting ready for a bath or something but somehow got distracted or forgotten.

Hunter runs up to him the second he makes it through the door and shouts that he used the potty, and Sam gives him a high five because going potty is basically always cause for a celebration in this house. He's just about to ask where their mommy is, but he hears her calling from the back of the house before he gets a chance.

"Sam?"

From the direction of her voice, he assumes she's in the bathroom, so he starts walking that way. He's right, too, and he finds the bathroom door standing open with both Quinn and Jake inside. Quinn looks really worried about something, and she doesn't even say hello before she says, "Look at this," and pulls Jake's t-shirt up around his chest. There are little red blisters scattered randomly over his stomach, and Quinn spins him around and shows off the fact that the blisters apparently spread to his back as well.

"What is that?" Sam leans a little bit closer to get a better look.

"It looks like chickenpox."

That's Sam's initial thought as well, but… "He had the vaccine."

"Well, what else could it be? Isn't that what it looks like?"

"I guess… I've never had it."

"You've never had chickenpox?" Quinn looks at him like he's crazy.

"No, have you?"

"When I was little, yeah." She looks at Jake again. "If you've never had them, you don't need to be around him."

"Do _you?" _Yeah, he knows you're supposedly immune to it after you get it or whatever, but she's kind of pregnant with his baby, so he wants to be as careful as possible.

"You can't get it more than once." Quinn finally lets Jake's shirt fall back down and feels his forehead. "He's got a fever, too."

"Let me call my mom." Sam knows it's probably pathetic, but calling his mom is still his go-to fix for just about any problem or issue. He can't help it.

Quinn tells Jake to hang on and then she follows Sam back out the living room where he dropped his phone. She does a good job of ignoring the babies running around and squealing while Sam waits for his mom to pick up.

"Hello?"

"Hey. What're you doing?"

"Finishing up dinner. What's up?"

He lets out a little sigh because this isn't something he wants to be dealing with. Preferably ever. "I think Jake has chickenpox."

"He had the vaccine."

Sam can't help rolling his eyes because he's not _that _much of an idiot that he doesn't know his own kids' medical histories. He actually knows that stuff really well. He knows every shot, every allergy, every illness- he pays attention, okay? So he's not sure why his mom's pointing out the obvious.

"I know that. But can't he get it anyway? Like isn't there a small chance or something?"

"I guess. Are you sure it's chickenpox?"

"It's these little red bumps all over his chest and his back. And he's got a fever."

"Is he sick?"

He doesn't _look _particularly sick, but Sam asks Quinn anyway, and says, "He told me his throat was sore."

"His throat hurts."

He hears his mom sigh a little bit. "If it's chickenpox, you don't need to be around him. You've never had it." Apparently his mom thinks that not only does he not know his kids' medical histories, but that he's also unaware of his own. "And Quinn doesn't need to be, either."

"She already had it."

"Well, it still can't be good. You don't want to risk it."

"What about Ethan and Hunter?"

"They had the vaccine, too, so they're probably okay. But even if they got it, it's usually pretty mild in young kids. It can be really dangerous in adults, though."

"Well, what are we supposed to do? Lock him in his room and feed him through a flap in the door?"

"It's really your only option."

"What?"

"Sam. Pack the child a bag, and I will come pick him up."

"Awesome! You are definitely the best mom I ever had."

He can practically hear her shaking her head.

He does as she says, though, and starts packing a bag while Quinn takes the little kids for the bath they were obviously in the middle of getting ready for. He hears his mom pull up about twenty minutes later, and he unlocks the door for her. It's kind of late, so he's not surprised to see that she's in sweats and makeup-less, but it also affirms the fact that she really _is _the coolest. Jake obviously agrees because he shows up looking significantly sicker. Five minutes ago, he was eating a popsicle and playing video games, but he's suddenly extremely pitiful and sickly. No surprise that it's just in time for Nana who, unsurprisingly, plays right into it whether she knows it's mostly faked or not. She checks him out, though, and confirms that it's chickenpox, once again saying how crazy it is that he got it even after the vaccine.

Sam rolls his eyes a little bit when his mom sits down to wait for the babies' bath to be over and Jake climbs right into the chair with her. He swings his legs across her lap and leans his head back right beside hers, and then he starts twirling her hair around his finger just like he's done since he was literally a baby. It's funny in a way but also kind of ridiculous because he doesn't act anything close to that with anybody else, but with her, he can turn instantly into a little boy who needs to be cuddled and babied, and it's definitely not like she does anything to discourage it. It's not like she deliberately plays favorites or anything- she'll baby any of the kids at any given moment- but it's just a little bit different with Jake. They've just always had a really close bond, and she was the main female presence in his life for a really long time. He was also the _first _grandchild and one that she felt needed a lot of special attention, both because of his disability and also because he didn't have a mother. It's hard to explain, but that's just how it's always been. And Sam knows a lot of it is just because they lived with his parents until Jake was four, so all of his early developmental years were spent with her right there. She was there making him breakfast every morning, kissing him goodnight every night, and doing everything in between. But it's just kind of funny that Jake's apparently never grown out of that.

Sam goes and gets the bag and asks Jake what games he wants to take with him. Jake just dictates back what he wants and can't be bothered to actually get up and get anything for himself. Apparently he is too sick to move. Or something.

Sam nearly gets knocked down on his way back to the living room by a naked two year old who is streaking through the house with wet hair and dripping water all over the floor. Quinn's screaming after him a second later, ordering him back to the bathroom, but Hunter totally ignores her and runs right to the chair where his brother and grandmother are. Sam gets there just in time to see Jake knee him in the head to keep him from climbing up, which, of course, just makes Hunter yell like somebody's trying to kill him.

Sam gives Jake a look that goes totally unacknowledged, and then he grabs Hunter and picks him up. "Why are you naked? Where are your clothes, kid?"

Hunter apparently is not in the mood for joking because he instantly starts kicking and screaming to be put down. Quinn shows up at that exact moment looking pissed off. Ethan's already in pajamas, but she's looking at Hunter like she wants to strangle him or something. "Come put your clothes on." Her tone of voice clearly says she's not playing, but Hunter obviously doesn't care.

He just looks at her and yells a very solid, "No!" that doesn't do anything but make her look even angrier.

Sam knows it's probably safest if he just handles it, and since he's already got a good grip on Hunter, he just says he'll get him dressed and ignores the way Hunter keeps screaming and crying. He's in full meltdown mode, and Sam might be a little embarrassed if there was anyone but his mom around, but she sees his kids act like crazy fools on a regular basis. It's not like this is anything new.

Hunter is no easy job right now, though, and Sam literally has to hold him down just to get a diaper on him. Getting his pajamas on him is another feat altogether, and after the fourth dodged kick while trying to get Hunter into pants, Sam finally grabs his foot and tells him to stop. It doesn't work, and Hunter keeps kicking and being uncooperative, and Sam eventually just tells him he's going to the corner if he doesn't stop acting like that. This causes a whole other set of issues, and Sam seriously thinks about dumping holy water on his kid or something because he's clearly possessed. It takes another five minutes of screaming and fighting until he finally gets his pajamas on, and Hunter screams a very hateful, _"No!" _the second his shirt's over his head and Sam tells him to calm down.

It's over then. Sam's had it, and there's no way he's just going to let some temper tantrum carry on for this long without following through some kind of consequence, so he moves Hunter to a relatively empty spot by his wall and tells him to sit in time out until he can calm down. This is not successful in the least, and Hunter's fit goes up by about ten degrees where he screams and yells and tells Sam how mean he is over and over, and it gets tiring really fast. Sam's not in the mood to negotiate, though, and he finally literally has to force him into a sitting position. And even though he hates having to resort to that, it works, and Hunter stays seated. He isn't done with the dramatics, though, and he hiccups his way through giant crocodile tears the whole time until he finally stops crying and is just left with deep, ragged breaths.

Sam sits down beside him. "Are you calmed down now?" He gets a shaky nod and the saddest little face he's ever seen in response. "Good. Buddy, you don't need to get so worked up. It's not nice, okay?" Hunter's biting on his lips and still looking really upset, so Sam picks him up and manages to stand back up himself. Hunter's got both arms around his neck and his face in his shoulder, and he can tell he's still crying a little bit. He's also very sure that most of this behavior is triggered almost totally by exhaustion. "You need to go to bed."

Hunter gives a pitiful little, "No," without lifting his head, and Sam actually feels kind of bad for him. The only other word he manages to get out is, "Nana..." and Sam rubs his back a little bit.

"We'll go see Nana, but then it's bedtime."

He hopes Jake's more willing to share than he was a few minutes ago because he's really not sure he can make it through another hysterical meltdown. Seriously, kids that little should not be able to make that much noise.

It's crazy.

…

Unfortunately, Sam realizes pretty quickly that it's not only his kids who get into messes too big for them.

He's on his way to work when he gets a text from his brother asking if he'll call him when he gets a chance. That in itself is weird because while Sam considers himself to be relatively close to both his brother and his sister, none of them are big phone talkers. They either text, or they just see each other in person. The only time any of them really talk on the phone is when they have something super specific to say or ask, so Sam checks the time and decides to go ahead and call.

His brother lives in Louisville, actually just a couple of miles from his sister. They both went to college there, and neither left afterward. While, Stacy's still looking for a real job and making coffee in the meantime, Stevie's got an entry-level job at some insurance company. From what Sam can tell, he does alright, but it's not like he's doing some dream job he loves or anything. But that's just real life, isn't it?

It doesn't take long to get through all the small talk and BS chit-chat before Sam finds out the real reason behind the phone call. There's a relatively long pause after a dumb question about the Reds, and then Stevie swallows and says, "Do you think I could borrow some money?"

It's not like it's a totally random question. He's loaned money here and there to both his siblings since they've left home, mostly because he knows how hard it is trying to make it on your own, and he knows that neither of them have super awesome jobs or anything. He also gave them money all the time when they were in high school, basically whenever they needed something and would ask. A lot of that still just comes from some deep-rooted need to support his siblings because he still feels this overwhelming sense of responsibility that he probably shouldn't still be hanging onto but can't let go. It's hard to just get over that when he spent his _own _teenage years working his ass off just to make sure they had shoes that fit and all the supplies on their school lists. He specifically remembers the very first time he ever took his clothes off for money- it's not something he's particularly proud of, but he was pretty desperate. And he tries really hard not to hold any kind of resentment toward his parents or anything because he knows it wasn't their fault. It's not like they told him to go do that- they still to this day don't know he's ever even stepped foot inside a strip club. And he knows they didn't cause any of that stuff to happen, it was just one bad thing after another. But still, he was just a teenager, and he would never want his kids to ever feel that kind of pressure because it was rough and made him grow up a lot faster than he ever would have wanted. That kind of pressure and responsibility is also something he's never been able to totally shake…

Which is probably why he still can't say no to his siblings.

"How much?" It's not like he has a ton of extra money or anything, but he's also not going to let his little brother starve, either.

He's more than a little bit shocked when there's a huge pause and then, "Four thousand dollars…"

It's a good thing there's bumper to bumper traffic or Sam would probably wreck the car. He's _not _expecting that. He's expecting something more along the lines of a hundred and fifty bucks to keep the lights on and buy bread and PB until the next paycheck. Not _four thousand dollars!_

"What the hell, dude!"

"I know." He can tell just from his voice that Stevie's scared or worried or nervous or something. Probably because he knows nobody in their right mind calls somebody up and asks for four grand. "I know it's a lot."

"What the hell do you need four thousand dollars for?"

There's another really long pause, and Sam's just about to call him out on it, but he finally answers. "I kind of got in trouble."

That doesn't sound good at all, and it's not really surprising that the very first thought that hits Sam's mind is that he needs bail money or something. And seriously? He's going to kick his ass if he's done something stupid enough to land himself in jail. "What did you do?"

"I just made a bet and didn't win. And now I have to come up with this money, and I don't have it."

"A bet? What kind of a bet?" At least it's not jail, but… What the hell for real?

"Well, it was more like… Well, it _was _a bet. But the horse didn't win, and it wasn't so much like an above ground kind of bet… But I thought I was gonna win. I just, I have to pay it." He's rambling, and Sam wonders if he knows how stupid he sounds right now.

"I don't have four thousand dollars."

"I'll pay you back! I swear." This, of course, is an empty promise because Sam has yet to see a dime from either one of his siblings to pay back money loaned. Not like he's going to force them or anything, but it's not exactly like he believes them when they always promise to pay him back.

"I don't-"

"_Please, _Sam… I have to pay them…"

"My kids have to eat, man."

"I know. I know… I just don't- I have to pay it, and I don't know who else to ask."

Sam doesn't know what to even think at the moment. He's literally shaking his head even though there's nobody around to see it. "I have to talk to Quinn." He shouldn't even entertain the idea, but it's his little brother, and… And he just has to.

"She'll say no."

"Well, I can't just do it without telling her."

"Just forget it. I'll just figure something out."

"I said I'll talk to her."

He hears a sigh like that's the wrong answer or something, but seriously? He can't just magically give away four thousand dollars and expect his wife not to notice. That's crazy.

"Don't tell Mom and Dad, okay?"

…

So it turns out that telling Quinn goes exactly like Sam expects it to. _Badly._

She flat-out refuses and tells Sam he's an idiot for even pretending like it might be a possibility and that there's no way in hell they're giving his brother that much money. Sam gets a little defensive and tries (and fails) to make excuses. He pulls out the fact that Stevie doesn't make that much money and has trouble even making ends meet. Quinn, of course, is too logical for that kind of argument and points out that he shouldn't be wasting money on gambling. There's a tiny bit of a fight, but Sam gives up pretty fast because it's not like she's wrong. It's also not like he's ever going to get her to change her mind.

He just happens to make the mistake of calling his brother back while Quinn's at home.

That's when things go totally crazy, and it honestly takes him totally by surprise. She's in the kitchen cutting up apple slices for the kids, and Sam's outside trying to get the grill ready for dinner. He doesn't expect anything crazy to happen, so he uses that opportunity to call his brother and tell him that they can't loan him the money. Stevie doesn't argue or anything. He just still sounds pretty nervous and says he understands. And that should be that, right? _Wrong._

Quinn's been in one of those stressed out moods lately that's only heightened by her hormones, and Sam would be lying if he said she wasn't downright scary at times. Like today. She comes out to ask when the grill's going to be ready, but she cuts herself off and kind of glares at him when she figures out mid-conversation who he's talking to.

"Is that Stevie?"

Sam nods and just tries to kind of ignore her. It doesn't work even a little bit, and apparently she's just crazy enough at the moment to fly completely off the handle because she grabs the phone away from him and decides to start telling him exactly how she feels.

"I can't believe you've got the nerve to try and guilt us into that kind of money… … You are stupid! You are twenty-four years old! Grow up!" Sam tries to get the phone back, but she slaps him away and turns around. "No, _you're _the selfish one! You're crazy if you think you're going to take food away from _my _kids because you're too much of a child to handle your own messes… … Don't talk to me like that! You need to grow up and take some kind of responsibility for your own stupid actions!"

"Quinn-"

She cuts him off and totally ignores him, still hell-bent on chewing his little brother out. "You need to learn something about consequences because you are too old to be pulling this kind of bullshit! Don't you _ever _pull something like this again and try to get _us _to bail you out. You want to make stupid choices? Live with the consequences!"

Sam finally gets the phone back when she shoves it at him and stomps back into the house. She also shoots him this glare like this whole thing is his fault or something, and he's not really sure what he did except relay a question from his brother. He didn't make any promises or anything, but now that it's down to it, he's kind of worried about how his brother's supposed to get that kind of money.

"Hey," he says, set to apologize for Quinn's sudden outburst. "Sorry, she's just-"

His brother cuts him off before he can offer any kind of excuse. "Your wife's an evil bitch."

"Hey." It's a warning because he's not going to listen to that, and Stevie knows better. "Don't."

Apparently he doesn't care today, though. "Why? You're just pissed because you know I'm right, and you're stuck and can't do anything about it."

Sam really wants to give him the benefit of the doubt- assume that he's just upset about a bunch of stuff and pushed over the edge by Quinn yelling at him- so he tries to be rational. "You need to watch it."

But it's all out the window or something. Obviously everybody has gone crazy or something because now his brother's just over the top. "She's a bitch, and you know it! Why can't you just grow some balls and make your own decisions for once? Nice to know you're supposed to be a man, but you still have to ask permission from your wife for every single thing you do. I'm surprised you're allowed to take a shit on your own."

Sam does his very best to stay calm, but he's really starting to get pissed now. "Look, you need to watch your mouth, okay? You shouldn't be talking about any woman like that, but you especially don't go around disrespecting the ones in your own family. And Quinn's not wrong, either. You're too old to be getting into shit like this."

"Whatever." It's a common response to any question or accusation that somebody doesn't want to acknowledge, and Sam's not too shocked to hear it here. It doesn't stop without some kind of added dramatics, though. "Just forget about it, okay? It's obvious you don't give a crap about me, so don't worry, I won't bother you and your perfect little Stepford family again." Sam can literally hear one of his kids singing a song about poop from inside the house and another one throwing a giant fit about how he only likes green apples and won't eat red ones, so he's not really sure how anybody would ever accuse them of being Stepford, but okay… His brother goes right on anyway, so it's not even like it matters. "So thanks a fucking lot, and have fun trying to get your balls back from that bitch you married."

Sam opens his mouth, ready to finally just go off, but he hears a click, and his phone starts blinking with a disconnected call. He's so pissed right now that he doesn't even know what to do. He's pissed at his brother for being an asshole, and he's pissed at Quinn for butting in like he's incapable of handling anything on his own. He's also pissed at the whole situation because he shouldn't have to be put in the position of having to clean up his brother's messes or play mediator when his wife decides she needs to go around sharing her opinions to his family. So he just slams the lid shut on the grill and goes back inside.

He narrowly misses a car that comes zooming past him and slams into the wall on his way to the kitchen. Quinn and Ethan are in there going head to head over the apple situation, and Quinn's obviously out of patience or something because she looks like she's on the verge of committing toddler murder or something. Sam's not feeling too particularly patient at the moment, either, so he grabs a bowl of apple slices and shoves it at Ethan. "Stop it," he says firmly. "You either eat this, or you don't eat anything."

Ethan gives him this hateful little look for about three seconds, and then he promptly throws the bowl right at him. It crashes to the floor, and apple slices go everywhere. Sam is not even close to being in the mood to dealing with this right now, so he just picks him up and takes him straight to his room, totally ignoring his protests. He puts him down on the bed and tells him he better not move until he gets back. He must sound serious enough to be scary or something because Ethan just looks at him and doesn't argue. He also makes no move to disobey when Sam leaves and shuts the door behind him. Hunter's still playing with cars in the hallway and tries to get Sam's attention, but he just barely acknowledges him before heading back to the kitchen.

Quinn's cleaning up the mess and dumping the rest of the apples into the trash. She looks on the verge of tears or something, probably overly frustrated and stressed, but Sam feels the exact same way, so he doesn't have much sympathy. "Did you really have to lay into him like that?"

She rolls her eyes and goes to wash her hands. "He's a grown man. I already have enough children to worry about, I'm not taking on another one who should be old enough to know better."

"You could have just let me handle it."

"So you could apologize over and over because we work all day every day and don't have enough leftover money to hand out to your idiot brother?" He just kind of glares at her, but she shoots one right back. "I swear to God, Sam, you better not give him one penny. I mean it."

There's plenty he wants to say, but he doesn't. He's too pissed to deal with this right now. He's also still too pissed to deal with Ethan, so he just goes back outside and finishes up getting the grill ready.

Yeah, right. Everything about his life is _so _Stepford.

…

A/N: Thanks for the reviews on the last chapter! I'm glad y'all are still interested.


	11. Chapter 11

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 11**

…

Sundays are always the most stressful day of the week despite the fact that nobody has to be at work bright and early.

But while they may get to sleep in just a little bit, the stress of getting everyone ready definitely overpowers the luxuries. It's even more stressful now that Quinn's starting to get more noticeably pregnant because it's taking her longer than usual to get herself ready for some unknown reason. That means, of course, that Sam basically has to get the kids ready on his own. He gets breakfast ready before he even wakes the kids up because it's just easier to deal with them when he doesn't have to find some sort of entertainment to keep them occupied while they're waiting to eat. It's a lot easier if he can just wake them up, sit them down at the table, and feed them immediately, so that's exactly what he does.

Hunter and Ethan both make it to the table through half-open eyes (Ethan has to be carried), but they start waking up when they find yogurt and bananas waiting for them. It's possibly a pretty bad plan, considering the fact that he's basically setting himself up to be cleaning yogurt from every inch of the table, the surrounding floor, _and _both kids, but they like it, so he'll take his chances. It also keeps them distracted long enough so that he can go wake Jake up, which somehow takes about twice as long on average.

Jake has never been easy to wake up. For one, he's deaf, so no amount of yelling or threats have any kind of effect whatsoever. He has to literally be shaken awake, and he's never too eager to cooperate. The only things that get him to wake up easily are trips to King's Island (and that doesn't really work so much anymore) and Christmas morning. Other than that, he fights tooth and nail to stay asleep in all circumstances. He's actually got a special alarm clock that vibrates his pillow, but he sleeps right through it- he just hates waking up.

Today is no exception, of course, and when Sam shakes him enough to get a reaction, Jake pushes him away and rolls away with the blanket pulled tighter around him. This is fairly normal protocol for waking up, but they don't really have time for it this morning. They're already kind of running behind, and Sam still has to get both the little kids dressed _and _get himself ready. It'd be nice if his almost teenager could show a little bit of self-sufficiency and actually take care of himself.

He shakes him again and then three more times before Jake finally makes some terrible face and opens his eyes. He blinks at the light and then lazily signs something Sam doesn't even understand. He tells Jake he doesn't get it, and all he gets in reply is an eye roll. Sam just looks at him until he finally signs it again, and that time Sam gets it. Jake says he doesn't want to go to church and that he wants to stay home. Sam asks why, and Jake answers that he doesn't like it and doesn't want to go.

It's not the best reason, but it's something Sam's kind of been expecting for awhile. Jake doesn't have the best opportunities in church as far as understanding things goes, and even if he did, he's getting to an age where it's normal to start questioning things and being less enthusiastic. His very first initial instinct is to ignore all of that, channel his own father, and tell Jake to get up and be ready to walk out the door in half an hour _or else, _but then he thinks better of it. Maybe he should double think it, but he's not really sure he needs to.

He tells Jake that's fine, that he doesn't have to go to church but that he needs to get up soon because he can't just sleep all day.

Jake is surprised- that much is evident by the way he looks at Sam in confusion. Obviously he expected to be ordered out of bed, but Jake's old enough now that he deserves to be able to make some of his own decisions. And this is a good place to start. When Jake finally realizes he's not joking, he nods quickly and then sits up like he's actually going to start getting out of bed.

Sam can hear that the shower is off, so he sneaks a peek at the babies and sees that they're both still thoroughly enjoying their yogurt by getting it on every possible surface within reach, but it looks harmless enough, so he heads off to his own bedroom to see if he can grab his own shower while the kids are still occupied.

Quinn's in the adjoining bathroom, already dressed and with her makeup done. Her hair is still wet, though, and she takes it out of the towel right about the same time Sam gets to the bathroom.

"What are the kids doing?"

"Making a mess." It's as good of an answer as any and pretty much sums up their current situation perfectly. Quinn doesn't seem fazed in the least.

"Is Jake up?"

"He wants to stay home."

Quinn laughs a little while she combs out her hair. Sam's not really sure what's so funny, but she says, "That's nice," like he's joking or something.

"I told him he could."

She stops combing then and just looks at him. "So you're just going to let him skip church because he's lazy?"

"I'm not going to _force _him to do stuff he doesn't want to do."

"So when he decides he's going to stay home from school, you're just going to be cool with that?"

Sam rolls his eyes a little. "That's different. He should have a choice about church."

"He's _twelve. _When he turns eighteen, he can make all the choices he wants."

"He's old enough to start making his own decisions."

"Or we could make his decisions for him… Since he is a _child." _She's speaking really slowly and in that tone that lets him know she thinks he's a dumbass. "We're his parents, so we have that privilege. That's kind of how it works."

Sam doesn't really want to get into a fight about this, but he's serious about wanting Jake to make his own decisions. Yes, religion is very important to him, but he wants that to be something that his children _choose _to believe- not something they just believe because that's what they're told and are too scared to question it. He's very thankful that Jake's been exposed to Christianity through his school, and he's done his best to give him as much exposure as possible. But if Jake doesn't want to sit in Sunday School or sit through a sermon he literally can't even follow, Sam's not going to force him. His parents forced him to church every week for his entire life, and while he never actually resented it or anything, there were plenty of times when he would have liked to have some say so. And religion was so forced in their house that it kind of backfired where his brother and sister are concerned because neither one of them goes to church or seems to care too much about any of that stuff despite the fact that their parents literally had them in church three times a week their whole lives.

In fact, his parents are probably going to have something to say about him letting Jake stay home, but whatever. They're awesome parents, and he had a great childhood, but that doesn't mean he's got to follow their parenting book down to the letter. No matter what, Jake is ultimately his responsibility, and Sam knows it's not up to his parents to decide how he should be raised. There are plenty of things that he does differently from his parents, and he's sure they probably have plenty to say about that, too, but he's his own person, and he wants to raise his kids the way _he _thinks they should be raised. His parents were much, _much _stricter than Sam's ever been_, _and his dad was intimidating enough to invoke fear with just one little look… Sam's pretty sure that he has to nearly lose it all the way before any of his kids are even worried, much less scared. Maybe that's a good thing, maybe it's a bad thing. But that's the way _he _wants to do things, and it works for them.

Or at least it usually does.

"He's old enough to think for himself. Church should be something he _wants _to do, not something he _has _to do." Sam's serious, and he's not backing down. It's always been very important to him that his children know about Christianity and God and Jesus and all that, but he absolutely wants them to make their own informed decisions as to what to believe. Jake's not a baby. He's almost a teenager, and he's smart. If church is not where he wants to be then he shouldn't have to be there.

"He is _lazy."_

"Fine," Sam shakes his head. "If you're so against freedom of choice, you can go get him up and tell him he has to go."

"Oh, no," she narrows her eyes at him. "You're not making me into the bad cop after you already told him he can sleep all morning and ride the Amtrak straight to hell."

Sam honestly rolls his eyes at that because… "Okay. I told him he needs to get up and that he can't sleep all day. And how many years did _you _spend not going to church at all?" Because seriously. She dropped church altogether during college and didn't start going again until she started dating him, so it's pretty ironic of her to be sentencing Jake to hell for one skipped Sunday.

"That was different," and she's just as defensive as he expects her to be. "I was an adult. Jake is a child. Big difference. If we want him to do something, we basically just have to tell him to do it. And he has to obey."

Sometimes Sam's amazed by how very much Quinn acts like his own parents, and if he didn't know better, he'd swear that they raised her. Both he and Quinn were raised in fairly-conservative Christian homes, but while his parents were very hands on (as in, hands on your butt if you were disrespectful or didn't do as you were told…), Quinn basically did whatever she wanted, got whatever she wanted, and didn't have any rules except act like a lady and don't be an embarrassment. So it's kind of funny how easy it is for her to fall into the no-nonsense disciplinarian role. The odd thing, though, is that while she plays that role basically nonstop with the babies, she's generally very laid back and usually even _defensive _when it comes to Jake. It's not really unusual at all for her to tell Sam he's being too hard or too harsh and to rush to Jake's defense or even make excuses for him.

Apparently she draws the line at letting him actually grow up a little, though.

…

Sam was right to assume that his parents would have something to say about Jake not coming to church.

His mom tells him that it's a shame he doesn't care enough to make sure his son has a good Christian upbringing, which annoys him to the point of having to literally bite his tongue because she knows that's an exaggeration and knows that his kids have all been raised in church. It's also a little bit ironic given the fact that two of her own children have decided to drop church in its entirety despite their "good Christian upbringing." His dad, of course, tells him that he lets his kids do whatever they want and run wild and that's why they're out of control. That actually pisses him off and obviously pisses his mom off, too, because she jumps to the kids' defense and says that they're _not _out of control and that they're all great kids. She doesn't necessarily defend _Sam, _but at least it's something. Sam's still angry, though, because he thinks it's pretty crappy that his dad's insulting his parenting skills just because he doesn't crack down on every single thing that his kids do and act like they are committing some kind of grievous sins. Yeah, his kids aren't perfect, and sometimes they drive him crazy and go out of their way to get into stuff they know they shouldn't be in. But they're kids. And maybe he's partial, but he kind of thinks they're pretty awesome. And it's not like he never disciplines them. They have rules, and those rules have consequences, and his kids get in trouble plenty. Sam literally cannot tell you a day in the past two years where there wasn't at least one person in time out or grounded- and it's really not that uncommon for all _three _to land in trouble. So no, it's not like his kids just run around doing anything and everything that they want, but he also doesn't treat them like they're new recruits to boot camp, either.

The bad part about this, though, is that Quinn doesn't even jump in to defend him. Hell, it'd be defending herself, too, because he's basically insulting both their skills as parents. He's also insulting their kids in a roundabout way, so it'd be nice if she told him to go to hell or at least told him what he can do with his opinions. But she doesn't. Nope. Apparently her pregnancy hormones are making her extra crazy or something because she basically _agrees _with his dad.

"I told him that Jake's just lazy, and this is just encouraging it."

Quinn's on this kick where she's just like… _mean _lately. He wants to give her the benefit of the doubt and just assume it's all the extra hormones or something, but she never acted like this before. Maybe it's different because it's a girl, or she yelled at him the other day about the temperature outside, so maybe that's it. Like he can control the temperature… He knows it's hot as hell outside, and she can't be all that comfortable, but it's not like he can help how hot it is. Seriously, if he had known it was going to be this bad, he would have thought twice before knocking her up again.

His daughter better be crazy awesome to be causing all this.

He doesn't like the way everyone is ganging up on him, and he kind of wants to put his kids in the car and leave his pregnant wife and the people who birthed and raised him, since they all clearly think he's a shitty, irresponsible parent. He wants to just take his kids to Chuck E Cheese or something because they love that, and obviously he'd rather his kids do stuff they enjoy instead of stuff they hate. But he doesn't. Mostly just because he doesn't want to give them the satisfaction.

Instead, he kind of goes the passive-aggressive route and says, "Well, if Jake's going to give up church, he might as well just start now instead of waiting til he's in college like Stevie and Stacy."

He totally ignores the looks he gets from his parents. He'd take the time to think up something equally as rude to say to Quinn, but he has to live with her, and she can make his life a lot more miserable than his parents really can. So he just keeps it to himself.

Whatever, at least they all shut up about it.

…

He hasn't really talked to his brother since the whole blow up about the money, but he texts him and asks if he's coming to Ethan's birthday party anyway. He's surprised when he actually gets an answer and even more surprised when the answer is yes. But maybe he shouldn't be because no matter what might be going on between them, Stevie's still a good uncle- he still really loves the kids, so it's not shocking that he'll be grown up enough to put the other crap aside for the kids.

The birthday party is an entirely different headache, though, and Sam seriously feels like he might literally fall over from exhaustion with everything that's going on. He's working a ton lately, which isn't surprising because the gym is always busiest in the summer. They're still trying to get the nursery ready, and Quinn's basically turned into a drill sergeant about the whole thing. The kids seem even crazier and more hyper than ever, and seriously. It's just all really exhausting.

But Ethan's turning four, and that's a really big deal because, well, he's four. And when you're four, birthdays are just about the hugest deal in the world. They normally have his party at the park because he's the only one of their kids who actually has a birthday where park-like weather is possible. The other two are both in December, so they can't exactly have outdoor birthday parties unless everyone wants to freeze. But Ethan says he wants to have his party "with the sprinklers," which basically means he wants to turn the sprinklers on and fill up the kiddie pool and just hang out in the backyard. Whatever, Sam thinks it sounds like a pretty awesome idea. Quinn, of course, thinks it sounds terrible and acts like nobody has ever been to their house before with all the crap she suddenly says needs to be done.

And seriously? Nobody cares if the cabinet in the guest bathroom is missing one of its freaking knobs. She is seriously psychotic.

Whatever, though. He has to fix it because she basically threatens to divorce him if he doesn't. He also has to fix the blinds in the little kids' room, figure out what's making the fridge buzz so loudly when the door's open, get a new screen for one of the kitchen windows, clean out the garage, trim the bushes, and fix a loose board in the fence. So yeah, he's pretty freaking tired, but Quinn also seems to think that the whole house needs to be cleaned top to bottom, and he'd pretty much be a dick if he let her do all that by herself. Luckily, Jake's been in a pretty helpful mood lately, so he actually does some stuff without being asked, which is a nice development. And somehow, they get all the house stuff taken care of.

That's only part of it, though. The other part is the actual party, which is already turning out to be a huge pain in the butt. Ethan's flavor of the month is dinosaurs, so that's what he says when they ask him what kind of party he wants. Quinn's immediately got a million ideas, and Sam has no idea how they're going to accomplish all that, but he just lets her do her thing. She works with a woman who makes cakes on the side, so she tells him all about this awesome dinosaur cake that she ordered, and then she starts making up a themed menu that actually sounds kind of awesome. She's got tons of ideas for games and activities, too, and she even tells him to get new sand for the sandbox because she wants to set up a kiddie archaeological dig.

This party's probably going to be pretty awesome, but damn, it's freaking tiring.

…

The thing is, he doesn't hate his job.

No, it doesn't pay a ton, and it's not exactly what he dreamed about when he was a little kid, but he doesn't hate it. He's been doing it for years, and the money's not great, but it's not terrible. He's got a lot of regular clients, and there are always walk-ins to pick up if he's got downtime or just wants extra cash. He likes most everybody he works with, and he's been at the gym for a long time, so he's made plenty of friends through it. Plus, he just really likes the fact that he honestly gets to _help _people.

But just like any other job, there are plenty of days when he dreads waking up and hates walking into work.

It's kind of been a shitty day all around. The kids were cranky in the morning, Quinn threw up her breakfast even though she should be well past the morning sickness part, there was a ton of traffic, and he left his ID badge at home and had to go through the BS of getting a temporary one from the front desk. So, yeah, it was all kind of crappy before he even did anything work-related. It only got worse during the day because he had some asshole walk-in first thing, and then one of his newer clients pulled her shoulder out of socket on the weight machine.

So it's not surprising that by the end of the day, he's basically just ready to give up.

The only thing to look forward to is the fact that it's Thursday, which means Quinn will be showing up soon. She's getting to the point where most of the machines are too dangerous for her, but she's still intent on exercising, so they mostly just do a few miles around the indoor track. He'd be lying, though, if he said it wasn't his favorite time of the week. It's probably dumb or whatever, but sometimes it's literally the only time they get to have actual conversations or just be alone together. And things have been pretty hectic and crazy lately, so they both need a little time alone, away from the kids and everything else.

He's hanging out at the desk talking to a couple of the girls up there- literally talking about the weather and how damn _h_ot it is. It must look like he's flirting or something, though, or maybe like they're flirting with him… because when Quinn walks in the door, she leans against the counter patiently until he walks around to join her, and then she puts both arms around his neck and kisses him. It's weird because she's not exactly into PDA and even weirder because he's sweaty and probably stinks. But whatever, he just lets her because he knows if he stops her, she'll just use that as ammunition against him or something.

She tells him exactly what's up when they're headed back toward the track, and it's just as fake nice as he expects. "I'm glad you have such nice young women to entertain you at work."

He wants to roll his eyes, but he doesn't because he knows she doesn't honestly believe that. She might be a little more self-conscious than usual, but even at their lowest points, they really trust each other. Or at least he trusts her. He assumes she feels the same way because if she thinks he'd ever even _think _about it, she's actually crazy. But he's sure that she knows that. She knows him better than anyone, and she knows that that's not who he is. So he just ignores it and grabs her hand and changes the subject instead.

"I went shopping during my break, and guess what I got Ethan."

"What?" She looks at him out of the corner of her eye like she's half-expecting him to say he bought their preschooler a pet cobra or something.

"A guitar!" Yeah, maybe he's a little bit too excited about it, but it's awesome, okay? It's perfect kid-sized and so cute, and Ethan's going to love it. Quinn, though, seems a little less enthused.

"Sam, you realize that by buying him a guitar, that means we're going to have to _listen _to a guitar, right?"

He shrugs. "I'm gonna teach him how to play. He's gonna be like a child prodigy or something."

She laughs just a little and rolls her eyes. "Did you consider yourself a child prodigy as well?"

"I didn't have the chance to be a prodigy because nobody bought me a guitar until I was twelve. And then I had to teach myself."

"Poor baby."

"Yeah, if only I'd had people to nurture my talent at a young age. Good thing Ethan does."

Quinn half smacks him and shakes her head. "When nobody in our house sleeps for the next two years, you just remember that you encouraged this, okay?"

He'll take the risk.

…

Ethan's party actually comes together pretty nicely.

Somehow, they get everything ready on time, and the backyard transforms into a prehistoric theme pretty flawlessly. Quinn's actually really good at that kind of stuff, and even though she seems stressed beyond belief, she manages to make it look almost easy. The food, the decorations, everything turns out great. And it's definitely worth all the trouble and sweat that goes into it when Ethan walks into the backyard for the first time and sees everything. He gets so excited that he actually jumps up and down a little bit and runs around looking at everything like it's the most amazing thing he's ever seen.

There's a pretty good turnout, which Sam takes as a positive because they have enough food to feed an entire army and nowhere to put the leftovers. He's got some friends from work who come and bring their kids, and Quinn has a few from the museum who show up with their kids, too. Then there are tons of church people and a few people that his parents know. And obviously their whole family is there.

It's awkward, though, almost right from the start. Stacy and Stevie drive together, and Sam's a little relieved when they show up about half an hour late because it means he doesn't really have to entertain them. He says hi obviously, but he has plenty of other stuff to keep him busy and give him an excuse to bail without having to get into any awkward conversations. But it's still weird. Ethan runs up right away and tries to tackle them both, and Sam uses that as an excuse to duck out and go check on the hot dogs.

He talks to several of their guests, trying his best to be a good host for the adults while the kids run all over the backyard and get into everything. Ethan apparently succeeds in kidnapping Stacy because she's on the trampoline turning backflips while several kids bounce around her. It actually looks kind of dangerous, and Sam just hopes that the net does its job if it needs to. Stevie, though, is just hanging out close to the house, really just talking to Jake who seems thoroughly annoyed that he's being forced to attend a four year old's birthday party, even if that four year old is his little brother.

Sam gets distracted again, making sure the food doesn't burn and that the stuff on the table isn't destroyed. He's a little afraid his neighbors might start getting pissed about the noise or something because it's getting _loud, _but hopefully they'll be cool and just realize it's a one-time thing and not make a big deal out of it. It even half-crosses his mind to run over and invite the people next door, but he doesn't actually make it that far because Hunter comes up to him in tears saying something pretty incomprehensible, and it's not until Sam looks down that he sees the blood running down Hunter's leg and the open scrapes all over his knee. Out of all the kids at this party, it _would _be his that ends up getting hurt. Luckily, Judy and Roger are standing kind of close by, so he manages to get their attention so they (well, Roger) can watch the grill while he takes Hunter inside to get cleaned up.

He tries asking what happened, but Hunter's just crying and ignoring him. Sam's not really surprised. Cuts and bruises and skinned knees are nothing new in their house, so he's not exactly freaking out over the fact that his son is bleeding, but he is kind of stressed out about the whole day in general, so it's not like the best timing in the world. But he has to deal with it. He takes Hunter to the bathroom and pulls down the toilet lid so that he can sit him down. Hunter is being just a little too dramatic, but he's two, so Sam gives him a pass and doesn't call him out on it while he gets out the Neosporin and the Band-Aids.

He starts cleaning Hunter's knee and tries to talk over the resulting screams that come the second the washcloth hits his skin. "You have to calm down and get cleaned up if you want to play in the water." It's a half-bribe/half-threat, but it somehow cuts the screams back to little whimpers almost instantly.

"What'd he do?"

Sam looks up at the door because he's surprised to hear someone else's voice. Stevie (_Steven, _he tells everyone all the time, but yeah, good luck with that…) is leaning against the doorframe. He's got a beer in his hand and holds another one out for Sam. He takes it and is actually kind of thankful because a drink might be exactly what he needs to make it through the rest of this day.

Sam shrugs and looks back at Hunter. "What'd you do?"

Hunter's doing those crying hiccup things but manages to say, "Fell down," which is basically as much explanation as they're going to get. It's good enough for Sam, and he goes back to cleaning everything up while Stevie moves further into the bathroom and pushes himself up to sit on the counter. Neither one of them says anything else while Sam finishes with Hunter. He gets it cleaned up and gets a Band-Aid on it, but then Hunter wants to be babied a little bit, so he hugs him and pats the top of his head while he tells him he's okay. Obviously Hunter needs a little bit longer, though, because he doesn't make any move to break from the clinginess.

"Is Quinn still pissed at me?" Stevie asks it out of nowhere, and Sam just looks at him because what is he supposed to say?

"I don't know. Ask her." To be honest, he has no desire whatsoever to get into the middle of whatever conflict is going on between his wife and his brother. He's also still kind of mad at Stevie himself, so it's probably best if he just stay as neutral as possible. For all their sakes.

"Are _you _pissed at me?"

Sam looks at him, finally ducking away from Hunter long enough to stand up. He tells himself to just be calm and rational because there's no point getting worked up or starting a fight at his son's birthday party. Still, he's got a few things to say.

"I don't appreciate the stuff you said the last time I talked to you, no. So yeah, I guess I'm still kind of pissed."

"Look," Stevie sounds really serious. "I'm sorry, okay? I know I shouldn't have said all that stuff, but I was just freaking out. But I'm sorry, okay? For real."

Sam believes him, but it's still pretty weird and messed up that they even have to have this conversation. He stands back up and sets his drink on the counter because Hunter wants to be picked up. He swears his kids are getting bigger every single day, and it's a little depressing that even his baby is starting to feel more like a dead weight sack of potatoes than anything else.

"I just can't believe it would even cross your mind to say those kinds of things. Like about anyone, much less your own family." He shrugs, "It's just surprising." He knows his tone is a little too judgmental, but he kind of thinks his brother deserves to feel bad or guilty for the way he acted. It was pretty freaking terrible.

Stevie looks half-ashamed of himself, which isn't surprising because Sam knows he's always been able to guilt trip both of his siblings when need be. "I didn't mean any of it. I was just stressed out, you know? Like… I didn't know what to do, so I just said a bunch of dumb shi- stuff." He catches himself just in time and looks at Hunter who's still looking kind of pitiful post knee cleanup.

Sam hands him to Stevie so that he can put away the first aid stuff and wash his hands and everything. "It's okay," and he's being serious- life's too short to hold stupid grudges, and family is family no matter what. "But you just need to start thinking before you say stuff you're gonna regret later."

"I know." He readjusts Hunter, who's now looking over his shoulder at his own reflection in the mirror. "I need to start thinking before I do a lot of stuff… It's just hard, you know? Like I didn't mean for this to happen."

Sam nods and puts the last of the stuff back in the medicine cabinet. "Did you get it worked out?"

"I had to borrow it… I've still gotta pay it back somehow. But yeah."

"How are you going to do that?"

Stevie shrugs. "I don't know, I have to figure something out. I need a roommate or something."

"Can you get one?"

"I don't know. I just want to live with Stace, but she said she's moving in with Tyler, so I don't know."

Sam rolls his eyes- he was hoping that idea was long-over by now. "Well, I'm sure Dad would much rather her live with you than with him…"

He just shrugs, and Hunter starts squirming a little bit to be put down. Apparently he's had his fill of being babied and now just wants to go play with the zillion kids in the backyard. He disappears and makes a run for it almost the same second his feet actually hit the ground, and Sam grabs his drink and tells his brother to come help him make another ice bucket in the kitchen. When they pass the backdoor, he can see that things are getting super crazy in the backyard and knows Quinn's probably looking for him to kill him. He can actually see her messing with something at the gift table, and Jake's right there tailing her and asking her a million questions that she's hardly even paying attention to. Sam can't tell if Jake's just complaining or if he's actually got real concerns, but he's probably just asking what they're going to do about the ball game later even though Sam already told him that they would make it even if they have to leave the party a little early.

The kitchen is empty, and Sam grabs a couple of giant mixing bowls and starts filling one up with ice while Stevie just kind of leans over the table and watches. It's so much quieter in the house that it's really tempting to just find a place and hide out for the rest of the afternoon… But obviously he's not going to do that.

After a couple of seconds, Stevie finally just lets out this sigh. "It just sucks because I don't feel like I have _anything, _you know? I can't even pay all my bills. I just feel like a fuck up all the time."

"You're twenty-four, you're not supposed to have it totally together yet."

"You did."

Sam rolls his eyes and starts filling up a second bowl. "Yeah, right. The only reason I even had it _partially _together was because I had a freaking kindergartner to take care of. And trust me, I was skipping bills all the time just to make sure he had something to eat at night. It'll all come together, you just have to give it time."

"What if I don't' find a better job?"

"Are you looking?"

"Not really…"

Sam raises his eyebrows because… "Well, there's your answer." Stevie kind of smiles a little, probably because he realizes how dumb that sounded. "You should be keeping an eye out if you're looking for something different."

"It took me forever to find _this _job."

"Well, you've got a little experience now, so maybe it'll be easier now. Can't hurt to look."

"It just sucks."

"Well, life sucks sometimes." He shrugs because it's just the truth. "And look, you know I'm always here for you, right? And I'm sorry I can't help right now, but I just don't have it."

Stevie shakes his head and finishes the rest of his beer. "It's cool. I'm sorry I tried to pull you into it."

"If you need help, you can always come to me. You know that. I'll do whatever I can, or if you just want to talk, you know I'll listen."

Maybe it's cheesy, but Sam doesn't really give a crap. He takes his younger siblings very seriously, and yeah, a lot of that probably comes from the fact that he spent so much of his life taking care of them and sometimes even having to provide for them. They're like his kids who aren't actually kids, but whatever. Family's the most important thing in the world, and he's always going to do whatever he can to take care of his.

Stevie seems a little embarrassed, which isn't surprising, but he just nods and grabs one of the ice bowls. Sam's not shocked when he changes the subject. "I got E a remote control car that you run into stuff, and then it like flips over and goes the other direction."

"Just what we need, more stuff to crash into shit."

"Yeah. You're welcome."

Sam laughs and shoves his brother out the door.

And then he almost gets tackled the second he sets the ice down on the table. Ethan's hopped up on sugar and like literally bouncing. "Daddy, this is so fun!"

"So fun?"

Ethan nods, clearly super excited. "So, so fun!" He throws his arms around Sam's legs and squeezes, which just makes Sam laugh and pick him.

"I'm glad you're having fun." He loves the way Ethan immediately hugs and squeezes his neck down instead of his knees. "You're getting old."

"This old." Ethan holds up four fingers, and Sam nods.

"I know. It's sad."

"No, it's so fun!"

Sam laughs again, and Ethan starts giggling in a way that clearly indicates sugar overload. He's going to crash so hard later, but at least he's having fun right now.

So it's definitely worth it.

…

A/N: Thanks for the reviews on the last chapter! Expect some fluff in the next part…


	12. Chapter 12

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 12**

…

Nobody ever said it was going to be easy.

Sam feels just about ready to give up one Saturday when he comes home from work mid-morning and finds his whole house in an uproar. The kitchen looks like a bomb exploded or something, so it's pretty obvious that nobody's gotten around to cleaning up the mess from breakfast or the mess that apparently accompanied lunch as well. This isn't too out of the ordinary considering the fact that there are more nights than not when most of the dishes and cleaning gets put on hold until after bedtime. It's just hard to keep up with everything.

Hunter's in the hallway with a long line of magnetic trains that are probably doing wonderful things for the hardwood… Ethan's watching him and trying to eat a half-melted popsicle that is literally getting on the walls. Sam grabs it from him and ignores the immediate protests, but seriously? He's almost one-hundred percent positive that the popsicle came with ignored instructions to stay at the kitchen table anyway. He throws it in the trash and hands him a banana instead, cracking the peel open for him.

"Jake's in trouble!" Ethan's got a mouthful of banana, but his eyes are wide and serious.

"Why?"

Ethan just shrugs. "Momma's mad."

It appears that Ethan's right, though. Sam knows there's something really going on because he can _hear _it, and when he makes it to the living room, he's not even sure what he just walked into. Quinn is _screaming _at Jake, and the fact that he can't actually hear her isn't deterring her in the slightest. She'll pissed off and yelling in a very real kind of way, and Jake's just standing there looking equally as pissed off with the most hateful kind of glare on his face. It's not the normal preteen battle of wills or whatever- something is seriously wrong, and Sam has no clue what.

"What the hell is wrong?"

Jake doesn't hear him obviously, and Quinn barely acknowledges him at first. In fact, she nearly does a double take and then final notices him. "I'm not dealing with this," she says seriously.

"Dealing with what? What happened?" He looks over at Jake who is now kind of glaring at him, too, and he has no idea what is even happening.

He gets an answer, though, and that answer is Jake telling him that Quinn is mean.

All that gets in response is an eye roll, and then Quinn turns back around to Sam and just starts going off. She's saying stuff like _disrespectful, rude, _and _doesn't listen, _but Sam barely even hears her because he's watching Jake who is visibly getting more and more irritated by the second. Sam knows exactly why, too, considering the fact that Quinn has her entire back turned to him and is speaking directly to Sam. Sam's just about to point this out, but he doesn't get the chance because Jake comes flying across the room, gets right between them, literally stomps his foot and tells Quinn that if she's going to talk about him, she should at least do it in front of his face.

Quinn looks shocked for a second, but Jake just looks pissed. Sam decides it's best to try and diffuse the situation as quickly as possible, so he pulls Jake's arm a little and tells him he needs to go to his room. Jake just kind of gapes at him and then yanks his arm away and protests that he didn't even do anything. Sam tells him to just go, and Jake gives them both the best go to hell look he's got before stomping all the way down the hallway and slamming his bedroom door so hard that Hunter's baby picture actually falls off the wall.

The shattered glass all over the floor is apparently the last straw for Quinn because she starts going off almost immediately. "I'm sick of his attitude! He thinks he can get away with anything, and I'm tired of it!"

Sam still has no idea what's even going on. "What happened? What did he do?"

"He's so disrespectful!"

"What did he _do?"_

Quinn gives him a pretty hateful look, but then she finally tells the story. "Have you seen his room? It's a disaster area. So I told him to clean it up, and he told me he was busy. And I told him to stop whatever he was doing and clean it."

"All of this about a clean room?" Sam just raises his eyebrows because that's a little extreme…

Quinn, though, narrows her eyes at him. "If you'd let me finish…" So he shuts up and lets her go on. "I gave him an hour, and then I went back and he was just sitting there playing video games, so obviously I unplugged it, and he got mad about that. And then I told him it was his last chance, and he told me he doesn't have to do anything I say. So fine, I told him he wasn't going to the game today, and he flipped out. And I'm sick of it."

At least her voice has calmed down a little bit, but Quinn still seems beyond angry, and to be honest, Sam can't really blame her. He also can't believe Jake said that, and he's more than a little pissed himself. But still. "You grounded him from the game?"

Quinn just kind of gapes at him, but then she inhales slowly and says, "Yes, Sam, I did. And it'd be really nice if you actually followed through with it because I don't know what the hell else to do!"

He nods because he knows she's right… But at the same time, all he can think about is the fact that his team is on a three game losing streak and that there's no way they're going to break that when their star player isn't allowed to play. But Quinn's right, and Jake was way out of line. And if they have to ground him from the one thing he actually seems to care about, maybe he'll get his attitude in check.

"I'll talk to him. Just calm down, okay?" He pushes some hair behind her ear because it's falling in her face. She doesn't need to be stressing herself out, especially right now. Quinn takes in another breath and then nods.

Sam's tired and doesn't really want to deal with this, but being tired doesn't really mean much when you have kids who need something, good or bad, so he hurries and picks up the glass from the picture frame and then goes to Jake's room. He doesn't bother knocking because there is literally no point, and even if there _were, _he's not really sure Jake deserves that courtesy right now.

He's sure that he doesn't when Jake looks up from his place on the bed and tells him to get out of his room.

"Well, this is actually _my _room because I own this house, so I can be in here if I want."

Jake ignores him, just levels him with the same go to hell look from earlier, and Sam really has to work at keeping his temper under control because bratty teenagers aren't exactly his favorite thing at the moment. "You're not going to the game. And you're not going to disrespect Quinn like that ever again. Got it?"

Jake stares at him for like ten seconds, and then he responds with a sign Sam's never seen him make before but that comes through loud and clear.

Sam shakes his head, literally at a loss for words, and then he leaves. Because he's pretty sure that his initial reaction to his twelve year saying, "Fuck you," could possibly get him arrested for child abuse and/or murder. So he leaves. Because that's just about the only safe response he has at the moment.

He's mad. Like _really _mad. He's not sure he's _ever_ been that angry with any of his kids, and he literally has to walk away from the situation because if he doesn't, things are going to go from bad to worse, and that's probably not the best thing right now. He wants to go tell Quinn because maybe she will calm him down or something, but when he gets back to the living room, he's pretty sure she's not really in the position to do much calming.

She's on the couch crying, and he can hear one of the little kids crying from the kitchen, too. He's pretty sure it's Hunter, but he doesn't go investigate because he honestly can't take it anymore. This is not what he wanted to come to, and part of him just wants to get in his car and go back to work. Because really? What the hell?

"Are you okay?" He sits down beside her, waiting for her to issue some kind of response, but all she does is cry some more. "I told Jake he's not going."

Quinn gives no indication that she hears him at all.

"Seriously, don't let him upset you like that. He's just being a little asshole today, it's not worth it."

She finally says something, but it's not exactly an answer to his question. It's more something that he hopes is hypothetical because she says, "Are we fucking _stupid?" _and looks at him with these crazy eyes, and he once again has no clue what's going on.

"What are you talking about?"

"Why the hell are we having another child? We can't even handle the ones we've already got!"

"Look, I told Jake he can't act like that. I'm going to handle it."

"It's not Jake!" He stares at her, and she shakes her head. "It's not just Jake. It's Jake, it's Hunter, it's Ethan… I don't even know who's in there crying!"

"Do you want me to go see?"

And Quinn rolls her eyes because apparently that's not the point she was trying to make. "We don't need another baby!"

He looks at her now very pregnant stomach. "It's kind of too late for that now…"

But she looks miserable and not even close to a being in a joking around kind of mood. "What are we going to do, Sam? We can't handle another one. Sometimes…" She frowns, and her voice drops. "Sometimes I don't even like our kids!"

He stares at her because… "Uhh…"

"I know I'm not supposed to say that," and she sounds seriously desperate. "I love them more than anything, but I swear sometimes I just want to run away and disappear."

He doesn't really know what to say to that because sometimes he'd like to disappear, too, but he's never come out and said he doesn't like his own kids… But that doesn't necessarily mean he's never _thought _it.

"Just calm down, okay?" And he tries to be as gentle as possible. He puts an arm around her shoulder and plays with the end of her hair. "You just need to take a break."

He likes the way she just kind of sinks into him because it makes him feel needed and like he's able to protect her. He likes that. They just sit like that for a little while, and he can tell when her breathing evens out some that she's finally stopped crying. He doesn't hear anyone crying from the kitchen anymore, either, so he assumes whatever conflict was happening has been worked out. So it's just quiet for a little while until Quinn asks, "What did Jake say?"

"Fuck you."

She lifts her head and looks at him. "Excuse me?"

"He literally said _fuck you." _

Quinn's eyes are a little big, and she looks like she can't believe it. She shakes her head slowly. "What is wrong with him?"

Sam just shrugs and lets his own head fall back against the couch. "I don't know."

"What did you say?"

"I didn't say anything. I just left because I want to beat him."

She lets out a little laugh even though they both know he's actually serious. "This needs to be over."

He assumes she's talking about puberty and all the drama and bad attitudes that come with it. "I'm pretty sure this is just the beginning… And then we'll get a few years break and then get to do it all over again."

"Times three."

"Times three." He doesn't even want to _think _about that.

"You should just call your parents and let them deal with it."

Sam shakes his head but smiles a little bit anyway. "He might not make it out alive. I said shit in front of my mom one time, and she for real washed my mouth out with soap. And I was like fourteen. You know my parents are old school."

Quinn laughs- clearly she's never had a mouthful of Dial. "No, you know what would happen? Your mom wouldn't even believe it, and she'd tell you that you were mistaken. And that the signs for fuck you and love you are really similar or something."

Sam rolls his eyes. Because unfortunately, she is completely right.

…

It takes him literally two full hours before he actually thinks he's calmed down enough to talk to Jake.

He honestly expects him to be playing a game or sleeping or something else. But when he goes to his room, Jake's just sitting on his bed with his back against the wall staring at the floor. Sam has no idea if he's been sitting there for two hours, but he really doesn't look like he's moved much. He looks calmed down, not in the same angry blind rage from before- now he just looks tired or nervous or something. He doesn't look up when Sam comes in but finally acknowledges him when he sits down.

"Are you calmed down now?"

Jake gives a really small nod but doesn't say anything else.

"You want to tell me what's going on?"

Jake looks at him. For a second, he thinks he might even get an answer. But then he doesn't because Jake's eyes start watering, and he's crying ten seconds later. To say it's surprising would be an understatement because Jake's not a crier. When he _does _cry, it's very, very rare. Sam's not even sure _why _he's crying now unless he's scared of how much trouble he's potentially in. But seriously, he stopped crying over being in trouble when he was like eight. Sam feels sorry for him, but he also knows better than to let his sympathies take over.

"You know you're in trouble, right?" It's a rhetorical question, but Jake nods anyway. "Do you know _why?" _Another nod, and now Jake's got the heels of his hands under his eyes trying to hide the fact that he apparently can't stop crying. "Quinn asked you to clean this room up hours ago, and it's still a mess."

Jake looks around and then lets his eyes dart to the top of his bedspread like he's embarrassed or something. He wipes at his eyes again, and Sam still doesn't know what the tears are about. The out of whack hormones currently invading his household are going to kill him, he's sure. Between puberty and pregnancy, he's not really sure how much more he can take.

Jake says something, and Sam doesn't understand it. He lets him know, and Jake tries again, but it doesn't make sense. Sam just doesn't know what he's saying. Jake gets visibly frustrated and then just shakes his head like he's done trying.

It's hard because Sam feels bad for Jake. It's hard to watch your kid cry, no matter what, and it's even harder when you don't even know what's going on. But tears or not, there's still a very real issue at hand and also the fact that Jake put himself in this situation. There are serious issues they need to deal with.

"You were really rude to Quinn. You don't talk to her that way. And when she tells you to do something, you do it."

It's hard sometimes, making sure that Jake gets what he's saying. It's easier now than it used to be, but when Jake was smaller, it was hard to tell if ever understood anything. If he did something wrong, there was always a little hesitation on enforcing consequences just because it was almost impossible to tell if he even comprehended that he was doing something wrong.

But things are different now, and Jake knows what's right and knows what's wrong. He knows better than to be disrespectful or say he doesn't have to do what he's told. He's acting out and deliberately disobeying, and that's why he's in trouble.

Jake, for what it's worth, looks like he's really sorry. He looks like he feels guilty, and Sam has no doubt that he probably does feel bad. He loves Quinn, and he probably knows that he hurt her feelings and regrets it. He dodges that subject, though, and instead asks if he can go to the ballgame if he cleans his room. Sam tells him no, and he gets an immediate protest and a demand to know _why._

"Because you're being punished. You were seriously out of line."

Jake protests again, saying how it's not fair, but Sam just holds his ground.

"It's not fair when you act like that. You know better."

Jake is frustrated, clearly. He's still got tears in his eyes even though he's managed to make them stop falling. But he's upset, and in all honesty, Sam feels bad for him. Maybe he shouldn't, but he does have some kind of recollection about how much being a kid sucks sometimes. But still, he's not going to just let him get away with it, either, because there's no excuse for that kind of stuff.

Jake finally says he's sorry, but Sam just shrugs because yeah, he probably _is _sorry, but it's a little too late. When he doesn't relent, though, Jake just gets upset all over again and starts signing something really fast that Sam can't keep up with. The only thing he really even gets is that Jake wants to talk to Miles, so he kind of gets the gist.

It sucks, okay? Not just because Jake actually loves baseball and because he's really, really good at it… But also because it's basically the only real socialization he has during the summer. Jake can lip read. He can follow most conversations, but it's not like he can carry on a conversation with the average hearing person. Yeah, he's lucky that his family's pretty proficient at signing because a lot of kids don't even have that, but that's pretty much all he has. When he was little, there were a few kids in their old neighborhood that he was friends with and could play with and get along okay, but he doesn't have that anymore. He literally doesn't know any of the kids in this neighborhood, and he's never going to because he pretty much avoids new people at all costs.

It's not that he's anti-social, at least not intentionally. He's popular at his school and is friends with just about everyone in that tight-knit environment. But outside of that? Outside of that, he's basically just a deaf kid who can't communicate with 99 percent of the population. He doesn't talk at all, not even at home. He used to try when he was younger, but he doesn't anymore- he literally goes out of his way to keep himself totally silent.

Because he's embarrassed.

Jake's not stupid or naïve. He is perfectly aware of the things that make him different from everyone else, and he, just like most kids, sees being different as just about the worst thing in the world. He knows that his deafness is something that everybody notices and, he assumes, judges him for. A few years ago, some kids at church made fun of him when he tried to talk in a Sunday School discussion, and that was basically all the confirmation Jake needed to decide that he was weird and abnormal and, in the eyes of a then nine year old, stupid and worthless. He was upset and embarrassed, and he didn't even try speaking after that. He doesn't talk at all now, except for forced speech therapy sessions at school that he hates. He says he doesn't want to speak, he says it makes him look stupid. So he just doesn't.

Because of this, he honestly has no friends outside of school. And when school's out for the summer, he's essentially alone- cut off and isolated from everybody else his age. Except for on Saturdays when there are games. There are two other deaf kids on the team, and they've all grown up together and been friends since they were literally preschoolers. They're really the only friends Jake gets to see in the summer, the only people he can even _talk _to that aren't his parents or grandparents, so yeah, seeing them for a few hours a week is pretty important.

And knowing all that kind of makes it really fucking difficult for Sam to stand his ground.

"Look," he says, holding up his hand to cut Jake off. "You're going to clean this room up. And you're going to do whatever Quinn or I tell you to do without complaining. You're going to drop that attitude and start being respectful. And if you don't get into more trouble, maybe you can play next week."

It's as close to a compromise as he's willing to get. There's a part of him that wants to bench Jake inevitably because he's not behaving like someone who's earned the right to have outside activities and needs a cold, hard lesson. Then there's another part, a selfish part, that will do whatever to keep Jake on the right track because they're never going to win another game without him. And then there's just the part that can see every single emotion in that kid's eyes and knows exactly what he's feeling- that part that hates to see Jake unhappy or hurt or feeling anything less than one-hundred percent loved and happy. And that's the hardest part to deal with.

Jake's upset, like visibly, but he's trying to not show all of it. Sam gets it- it sucks getting in trouble. It's hard, though, as a parent, just holding his ground and following through with stuff. It's a lot harder than he ever would have thought it would be. Because when your kid is upset and you know he really actually feels bad, it's hard to follow through with punishments and that kind of stuff. But that's how you learn, right? Through correction.

God, he hopes so. Because he's got a ton more years of parenting to potentially fuck up, and he'd prefer if he was at least doing something right.

…

He calls his mom while he's on his way home from the ball game and asks if the kids can come over, preferably for the whole night.

He tells her that Quinn's really overwhelmed and that she needs a break, and his mom's surprisingly understanding about it. Maybe she just knows how rough it can get trying to deal with kids, and she probably just sympathizes with how exhausting pregnancy must be or something because she just says yes right away and comes over and picks up all three kids for the rest of the night.

Quinn's actually taking a nap, so she doesn't even realize that the kids are gone until she wakes up and comes into the living room rubbing her eyes and asking why it's so quiet. Sam, who's still dressed from the game (they lost- shocker…) just smiles and tells her that they're kid-free for a whole night.

The look on her face is kind of the best thing ever.

They order pizza because this is a one night mini-vacation, and you don't cook on vacation. You don't do too much of anything, actually, and that's exactly what they do. They watch a movie and don't mention the kids- the existing ones or the baby- even once. They don't talk about work or bills or anything even close to that. It's seriously awesome.

"This is the best night ever." Quinn's all smiles as she sips on a bottle of green tea and leans against him.

"We need a break."

She lets out this little sigh, and he can't see her face, but if he had to bet, he'd guess that her eyes have probably slipped shut. They just sit there for a little while, and she's probably going to sleep or something. But then she says, "What about Riley?" out of nowhere, and he turns his head to look down at her.

"Huh?"

"For the baby. What about Riley?"

They haven't talked about baby names in awhile because every time they did, they always just ended up hitting brick walls. They haven't been able to agree on anything, but he rolls Riley around in his head and kind of likes it. "That's not bad."

"It's cute and kind of country."

"Our kids already sound like rednecks."

"I know. So why break it now? Riley fits right in."

The baby's been moving nonstop ever since dinner- apparently she has strong feelings about pizza- and Sam moves his hand from the top of Quinn's knee to her belly. "Are you a Riley?" He looks down and waits for a response. "Nothing," he says, looking back at Quinn and raising his eyebrows.

"Maybe she can't hear you. You have to get closer."

So he leans over and speaks right into her stomach. "Riley Evans?" She's still not moving, but a few seconds later, she gives a swift kick, and Sam looks back up at Quinn who's got her lips pressed together and a _told you so _kind of look on her face.

"I guess she likes it. That was a pretty big kick."

"My baby girl's gonna be a soccer star."

He kisses her stomach at the exact moment Quinn says, "I think you mean cheerleader, but okay."

And then he just gets this flash and just smiles because he can't help it. Quinn must notice because she gives him a weird look, and he shakes his head and sits up. "I just thought of how cute she's gonna be."

"I know, right?" And she gets this grin on her face like she's been thinking the same thing.

And it's a fact, okay? His kids are cute. All of them. He's not even being biased or anything- he just happens to make really attractive children. It's not being conceited, it's just being not blind.

"Riley Evans," he repeats it slowly.

"Riley Kate Evans."

Quinn looks at him, and he thinks about it. It doesn't sound bad at all actually. It actually sounds kind of perfect.

"Riley Kate Evans."

…

A/N: Quick update! This one's a little shorter, but hopefully not too bad. Thanks for all the reviews on the last chapter!


	13. Chapter 13

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 13**

…

By the end of July, Quinn's temper is at its highest, and her patience is at its lowest.

Sam can't really blame her, considering she is like nine months pregnant in 100 degree heat, but even if he can't blame her, he still does his best to stay out of her way for the most part. He also tries to keep the kids out of her way because she doesn't have much patience for whining or complaining, which is basically the only thing the kids seem to want to do lately. He's not sure what's up with that, but it probably has something to do with all the last minute baby prep that's happening. With all the focus on that, there's not really a lot to pass around to everything and everyone else, and he's pretty sure the kids realize it. Considering Hunter said he wanted the baby to "go away" two nights ago, he'd say he's almost positive they realize it.

It's pretty bad that he's ready for her to go away before she even gets here.

But Sam sees it and at least knows what's going on. He can't really force his kids into excitement at the prospect of a new sibling, but he can at least try a little preemptive striking to kind of soften the blow. Or at least he can bribe them a little bit.

He decides to take each of them out and do something alone with them. That doesn't really happen all that often anyway, so it's kind of a big deal to begin with. Sometimes he gets Jake out by himself, but Ethan and Hunter generally come as a packaged deal, so it'll be cool to get them out by themselves. He actually has to take a couple of days off work to accomplish it, but it's worth it if it gets the kids to stop being so negative all the time and makes them feel special for a few hours.

It's better than nothing.

…

He takes Jake first because that's the easiest.

They go to a Reds game because that's kind of their go-to spot for time alone, and it's something they've been doing since Jake was tiny. They actually haven't made it to a game this season, so he splurges and actually buys decent seats instead of the cheap tickets they normally get. They're field seats, right behind first base- they could definitely be worse, and Jake seems pleased.

Sam's changed his mind about the Reds over the years. He used to just go to the games out of necessity- they were the home team, and it was definitely easiest just to head downtown and pick up some tickets. It wasn't like he had any real connection to the team or even particularly cared if they won or lost. He grew up as a Cardinals fan, and he couldn't really just jump on the Reds bandwagon just because he happened to live in Cincinnati. But over the years, he's come to call himself a real fan. He roots for them now against most everyone (although he still roots for the Cardinals when St. Louis comes to town). But he likes the Reds now, for real, so it's even more fun going to the games.

Jake loves them, though. He's been raised on them, and they're his favorite team despite the fact that they suck more often than not. But he's a real fan and has always loved going to games. Jake just loves baseball in general, which is awesome because having something to focus on will hopefully help keep him out of trouble as he gets older.

The little kids aren't quite as into it, and that's probably Sam's fault. He honestly meant to get Ethan onto a t-ball team this year, but it just didn't happen. They just got really busy, and it kind of slipped through the cracks. Plus, Sam already feels a little guilty knowing he won't be coaching his younger kids the way he's always coached Jake, but with the Little League team, there's not enough time leftover to take on a t-ball team, too, but he'll find them teams next year for sure. He works with them a little- well, as much as he can. Ethan's just now getting to the point where he wants to pay attention, and Hunter is hit or miss as to whether he wants to show any interest on any given day. But they've got a tee set, and he tries to work with them a little bit at a time. Jake, actually, spends more time at it than Sam does, and the boys are honestly more receptive to him anyway. It's nice to look out in the backyard, though, and see Jake out there with his little brothers helping them bat and showing them where to run. Because despite the fact that they all fight like crazy and do everything in their power to annoy each other, Ethan and Hunter both basically think Jake is like the coolest person to ever walk on the planet or something, and they both die for any kind of attention from him. So it's awesome when Jake's actually nice to them because they love it.

But for today, they leave Ethan and Hunter at home and head to a late afternoon game.

The Cubs are in town, so it's actually pretty crowded, but they find their seats easily and get there in plenty of time for the first pitch. It's an okay game that picks up a little in the seventh inning when Cincinnati magically has four back to back homeruns that seem to come out of nowhere. It basically seals the outcome of the game, though, but they stick around til the end to watch them pull out a win anyway.

And when the game's over, Jake actually says he's hungry, which is kind of a feat all its own, considering the fact that he basically has to be forced to eat on a normal basis. So Sam takes him to this place downtown that has awesome turkey burgers and is honestly shocked when Jake wants a burger, fries, _and _a milkshake. It's not exactly healthy, but Sam figures pumping calories into him by any means necessary probably can't be a bad thing.

Jake's had kind of a rough summer- kind of a rough year, actually. It's like he's on a roller coaster, up and down constantly, really good days and then really awful days. Sam's doing his best to be patient, and sometimes it's harder than others, but he's trying. It's just something they've got to get through, and he's doing what he can to make sure things stay under control.

But there are good moments, like right now, when Jake's acting totally normal and rehashing the game they just watched, giggling and smiling and eating a chocolate milkshake with a spoon. And he's in a rare mood where he looks totally comfortable with himself. He's signing and not paying attention to anything around him, not worrying that other people are staring at him and judging him. He's just being himself and happy, and Sam appreciates that because he doesn't see it all the time now.

It bothers him a lot when Jake's self-consciousness gets in the way. Part of it's just normal middle school stuff, but a lot of it is the result of Jake's own insecurities. Stuff he can't help but that he thinks makes him weird or wrong in some way. It's tough watching your kids go through stuff like that, knowing they feel like they're less than other people or that they're being judged all the time. Kids are mean, and it's hard watching that happen and not being able to do anything about it.

But for right now, Jake seems okay, and Sam's willing to take what he can get.

…

He asks Hunter what he wants to do, and the only answer he gets is, "Fishes!" so it's pretty obvious that the aquarium is the way to go.

Sam's pretty sure this is probably the very first time he's ever had Hunter out by himself for anything more than a pediatrician checkup. It's even weird when they're in the car on the way to the aquarium and he only has to turn on one DVD player. Hunter doesn't really seem to notice the total lack of everyone else, and he just sits in the backseat and watches a movie he's literally seen a hundred times like it's something brand new.

But when they get to the aquarium and actually gets inside, he almost instantly perks up and starts having fun. He's been here before, but it was awhile ago, so he probably doesn't really remember it. He's more into it this time, though, pointing at everything and looking around in amazement. He wants to be carried most of the time, but Sam doesn't really care because it's a lot easier to carry one kid when you don't have another one begging to be picked up, too. Plus, he's probably got a much better view from this level than he would if he was walking on his own.

He waves at the aquarium workers who are decked out in scuba gear and feeding the fish from under the water, and he pets a stingray and gets to touch a starfish. It's not until they're actually in the gift shop getting ready to leave that he finally asks where Ethan is. Sam tells him Ethan's at home with Nana and Jake, and Hunter seems to accept that but then picks up a random stuffed flounder and announces it that it's for Ethan. Sam really wasn't planning on spending a lot of money, but it's kind of too sweet to pass up. So he ends up buying the flounder and a stuffed shark that Hunter wants for himself. He tells him to pick something out for Jake, too, and redirects his attention to some kind of game that Jake may very well hate but that he will definitely like better than the stuffed seagull his baby brother initially picked out.

At the last second, Sam grabs a pink angelfish and asks Hunter if he wants to get it for sissy.

He's only a little bit surprised when he gets an emphatic, "No!" in response.

…

Ethan's day turns out to be the best.

Sam's pretty sure most of that has to do with the fact that four years old is pretty much the perfect age. Kids are old enough to do a lot of stuff on their own, but they're not totally independent and pushy yet. They think everything is the coolest thing ever, and they're super easy to entertain.

Plus, they just get really, really excited over everything.

Unlike Hunter, who sat in the backseat and obliviously watched a movie, Ethan is fully aware that he is alone, doesn't want the DVD player on, and spends the whole drive asking over and over if they're really going by themselves. Luckily, the Children's Museum isn't too far away, so Sam doesn't have to deal with that for a long time. They've been here before, but there's always new stuff, and Ethan specifically requested it. He loves it- every kid freaking loves this place. When Jake was little, he used to try (unsuccessfully) to con a trip here at least once a month.

It's awesome, though, and Sam gets to spend the whole day just playing with Ethan, which is something that never happens. Ethan immediately throws himself head first into every exhibit and activity, and he smiles and laughs and talks so much that it's easy to tell how excited and happy he is. He loves everything and spends forever inside the kid-sized grocery store, which has always been his favorite place to hit up.

When they're in the middle of a science exhibit about gravity, Ethan grabs Sam's hand and says, "This is so cool, isn't it?"

Sam doesn't honestly know whether he's talking about the trip in general or whether he's talking specifically about the interactive parachute drop they're currently playing in. But both are pretty cool, so he nods anyway.

Eventually, Ethan needs a break and says he's thirsty, so they go to the little café and order lemonade. There's no place to sit, so they end up just sitting on the floor in the main lounge, and Sam's not really surprised when Ethan crawls into his lap and smiles.

"I love this day," and he's so serious that Sam just has to smile.

"You do?"

And Ethan mirrors the smile and nods. "This is my favorite day ever!"

Sam laughs and uses his free hand to hug Ethan when he finds both arms around his neck and immediate squeezing. "This day is pretty awesome," he agrees. Because it _i_s.

And then Ethan, who's still hugging him, says, "I love you, Daddy," and it's kind of the best feeling in the world. It's not the first time Ethan's ever said it, not by a long shot, but it feels pretty damn great every single time. When you have one kid who you know will never be able to say the words, it kind of makes it easy to not take hearing them for granted.

"I love you, too, buddy." He kisses the side of his head and rubs his back a little.

It sucks because Sam knows they've been busy lately, and maybe they haven't been able to give the kids enough one on one and still get everything done that needs to be finished before the baby.

But he's never, ever going to be too busy to tell his kids that he loves them.

…

He's in the backyard with Jake before dinner one night. They're having a little impromptu pitching practice because despite the fact that Jake's a short stop, every good baseball player needs to know how to pitch a ball.

He's throwing to Sam who is giving him different combinations to throw, and Jake is concentrating and doing a pretty good job of it. They probably need to fit in some batting practice, too, but they also eventually need to stop and eat. It's still really warm outside despite the fact that it's almost seven o'clock, and the mosquitoes are already out, too. But Jake doesn't seem to notice, and Sam's okay with it for now.

He doesn't really pay attention when the backdoor opens, and Ethan comes running out. The little kids have been in and out all night, so it's not surprising or anything. Ethan starts calling for him, but Sam keeps his eyes trained on Jake who's getting ready for an outside curve ball. He stops himself from the pitch, though, when Ethan runs right between them.

"Daddy, Momma said come here."

Sam looks down at him. "Why?"

Ethan doesn't answer that, just says, "She said hurry fast," so Sam looks up and tells Jake to hold on.

Chances are, Quinn's probably found another chip in the bathroom paint or something, and she'll be sending him out to Home Depot to get some sealant. Either that, or she's decided that she just has to have a cherry Icee _right now _and needs him to go get one. But he's a little surprised and a little worried when he gets back inside and finds her sitting on the couch in the living room with one hand on her stomach kind of hunched over.

"What's wrong?" It's the immediate reaction, and he goes right over, totally ignoring Hunter who shows up and announces that he's hungry.

Quinn looks up at him and has a visibly pained look on her face. "I think we need to go to the hospital."

"Are you okay?"

She nods and swallows a little. "I think I'm having contractions."

There are still three and a half weeks til the due date, but clearly their little girl is impatient. Sam does his best not to panic because he knows that's not helpful at all, so he just nods and licks his lips. "Do we have time to get a bag?" They don't have anything ready, which is dumb, but three and a half weeks seems like a long time away. He realizes suddenly that it's not. At all.

"It might just be Braxton Hicks." Quinn's breathing through her mouth. "Let's just go."

"Okay, let me go get the kids."

She nods and doesn't say anything, and he knows she's probably just focusing on breathing or something. He's a little surprised that he doesn't initially feel more panic than he does, but he's done this before. And yeah, it's early, but it's not _too _early- not like Ethan. Ethan was _too _early, almost two months too early, and they spent six long weeks in the NICU waiting for him to gain weight and be well enough to come home. That had been awful, but this isn't the same. Three and a half weeks is okay- they can deal with that. They just have to make it to the hospital.

Sam grabs Hunter who's still whining about being hungry, and then he goes into the backyard to get the other kids. Jake and Ethan are both on the trampoline, and Sam hates the fact that he can't just yell across the yard at them. He goes over and manages to get their attention to tell them that they have to go to the hospital. Ethan doesn't seem overly concerned, but Jake looks worried, and Sam just tells him that it's fine and that Quinn just wants to see the doctor.

When they're both back on the ground, Sam passes Hunter to Jake and asks if he can put the kids in the car. Jake nods and heads around the house to do just that while Sam goes back inside. Quinn's still on the sofa, but she doesn't look in quite as much pain as she did a couple of minutes ago. She asks him where the kids are, and he tells her that Jake's getting them buckled and then asks if she's ready to move. Quinn looks like the thought alone pains her, but she nods after a second anyway and lets him help her up.

Thankfully, he remembers to grab some snacks for the kids, since dinner definitely doesn't seem like it will be happening.

…

It's a mess. The whole thing is a mess.

He tries calling both his mom and his dad and can't get either one of them to answer the phone. He doesn't know where the hell they are, but it'd be really nice if somebody would pick up the damn phone because having the kids in the hospital is just a disaster waiting to happen. For one thing, Ethan and Hunter both start looking really worried every single time Quinn even hints that she's in pain, and they aren't doing too well without dinner, either. Apparently the bag of carrot sticks and fruit snacks that Sam grabbed on the way out of the house aren't doing much to satisfy them because they're both on the verge of meltdowns before they even make it out of the waiting room.

The ER is pretty full, but they don't have to wait too long before a nurse comes and takes them back to a room. Sam considers telling Jake to just stay with the boys in the waiting room, but that's a little too much responsibility, especially when he fully expects at least one huge temper tantrum within the next hour. So all five of them crowd into the examination room, and Sam does his best to keep Hunter from destroying things while the nurse asks Quinn some questions and tries to pretend like she isn't bothered by the fact that a whole family has fit itself into a room clearly meant for a much smaller party.

After all the basic stuff- the blood pressure, the temperature, all that crap- the nurse gives them a quick smile and says that they're pretty busy and that they may be waiting a little while for a doctor but that she'll try to get someone in as soon as possible. It's not at all what Sam wants to hear, and Quinn literally looks like she's about to burst into tears.

"Where are your parents?" she asks the second the door closes behind the nurse.

"I don't know. They still haven't replied." He's been texting and calling nonstop since they got in the car, but nobody is answering.

"Oh, my god, I can't deal with this." She leans her head back against the wall and closes her eyes for a second.

Hunter and Ethan seem to have no concern for the fact that she's clearly in pain and nervous because they're getting whinier by the second. And Sam finally can't take it anymore, either, and snaps at them to be quiet after about the ninetieth complaint about hunger. He feels bad immediately, though, and knows they can't help it if they're hungry.

"Do you think I should go get them something to eat?" He's careful about asking Quinn anything at the moment because she really doesn't seem like she wants to be bothered. But she opens her eyes and nods.

"Please take them with you."

Sam doesn't argue, just tells the kids they're going to eat. He kisses the side of Quinn's head and asks if she's sure she's okay. She is, and she nods. Then Jake asks if he can stay, and Sam just looks at Quinn who nods again. Sam says okay, but he tells Jake that if a doctor or nurse comes in and says he needs to wait outside to just go to the hallway and stand there. He's not really sure Jake needs to witness whatever kind of examination might be taking place shortly, and he's really not in the mood to attempt it and permanently scar him.

Finding the cafeteria turns out to be harder than it looks, and actually getting food and sitting down long enough to eat it is a major accomplishment because the kids have officially spun out of control. They're not quite as whiney with food in front of them, but now it's moved on to the land of a million questions.

"Is the baby coming today?"

"What's wrong with Mommy?"

"When can we go home?"

Question after question after question. And then Sam finally feels his phone buzzing and grabs it out of his pocket to answer his dad's call.

"Where have you been?"

"Hello to you, too."

Sam rolls his eyes because he's so not in the mood for this right now. He doesn't even bother responding to that. "I've been calling y'all for like an hour."

"Yeah, I see that. What's wrong?"

"We're at the hospital. Quinn thinks she's having contractions."

"Already?"

He rolls his eyes again because _yes. _Already. If she wasn't, they wouldn't be at the damn hospital, now would they? "Can you come get the kids?"

"Well, yeah. But are you sure it's labor?"

"I don't know, Dad," and he doesn't bother masking his annoyed tone. "I'm not a damn doctor, am I?"

Ethan's head snaps up, and he immediately says, "Oooh…" like somebody's in big trouble or something.

Sam ignores him and instead focuses on not screaming when his dad says, "Well, I don't know. This is your fourth kid; you'd think you'd be an expert by now. You must only pay attention to the front end of the process."

"Really?"

His dad drops it then and asks what hospital they're at. He says they'll be there in a little while and to call him if anything changes. And at least that part's worked out, but Sam doesn't feel any less stressed while he cleans up the garbage and dinner leftovers and takes them to the trash can.

When they get back to the ER, though, Quinn definitely seems less stressed.

She and Ethan are both sitting on the bed, and they're having some kind of conversation and smiling. They both seem really calm, which is more than can be said for the younger kids. They've been arguing ever since they left the cafeteria, and Sam's almost ready to snap on them.

"My dad called. He said they'll come get the kids." He sits down in a plastic chair that's sitting against the wall across from the bed.

"Where were they?"

"I don't know. Did the doctor come in?"

"Not yet. Another nurse came in and checked me. I'm dilated one centimeter."

Sam sincerely hopes Jake disappeared for that particular event, but judging from the fact that he's still alive and seems perfectly healthy and happy, it's pretty safe to assume that he did not.

"Did she say anything else?"

Quinn shakes her head, and Sam tells Jake to text his grandparents and tell them which part of the ER they're in. The sooner the room can clear out a little bit, the better Jake does as he's asked and then slides off the bed and says he's going to find a bathroom. He actually doesn't even complain when Ethan says he needs to go with him, and he just drops his phone in Sam's lap to hold until he gets back. It buzzes just a few seconds after Jake and Ethan disappear, and Sam looks down assuming it's either his mom or dad texting back. But it's not. And Sam doesn't _really _mean to snoop, but it's right there in front of his face, so what is he supposed to do?

It's Kaley, who is apparently just replying to an already ongoing conversation. And maybe Sam scrolls up just a little bit, but it's not like he's purposely trying to spy or something. It's just kind of interesting to see that apparently Jake texts girls now… And judging from the maxed out 500 stored texts from this particular contact, he apparently texts them a lot.

It's mostly a boring conversation. He doesn't scroll up too far because he honestly isn't trying to read his son's phone. But he glances at the last little bit and manages to decode through the text speak and bad spelling to see Kaley saying that Jake should come over tomorrow so they can "hang out." And then saying that her parents will be at work but they can "swim or something." And really? Since when does Jake "hang out" with girls? This doesn't happen, to the very best of Sam's knowledge. And Jake just answers and says he's at the hospital right now and, "I think my mom's having the baby, so I'll probably be at my Nana's." And then Kaley replies and asks if he'll send her a picture of his sister when she's born.

"What are you doing?" Quinn catches him red-handed, and she looks at him over Hunter's head who has now crawled into the bed and is drawing on the back of an old receipt. Sam hands her the phone, and she reads through it quickly and just looks at him in question. He shrugs because what? He was not aware that any of this was actually occurring. She hands the phone back to him just in time, right before Jake and Ethan show back up.

Sam's glad, too, because he doesn't even want to imagine the drama that would ensue if Jake suddenly decided he was being spied on.

Still, though. It's a pretty interesting revelation…

Sam's parents finally show up and take the kids. It still takes another twenty minutes _after _that before the doctor even shows up. He does a quick examination and says Quinn's probably just having "late pre-term pain," which sounds kind of like an oxymoron or something, but whatever. He says they're not real contractions and that she isn't dilated enough to actually be worried. He just tells her to go home and rest and to lay on her left side if she starts having more pain.

He does say, though, that the baby might be ready to come "a little early" and that they should talk to their doctor about it.

It's all kind of pointless, and they don't actually find out anything. Quinn's pissed obviously, especially since she has a doctor's appointment the day after tomorrow and is supposed to find out her scheduled delivery date. She's having a C-section because she had to have one with Ethan's complications and was told it would be too risky to do anything else with Hunter or this one. It's kind of nice in a way, knowing exactly what day the baby's coming.

But it's also kind of jarring to realize she could really come any time she wants to, judging by her little display tonight.

When they're getting back in the car to go home, Sam's kind of hit with the reality that the next time they're here, they're probably going to have four kids. That's a lot. Like, a _lot._

He suddenly feels very, _very _unprepared.

…

A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed on the last part! It means a lot!


	14. Chapter 14

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 14**

…

Quinn starts getting antsy about a week before the scheduled due date.

Despite the fact that she's already got a C-section scheduled, she seems bound and determined to speed things up. She says she's sick of being pregnant and wants the baby out now, and when the doctor refuses to move up her delivery, she basically makes the decision that she'll put herself into labor and _force _her to.

She apparently goes online and finds a whole list of ways to induce labor, but she really just sticks to the basics. She starts eating the spiciest food she can get her hands on, she walks at least two miles a day, she even does some crazy kind of visualization crap that ends with her rolling her eyes and cussing.

But she puts most of her faith in sex and basically tells Sam he's got no choice but to appease her.

Now don't get him wrong- he loves sex and appreciates the increase in both enthusiasm and frequency. But there's only so much he can do, okay? It's kind of physically impossible to keep up with her, not to mention really kind of irresponsible considering the fact that she's apparently decided that they should just leave the kids to fend for themselves while the two of them lock the bedroom door and just go at it multiple times a day. It's nice in theory, but it doesn't really work like that.

When Sam tries to gently explain that _maybe _they're going a little overboard, Quinn flips on him and accuses him of being disgusted by her. That's not even a little bit true, considering the fact that he honestly thinks being pregnant makes her even more beautiful than she is naturally. When that doesn't fly, she goes a different route and tells him that he won't be having sex for _at least _six weeks after the baby's born and that he better get his fill while he can.

So he gives in (of course) and does whatever she wants. But he's honestly exhausted, and there literally comes a point when sex feels more like an obligation than anything else. It's tiring and annoying in a way sex with a beautiful woman should never be.

What makes it worse, though, is that it doesn't even work.

…

He can't sleep at all.

Even if he _could _sleep, he wouldn't because Quinn's up and doesn't appear to be going to bed anytime soon. He thinks about telling her she needs to rest, but she's probably well aware of that and might snap at him if he points out the obvious. She can't sleep, either, and who can really blame her? In less than twelve hours, they're seriously going to have four kids, and that sounds like way too many all of a sudden. But it's happening one way or another.

Quinn's repacked the suitcase about fifteen times already, and he's not surprised to walk into the bedroom and find her doing it again. She's got everything laid out and folded- their clothes, the baby's clothes, toiletries, everything she's already put into the bag over and over again.

"I'm sure it's all there."

She looks over her shoulder at him and shakes her head like he's interrupting her. He knows she's only doing it to keep herself busy. She can't sleep, so she needs something productive to do. This isn't productive, though- it's redundant. It'd be better if she was in the living room watching infomercials about vacuum cleaners or something.

"I'm already hungry." She sounds annoyed, and he doesn't doubt that she is. He's only had a couple of surgeries, but he knows not being able to eat or drink anything is one of the worst parts. It's got to be even worse when you're pregnant and constantly hungry to begin with.

He tries to change the subject. "Do you wanna watch a movie or something?"

"I want to eat a cheeseburger."

He starts to laugh but stops when she shoots him a look that's definitely not joking. Instead of making it worse, he decides to be "helpful" and starts refolding some of the clothes on the bed. He's not going to do or say anything to piss her off or annoy her tonight. He's going to be perfect.

It apparently works because she speaks to him a couple of minutes later. "I'm really nervous."

He can look at her and tell it's the truth. He's not sure what exactly she's nervous _about- _if it's the surgery or the fact that they're having another baby- but he puts an arm around her waist anyway. "It's going to be fine."

"I don't even know why." She's looking down at the clothes she's methodically moving back into the suitcase, clearly avoiding looking at him. "I'm just scared."

"You'll do great. Everything's going to be good."

He's nervous, too, but he won't let on. It won't do them any good if he admits to be worried, too, especially since they've done this before and know exactly what to expect. But it's normal, right? It's normal to be worried before any kind of surgery, especially one that ends in a totally life-altering event.

She finishes putting everything back in the suitcase, and he lifts it and puts it back on the floor after she's zipped it up. They've both already showered, and there is seriously nothing else to do but sleep. But he knows sleeping probably isn't likely for either one of them, so instead he just asks if she wants to lay down with him. He kind of expects her to say no, but she says yes and crawls into bed without too much coercion.

They just lay there for a little while, talking about stupid stuff, but they can't avoid the topic of tomorrow forever, so he finally brings it up. "Are you sure about getting your tubes tied?"

They've talked about it, and they're both in agreement that this is the last and that four kids are more than enough. And the doctor told them that it's easiest to just do the procedure directly following the delivery, since there won't be an extra surgery involved. But it's so _final, _and Sam can't help feeling a little doubtful about it. Yeah, they'll have four kids, but he still thinks they're relatively young- there are still a lot of years left where they could change their mind. On the other hand, he will literally have had kids in his house for thirty straight years by the time the baby graduates high school…

But Quinn nods. "I'm positive."

He's not going to argue with her. It's just something he's been thinking about, even though he knows logically that they definitely won't _need _any more children after this. Not to mention the fact that it will be really nice not to have to worry about anything anymore- that's definitely a plus. They've always had to be really careful because apparently getting pregnant is super easy for them or something. Every time they've wanted to get pregnant, they've been able to make it happen within a month or two, so they've always had to be extra careful during the times when they're _not _trying to have a baby. So it'll be nice to at least have that worry taken care of.

They don't go to sleep, but it's nice to just lie there for awhile. The house is totally quiet, and who knows when it'll be this quiet again… It's just peaceful and relaxing. He likes just being alone with her, and it wasn't really that long ago when he didn't have anything like this. He was alone for a long time, and he used to just pray that one day things would change. They did change- _fast- _and he's thankful for every single second now. But it's still a little weird to think of how different things are now than they were just a few years ago.

Quinn curls into him, as much as she can, and he's a little surprised when he can tell she's falling asleep. He doesn't go down quite as easily, though, but he just lays there with her and lets his index finger trace little shapes on her belly. This is literally the last night he's ever going to see her pregnant, and it's a little sad.

But tomorrow will be amazing.

...

He's right, if by amazing, he means incredibly stressful.

The surgery's scheduled for ten o'clock, but they have to be at the hospital by seven. Luckily, his parents have the kids, so they don't have to fight with waking anybody up or getting any of the kids ready. They just have to focus on themselves and making sure they've actually got everything they need. And when they actually make it out the door by six-thirty, Sam's honestly a little bit shocked.

Most of the morning is spent doing paperwork and just basic prep work. They get checked in, Quinn gets a quick once-over from a nurse after she's changed into a hospital gown, and then they spend a lot of time just waiting around in between IVs and other random stuff.

Quinn's a lot calmer in the morning than she was the night before, but that starts changing sometime around eight-thirty when other people start showing up.

Her mom and stepdad are the first to arrive, and they come with bags full of stuff for the baby and probably for the other kids, too. Sam's not that bothered by their arrival, but Quinn tends to have very little patience where her mother's concerned, and after the fourth time Judy asks if she needs anything, Quinn snaps and tells her to stop annoying her.

His parents show up about nine, though, and that's when it gets stressful. It'd be one thing if it was just his parents- that might actually be helpful because his mom has a knack of distracting Judy when she starts bugging other people. But it's not just his parents; it's his parents _and _all the kids, and that's not exactly an easygoing setup.

Jake is tired and spends most of the morning curled up against the arm of the little in-room couch with his head down and his eyes closed. Ethan and Hunter, though, are very hyper and are running around being chaotic despite several threats from nearly every adult in the room. And every time a nurse comes in to check the IV or deliver another dosage of medicine, the kids want to know every single detail of what's happening and why.

Sam's actually relieved when one of the nurses comes in and tells them they're ready to head out.

That's another mess, though. Jake wakes up long enough to say a half-hearted bye, and Ethan and Hunter both deliver hugs and kisses when they're instructed to. But then a couple of people come in and actually start moving Quinn's bed out of the room, and Hunter has a total freak out and starts _screaming _for Quinn the second the bed's halfway in the hallway. She looks worried as she turns around and tries to see, but Sam doubts she sees very much because they've got her all the way in the hall by that point. Luckily, he manages to intercept Hunter right as he tries to make a break for the door and follow.

"Hey," he says quickly, and he squats down to Hunter's level. "We're just going for a little bit. We'll be right back, I promise."

Hunter's crying, and he shakes his head like he doesn't believe it. "I wanna go!"

"You can't go," Sam says gently. "But I promise we're just going to be gone for a little while. You stay here and play, and we'll be right back."

This doesn't work, and Hunter's practically choking on his own giant crocodile tears. "No!" And he's shaking his head and looking really pitiful.

"Hey, I bet Mimi might have toys," he says hopefully, looking past Hunter at Judy and praying he's right. She smiles and nods, though. Thankfully. Hunter notices this, too, and it seems to appease him slightly. "You go play, and me and Mommy will be right back, okay?"

It works, and he manages to make it out of the room without a toddler clinging to his leg. When he sees Quinn in the hallway, though, she looks worried and sad, like she feels guilty about leaving Hunter crying. "Is he okay?"

Sam nods because he feels guilty, too, but he's not going to let on. "Your mom brought presents. He's fine."

…

He hates everything about C-sections.

He hates having to put on scrubs and stand there helpless while a doctor sticks a gigantic needle into his wife's back. He hates feeling useless while all the doctors and nurses fuss around with the prep work and Quinn just lies there on a table with that same scared look on her face. And he hates how crazy long everything feels despite the fact that the whole thing really only takes a matter of minutes.

He doesn't watch the surgery. He tried once, for about two minutes, and then he couldn't take it anymore. He doesn't need to see a scalpel slicing into skin of blood leaking out. He doesn't need to literally look down and see insides being cut into. Maybe he's a wimp, but it's gross, okay? So he stays at the head of the bed with Quinn, and he holds her hand and just waits with her. And when she starts looking a little bit antsy, he just pushes her hair back and tells her everything's going to be okay.

But then they hear it- crying- and he looks up just in time to see the first glimpse of the baby as the doctor pulls her up and suctions out her nose and lungs. And then the cord's cut, and a nurse wipes her off and wraps her up, and then he finally gets to hold her. And it's just perfect.

He immediately sits back down in the chair beside the bed so that Quinn can see, and they're both just looking at this gorgeous, perfect thing. The baby's still crying, but even that sounds perfect right now.

"Hi, baby," Quinn's voice is quiet and not at all edged with nerves or anything else. She sounds kind of in awe, but he can't really blame her, considering what she's currently looking at. He's kind of in awe, too.

"She looks like a Riley, doesn't she?" He's not sure why, but she does, and Quinn nods in agreement.

"She's so cute…"

He should probably be taking pictures or something, but he'll get to it in a couple of minutes. They've only just got a little bit of time before the doctor interrupts them and says, "You want to go ahead with the tubal ligation now?"

Quinn nods, and a couple of nurses come back over to help. Another nurse comes over and tells them they need to take the baby to the nursery for cleanup and asks Sam if he wants to go, too. He nods and holds the baby over for Quinn to kiss one more time. Then he leans over and kisses her really quick and says, "We'll meet you in recovery." Quinn smiles at him and nods, and he hands the baby back to the waiting nurse so that they can wheel her back to the nursery.

This is all nearly identical to the way things happened with Hunter, so he already knows what's going on. It was a little different with Ethan because he was a preemie, and they took him to NICU right away, but everything was normal and by the book with Hunter. Sam follows the nurse and the baby into the nursery where an older lady comes over to help with the bath.

"This one's a looker," she says, smiling at Sam who nods and keeps one eye on his brand new baby girl. It's not a lie. She's definitely gorgeous, even right now when she's screaming in protest to the water being scrubbed over her. She's got a little peach fuzz of really, really light hair that's running over the top of her head. Ten toes, ten fingers, two ears… He looks her over while they bathe her and makes sure everything's perfect.

When they get her dried off and diapered, it finally hits him to take a few pictures. So he snaps them in her makeshift bassinet while the nurse grabs her a standard onesie and a little pink hat to wear. And it hits him like a ton of bricks that this is his little girl. He actually has a _daughter, _and he's not sure why, but all of a sudden, she seems a ton more overwhelming than the boys.

"Eight pounds, six ounces. And twenty-one inches long," the nurse announces after she lifts her off the scale and jots the numbers down on the bassinet card along with her name and the official time of her birth.

He gets her alone in the recovery room for a few minutes while they wait on Quinn. He snaps a few more pictures and then sits down with her. And then he gets to look her over again, and he picks up each tiny little hand and counts all the fingers. She's the biggest of all his kids, but she still seems so tiny and fragile, even with her chubby cheeks and pudgy little feet.

He's pretty positive that he has literally never seen anything more beautiful in his whole entire life.

Quinn gets wheeled in pretty quickly, and a nurse checks to make sure that she's situated in bed correctly and says to rest and to call if they need anything. Then she leaves, and Quinn immediately holds out her arms for the baby. He hands her over, careful to lay her at a good angle that doesn't put too much pressure on Quinn.

"God, she's _gorgeous." _Quinn's voice is still that total amazement, and he understands completely because he feels the same way.

He sits down on the edge of the bed and looks down at them. He doesn't care what anybody says- there's nothing more amazing than watching the woman you love hold your newborn baby. Like seriously, nothing in the whole entire world feels like that.

"She's for real the prettiest thing I've ever seen," and he's not even exaggerating.

He reaches over and grabs the formula bottle that the nurse left and hands it to Quinn. She takes it and moves her arm a little bit, trying to make Riley open her eyes. She's sleeping comfortably, but when Quinn fits the bottle into her mouth, she starts eating almost right away. Her eyes do eventually flutter open for a couple of seconds, and he's not surprised to see that they're the same light blue color that Hunter and Ethan's were when they were born. They'll undoubtedly turn green in a few months, though, but they always start out blue.

"How big is she?"

"Eight pounds, six ounces," Sam relays, glancing at the bassinet to make sure he's remembering correctly.

"You're a little chunk, aren't you?" Quinn's smiling so much that it's kind of crazy, but Sam's not sure he can do much besides smile, either. "Are you ready to meet your big brothers?"

Riley lets out a little sniff in reply. They'll take that as a yes.

…

They stay there for a little while, just looking at the baby and enjoying the quiet until a nurse comes back and says they can move back to the room. She asks how much the baby ate and if she burped and writes down some stats on the chart. She checks Quinn to make sure there's no sudden excess swelling or anything, and then she helps her into a wheelchair. Sam takes the baby, and then they all head back to the hospital room they left a couple of hours ago

Sam is swarmed almost immediately, as everyone jumps up and wants to see the baby. Quinn manages to escape the swarm as the nurse helps her back onto the bed and gets her situated comfortably. He's a little bit jealous considering the fact that he has four grandparents and three kids all trying to see the newest addition at the same time.

He wants the boys to see her first, though, and luckily, the parents seem to realize this and back off just a little so that he sit down and bring the baby down to her brothers' level. Even Jake seems eager to see her, and he leans over the armrest for a better view. Hunter and Ethan seem to be having mixed reactions, and Sam tries explaining to them that this is their little sister. They've been talking about it for months, but he's not really sure anything has sunk in until this actual moment.

"My sissy?" Hunter asks, and Sam nods. He looks a little bit confused, but he reaches out to touch her face anyway.

"Be gentle," Sam tells him, catching Hunter's hand before it lands too roughly. He lays it gently on Riley's face and shows him the right way to touch a baby, and then Ethan follows suit and copies. "This is Riley," he tells them, and Hunter repeats it while Ethan just moves his fingers over her cheek and down her nose. Somebody is taking pictures, but Sam's not really concerned with that at the moment.

Jake wants to hold her, and Sam is glad he's showing interest, so he says okay and just tells him to be careful. He shows him how to hold his arms and then carefully lays Riley down on them. She's wrapped up and still sleeping heavily, so she doesn't even flinch when she's passed. It's a little bit crazy and something hits him in his gut when he sees his oldest kid holding his youngest, and it doesn't seem at all possible that Jake should be old enough to stand up and hold a baby on his own. But he is, and it's crazy because it literally feels like just yesterday when Sam was in a hospital room holding _Jake. _

He's not really all that surprised when Jake gets tired of holding the baby after only a minute or so and hands her off to his nana who is more than eager to take her. Jake then goes over to Quinn and starts talking to her, and Sam talks to everyone else who all want to know how big she is and if the surgery went okay and a bunch of other stuff that he answers without having to really think about. But then he hears his dad telling Hunter to stop doing something, and he looks over to see his two year old trying to climb into the bed with Quinn.

Sam grabs him before he actually makes it and picks him up. "You can't climb on Mommy right now," he tells him, realizing for the first time that trying to keep both the little kids off of Quinn for the next couple of weeks is going to be a nightmare.

He gets his first glimpse of it right then, too, because Hunter has a total freaking _meltdown _that's even worse than the one he had that morning. He's crying and immediately trying to struggle free. Sam tightens his grip on him and holds him down so that Quinn can at least hug him or kiss him or something, but that doesn't help at all because Hunter just starts squealing and wiggling some more as he tries to get himself down to the bed. Sam pulls him back up and shakes his head.

"Stop," he says seriously because he's in no mood for a tantrum right now. He also needs to make it absolutely clear that they have to be careful. "Momma's belly hurts, she can't hold you right now."

It doesn't work, and Hunter is literally kicking and shoving at Sam's shoulders trying to get down. He's also still crying and acting insane, and maybe this is going to be a whole lot harder than they thought.

He takes Hunter into the hallway, mostly to get Quinn out of his immediate sight but also to try and calm him down. Hunter's still throwing a fit, and several people from the nurse's station look their way to see what all the fuss is about.

"Hey," he says sharply, grabbing both of Hunter's hands in one of his own so that he can't hit or shove anymore. "Stop it." And he tries to make his voice as firm as possible because nine times out of ten, Hunter generally responds pretty well to tone. Ethan's the one you have to threaten, but Hunter usually calms down when he knows somebody's serious.

He calms down a little to the point where he stops screaming, but he's still crying, and Sam feels really bad for him. He actually hiccups in the middle of a pitiful little, "I want… Mommy!" sob.

"I know," Sam says soothingly, letting his hands go and rubbing his back a little bit. "But Mommy's got a boo boo, and we have to let it get better. She can hold you when it's all fixed." Sometimes it's really hard breaking things down to a level that toddlers can understand, but he tries. Hunter's lip is still quivering, but he's not sobbing anymore, so that's at least a good thing. "Do you like Riley?"

Hunter shakes his head, and Sam can't help smiling because even though it's obviously not great, it _is _a little bit funny. Still, though.

"She likes you. She told me she really needs her big brother."

"Me?"

He nods. "You. She loves you. So you need to help her and show her how to act because she's just little. You need to show her how to be nice and good, okay?"

Hunter nods a little, and Sam hopes to God he's doing something right, or this whole thing could end up going really, really bad.

The elevator dings open, and Sam just happens to look over right when his brother and sister get out, and they both spot him and head over that way. Stacy's all smiles when she immediately grabs Hunter and blows a raspberry into his neck. This, of course, makes him squeal and then giggle like crazy, which is a whole lot better than the whole tantrum thing.

"Is your sister here?" she asks, knocking her head against Hunter's, and he nods and giggles again when she says, "Let's go see her!"

She disappears into the room with Hunter and barely even acknowledges that Sam's standing there. Stevie, though, looks at him and says, "This is for real the last one, right?"

"For real."

"Thank God." He laughs when Sam reaches out to smack the back of his head and shove him into the room.

…

The whole day is full of people coming in and out, and by 8:30, Sam is literally ready to fall over. One glance at Quinn, and he knows she's feeling exactly the same way.

Riley's sleeping in her little bed, and she doesn't need to eat again for another two hours. They could totally just pass out and go to sleep, and that's exactly what he intends on doing. He's just about to tell Quinn his plan, though, when she randomly bursts into tears.

Now, okay. She just had a baby like ten hours ago, so he has no doubt at all that her hormones are crazy out of whack. Still, he's not really sure about the random crying because literally _nothing _happened to trigger those tears.

"Are you okay?" he asked carefully, sitting down beside her and doing his best supportive husband thing.

"What if they hate her?" she asks hysterically, and Sam's more than little bit confused.

"Who?"

"The boys!" she says like it's the most obvious thing in the world. "What if they hate the baby?"

"They don't hate her."

"Hunter's so confused!" She seems hysterical, out of control like almost instantaneously. It's insane.

Hunter was back and forth all day- sometimes he was okay and sometimes he was upset- all the way up until it was time to leave and he had another meltdown, begging and screaming to stay until Sam's dad had to literally pick him up and put a hand over his mouth just to quiet him down and keep him from disturbing the whole damn hospital.

"He'll be fine," and Sam's not a hundred percent sold on that, but he's pretty sure. "He just needs to get used to it."

"We should have prepared them better…" She finally slips from the hysteria, but now she just sounds miserable.

Sam thinks they prepared them as much as possible, but there's only so much you can do to get a two year old ready for an infant. Or anything for that matter. Stuff has to actually happen where they can see it before they can get any kind of real grasp on it.

"I just don't want them to feel bad," she says sadly. "They're so little!"

"They're _fine," _he says, and he pulls the blanket up around her a little bit. "Come on, let's take a nap before the baby wakes up."

Quinn sniffs, but she's obviously tired enough to agree. "Lay down with me." He does what she asks and climbs into the bed with her. It's a tight squeeze, but they've done this enough times to know it works and that there's enough room. Plus, the stupid pull out beds in here are fucking _horrible._

He wraps an arm around her shoulder and actually loves the way she has to curl into him. "Try to get some rest," he whispers, and he kisses her forehead because it's right there by his lips. She puts an arm over his waist, and he can feel her relax.

"Thank you for being so awesome," she says quietly, and he kisses her again.

"Thank _you _for making the most awesome kids in the world," and he squeezes her a tiny bit. "And also the most gorgeous."

"She is pretty stunning, huh?"

"Out of this world."

It's not a lie.

…

A/N: Thanks for reading and for the reviews on the last part! The baby's finally here… Now if everyone can just adjust to her…


	15. Chapter 15

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 15**

…

Things aren't exactly perfect at home.

Honestly, Sam didn't consider the fact that there might actually _be _issues. He thought about them, imagined worst case scenarios… but he convinced himself that they wouldn't actually happen. Everything was going to be fine and perfect and work itself out just like always.

He didn't count on his sweet, mild-tempered little baby to suddenly get hit with the world's worst case of the Terrible Twos and turn from almost angel into total freaking demon child.

Hunter's always been the quiet one. People have always commented on him, saying that's how younger kids just are sometimes, especially ones with ultra-chatty older siblings. And Ethan _definitely _fits that bill. Sam always just kind of assumed that Ethan talked enough for both of them. Hunter didn't _need_ to talk as often, so he just didn't. And for two years, he's kind of just tagged happily along after Ethan.

But apparently he was just hoarding it all inside or something because all of a sudden, he's got a _lot _to say.

Of course, he's two, so a lot of what he has to say is pretty incoherent. A lot of it actually just equals screaming because there are about four-thousand different things that piss him off at any given moment, and in true two year old fashion, Hunter seems pretty chill to just scream about them instead of trying to verbalize them.

It's just crazy.

They bring Riley home late Friday morning, and everything goes really great til about mid-afternoon- then the other kids come home. To be totally honest, Sam is really excited for them to be back, and he's happy when his dad brings them home because he's missed them a ton. He's seen them every day since they've been in the hospital, but it's only been for a few hours, and he's ready for them to all be back under the same roof again.

It starts out great. The kids are happy to be home and are full of hugs and kisses, and Sam almost immediately has both Hunter and Ethan climbing into his lap. Ethan immediately starts telling some story, and Hunter is yammering along in agreement. Sam's just happy to have them back, though, so he agrees with everything they're saying.

"Where's the little one?" Sam stops paying attention to whatever his kids are saying and looks up at his dad who's leaning against the back of the sofa where he's dropped the kids' bags.

"Quinn's got her in the nursery." She just went back for a diaper change a couple of minutes ago, and she hasn't yet made it back to the front. Sam starts to stand up, and Ethan jumps off his lap. Hunter apparently doesn't want to move, though, so he picks him up and leads the way back to the nursery.

"Momma!" Ethan runs past him and nearly tackles Quinn who laughs a little bit and puts a hand on his head to steady him.

"Hey, baby. Are you happy to be home?" Ethan tilts his head all the way up and nods. "And you, too?" She smiles at Hunter and leans in to kiss his nose right before she picks the baby up from the changing table.

"What's that?" Hunter asks, eyeing the newly arrived infant very suspiciously.

"You know what it is," Sam tells him. "That's your sister."

But Hunter just shakes his head.

"That's not your sister?" Another head shake. "So what is she?"

"That mean."

"She's not mean." Sam watches Quinn pass the baby to his dad who holds her out for Hunter to see and tries to prove his point. "See? She's sweet."

"No, mean!" Hunter seems very angry all of a sudden, and he apparently doesn't like anyone paying attention to Riley because he immediately starts holding his arms out and saying, "My Papaw!" in an attempt to get said Papaw to ditch the baby for him.

It doesn't work.

…

Things don't get much better.

Hunter starts having meltdowns over any and everything. It gets so bad that _Ethan _finally yells at him to be quiet. Needless to say, two kids yelling at each other doesn't do much for a brand new infant who's trying to sleep, and it's not long at all before Riley's awake and crying because the noise is obviously too much for her.

So yeah, it's not so fun.

The baby's only a week old, but she's already caused enough drama in the Evans household to last an eternity. She doesn't do much, as most babies don't… except sleep and eat and poop. This apparently is not enough to keep her brothers interested, and Ethan basically ignores her existence ninety percent of the time. Hunter just can't stand that she's even real and throws huge fits every time somebody dares to pick her up or pay any kind of attention to her at all. Jake, though, is actually doing pretty well with it- better than he did with the boys anyway. He didn't do _awful _with any of them, but he was mostly disinterested and sometimes jealous when they were babies. With Riley, though, he doesn't seem to really show any of that. He's helpful and does things without having to be asked. He keeps his brothers company and distracted when they start getting too antsy about lack of attention. And he just overall seems to be doing really well with it.

Sam, on the other hand, is totally exhausted.

It's not that he forgot how much work babies are- he has really good memories of that, it's just that he somehow tricked himself into believing that fourth time's the charm or something. Like maybe this baby would be magical and sleep through the night and not be super fussy and just be an angel. Unfortunately, magic isn't real. Or if it _is _real, it's buried somewhere in the mountains of Scotland or England or wherever Hogwarts is supposed to be- he never really figured that out. Anyway, point being: babies _suck._

Now they can be awesome. You know, when they're happy and sleeping in their swings or patiently lying in their cribs waiting on a bottle. Unfortunately, that doesn't happen all the time, and lots of times, they just don't know what patient is. Riley's actually not awful, at least she's not the worst they've had, and she gets on a schedule pretty fast. She needs to eat every two hours, but during the night, she manages to sleep pretty well and actually only wakes up about three times.

Not so bad, right? Maybe. If there was literally nothing else happening in the world.

But Sam goes back to work immediately and ends up working extra because Quinn's checks on leave are just a little over half of what they normally are. Plus, there are a million extra expenses with extra diapers and formula and all those little things that babies need. So he's tired from working, and he's tired from everything else, too. Quinn just had major surgery, so she's not exactly at one-hundred percent, so there's lots of stuff he has to do for her and help her with. Then there're the kids, which is a feat all on its own. He basically has to do everything as far as Ethan and Hunter are concerned because Quinn can't lift them, she can't get down and give them baths. She can put their pajamas on and make them food, but that's only if she can get away from a screaming baby long enough, and Riley seems to have a built-in sensor that goes off whenever one of the other kids needs something. His mom comes over a few times a week to help out, but now that Quinn's home, she's off full-time babysitting duty. So thank God Jake's around because he kind of takes over during the day most of the time.

In fact, Sam comes home one day and finds Quinn and Hunter asleep on the sofa and Jake and Ethan in Riley's room. Jake has the baby in the glider, and Ethan's sitting on the ottoman with a book open on his lap "reading" the story out loud and signing along as well. It's totally peaceful and sweet, and there's a part of Sam who just wants to take a picture because these are the kinds of moments that make everything else worth it.

The boys notice him when he shows up, though, and he smiles at Ethan and says, "Are you reading to Riley?"

He nods. "And to Jake."

"And to Jake." Sam smiles again and goes over to lift him up only so he can steal his seat. He pulls Ethan back into his lap and takes the book. "You want me to read to you?"

Ethan nods and leans his head back to look up. "Yeah, you read."

"Okay. You tell Jake."

Ethan agrees to this, and Sam starts the actual story. It's about a talking Easter egg, and it's August, but whatever. He reads the story, and Ethan follows along with the pictures and actually does a really decent job of translating it. Obviously Jake has absolutely zero interest in a kid's book about Easter eggs, but he's not an asshole or anything- he actually sits there and lets Ethan tell him the story, and when Ethan doesn't know the sign for basket, Jake balances the baby in his lap and helps him.

And right there in that moment, everything is really good.

…

Quinn's exhausted.

Sam's exhausted, too, but Quinn walks around looking like a zombie most days. Obviously he'd never tell her that (he likes his testicles where they are, thanks), but she's worn out and looking a little worse for the wear. She hasn't put makeup on since they've been home, and her hair rarely goes anywhere besides a ponytail. She's doing good to just get a shower most days, but it's not like anyone can blame her.

What's crazy, though, is that despite the fact that she's too tired to even change out of her pajamas some days, she spends plenty of time making sure that Riley is ready for a Baby Gap contract at any given second.

Sam actually has a whole day off on Thursday, which is awesome because maybe it means they can do something together as a whole family for once, and plus, he _might _get to rest a little bit if he can somehow conduct an hour or so of family naptime at some point during the day. Everybody gets up, and Quinn says she'll do breakfast. She says she actually wants to cook and starts breaking out the eggs and turkey bacon. Sam gets the kids up and actually makes the boys put on real clothes (he also thanks God for the millionth time that at least Ethan is finally potty-trained). And he gives Riley a bottle while Ethan and Hunter chase each other around the house and Jake sits on the kitchen counter and nearly falls back to sleep.

And when she's done eating, he decides to go ahead and get her dressed as well.

He's actually kind of proud of himself because he picks out, what he thinks, is a really cute outfit for her. She has more clothes than God, so she's yet to wear the same thing twice (and probably won't for months). He picks from her newborn section, though, and puts her in a sundress and some really cute leggings and those little socks that look like sneakers. It's cute, okay? Or at least _he_ thinks it is. Quinn, though, is less impressed.

"Where's her bow?" It's the first thing she says when he carries the newly-dressed, ready for the day baby into the kitchen.

He looks down at Riley's admittedly bare head and then back up at Quinn who is scooping eggs from the skillet onto five plates. "I didn't put one on her."

"Clearly." Quinn stops what she's doing and looks at him. "She needs a bow."

"Why?"

"So people know she's a girl!" Quinn gives him this duh look like he's an idiot or something, and while sometimes that look is justified, he really doesn't think now is that time.

"She's wearing a dress…"

Quinn doesn't break the look. "She needs a bow," she repeats slowly. "She has no hair, Sam. Do you want people thinking your daughter is a boy?"

He has no idea what she's talking about, but whatever. "Uh, I know she's a girl, and you know she's a girl… Who else is she going to see at breakfast?"

"Put a damn bow on her head," she says flatly right as she smacks Ethan's hand away when he runs up and reaches for a piece of bacon. "And get one that matches her leggings because she'll spit up on that dress soon."

He could stand there and argue with her that she's ridiculous and borderline obsessed, but he'd rather not deal with the outcome of that. So he just shuts his mouth and takes his very beautiful, and clearly female, daughter back to her bedroom and opens up the bin labeled "Bows and Headbands" and digs through the 509,020,289,022,918 bows until he finds one the exact same shade of purple as her leggings.

And this is what his life has become.

…

Jake has an early morning orthodontist appointment, which means Sam has to get up even earlier to get the little kids to his mom. Quinn can't keep the kids by herself, and without Jake around to entertain and distract his brothers, she can only keep Riley alone. It's not so bad, though- the orthodontist is close to his parents' house, so he just drops Ethan and Hunter and then takes Jake to get his braces tightened.

It's a pretty normal situation, and they've done this enough times that it's almost mundane. The only thing that makes it slightly out of the ordinary is the fact that although Jake is well-past the age of going back on his own, Sam still has to go with him and interpret because no one who works in the office is capable of communicating with Jake on his own. Sam knows it's annoying and that Jake hates the fact that he still has to depend on other people even though he's growing up, but that's the reality. When he was little, it wasn't a big deal, but most twelve year olds should be able to see the dentist alone or have an eye exam without a parent sitting right there. But Jake needs someone with him in most every situation outside of school, and Sam knows that's got to suck, so he tries really hard not to make a big deal about it.

Sam's known the orthodontist for a long time. Both his brother and his sister got their braces here, and Jake's been coming here for more than a year, so he knows him well enough to at least have a little bit of a conversation without it being totally awkward. Unsurprisingly, most of what they talk about has to do with Jake's teeth, and Dr. Wagner seems pleased with the progress and says they'll probably finish a couple of months ahead of schedule and that Jake might be out of braces by the end of the year. That would be awesome and definitely be one less thing to worry about because orthodontist visits are frequent and time consuming. Being done with braces would be amazing- at least for the next seven or eight years anyway.

Sam refuses to think of how much braces of the future will cost. Times three.

When they're done with the tightening, they leave with a new appointment card, and Jake asks if they can go eat. It's kind of early for lunch, but Sam's still getting used to this whole Jake actually wanting to eat thing, so he says okay. It's weird, and it's definitely a big change, but Jake eats all the time now. Sometimes he literally eats all day. He needs it, though, considering he's grown two inches since the beginning of summer.

Sam takes him to this noodle place that's close to his parents' house. It's probably the best option considering the fact that Jake says he's starving but is already complaining about the pain in his mouth. Noodles are soft and easy to eat, and even if it's not the most balanced meal imaginable, it's still better than mashed potatoes and jello.

They talk about some random stuff while they're waiting on their food to be ready, and Sam asks Jake if he's excited to go back to school. The first day is just two weeks away, and Jake just shrugs, which is pretty standard. Also probably pretty true. He's probably got mixed feelings- dreading it because it's school, but also kind of happy because at least he'll get to be around his friends again. And then there's the added bonus of being able to get away from all the nonstop craziness at home.

When their number's called, Sam goes back to the counter and gets their food and brings it back to the table. Jake digs in immediately, and Sam's still not used to seeing that. In fact, he brought him here a lot when he was little, and always the pickiest eater, Jake would twirl noodles on his fork the whole time and manage to get away with taking two bites total. A lot's changed since then, though- it's definitely not the same little kid sitting across from him now. No, now there's a half-grown person on the other side of the booth, shoving food into his mouth and stopping only when his phone buzzes in his pocket.

Sam watches while Jake reads the text and writes back, and he's a little cautious of actually asking straight out questions, but he does anyway. "Who's that?"

Jake looks at him and doesn't answer for a second. Then he says it's Kaley and slips the phone back in his pocket.

Kaley. The lovely Kaley who texts all the time and wants to "hang out" and who is suddenly causing a lot of interest from Sam's oldest child.

"Does she text you a lot?"

He expects an eye roll or a get out of my business look, but all he gets is another disinterested shrug before Jake goes right back to his noodles. Sam should drop it. It's not his business, and really, anything he says is just going to either make Jake mad or embarrass him. But it's his kid, okay? He wants to know what's going on in his life.

"Do you like her?"

And okay. He could probably come up with a smoother way to slide into that one, but whatever. Maybe coming right out and asking is good. Besides, if he starts these kinds of conversations, maybe one day Jake will feel comfortable starting them. And Sam wants that. He's freaking the hell out about Jake growing up and all that, but he doesn't want to be shut out. He wants to have open channels of communication, and he wants Jake to know that he can _trust _him. It's probably idealistic, but it is what it is.

He's almost totally shocked when Jake actually answers with yet another shrug and then follows it up by saying Kaley's pretty.

So that's new.

The last Sam checked, girls weren't pretty. They were cool, they weren't fun, they weren't even nice. Definitely not pretty. Jake's not wrong, though- Kaley _is _pretty. She's always been a cute kid, and she's smart, too. But still. It's just weird.

What's even weirder is when Jake keeps going and tells Sam she wants to go to the carnival with him. It's a fundraiser carnival- actually a pretty big deal. Sam got off the hook for help for the first time in years, thanks to the new baby, but normally, he has to volunteer and put in his hours. He was kind of hoping to skip the whole thing this year, and up until now, Jake hasn't even mentioned wanting to go.

And Sam's super confused. "Like a date?"

No, not a _date. _Jake gives him a _you're dumb _look and tells him that a lot of his friends are going. Kaley just needs a ride, and it's okay if they pick her up, right?

Sam wants to call him out on it, but he doesn't.

…

"He says it's not a date."

"What is it? A _group thing?" _Quinn's sitting up feeding the baby while Sam gets ready for bed.

"Yes." He peeks his head into the bedroom from his place in the joining bathroom.

"It's a date."

"I _know _it's a date." He spits a mouthful of toothpaste into the sink and rinses as quickly as possible, so that he can actually have a conversation face to face. "But I can't tell him I know that."

"Well, you can't let him go on a date. He's twelve."

"I know that."

"But you also can't tell him he can't hang out with his friends. He's old enough to do that."

She's not being very helpful, but he doesn't point this out. "So what am I supposed to do?" He pulls his shirt over his head and sinks it into the nearly full hamper.

"I guess you have to let him go and keep playing dumb."

He lets out a frustrated sigh, and his aim is not quite as good when it comes to his pants. Quinn looks at the jeans on the floor and then back at Sam in a very pointed way until he rolls his eyes and picks them up.

"Here," she passes the baby over when he sits down and sets the empty bottle on her nightstand. "Handle your daughter's gas issues, would you?"

He sighs again but leans back and puts the baby up to his shoulder to try and get some burping action in while Quinn gets up and disappears into the bathroom. "So I let him go out with a girl to a very big carnival _by himself _and just pretend like I don't know what's up?"

"If you don't let him go, he's going to be pissed," she calls back. "And besides, there probably _is _going to be a group there. They won't be alone."

"So you think it really is a group thing?" That doesn't sound nearly as bad.

"Yeah." He hears the water turn on and shut off a few seconds later. "That doesn't mean it's not a date, though."

Well, fuck.

…

He's still not sure how he feels about this not-a-date.

To be honest, he doesn't care what Jake calls it or doesn't call it- two kids going somewhere together by themselves is a date. And Jake's twelve. Twelve is too young for dates, and he's really starting to rethink all of it. Quinn tells him he's overreacting when he voices this concern, and she says they're old enough to be okay on their own for a little while and that there will be plenty of people they know around at the carnival if they need something. Not to mention the fact, she points out, that they are meeting more of their friends there, so it's not like it will really be just the two of them by themselves. And she's right, and Sam knows it, but it's still hard to think about because twelve still sounds really young, no matter how you spin it.

But he deals with it. And he promises himself that he's not going to make a big deal out of it or do anything that might make Jake self-conscious about it because he really _is _trying to establish some kind of open communication line. That way, when Jake's finally ready to admit that it's a date, he can hopefully feel more comfortable talking about it. Yeah, Sam does a lot of on-the-fly parenting, but when it comes down to it, he really does want Jake to know he can talk about whatever without having to be embarrassed or discouraged.

So yeah, he deals with it.

They pick Kaley up at her house, and Sam's kind of surprised at how big it is. Her dad is a journalist, and her mom works in a library, so it never really occurred to Sam that they might be fairly well off, but judging by the neighborhood and the size of their house, they must have money coming in from somewhere. Kaley runs out to the car without having to be summoned, and she climbs into the back with a huge smile on her face. She looks older, too- just like Jake and everybody else he knows. It's like over the past year or two, they all went from being little kids to being not-so-little almost teenagers, and yeah, it's kind of weird.

Kaley smiles at Jake and signs something Sam doesn't quite catch because he's too busy making sure he doesn't run over any rich kids who happen to be swarming her neighborhood on expensive bikes. Then she says hello to Sam, and actually _says _it, and they actually have a little conversation about how she is (fine) and what she's been doing this summer (Japan) and her opinions on Riley (very cute).

Kaley can hear and speak, thanks to a Cochlear Implant that she got a few years ago. She was born deaf and actually has deaf parents, but she was fitted with an implant when she was eight, which is relatively late compared to most kids. Because she was already eight at the time of her implant, her speech is still very far behind the kids her age who can hear or who were implanted when they were babies, but she's improving a lot.

Sam's done a lot of research on CIs and has been around lots of kids who have them. When Jake was first diagnosed, an implant was very much on the agenda because he was at a perfect prelingual age to be fitted, and everything Sam read said that there was a great chance that he would be able to develop near normal language skills right on time with other kids. But then every specialist and doctor had the same news- Jake wasn't a candidate. He wasn't born deaf; his hearing loss was caused by an accident, and that accident caused major physical damage in both of his ears, which made his chances of being successfully implanted basically slim to none. So all the doctors said it wasn't worth it to put a baby through that kind of major surgery if there was little to no hope of it actually having any effect.

So they dealt with it. They learned sign, they got him enrolled in a deaf preschool program, they did everything they really could. When Jake was younger, his audiologist would try fitting him with hearing aids, but because he was so profoundly deaf, there was basically no effect. Even with a super high powered aid, he could only pick up certain decibels, which always seemed pretty useless. Not to mention the fact that Jake hated those hearing aids and would cry and whine every time one was put on him. So they just stopped- it wasn't doing any good, and Sam wasn't about to make him wear one and be miserable if he wasn't even getting anything from it. They just accepted it- Jake was never going to hear, and he was never going to talk. That's just the way it was and the way it's always been.

There are some kids in his class, like Kaley, who have implants, and there are others who can hear to small extents on their own or with hearing aids. But they all have ASL as their first language and English as their second, and their school has one of the highest literacy rates of deaf schools in the country. They get a good education, which is important obviously, and really that's all anybody can ask for. Jake likes his school. He's generally successful there, when he's not dicking around and getting into trouble, and overall, it's really done nothing but good things for him.

And now here he is, getting out of the car at that school with a very pretty girl who smiles and says, "Thanks for the ride," before climbing out after him. And all Sam can do is watch them disappear into the crowd because, like it or not, they're growing up.

It's scary, but it's happening no matter how he feels.

He watches them go and tries not to feel as anxious as he really does. He just sits there for a couple of minutes, even though plenty of cars are speeding around him looking for parking spots. He's kind of in a daze, but then somebody catches his attention. It's the president of the PTA, and she's smiling at him and waving as she walks through the parking lot toward the gate. It snaps him out of his current situation, and he gives her a smile and a wave back.

And then he hightails it the hell out of there before she can make it to his car window and ask for help with something. Yep, his worry at kid being on a not-a-date is outweighed by the desire to do absolutely fuck nothing for this fundraiser.

At least for this year anyway.

…

A/N: Sorry this took so long! Hopefully the next one comes a lot more quickly.


	16. Chapter 16

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 16**

…

There's nothing more annoying than waking up from a deep sleep to a screaming alarm clock.

Well. Except for waking up to a screaming baby, that is.

It's crazy to think that something so small can be that loud, but Riley's got a set of pipes on her, and she definitely doesn't mind using them to get what she wants. So when she starts screaming in the middle of the night, there's really no point in ignoring her. She demands attention and isn't one of those babies who will just cry herself back to sleep. And damn, she can wake up a whole house within minutes.

It's 2:16 when she starts screaming, and Sam wakes up almost immediately. Or at least he gets to that place in between being asleep and being awake- like he can't quite make himself believe he really has to wake all the way up- or maybe it's just denial.

Quinn's awake, though, barely, and he feels her roll over and press against him. "Please get her," she mumbles.

He mumbles something back in return, and he's not even sure what he's saying. He's not even sure he's actually wake.

"I'll give you five-hundred dollars to go…"

"We don't have five-hundred dollars." He hears himself saying that much and hears Quinn giggle a little bit.

"Stop," she kicks him, and he finally opens his eyes and sees that hers are still closed. "_Please, _Sam."

There's no point in arguing. Somebody has to get up, and if they don't do it soon, Riley's going to wake Ethan and Hunter up, and that's going to be even worse. Sam's exhausted, but he knows Quinn is, too, so he forces himself to get up because somebody has to do it.

Riley's in her own room and has been for a couple of weeks. She stayed with them in their bedroom at first, but it's not a habit they have any desire to get into, so she's been in her own bed in her own room, and it's actually been a pretty easy transition.

But it sucks in the middle of the night. It sucks a lot.

He switches on her light when he gets to the nursery, and after blinking a few times to get used to the light, he peeks into the crib and sees Riley screaming and making the unhappiest face imaginable.

"Hey, there," he whispers, and he picks her up in an attempt to stop her from screaming so much. It doesn't work, so he bounces her a little and tries talking some more. "Why are you screaming, baby? Huh?"

He checks her diaper, and she's not even wet. It's not time for her to eat, either, and he really doesn't want to mess up her feeding schedule because that'll be a bitch to deal with later. So no, she just wants to scream to scream. She must love the sound of her own voice or something, but that's really nothing new.

He's kind of in love with the glider, though, so he doesn't totally mind being able to slink down into it and rock the baby. It's cool, too, because sometimes that's all she wants. She's still all crying when he sits down with her, so he pulls her up to a higher angle and just gives her the stare down. She stops for maybe three seconds and just looks at him, but then she starts screaming again.

"Why are you so angry? I know your life is _super _dramatic."

She doesn't answer because she's like a month old, but he's pretty sure she understands him. He hums to her a little and kind of rocks her to the beat. She digs it- clearly she has good musical instinct, but he's not surprised. Eventually, she stops with the screaming and moves on to just random whimpers. And then she finally finds her fist and decides it's more interesting than continued screeching.

She's weird. She's probably going to be a thumb sucker, but she won't take a paci at all. Hunter was the same way, and breaking him of the thumb sucking is an ongoing process, considering the fact that he's got it back in his mouth every single morning when they wake him up. Riley, so far, seems to be following the same path, and her favorite hobby so far is fitting her fingers and hands into her mouth. Currently, she's got her fist in, knuckles first, and she's sucking on them with an actual slurping noise.

"Does your fist taste yummy?" Again, she doesn't answer (month old…), but she keeps right on sucking on her hand. "You're lucky, kid," he tells her seriously. "Most people can't fit their whole fist in their mouth, but you've got really good mouth genes."

He doesn't even hear anybody coming down the hall, so he's surprised when he looks up and sees Jake walking into the room looking tired and pretty messy. He's not really sure what Jake's doing up, and since he's the one person in the house _not _affected by Riley's middle of the night screams, Sam's a little curious as to why he's awake.

"What are you doing?"

Jake just looks at him and doesn't answer. He just walks across the room and sits down on the ottoman. Sam asks again, signing as best that he can with one hand and depending mostly on Jake's lip-reading skills.

Jake doesn't answer the question, just replies by saying that he hates school.

This is not something Sam really wants to hear, considering all the trouble they had last year. Jake's only a couple of weeks into seventh grade, so if he's already hating it, they're probably going to have a lot to look forward to for the next ten months…

"What's wrong with school?"

Jake says there's too much homework, and Sam realizes for the first time that his son didn't randomly wake up in the middle of the night- he hasn't even been to bed. He tries to think back and remember if Jake came home and wasted a lot of time after school messing around and playing video games or something, but he really doesn't think he did. He doesn't remember if he went straight to his homework, but he was already working on it before dinner. If it's taken him _this _long to do it, then there's a serious problem.

"Are you finished with it?"

Jake says finally and keeps that frown on his face while he lets out an annoyed sounding sigh. Riley turns her head just a little bit and looks at him, still sucking away hungrily on her fingers. Jake looks at her for a few seconds and then goes back to Sam and asks why you can't remember being a baby.

Sam's never really thought about that. He has a memory of his fourth birthday party, but he's not really sure he remembers anything from before that. Maybe like random flashes that he can't actually put an age to, but that's his first real memory. It's weird, though, to think about how his kids won't remember the stuff that's happening to them on a daily basis. But he doesn't know why, and he says so. "Nobody does. I don't know why."

Jake accepts the answer but obviously doesn't appreciate it- not that Sam's surprised, considering it's completely a non-answer. He waits a couple of seconds and then asks if Sam remembers when _he, _Jake, was a baby.

"Yeah, of course."

Jake asks if he could hear back then, and Sam nods.

"Yeah, when you were really little like Riley."

And then Jake goes a totally different route and says that he doesn't remember his mom at all. And then he goes on to say that it's not fair, and Sam agrees with him. It's _not _fair. Jake says it's not fair that he can't even remember his mom when everybody else has one. Obviously not _everyone _else has a mom, but Sam can't really think of anyone Jake knows that doesn't. None of his friends have parents who are dead, and obviously none of his siblings have to deal with that situation. So no, it's not fair.

It's strange, though, having Jake talk about it. He's mentioned it a few times in the past few months, more than he ever has before, but it's still not something he brings up a ton. But it makes sense right now because Jake knows how old he was when his mom died, and now that he's wondering why he can't remember being a baby, it's no wonder that he's thinking about Julia, too.

Jake _looks _like Julia. People who don't know look at him and think he looks like Sam. He does a little bit, like in the nose and mouth and randomly their hands, but that's basically it. He's got the exact same shade of eyes that she had- so dark blue that they're almost navy- and he's got random dark eyelashes just like she did. His hair is still really light, almost the same baby blonde that his brothers have despite the fact that he's not a baby, and it's gotten really thick and started to curl over the last few years. He kind of looks like he has permanent hat hair with the way it's wavy and then curls out at the ends. And unlike Sam and the rest of his family who pretty much stay white unless they're burning (and then turn white again), Jake's got a darker skin tone, and he tans super easily and stays brown for a pretty good portion of the year. All of that is Julia. And he acts a lot like her, too, sometimes- like it's the most random thing in the world, but the face he makes when he doesn't like the way something tastes is _exactly _the same face Julia would make. Just little things like that, but it's crazy anyway.

They don't say much after that for a little while. Riley's eyes eventually start closing, and her fist sucking tapers off. Sam should probably tell Jake to go to bed, especially since his own eyes are drooping a little, but he lets him stay until Riley actually falls back to sleep.

Sam puts her back in the crib and starts to turn off the light, but he stops because Jake stands up and randomly says that if Sam dies now, Riley won't remember him. It's totally and completely random, and it honestly just kind of hits him and makes him stop for a second because seriously… What the hell?

Because he doesn't know what else to say, Sam says the most logical thing that comes to his head. "I'm not going to die."

But Jake just looks at him and blankly tells him that he could. And then adds that his mom did, as if Sam is somehow unaware of this fact.

Sam can't argue it. He can't say he's sure he's not going to die tomorrow because it would be a lie, and obviously Jake knows firsthand that promises like that can't be kept. He knows how Julia died and knows that it was random and not something that anybody predicted or anything. And he's old enough and smart enough to know that the exact same thing could happen to Sam on the way to work tomorrow.

"Are you _worried _that I'm going to die?"

Jake glances away for like half a second, looks at the baby, and then back at Sam. He doesn't directly answer the question, but he asks one of his own instead. He wants to know what will happen to _him _if Sam dies. And then he asks if he'd stay with Quinn.

"Yeah, of course. She'd still take care of you."

And then Jake asks if he's sure because she's not his "real mom."

"I'm sure," and Sam says it without thinking about the fact that this is actually something that has never been discussed- but it's just kind of understood. "She would still keep you."

Jake nods and seems to accept the answer, but Sam still feels really uneasy about the whole thing. He can't figure out where any of it came from and if Jake has actually been thinking about this for awhile. If he has, then it makes him wonder what else he's been thinking of and keeping bottled up inside of him.

He hugs Jake before they finally go to bed, and he tells him he loves him just like he does every night. But then he hugs him again, just to make sure it really sinks in.

Because honestly? He's kind of freaked out about Jake's sudden concern.

…

Quinn's feeling a lot better lately, and she's able to do just about everything she was before, which means she can take care of the kids by herself now. Jake's back in school, so she's only got the three little ones, and even though that sometimes gets out of hand, she doesn't need help with the day to day stuff anymore. Sam's mom still comes by a couple of times a week to watch the kids, so she can relax a little bit, but most of the time, it's just her and the kids.

Sam's off on Wednesday, though, so he gets up to take Jake to school and then comes back home. It takes awhile, though, because there's a lot of traffic, and the school traffic is crazy for some reason, too. He actually sits in line for a good fifteen minutes just trying to get into the parking lot, and when he finally makes it to the door, Jake barely says bye before jumping out of the car and heading toward the school. Sam just rolls his eyes because he can't imagine how he's possibly embarrassing his son by merely driving him to school, but apparently it's very possible.

When he _finally _makes it back home, Ethan and Hunter are just now eating breakfast. They've started sleeping a little bit later, probably because they're getting less actual rest during the night thanks to their screaming sister, but it's okay because it gives more time to get Jake ready and out the door and to take care of Riley's morning routine.

"What're you eating?" Sam slides into an empty chair beside Ethan who is poking around at some scrambled eggs with his fork.

"Eggs." Then Ethan makes a face and says, "It's yucky."

"Why is it yucky?"

"Because Momma cooked it."

Sam snorts with laughter before he can stop himself, and Quinn hears both the insult and the laugh and turns around to glare at them. Sam smiles at her, even though she probably wants to kill him. Ethan, though, is totally oblivious.

"When does Nana come back?"

"I need to teach you how to talk to women, dude. You have zero skills."

Ethan doesn't seem too bothered, but it gives an opening for Quinn to pipe up with her own opinion. "Yeah, I don't really think you're an expert, Romeo."

Sam looks over at her and shakes his head. "I got you."

"I was tricked."

"I tricked you?" She nods. "How?"

"Well, the first time, I was conned by falsified hair."

"Really?"

She nods again. "And the second time, I was distracted by how little and cute Jake was."

Sam tries really hard not to laugh because he doesn't want to be murdered, so instead, he steers the conversation and looks back at his son. "Can I eat it?" Ethan shakes his head. "Why not? You don't like it."

"It's mine."

"You don't share? That's mean."

"You're mean."

Sam shakes his head. "I'm not mean."

"Uh-huh," and Ethan giggles a little bit when he nods in counteraction.

"I'm going to be mean when I eat your breakfast."

"No!" And Ethan laughs when he moves his fork as far out of Sam's reach as he can manage.

"Then eat it!" He grabs him and tickles him for good measure, and Ethan screams and laughs until he finally starts eating the eggs, just to prove that Sam cannot have them. Sam pretends to be offended and then shoves his head for good measure before looking across the table at Hunter. "Why aren't _you _eating?"

Hunter doesn't answer. He just gives Sam a mean look and kind of glares down at his own untouched scrambled eggs. He's obviously not in the mood to joke, which isn't shocking because he's almost always in foul moods these days.

So Sam just leaves him alone because if he tries to push or even joke around, Hunter will end up getting frustrated and angry and will probably have the beginnings of a meltdown.

…

He brings it up to Quinn while they're in the bedroom folding laundry.

Riley's asleep in her swing, and Hunter and Ethan are playing in their room. There's still an hour before Jake will need to be picked up. Quinn is talking nonstop, obviously happy to have someone else around that's not a child under five, but he totally understands that because being around the kids and no other adults for any significant amount of time can make somebody go crazy. When there's finally a break in conversation, though, he just comes out and asks her.

"If something happened to me, would you still keep Jake?"

Quinn stops mid-fold and just looks at him. Her face turns totally serious and she says, "Why? Is something wrong?"

He shakes his head. "No. No, nothing's wrong. Jake just asked me."

"He asked you if I would keep him?"

Sam nods. "Yeah. Like if I died or something."

"Why did he ask you that?"

"I don't know. It was really random. He was talking about how he can't remember being a baby and can't remember his mom or whatever, and then he just asked me what would happen to him if I died, too. And he wanted to know if he'd stay with you."

"Of course he would." Quinn shakes her head a little, obviously confused. "I mean, that's what you'd want, right?"

"Yeah. I just never thought about it before." He goes quiet for a few seconds and then says, "We need to like make it official or something. Just in case."

"Where is all this coming from?" Quinn's obviously trying to figure out what's actually happening, but it's nothing. He's just never thought about it too much before, but now he realizes that it could potentially be very important.

"We just need to be prepared. Like what if something happened to both of us? Who would take the kids?"

"I guess your parents…"

She's probably right, but just imagining something happening and it having to turn into a legal battle or something makes him uneasy. He remembers being told that somebody was going to fight him for custody of Jake, and it wasn't fun. It can't hurt to be prepared because there's no way of predicting what might happen.

"I think we need to make a will or something." And yeah, it sounds kind of morbid, but it's the truth. He's only thirty-two, so the thought of needing a will is kind of overwhelming, but he's got four kids now- that's a lot to think about.

Quinn just looks at him, but she nods slowly. It's obvious that she's not totally sure where all this is coming from, but she doesn't necessarily think he's crazy or anything, either. "Okay. We can do that."

"I just want to make sure there's a plan, you know? Just in case something happens. To me or to you or both of us, or whatever."

"I'll always take care of Jake. You don't have to worry about that."

It's a relief to hear it, even though he already knew it. He never wants to entertain the thought of ever leaving his kids, but it's good to know that they'll all be taken care of one way or another. Quinn is Jake's mom in everything but blood anyway- she's been around since he was little, and she's always taken care of him and treated him like her own.

He knows that wouldn't change, but it's good to hear it said anyway.

…

Quinn's rocking the baby in bed one night when Sam gets out of the shower. The other kids are in bed or at least supposed to be- Jake may very well still be up doing God only knows what, or possibly homework. Riley is smiling a little and not fussing, probably because Quinn is brushing their noses together and engaging her.

She hands the baby over when Sam sits down, though, and he plays with her bare feet a little, even though his mom told him that makes kids stutter (probably a lie). She's got all her fingers in her mouth, as per usual, and he's still a little stunned by how gorgeous she is every single time he looks at her. All his kids are attractive, but she's a girl, so it's different. She's like… _beautiful _or something. Even if she's only a few weeks old.

"We're gonna have to buy a gun when she's a teenager." He's not even joking, but Quinn rolls her eyes.

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves or anything."

"You don't understand."

"Understand what?"

"You don't know what goes on in teenage boys' minds."

Another eye roll. "You think I've never known any teenage boys? You think I didn't know _you?"_

He ignores that, mostly because he was actually a very respectful teenage boy, and she knows it. Regardless, he knows what goes on in their heads, and he's not looking forward to his daughter being the focus of any of that, no matter how far off that may be. "We might have to homeschool her."

"Okay. You take care of that." Quinn shakes her head at the baby and says, "Your daddy's an idiot. Don't listen to him."

"I'm being serious! Look at her now and just imagine what she's going to look like when she grows up. Dudes aren't gonna stand a chance."

"You know what's crazy?" Quinn's not looking at him, instead, she's letting Riley grab one of her fingers in the hand that's not currently engaged with her mouth. "I've got this brand new baby girl, and Beth is a senior this year."

"What?" She looks up at him, but he can't believe that. "For real?"

She nods. "Yeah. That makes me feel really old."

He can't believe that, but he trust her on it. It's insane, though. She goes back to avoiding his eye, and he figures it's because she doesn't feel very comfortable talking about it. She never has, so it's rare that she even mentions Beth. She's moved on from it, but maybe that's something you never fully get over.

He thinks it's crazy that Jake can be in seventh grade, but it's even crazier that Beth is apparently in _twelfth. _

"I wonder where she wants to go to college?"

Sam doesn't know whether he's supposed to actively participate in this conversation, or if this is more just one of those things where he's supposed to let Quinn talk out her thoughts. It's been a long time since she's even mentioned Beth, so maybe he's just supposed to let her think out loud. She looks at him, though, like he's supposed to answer or something, so he just kind of shrugs.

"I'm sure she's smart enough to go wherever she wants."

"She's probably already had senior pictures done and everything."

Well. Yeah, she probably has. He doesn't know what he's supposed to say to that. "They're gorgeous, I'm sure."

"It's just weird. I can't believe she's already this old." She doesn't necessarily sound _sad _or anything, just kind of thoughtful. "You don't grow up," she tells Riley, taking her back and cuddling her. "Stay this size forever, okay?"

Riley yawns in response.

Sam's on board with that, though. If they could just hit a button and freeze time right now, everything would be pretty damn awesome. Jake would stop getting too big. Ethan and Hunter would stay sweet and funny. And Riley would be an adorable baby forever and never turn into the subject of teenage boys' dirty minds.

It would be fantastic.

Overall, right now is kind of perfect.

…

A/N: Thanks to everyone who read and reviewed the last part. I know these are taking a little longer to get out, but life is kind of hectic. You guys are amazing!


	17. Chapter 17

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 17**

…

Quinn says she wants to start getting out of the house more, so she starts making up excuses to go places like the grocery store and the mall. Sam's fine with it because he knows she's probably bored to death at home with the babies, so he doesn't call her on it when she claims they need milk and margarine even though there's some of both in the fridge.

She takes Riley and leaves him with the boys, and she's only been gone for like ten minutes when Jake comes into the living room and announces that Kaley's coming over because they have a history project. Sam just looks at him at first because… what the hell, he knows better than to just invite people over without asking first. He almost tells him no, that she can't come over, but then he decides not to be an asshole and, instead, just tells Jake that he needs to ask first before he tells people they can come over. Jake says he's sorry (and doesn't look like he means a single word of it), and then says she's on her way.

This Kaley thing is really weird, and Sam's not sure at all how he's supposed to be handling it. It's not like Jake calls her his girlfriend or anything, but he's starting to talk about her nonstop. And every time Sam goes to school to pick Jake up, he's sitting outside on the stairs with Kaley instead of in the main area where most of his other friends are. He has to be careful, though, because he doesn't want to embarrass Jake, and he doesn't want to jump the gun and start being one of those nosey parents. He wants to know what his kids are doing and what's going on in their lives, but he doesn't want to be so into their business that they start sneaking around. He wants some kind of happy medium.

Jake runs to the door when the doorbell rings, and he's opening it and letting Kaley in before Sam even has a chance to like talk to her parents and see what the plan is or anything. When he gets to the door, her mom's already driving away, and it makes him wonder how long Jake and Kaley have been planning this. It kind of doesn't seem like a last minute development.

Kaley says hi to Sam and to Ethan and Hunter, but Jake keeps her pretty distracted and motions for her to follow him to his room so that they can get started on their homework. There's a part of Sam that has instant panic because he's probably not supposed to be letting them go to a bedroom alone together, but he glances down the hall and sees that the door's still open, and he decides to just try trusting a little.

He gets distracted anyway because Hunter runs up and starts begging Sam to play with him. He tells him okay because he doesn't get a ton of time to hang out with his kids anymore, so he grabs Ethan, too, and drags them into the backyard for some fresh air. He plans on playing some kind of game where they run around the yard and chase each other (a safe go-to game), but Hunter runs straight to the trampoline, and Ethan runs after him, obviously down for the idea.

Judy and Roger bought the trampoline for Jake's birthday when he was like nine, so technically, it's his. He doesn't have much use for it anymore, though, and only plays on it on rare occasions. The little kids like it, but they're not allowed on it without somebody else out there, so they either have to drag Jake out (and get him to agree) to play with them, or one of the adults has to go. Quinn won't step foot on the trampoline, but Sam kind of thinks it's fun, even if he is like twenty years past the target age. Whatever.

There's a safety net, which is a good thing because the kids are kind of little, and their favorite thing is to sit down and let Sam bounce them higher than they can bounce themselves. Maybe it's not the safest thing in the world, but it makes them super happy, and he doesn't care if they're screeching loud enough to be heard across the neighborhood because they're laughing and having fun. And he loves hearing his kids giggle like that because it makes them laugh, too.

And honestly? He feels kind of bad for Ethan and Hunter these days, and he feels like he hardly ever gets to just hang out with them anymore. So if they want to play on the trampoline, he's down for it, too.

Of course, it doesn't take very long for the kids to turn on him and team up to tackle him. He could easily take them both, but he lets them win because they're laughing so hard that it's kind of the funniest thing ever. He's got one kid holding down his ankles and another sitting on his chest, so he goes for the easiest way to recover and starts tickling. That, of course, sets off the screaming again, but he flips on them and gets them both in one swoop because he's just that swift.

But then Ethan screams, "Momma!" and he sees that Quinn is back and standing across the yard watching them with a half-amused/half-exasperated look.

"Help?" she asks, once it's clear that she's got his attention. "Please?"

He leaves the trampoline then, grabbing both the kids and setting them back on the ground to go play while he runs across the yard and back to the front of the house where Quinn's got the trunk popped and the backdoor open.

He gets Riley out first because she's starting to get fussy at the lack of companionship, and he sets her carrier down on the ground beside the car before going around to the back and helping Quinn with the unloading. Apparently she really loves being out of the house because there's way too much food here, and it's obvious that she went a little overboard on the shopping. He doesn't say anything, though, because that's not safe.

"Where's Jake?"

Sam shakes his head and looks at her. "Kaley came over, so they could work on their history project together."

"She's here right now?"

"Her mom dropped her off about an hour ago. They're studying in his room."

Quinn just stares at him. "I'm sorry. Did you just say that there's a _girl _in Jake's room?"

"They're just doing homework."

"Are you _insane?" _He kind of gets the impression she really wants him to answer that. "I was doing _homework _when I got pregnant."

"They're twelve."

"Yeah, I don't care how young they are, they're too old to be alone together in a bedroom."

He's confused for a second, trying to think over what she just said, but she's shaking her head and grabbing Riley before he gets all the way through it. She's gone, headed straight back into the house, so he grabs a couple of grocery bags, yells for Ethan and Hunter, and follows her.

Riley's on the sofa, crying from her carrier, and he hates hearing her be unhappy, so he drops the grocery bags by the door and goes over to get her out. Ethan and Hunter come running in, too, bypassing him and heading straight for their own room. Riley stops crying almost immediately, and he straightens out her dress a little bit and walks down the hall toward Jake's room.

The door's open, and Quinn's leaning against the doorframe with her arms crossed. She's doing a really bad job of trying to look casual, and he can tell she's going for the "cool mom" thing and, in her head, is not actually embarrassing Jake in the least. She's failing, of course, and Jake looks super uncomfortable and looks over her head at Sam when he shows up. He gives him this _help me _look, and Sam nods as discreetly as possible while Quinn chats away, asking questions about school and the project.

To be fair, it looks totally innocent. They are actually doing homework- they both have their books out, and Kaley's filling up a notebook with notes and stuff. She's sitting at the desk, and Jake's lying sideways across his bed on his stomach. They're not touching, they're not even close to each other. Nobody's getting pregnant. Quinn seems less convinced.

It doesn't matter anyway, though, because the second Kaley spots the baby, she jumps up and runs over to see. She hasn't seen her in person yet, only in pictures, and obviously she's really excited. Jake, unsurprisingly, is not impressed, but he sits up when Kaley asks if she can sit down and hold her. She sits down beside him on the bed, and Sam hands the baby over. It's very obvious that she hasn't been around many babies and doesn't have much experience holding them, but Riley's not _super _tiny anymore, so it's fine. She does start crying, though, which isn't surprising because she has an aversion to sitting still. Jake actually takes care of it, though, and reaches over to rub that one spot right behind Riley's left ear that usually makes her calm down and relax. He's much more patient and attentive to her than he is with either of his brothers, but that's probably because she doesn't bug him 24/7 and constantly shove herself into his space. Sam can sympathize with intruding little siblings, but Jake's not nearly as patient as Sam was at that age, so he gets annoyed a lot more easily.

Kaley says the baby is _so cute, _and obviously that's not a lie. She holds her for a little while until she starts crying again. Quinn takes her then and tells the kids maybe they should move to the living room where there's more room to spread out. It's not-so-subtle, and Jake immediately protests that the babies will bother them. Sam runs interference and promises to keep the little kids out of the way- it's easier than arguing with Quinn and telling her that they're fine in the bedroom. Then he tries to make up for it a little bit by telling Kaley that she can stay for dinner if her parents say it's okay. Jake looks suspicious, but Kaley seems happy and says that she'll text her mom and ask.

Jake needs to just be thankful that Sam successfully gets Quinn out of his business. At least for a little while anyway.

…

A spot opens up at a preschool near their house, and since Quinn works with the director's husband, they're able to get Ethan in last minute.

Kindergarten is next year, which seems totally crazy, but it's happening one way or the other. Ethan's never even been to daycare, so it's probably a really good idea if he at least gets in some kind of organized environment experience before he actually starts school.

But it's also a little worrisome because Ethan, even though he can be the sweetest kid in the world when he wants to be, can also be a holy freaking terror.

Out of all the kids, Ethan's the one who stays in trouble the most- although lately, Hunter's been vying for the title pretty heavily. But overall, Ethan's the one who generally can't behave for long periods of time without getting into some sort of trouble. Jake was never really that bad, but he was an only child and didn't have to compete for anyone's attention. He would do stuff occasionally or randomly decide he was a badass, but he was actually pretty good for the most part. Truthfully, Sam probably let him get away with a bunch of stuff, but it was his first kid, and when Jake was little, it was really hard to even effectively communicate with him. But overall, he wasn't bad, and it's only been over the past few years that his attitude has started to get a little out of control.

Ethan, though, has been a defiant little crazy kid since the day he was born. He's always been the one most likely to be in the corner, just because he refuses to listen. And he's a pusher- he loves to see just how far he can push. A lot of the time, he's just totally directly disobedient, probably just because he _can _be. Tell him to sit down, and he'll start running laps around the room. Tell him to lay down, and he'll start pulling the sheets off his bed. He just doesn't like following directions at all.

So needless to say, they're a little worried about how he's going to behave in preschool.

He's never been around much outside authority- his parents and his grandparents, and that's basically it. He's had a little bit of exposure in Sunday School, but there hasn't been too much else. So Quinn spends the night before the first day trying to tell him how important it is that he listens to his teachers and does what they say. Sam doesn't really get involved, but he kind of eavesdrops on the conversation, and he can already tell this isn't going to go over well. Ethan says he doesn't want to go and that he doesn't like his teachers (despite the fact that he's never met them), and Quinn tells him that he has to mind them or he'll get in trouble. Ethan clearly doesn't care because he keeps changing the subject and asking for an ice cream sandwich.

Yep. Should be awesome.

…

Sam's mom comes over to watch Hunter and Riley so that Sam and Quinn can both take Ethan to school, and it starts going downhill immediately.

First of all, Ethan decides he wants to stay with Nana and starts screaming when Sam tries to put shoes on him. It's one of those full-out fits with kicking and screaming, and his foot actually makes contact with Sam's side pretty roughly. It's not fun. Meanwhile, Hunter starts having a meltdown, too, screaming that he wants to go with Ethan and that it's not fair. Quinn loses it and screams back until Hunter's crying.

And yeah, it's just not a good morning…

The only good thing is that there's hardly any traffic at Jake's school that morning, so they get him dropped off and don't get too far off schedule. Ethan, who's been pouting since he was forced into the car, starts crying when it's time for Jake to leave. Sam's really surprised when Jake's actually nice and leans over to hug Ethan before he gets out. Those random times when Jake's really kind to the little kids mean a lot because more often than not, he's mostly just annoyed with them.

But then it's off to preschool, and Ethan calms down for a little while- long enough to get in the door anyway. They find his classroom and show him all the other kids having fun, and he's actually okay. He even does okay when they introduce him to his teacher, and he doesn't show his terror side to her, which is obviously a good thing.

But then it's time to go.

Sam helps him out of his backpack and hangs it up on one of the little pegs with the other backpacks, but it's like that's what specifically triggers the panic button in Ethan. It apparently alerts him to the fact that he's about to stay while his parents are about to go, and he immediately grabs onto Sam's leg and starts shaking his head.

"Daddy… Daddy, no. I…" He bites down on his lower lip and starts stuttering. "I have to tell you something."

"What do you have to tell me?" Ethan's got a really tight grip on the leg of his pants, so Sam just puts a hand on top of his head and tilts it up so that he can see his face.

"I don't want to stay here." And he sounds so quiet and pitiful that Sam actually feels awful. Jake never did this to him, but Jake also started school when he was two and not really able to comprehend the fact that he was going to be left alone somewhere for a good portion of time. "Please…"

His lower lip starts trembling, and it's clear that he's about to cry for the hundredth time this morning. Quinn looks really upset, too, and she bends down to Ethan's level and kisses the top of his head before standing back up and saying, "I can't do this," to Sam. "I'm going outside."

He starts to protest, especially because her sudden absence is the final trigger that actually sets Ethan's tears off. He wants to be mad that she's leaving him alone to deal with this, but he gets it. She's not good with this kind of stuff, it's just not really in her wheelhouse. She's a great mom, but when it comes to tears and the kids being upset, he's better at handling it than she is.

Sam glances around and finds an empty chair at one of the nearby tables. It's approximately three inches off the ground, but he takes it anyway. When he sits down, it puts him much closer to Ethan's level, and he puts both hands on Ethan's shoulders and looks him right in the eye.

"I know it's scary," he says seriously. "But you're not a baby. You have to go to school and be a big kid now."

"But why?" Ethan's voice is really small and still sounds very scared. "I don't want to…"

"It'll be fun," Sam promises. "And then when you get home, you can show Hunter everything you learned. That'll be fun, too."

"I want him to come here."

Sam gets the separation anxiety thing that goes on between the boys. They fight a lot, but they're also each other's primary playmate and closest friend, so splitting them up isn't always easy. He saw the same thing with his brother and sister, and he remembers how they fought all the time at home but gravitated toward each other in almost every social situation. That didn't change when they got older, either, because they pretty much had the same core group of friends and hung out with each other basically all the time. They even ended up going to the same college, and they still live in the same city, not very far from each other. They still fight- _constantly- _but they're also really there for each other all the time.

"Hunter's too little," Sam tries to explain it as simply as possible. "He can't come til he's four."

"I'm four."

"I know. So that's why you have to go to school. You can be like Jake."

"But Jake's big…"

"So are you. You get to be big now, too. Don't you want to be like Jake?"

Ethan kind of shrugs and looks down at the floor. He's not crying anymore, which is a plus, but he doesn't seem super into this whole preschool thing, either.

"You stay here at school and have fun for a little while, and then Momma'll come pick you up, okay?"

"It's not gonna be fun."

"Yeah, it will," Sam tries to smile like that proves it or something. "Here's your teacher!"

She walks up to them and smiles. "Hi, Ethan. I'm Ms. Angie." Sam's only met this woman once, so he's impressed by her ability to memorize faces and names of kids she's never even met. She seems super nice, and Ethan doesn't seem intimidated by her or anything, so that's good. "Are you ready to make friends and have fun?"

She holds out her hand, and Sam's super shocked when Ethan actually takes it. He seems a little apprehensive, but nothing too bad. Sam takes that as his cue to leave, and he pushes a hand through Ethan's hair and tells him to be good before he holds his fist out. Ethan looks at it and then very slowly bumps it with his own. Sam makes for the exit then and gets out without a fresh wave of tears or anything.

Quinn's waiting in the car, still looking worried and obviously guilty, like she feels bad for sending her kid to preschool like the vast majority of other kids his age. Sam feels bad, too, just because Ethan's obviously scared and hasn't really ever been in that kind of situation before. But it will be good for him. He needs as much of a head start as he can get, especially if the whole dyslexia thing turns out to be true. Sam doesn't want him getting teased if he can't pick up on the reading and writing thing as fast as other kids when he gets to kindergarten and first grade, so if he can get a basis of it now, that can only be a positive.

"Did he cry?" Quinn immediately questions him when he gets into the driver's seat and shuts the door.

"A little. But he wasn't crying when I left."

"What if he's miserable?"

Sam turns the key into the ignition and buckles his seatbelt. "His teacher seems really nice. And Ethan's cool, he can make friends." He's trying to calm both their nerves, but what he's saying is actually true, so that helps.

"He just looked so pitiful…"

"He'll be fine. I guarantee that tonight he won't shut up about how much fun it was."

He hopes he's right.

…

He loses it one night and feels like shit about it.

It's been a really bad few days at work- too many hours, bitchy clients, and his boss is being a total douche. On top of that, things are really stressful at home, too. It turns out that Ethan loves preschool, so that's awesome, but Hunter is having a worse time than ever. He's still not into the idea of his sister existing, and he's having major separation anxiety now that Ethan's going to school almost every day. He starts acting out all the time, yelling, throwing fits, whatever he can do to get attention.

And when they're getting ready for dinner one night, Hunter decides to act like a nut. Sam goes into the living room to get the kids, and Hunter's in there pushing Riley's swing, making it go much faster than it needs to. Sam tells him to stop and isn't too gentle about it because he's already had to get onto him for the same thing like three times in the past week. Hunter does stop, but not before he throws in a stuck out tongue and one more push just to see if he can get away with it.

He can't.

Before Sam even has time to think about it, he grabs Hunter by the elbow, yanks him over a little too roughly, and swats him a few times. The tears are actually delayed and don't start until like five seconds after Sam lets him go. He ignores him and tells him to go to the table, and Hunter does, crying the whole way while Ethan runs after him.

Sam feels like shit. Like literally awful. It's not that he's against spanking his kids or whatever. He has before, and he'll do it when he needs to, but it's not something that happens all the time or anything. And he never just like loses his temper and does it like that or anything. _That's _what he's against, and he's always been really careful to never let it happen like that. He got spanked a lot when he was growing up, a lot more than any of his kids ever have, but he honestly doesn't remember anybody ever just losing their temper and hitting him. It used to drive him crazy, honestly, because he always got sent to his room and had to wait for however long if he was in trouble. At the time, he thought it was his parents just trying to torture him or something, but now he realizes it was just to give everybody time to calm down.

So that's how he tries to do it, too.

And normally it works. He rarely loses his temper on his kids, and if he feels like he's about to snap, he tries to just walk away from the situation for a little while. It was harder when he was by himself and didn't have any help. Jake was normally a pretty good kid, but he knew how to push buttons and went all out for it sometimes. Sam was way more stressed out, too, despite the fact that he only had one kid versus the four he has now. It was just a lot harder, trying to do everything on his own- bills were much harder to pay back then, and he always felt like he was getting pulled in a million different directions at any given time. So when Jake would get on a defiant kick, it was a lot harder to be patient- especially since it's more difficult to just walk away from a situation if you don't have anybody else there to watch your kid in the meantime. So he had to learn to control his temper and keep himself calm, even when his son was in badass mode.

And seriously, if he can refrain from smacking the shit out of Jake these days when his attitude is off the charts and he purposely goes out of his way to be disrespectful, then it's pretty crappy that he lost his temper and snapped on a two year old. So yeah, he feels pretty bad.

He gets Riley out of her swing and carries her into the kitchen. Hunter's in his booster, still crying, and Sam knows it's because his feelings are hurt way more than his butt, since he seriously barely touched him. But it still makes him feel bad. Ethan's tailing Quinn around the kitchen, tattling and spilling the whole story. She tells him to go sit down right as Sam passes Riley over to her and turns around to leave again. His actual intention is to go get Jake, but he really just doesn't want to sit there listening to Hunter cry and know that he's the reason.

It doesn't work, though, because Quinn follows him back into the living room and asks him what's going on.

"I'm sure Ethan told you everything."

"What happened?" Riley starts whimpering, so she adjusts her position and moves her up so that she can rub her back.

"Hunter was pushing that damn swing, and I told him to stop. And he didn't, so I spanked him."

"So?" She doesn't seem nearly as concerned about it as he is.

"So I just lost my temper and snapped on him."

"You already told him to stop. He didn't listen." She shrugs like it's no big deal. "And I told him not to do it like four times yesterday."

"I don't like losing my temper with the kids."

Quinn just kind of smiles and shakes her head a little bit. "I lose my temper with them twenty times a day. You're way more patient than I am." He doesn't say anything because that doesn't really make him feel better. Quinn might lose her temper, but the most she ever does is yell and send them to time out. "You didn't do anything wrong, Sam. Seriously, don't worry about it."

"Now Hunter's crying."

"So he's dramatic." She shrugs again. "I'm sure he got that from you." Sam laughs, and Quinn just smiles. "Trust me," she says seriously. "You have no idea how lucky our kids are. You're like the best dad in the world."

He likes hearing her say things like that. It means a lot, seriously. He worries about stuff a lot, like if he's screwing up and that kind of stuff, so hearing Quinn say he's okay makes him feel better.

He also likes the way she kisses him after that, carefully moving Riley so that she doesn't get smushed. She balances her in one arm and uses her free hand to pull him toward her by the back of the head. He kisses her back, too, until he feels a hand wrap around his elbow and pull him away.

Jake shows up just in time to tell them they're gross and roll his eyes. He also takes the baby from Quinn and covers her eyes so that she doesn't have to witness her parents being disgusting or whatever it is they're doing. Good thing she won't end up mentally and emotionally scarred or something.

But it's kind of nice when he takes Riley back into the kitchen because it gives them a little more time to get back to the kissing thing. And these days, they pretty much take what they can get.

…

A/N: Thanks for all the reviews on the last chapter. Hope you liked this one!


	18. Chapter 18

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 18**

…

When he first met Quinn, he was fifteen, socially awkward, a new kid nobody, and trying to play a game way out of his league.

She was older, popular, head cheerleader, and legitimately the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen in real life. So he really has no clue what gave him the idea that he should go after her because on paper, he was pretty much a lost cause. But he must have been either super ballsy or super dumb because he went for it and was somehow successful. He's still not sure how it happened, but it did.

It was weird, though, with him being the new kid or whatever, because Quinn had a pretty epic year the year before that. He heard about it pretty much right away, before he'd even spoken to her actually. McKinley wasn't that big, so the Cheerios captain having a baby and giving it up for adoption was still kind of big news, even months after it happened. So he knew about that. And he knew that she was somehow Queen Bee again and, apparently, not exactly the nicest person in the world. He got all of that just from overhearing gossip in the hallways and from this one random dude in his geometry class who liked to talk to him for whatever reason.

So when his first real interaction with her involved her wiping cherry slushie out of his eyes and washing his hair in the locker room sink, he was a little surprised. She didn't seem at all like the mean girl he'd heard about. She just seemed kind of quiet and reserved, and impossibly, she was even prettier up close.

So yeah, that was mostly it at first. She was _so _pretty, and he didn't even think girls like that really existed in real life. Perfect skin, perfect teeth, perfect body, perfect everything. And those freaking eyes that basically trapped him right from the start. She was just… perfect. And all of a sudden, he wanted her more than he'd ever wanted anything in his whole entire life.

He had basically zero experience with girls. Up until that point, the furthest he'd ever gotten with any girl was that time he held hands with Laura Olsen at church camp when he was twelve. That was his last year at camp and basically his last year with girls period, since he started boarding school after that and was one-hundred percent surrounded by nothing but other dudes. So coming to a brand new city and being thrust into public school for the first time since he was like seven… Well, he was kind of clueless.

But somehow he managed to walk into a brand new school and get the head cheerleader to go out with him. It was crazy, and he knew it then and knows it now.

Quinn was his first real girlfriend… his first kiss… and he's pretty sure he would have given just about anything in the world to make her his first _everything, _but that never happened. He didn't see her naked until he was like twenty-seven, so when he was fifteen, he had to settle for all that bare leg that the Cheerios uniform offered because he wasn't getting an inch more than that.

But whatever, he remembers it pretty clearly.

He remembers wanting this pretty girl to like him and trying like super desperately not to make himself look like a dumbass. He remembers spending like every conceivable second thinking about her and not realizing that it was kind of stalkerish… And he remembers being totally freaking clueless about basically everything.

So that's why he does his absolute best not to freak out when Jake asks him how you're supposed to know when a girl wants you to kiss her.

There are two ways he could react- he could jump the gun and tell Jake he's too young to be kissing girls or doing anything else related to that… or he could just be cool about it and try honesty. He thinks about what his own dad would have done and remembers the unrealistic abstinence only sex talk he got, and that's one thing he actually thinks his dad did wrong. And not that he thinks Jake is getting ready to have sex or anything close to that, but he _is _almost a teenager, so maybe this is kind of the opening he's been looking for.

So he goes the calm route.

"_Have _you kissed a girl before?" Maybe it's not his business, but… yeah, he thinks it's his business, so what?

Jake shakes his head, though, and, surprisingly, only seems mildly uncomfortable. They're alone- everybody else is asleep, and Jake's finally finished his homework and come into the living room where Sam's watching a rerun of some stupid crime show that he's not actually paying attention to. Sam should have known something was up by the way Jake seated himself on the opposite end of the couch and kind of just sat there for a few minutes until he obviously decided to ask his question. Sam's a little bit surprised, but glad, that Jake is actually willing to answer.

"You don't always know when a girl wants you to kiss her." Sam knows firsthand what it feels like to be shot down mid-go… "You just have to figure out if she really likes you."

Jake asks how you're supposed to know that, and Sam tries and fails to think of a valid answer. So he just goes with, "She wants to be around you all the time. And she talks to you all the time. And if she smiles a lot around you, that's a good sign." It sounds completely lame, but it's kind of true. He doesn't know how to put into words all the hints that a girl is interested- you just have to feel it.

Jake just thinks that over for a few seconds, and then Sam's shocked when he's super straight forward and just admits that he likes Kaley. A lot. The revelation in itself is not shocking, but the fact that Jake is willing to readily admit to it is, and that's kind of a clear-cut sign that he's more teenager than kid now.

"Do you think she likes you back?"

And he gets another shrug before Jake says she sits with him all the time at school. And sometimes she picks him instead of Michelle if they have to have partners for something. But then Jake frowns, and Sam can tell he's more confused than anything.

"I think she probably likes you." He makes it simple for the kid. "But she might not be ready to kiss you. You shouldn't make her feel bad if she doesn't feel ready yet."

Jake says that he won't make her feel bad, and Sam's kind of surprised with the level of maturity he seems to have about the whole thing.

"You have to be nice to girls. And like really respect them. You might want to do things that they don't want to do, and it's really important that you don't pressure them or push them to think they have to." He feels like he's talking in circles, and he doesn't even know if Jake's understanding. "Does that make sense?"

And Jake just stares at him for several long seconds and then flat out asks him if he's talking about sex.

Sam's shocked. He didn't think he was being that obvious, and he's even more shocked that Jake is so forward and upfront about it, but maybe that's a good thing. Maybe it'll make everything way easier if Jake's not afraid to talk about things like that.

So he nods and swallows just a little bit. "Yeah. And other stuff. But yeah…"

And Jake just says he already knows about sex. Apparently they watched a movie in school, and he's an expert or something. Sam's not too sure about that because he can't really imagine what kind of sex education movie a private Catholic school would choose to show, but whatever. He probably _does _know most of the basics. But that's not even what's important, it's about way more than just the technical side.

"Well, some day- in the future," he's careful to clarify, "you'll be ready for that. And you just have to make sure that whoever you're with is ready, too." Sam cringes inside his head, thinking he sounds like some kind of Lifetime movie or something, but seriously. What else is he supposed to say? This is the truth. "It's a big deal, you know? And if you're not careful, it could really change your whole life."

And Jake wants to flat-out know if he's talking about him.

"Well, yeah. I wasn't ready to be a dad. I mean, I didn't know anything about babies, and I didn't have any money. And there's lots of stuff I wish you'd had when you were little that I couldn't make happen."

Jake kind of looks away for a few seconds, like he's thinking or something, and then he looks back over and asks Sam if he regrets it.

Sam shakes his head. "No, never," and that's the truth. "But it did change my whole life. I didn't get to finish college or like get to take time and decide what I wanted to do. I just had to get a job and make money, and I had to spend all my time taking care of a baby when I wasn't used to that at all. It was really hard sometimes." Jake just kind of nods, and Sam's surprised at how easy it is to talk about all this stuff, especially since he's been dreading it for awhile now. "I don't regret it at all, but it's a lot easier to take care of a baby when you're older and have a real job. Your brothers and sister have a lot more than you did when you were their age."

But Jake actually smiles and shrugs, and then he just says it was fun when he was little. That makes Sam feel really good because it is something he sometimes feels guilty about.

"You should just think about that stuff, though, when you get to that point where you think you might be ready to do something like that. Just know what can happen and be careful, okay?"

Jake doesn't seem uncomfortable at all, which is amazing. This kind of talk isn't supposed to be this easy, so Sam's super glad he got one of the awesome kids who doesn't make it a million times worse. Jake does want to know, though, how you're supposed to know when you're ready for something like that, and Sam just shrugs.

"That's up to you. You just have to decide that for yourself. You need to be old enough to deal with all the stuff that comes with it, and you should be with somebody you really care about." He knows he's edging back to the Lifetime side, but he's going to say everything he's got to say while he's actually got his kid's attention. "I'm not going to tell you not to do it because you're going to eventually regardless. I just want you to know that when you _are _ready for it that you can talk to me. Like if you have any questions or just want to talk. I'm not gonna ever like judge you or anything, okay?" Jake nods again. "And not just about that, but about anything, okay? A lot of stuff is going to change as you get older, and if you have questions, just ask. Or even if you just want to talk, I'll listen, okay? I know there's stuff you want to keep private, but just don't be afraid to talk to me if you need to."

Jake nods, and then says okay, but all he wants to do right now is kiss.

Sam smiles and nods. "Okay. But like I said, if she doesn't want to, don't make her feel bad about it."

Maybe all this teenage stuff won't be as bad as he feared.

…

Quinn goes back to work the next morning.

Riley's eight weeks old, and the doctor said she's fine to go back whenever she wants to. Quinn jumps at that because she's never really been the stay-at-home type. She's eager to get back to her job and to start working again.

She wakes up early to get ready, and Sam gets up with her so that he can get Ethan and Jake up and ready, too. He wakes Jake up first, knowing he'll have to go back at least two more times before he actually gets out of bed, and then he goes to the boys' room and gets Ethan up. That's easier, but he still has to physically lift him out of bed and carry him to the bathroom so that he doesn't just wet his pants or pee in the floor or something. And when he sits him on the counter so that he can wash his face and comb his hair, Ethan practically falls right back to sleep. He gets him to the breakfast table, though, and then doubles back to make another attempt at Jake. It takes shaking him for two full minutes before he finally gets pissed off enough to actually get up and get in the shower.

Sam runs into Hunter on his way back to the kitchen. Apparently he's up on his own and wandering the hallways even though he was still asleep a few minutes ago when Sam was in there. He grabs him and carries him back to his bedroom because if there's one thing Hunter's good for, it's a wet diaper in the morning. Sam really can't wait til he's potty trained… Hunter's more awake than either of his brothers, though, and he starts jabbering away mindlessly while Sam gets him changed and gets his pajamas pulled back up. He doesn't have to actually get him dressed or anything yet because he doesn't have anywhere to be.

Sam sends him to the kitchen with Ethan, and he hands them each a banana to get them started and goes back to his own room. Quinn's out of the shower and drying her hair in the bathroom. She smiles at him in the mirror when he leans against the doorframe to watch. She turns the blow dryer off after a little while and sets it on the counter so that she can comb her hair out some.

"Are the kids up?"

"Everybody but Riley, she's still asleep. Hopefully she stays that way."

"Hmm… Don't bet on it." She pumps some kind of product into her hand and starts working it through her damp hair. "But maybe we can sneak out before she wakes up."

That's what he's planning on. "Hey," he gets her attention, and she turns around to look at him. "I talked to Jake last night. Like _the _talk."

Quinn stops what she's doing and raises her eyebrows. "And?"

"And he was really cool. Like he didn't freak out or anything. It was good."

"Did you tell him why he's not allowed to have girls in his bedroom?"

Sam rolls his eyes. She still won't let that go. "Not specifically, no. I told him we trust him to make good decisions."

"Was he embarrassed?"

"Not really. He said he wants to kiss Kaley."

"Oh, my god." Quinn seems like she's having real issues with this or something, but he tries to make it sound less serious.

"I know. But they're in seventh grade. I guess that's pretty normal, isn't it?"

"I just don't know when he like… grew up." She shakes her head. "Everything's going too fast."

He agrees with that. He wants Jake to be that little seven year old kid who loved building stuff with Legos and playing video games about pirates. This teenager who wants to text all the time and thinks kissing girls would be fun is kind of scary. But it's happening. They can't stop it, so they need to learn to live with it.

Sam leaves her to finish getting ready, and he goes back to the kitchen so that he can actually make breakfast. Hunter has eaten his whole banana and half of Ethan's, but Ethan is whining that he wants oatmeal, so Sam dumps some into a pot and puts it on the stove. He's glad that his kids like a lot of healthier stuff because that's what they try to feed them most of the time. But just like any kid, Ethan wants his oatmeal with something sweet, so Sam pours a little bit of maple syrup into it and lets it cook for a few minutes before he scoops some into a bowl and sets it aside to let it cool.

"Do you want some?" he asks Hunter, but Hunter just shakes his head and polishes off the rest of the second banana. Whatever makes him happy.

Jake comes out then, dressed and asking for bacon. Sam gives him the rest of the oatmeal instead because there's not enough time to cook each of the kids their own special breakfast. He expects an argument, but Jake honestly seems too tired to care. But one good thing has come out of Jake's sudden interest in girls- it's really improved his grooming habits. It's like he suddenly sees a purpose in showering and wearing deodorant and that kind of stuff, and he's taking much better care of his clothes, too. He's actually totally put together by the time he makes it to breakfast- shirt tucked in, belt on, both shoes, collar smoothed. His hair's still wet, but it's curly enough that air drying it doesn't matter. But overall, he's starting to really step it up in that whole department, and it doesn't really seem like a coincidence that it happens the same year he gets his first real crush.

Hunter's on his third banana by the time Quinn's finally finished getting ready, and she looks weirdly nervous when she comes into the kitchen. Maybe she's just been out of work long enough to be uneasy about going back, but he knows she's excited. She likes her job and likes working, and he knows she's happy to just be out of this house finally.

Ethan smiles over his oatmeal when Quinn passes him some juice and says, "Momma, you look so pretty," in this totally sincere and innocent way that only a kid can pull off. The look on her face is amazing, though, and that compliment probably means more than just about any other one she could get.

Sam, on the other hand, is just impressed with the fact that his son already knows flattery can and will get you everywhere with women, so he winks at him and flashes him a quick thumbs up behind Quinn's back to show his approval. Quinn sees him, though, and turns around to narrow her eyes at him like she's suspicious or something.

"What?" he says innocently. "He's totally right. I agree with him a hundred percent."

She rolls her eyes and grabs the last banana of the bunch for herself, but he catches that tiny little smile she lets slip against her own will.

…

He sends her flowers- yellow tulips because they're her favorite.

He just does it because he knows her first day at work might be kind of hectic, and maybe she's feeling kind of overwhelmed trying to get back in the swing of things. Not to mention the fact that she's kind of done a lot for him, like having his kids and all that, so it's nice to show a little appreciation. Plus, he just loves her. Like a lot.

His phone buzzes while he's timing a client's laps, and it's just a text that says, _"I love you," _and that's it. He smiles to himself, but he doesn't need to reply.

And by the time they both get home that night, he's pretty sure he's done something really super right because she's all smiles, and when he asks her how her day was, she doesn't even mention any of the numerous bitches she works with or anything. She just says, "It was great," and sounds like she actually means it.

They actually have a really good night, too. The kids are good, they don't fight or whine too much. Dinner is easy, and everybody actually eats it. Nobody fights bedtime, Jake goes off to do his homework, and Riley just takes a bottle and falls right to sleep. It's all kind of awesome.

They're cleaning up the kitchen when she asks him what his motive is. "So what did you do? And are tulips enough to make up for it?"

He shakes his head. "I didn't do anything actually. I just thought you deserved something pretty."

"And your face wasn't enough?"

"Well, obviously." He smiles. "But you can't really take it to work and set it on your desk or anything."

Quinn purses her lips a little bit like she's trying to think of a good comeback, but she comes up short.

"Besides," he adds, just for good measure, "those flowers might be pretty, but nothing compared to you."

She blinks at him. "Keep talking. You might get lucky tonight."

"I'm lucky every night."

And then she punches him in his arm. "Jerk. Shut up and stop making me like you."

"Am I still a jerk if I mean every single word?"

Quinn just twists her lips and shakes her head. "You're a jerk because you could be saying anything in the world right now, and you'd still have that damn face."

"Yeah, it's kind of a curse."

"I hate you."

He smirks and moves til he's got her trapped between his body and the counter. He puts one arm on each side of her and blocks her in. "Yeah… But I really think you love me."

She looks down and undoes a couple of buttons at the bottom of his shirt. "I love you better with less of this," and then she tugs on the hem for good measure.

"Well, you're in luck then because I'm pretty good at taking my shirt off. I have a lot of practice."

"You better not be taking it off anywhere but inside my bedroom."

"I work at a gym."

"And? You better be fully clothed. Leave something to those little girls' imagination."

"How about we go to bed and use _our _imaginations?"

She laughs and shakes her head. "You're ridiculous."

He ignores her and kisses her nose instead. "I'm glad your day was good."

"You made it better."

"So… let me make it even more better right now…"

"More better is not even remotely correct."

But he just shrugs and bumps his forehead against hers. "You never claimed to like me for my brain."

…

One of the things he loves best about being a dad is watching his kids just be so sweet and innocent.

They grow out of it fast, so he likes knowing that there's still that total innocence to them when they're little. When kids are three or four, they kind of say the most amazing stuff in the world, so he wants to pay attention to all of it.

He finds Ethan alone in his bedroom one day, just sitting on the floor by himself and pushing a car around in a circle. That in itself is not unusual at all, but Ethan's talking to himself, mumbling a bunch of stuff before he even looks up and sees Sam watching him.

"Who're you talking to?" Sam moves into the room and goes over to where Ethan is. He doesn't really expect an answer, just kind of wants to hang out with his son for a little while.

But Ethan answers and says, "Jesus," and Sam immediately wants to just hug him or something.

Instead, he sits down beside him and picks up another car, spinning its wheels carefully. "Oh, yeah?"

Ethan nods. "Yeah, but he's not saying nothing back."

Sam smiles a little. "Well, he's really busy, so he can't always talk back. But he can always hear you."

Ethan thinks that over for a couple of seconds and says, "He's like Jake. Jake doesn't talk, either."

"Well, kind of…" Sam's unsure if he should be encouraging his kid to think of his brother as an equivalent to Jesus, but if it helps him understand…

"But Jake can't hear me, either." Ethan seems more confused now, so Sam just lifts a shoulder.

"He can't _hear, _but he always knows what you're saying, doesn't he?"

Ethan nods and chews on his lip a little. "So I can talk to Jesus with my hands, too?"

"If you want to. You can talk to him however you want. You can even just talk to him in your head."

"I wish I could hear people's heads."

Sam laughs and nods. "Yeah, that'd be pretty cool."

"Sissy could talk to me!"

"Yeah, she could." Sam's kind of impressed with that. He bumps his car against Ethan's and asks, "How's preschool?"

"Fun. I say all my months now."

"Yeah?"

Ethan nods quickly and then starts spouting them off. "January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, November, December!"

"That's great!" Sam high fives him, and Ethan smacks his hand happily. "You missed one, though."

He looks confused then and starts over. "January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, November, December."

"September, _October, _November, December."

"That doesn't go as good." Ethan looks offended by the addition of October, and Sam laughs because he's kind of right. He never realized it before, but there's a nice little rhyme going between September, November, December. October kind of throws it off.

"October is Halloween, though. Trick or Treating."

Ethan's eyes brighten at that, and it's obvious that the promise of free candy trumps a messed up mini-rhyme.

"It's October right now," Sam tells him. "Halloween is soon."

And Ethan seems _totally _fine after that.

…

A/N: A little bit shorter, but not so much of a wait. Thanks for reading!


	19. Chapter 19

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 19**

…

He has a late client on Tuesday, so when he gets home it's already almost dinner-time. He's surprised when he pulls up to the house to see his sister's car parked in the driveway, mostly because he had no idea she was in town and definitely didn't know she was coming to his house. It's definitely out of the ordinary, but she doesn't live _that _far away, so maybe she just had a couple of days off work and decided to make a random trip home or something. She does that sometimes, so he doesn't really think too much of it.

He grabs his bag out of the backseat and almost trips over a tricycle that's parked in front of the garage. He pushes it back to its normal spot in the garage and picks up a random pair of toddler-sized tennis shoes that are sitting by the stairs. When he gets in the house, he almost immediately gets hit by a remote control monster truck that comes zooming straight by his feet, and Ethan laughs like it's the funniest thing in the world when Sam literally jumps out of the way.

"Stacy's here!" he announces, and Sam kicks the truck a little bit to turn it around from the corner it's crashed into.

"Are these yours?" he holds up the shoes, and Ethan looks at them and thinks for a second before nodding. "Why are they outside?"

"I dunno," Ethan shrugs like he has no clue and goes right back into his mission of driving the truck all over the hallway. Sam just sighs a little bit and drops the shoes into the basket by the door before edging his way past his son and moving toward the kitchen.

Quinn's in there making a salad, and Stacy's at the table giving Riley a bottle. They both look up when he gets there, and Stacy smiles like it's not totally random for her to be sitting in his kitchen.

"What're you doing here?" He drops his bag into one of the chairs and grabs a bottle of water out of the fridge.

"Just visiting." Stacy shrugs and looks back down at Riley who's wide awake and obviously very pleased to be eating judging by the way she's sucking away at the bottle like it's the best thing she's ever tasted. Considering the fact that it's the _only _thing she's ever tasted, that's not so far off.

"When'd you get here?"

"Just a couple of hours ago. I haven't been home yet."

That's weird. She apparently left Louisville and drove straight to his house instead of stopping at his parents? He's not really sure what's up with that, but he doesn't get a chance to ask because Quinn jumps in and throws him a bag of dinner rolls.

"Can you get these in the oven? I think the kids are about to starve."

He doesn't even know where the kids are, minus the one currently being held by his sister an the one denting the living room walls with a remote control truck, but whatever.

…

He finds out later exactly why Stacy hasn't been home yet, and he's not totally thrilled by it.

After dinner, he gets the little kids ready for bed while Quinn takes care of Riley and Stacy helps Jake with his math homework. It's almost ten when Jake finally goes to his room, and by that point, Stacy's got Riley again and is holding her against her shoulder, rubbing her back and kissing the side of her head.

"Are you spending the night here?" Sam squeezes himself between Quinn and the armrest of the sofa on the opposite end from his sister. Quinn pulls her feet up to the sofa and leans back against Sam who puts an arm around her waist so that they can settle more comfortably.

Stacy moves, too, turning around so that her back's against the other armrest so that she's facing them. She moves Riley from her shoulder down to her knees and holds her there instead. "No, I need to go back home tonight." Sam's just about to tell her to hurry up because he knows his parents are going to be pissed if she randomly shows up at midnight, but then she says, "I have to work tomorrow," and he realizes she's not talking about _that _home.

"You're driving back to Louisville tonight?"

She nods and then smiles down at the baby who is obviously making some kind of face that amuses her. "Yeah, I have to be at work by eleven."

"So you just drove up here for dinner?" He's confused because he has no idea why she would do that.

"Well, I wanted to talk to you." She sounds kind of nervous or something, which obviously doesn't bode well for anything because something is clearly up. And whatever it is is obviously something he's probably not going to like, judging by the way her voice sounds right now. "But like, you can't get pissed off and yell at me, okay?"

Well, _this _should be fun. He just looks at her, and he feels Quinn shift a little bit, but when he looks at her, she's just running her fingers over the top of the baby's head from her spot between him and Stacy.

"What's wrong?" he asks, and then point blankly says, "Are you pregnant?" because he seriously cannot imagine any other reason why she would be sitting there looking nervous and telling him not to yell at her.

But he's wrong. Stacy shakes her head. "No." There're a few seconds of silence, and then she bites her lip and sighs. "But I'm married."

He just looks at her and kind of purses his lips a little. He's not really sure what he's supposed to say that. He's not really sure if that's better or worse than being pregnant. After all, at least if she was pregnant, he could accept that she just made a mistake or that it was an accident or something. But her getting married means that she actively _chose _to make a decision that's going to alter her whole life when she's barely old enough to even drink legally.

Stacy's just watching him for his reaction. Quinn doesn't seem surprised, so it's safe to assume that she already had this news dropped on her beforehand. He's not too sure how he feels about that, either.

"Say something." Stacy blinks at him, and Sam lets out another sigh.

"What do you want me to say? I think it's pretty dumb."

"I'm an adult," she protests immediately, and he can totally tell she's been rehearsing this whole scene in her mind or something because she's obviously got all her defense selling points on hand.

"Yeah, barely."

"I'm twenty-two."

"Yeah, I know. I was there when you were born."

"I'm not a kid."

He wants to point out that if all her defense points have to do with the fact that the United States government deems her an adult then she's not doing a very good job. But it's not worth it. Instead, he just says, "Okay. You're an adult. So what does it matter what I think?"

"Because I want you to support me!" She doesn't really raise her voice, but it's enough of a change to make Riley jump a little bit, and Quinn reaches over to take her.

"I don't think you realize what a big deal this is." He tries to keep his voice really calm because getting angry isn't going to help anything, and all it's gonna do is make Stacy more defensive.

"I'm not stupid, Sam. And Tyler and I have been together for a long time. It's not like I just met some random guy and married him two weeks later."

"I just don't understand why you need to make this huge decision _right now. _You haven't even found a real job yet." He's not being mean, but she's got a bachelor's degree and is still making coffee at Starbucks. It's just the truth. "Why do you need to rush things?"

"We didn't rush anything. We waited til we got out of school, and we're old enough… What's the point in waiting when I know this is what I want?"

He's not going to make her change her mind. She's not a little kid, she's old enough to make her own decisions. He just wishes she would wait a little while, just wait until she's older and at least has a better job or something. Getting married doesn't make you a grown up, and he's pretty sure she thinks it does. Tyler hasn't found a job, either, and he's still working at the mall. They're still really young, whether either of them wants to believe it or not.

"Stacy…" He stops himself and shakes his head. "I don't know what you want me to say."

"I want you to say that you're _happy _for me. And that you _love _me because I'm your sister, and you're supposed to support me no matter what."

"Of course I love you." He rolls his eyes because, what even? "But I just don't understand why you would make such a huge decision that's going to like change your whole life when you're just barely out of college? Why couldn't you just wait a few years and make sure this is what you want?"

"Because I love him. And I know I want to be married to him. Whether that happens now or in ten years, nothing's going to change." She sounds so ridiculously idealistic that it's kind of difficult not to let it show on his face.

What is the point, though? She's already done it. He's not going to make her see anything any differently. So whatever. "When did this happen?"

Stacy frowns a little bit, like she doesn't want to answer. "The end of August."

"So almost two months ago?" She nods, and he can tell she's worried about his reaction to that. "You've been married for almost two months, and you're just now telling us?"

"Nobody knows," she says immediately. "Not our friends or anything. Just Stevie. And now you guys."

"And how long has Stevie known?"

Stacy picks at a loose string on the back of the couch instead of making eye contact. "Well, he was there."

Sam sighs for what feels like the millionth time pushes a hand through his hair. Quinn looks at him, and he just shakes his head. So not only has his sister been secretly married for two months, but his brother has also known about it the whole time and not bothered to say anything.

"You realize Mom is going to kill you, right?"

Stacy looks up then, and he can tell she's confused. "_Mom?"_

"Yeah. Not only did you cheat her out of planning your wedding, but you didn't even bother to call and tell her you were getting married. You don't think that's going to hurt the hell out of her?"

She looks guilty, and he knows she hasn't really thought about that before. She's been concerned with _anger, _not with the fact that people are going to be _hurt. _"I didn't tell _anyone."_

"That doesn't make it any better, Stacy. And Dad…"

"I know Dad's going to be mad. That's why I was hoping…" She frowns again and kind of glances at Quinn for a quick second. "I was hoping you could talk to him."

He actually laughs because she's _crazy. _"I am not telling Dad you decided to run off and get married without telling anyone and that you _and _Stevie have been keeping it a secret for two months."

"I'm going to tell him. I just was hoping you could like _talk _to him and make him try to understand. He listens to you, he doesn't listen to me or Steve."

"What exactly am I supposed to make him understand? _I _don't even understand, Stacy. I don't know why you would do this, much less why you'd do it in secret! Shouldn't you _want _your family around for what's supposed to be like the biggest moment of your life?"

Quinn butts in then, probably because she thinks Sam is overreacting or something, but he doesn't really feel like he is. He thinks it's perfectly within his right to feel bothered by the fact that his little sister not only made a dumb decision, but also that she _got married _and didn't even invite her own family. "You need to tell your parents," she tells Stacy. "And you need to just be honest and upfront, but tell them soon. The longer you wait, the worse it's going to seem."

Stacy still looks a little guilty, like she knows it's the truth but was hoping they'd tell her something different, and she nods a little bit because she obviously knows they're right. "Just don't be mad at me," she says quietly, and she looks right at Sam with some kind of pleading look or something. It makes her look about eight, and that just makes it worse.

"Stace…" He lets his voice trail off and then puts his elbow on the back of the couch so that he can rest his head in his hand. He's really tired, and this is going nowhere. "I just wish you wouldn't wish this part of your life away so fast. You're so young…" He can tell she's about to protest once again that she's an adult, but he doesn't give her the chance. "This is supposed to be the best part of your life, and I didn't get to enjoy it. I Just want you to get that chance."

"I _am _enjoying it. I'm _happy. _Sam, this is what I want." She sounds so earnest and like sincere or something, but it still bothers him. She should be having the time of her life right now, hanging out with her friends and wasting her money on stupid stuff while she still has an excuse. She shouldn't be going home to a _husband _every night and having to worry about crap like filing joint tax returns.

He just wants her to be happy. At the end of the day, that's all he's ever wanted. So if she's happy, he's at least glad for that, but he just doesn't want her missing out on any life experiences. He missed out on way too many, and he wants to make sure she doesn't have to deal with that. It's like when she was six years old, and they were living in a roach motel… She probably barely remembers that, but he remembers it super well. And he remembers feeling like he was being forced to grow up overnight and trying anything in his power to make sure his brother and sister didn't feel the same way. He tried _so hard _to make sure they still just felt like normal kids and never realized how bad it really was. One of the worst feelings he ever remembers having happened one day when he was babysitting and Stacy woke up from a nap crying because she was hungry, and the only thing he had to give her was some taffy he was supposed to be selling for glee club. And then he had to lie to Mr. Schue and say it got stolen out of his locker in gym because he couldn't even afford to pay for it. He felt so guilty after that, and he remembers praying so hard for forgiveness because he'd basically stolen that stuff, and stealing was supposed to send you to hell. Not to mention lying about it. He knows now that God wouldn't have sent him to hell for a $10 box of candy, but he was fifteen then, and he didn't know anything besides what was preached at him in church- don't lie, don't steal, don't kill, obey your mother and father, don't covet your neighbor's wife.

Obviously this is not the same thing or even close. Whether he likes it or not, Stacy is right in claiming she's an adult. But he's just worried about her not getting everything out of life that she possibly can. She's young and pretty and smart, and he just doesn't think she should be making life-changing decisions when she still has _so much _life in front of her.

But it's not his decision.

"Just tell Mom and Dad," he says, pushing Quinn forward a little bit so he can stand up. "Don't keep lying to them. And it's too late for you to drive back tonight, so just stay here and leave in the morning."

He goes to the laundry room and gets her a pillow and a blanket and throws some of Quinn's pajamas at her. She catches it and just looks at him, obviously trying to see if he's mad at her or something. He's not mad. He's just worried.

Hopefully she has her head on straight, and he just has to trust her.

…

Quinn corners him about it the next morning.

He's brushing his teeth, about to get in the shower, when she comes in and plants herself on the counter. They didn't really get much time to talk about it the night before because she stayed up with Stacy while he went to bed. And when he woke up this morning, Stacy was already folding up blankets and getting ready to leave, which getting out before the kids woke up was probably a really good idea. But Stacy's gone now, and Quinn obviously feels like they should talk about it.

"You know she's right," she says calmly. "She's not a kid. And she's in love."

"So why does she have to rush stuff? If she's in love, she'll still be in love when she's twenty-five or twenty-six."

"She's not rushing anything. She's been dating the same guy since she was nineteen."

"I know that." He puts his toothbrush back in the holder and looks at her. "But it still sucks that she couldn't even tell us before she did something like that. My mom is going to be devastated for real."

Quinn looks like she believes that. She knows how easily his mom gets her feelings hurt, and realizing that her only daughter didn't care enough to let her be there when she got married is going to kill her. "Well, maybe Stacy's right. Maybe you could talk to them about it and help them realize she didn't do it to intentionally hurt anyone."

"But I don't know _why _she did it." And he's serious. "How am I supposed to help them understand when I don't even understand myself?"

His family is very close and always has been. He can't imagine ever wanting to do something as huge as getting married without involving them. He didn't have a huge wedding, either, but he at least made sure that all the people he loved were there. He would never take that away from his parents- seeing your kids get married should be a huge fucking deal. He doesn't even know what he'd do if any of _his _kids got married and didn't bother to tell him. That would hurt like hell.

"Well, talk to Stacy some more. Try to understand. She really wants you to support her."

"I've always supported her," and that's not a lie. "I've _always_ wanted her to have everything she could get. But I just don't get this."

"Just try, okay?" And Quinn's looking at him like she's caught in the middle of something.

She probably is.

…

Halloween comes up fast, and he finds himself at Target with Quinn digging through a mess of costumes that are in no particular order and that have clearly already been picked through.

They're looking for a dinosaur costume and some kind of train costume, since those are the only answers they got out of their kids when they asked them what they wanted to be. So far, they aren't having any kind of luck because apparently the people who _didn't _wait until October 30th to buy their kids' costumes have already taken all the dinosaur and train-related outfits. As well as all the other outfits, too.

"Let's just dress them up like zombies and let them go." Sam drops a slutty nurse's outfit into the huge pile of stuff he's already dug through. "We can just rip their clothes up and buy some makeup."

"Yeah, and then Jake can try to kill them, since he's been practicing for the zombie apocalypse for as long as I've known him." Quinn's not wrong- Jake _is _kind of obsessed with zombies and killing zombies via video games…

"Well, what the hell are we going to do? You want to dress your sons up like a hot dog and a princess?" He holds up two costume packages to show her. "Because these are the only toddler-sized costumes I can find."

Quinn sighs, and then finally holds her hand out. "Give me the hot dog."

He drops it into their basket, and then they both go back to work digging through mess of plastic. He's serious when he says _all _the little kids' costumes are gone. There's nothing left but some slutty adult costumes and some even sluttier teen costumes. He's not letting Jake anywhere near any Halloween parties if this is what the girls are going to be wearing. What the hell? Who lets their kid go out in this stuff?

"Hey, look. Batman!" Quinn sounds super triumphant and excited as she holds up a package, but Sam just rolls his eyes.

"That's Spiderman…"

She looks at it again and sees that he's right before shaking her head. "Whatever. This is good, right?"

But Sam squints at it, and just looking at it kind of makes his head hurt. "That's like the worst Spiderman costume I've ever seen…" He takes it from her for a better look. There's nothing authentic about it at all except for the colors, but then he reads the label and sees why. "Oh, this isn't Spiderman. It's _Arachnid Guy."_

Quinn looks exhausted. "Sam…"

"Fine," he gives in, shaking his head. "I guess it's better than a princess…"

They go on a hunt for candy after that. They always have a ton of Trick or Treaters, and Sam refuses to be one of those houses that only gives out shitty stuff or, worse, that turns the porch lights off and pretends not to be home. Halloween is awesome and like the best holiday ever after Christmas, so he's all for being as into it as possible.

When they get home and show off the costumes, there's actually a fight over who gets to be the hot dog, and Sam laughs when Quinn tries to break it up and tell them they can share it and switch costumes in the middle of Trick or Treating.

Poor Arachnid Guy. Gets no love.

…

Jake goes to a Catholic school, so it's kind of ironic that their second biggest fundraiser of the year is a haunted house, but it's been that way for like a million years.

It's one of the best haunted houses in Cincinnati, and it usually ends up making a ton of money. Sam usually ends up working on it one way or another, usually building stuff and putting together props. It's actually a lot of fun and way better than selling tickets at the hot as hell carnival auction in July. He already put in his hours this year and designed an entire torture chamber with enough fake blood to like fill up a swimming pool. But Jake loves the haunted house and asks if he'll take him. Then he wants to know if they can take Kaley and Miles, too, and Sam says okay because it'll probably be fun, too. He also takes Ethan because he begs to go and has never been before. It might turn out being a really bad idea, but he'll try it.

There's a huge gigantic line that wraps all the way around the parking lot even though it's really early, but the lady at the ticket booth is one of the fifth grader's mom and knows Sam pretty well. She says hi to the kids, and they're all polite and say hi back. It's one of the cool things about being at such a small school- everybody knows everybody, and it's nice. She gives them fast path tickets for the price of regular admission, and they get to jump to the front of the line.

He half-expects Jake and his friends to take off without him, but apparently none of them are quite as brave as they'd like to let on because they stick with him pretty closely. Ethan only makes it into the first room before he decides he needs to be carried, and Sam picks him up fast before he has time to get too scared and start whining.

It's kind of awesome, watching the kids get scared and scream and then laugh at themselves. And Ethan even does pretty okay once Sam explains to him that it's all just pretend. He gets scared and spends a lot of time with his face buried in Sam's shoulder and not looking at anything around him, but sometimes he'll look up and get drawn into laughing with the older kids.

When they make it out, Miles just comes straight forward and asks if he can spend the night. Sam doesn't care and says it's fine if his parents say it's okay, and then Jake asks if Kaley can come over, too. Sam gives him a look because no, Kaley cannot come over to spend the night. But Jake must read his mind or something because he's quick to clarify _just to hang out._

So that's how he ends up with six kids in his house on Halloween night. He and Quinn take the little ones out Trick or Treating, with one hot dog, one ghetto knock-off Spiderman, and one little girl in a stroller wearing an orange and black striped dress. They leave Jake and his friends at the house to hand out candy and watch whatever horror movie happens to be on TV, and everything goes really well.

Surprisingly, Ethan forgets that he wanted to wear the hot dog costume part-time and gets way too distracted by the free candy to remember. They go to about a million houses, but somehow neither Ethan nor Hunter get tired. They're having too much fun, and it's cute when Hunter starts saying, "Trick or Treat!" because his Rs sound a lot like Ws, so it's funny. Riley somehow sleeps the whole time, and neither of the other kids try to smother her or complain about her existence even once. So all in all, it's kind of awesome.

See? Halloween is the best.

…

A/N: So, I guess the last chapter was messed up or something. Sorry if you tried to review and didn't get a chance to. Apparently there was some glitch with that or something. Anyway, hopefully the bugs are worked out now, hope you enjoyed it!


	20. Chapter 20

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 20**

…

He's right in the middle of a workout with a new client when one of the front desk girls, Kerry, comes up and tells him he has a phone call.

He just looks at her because, well, he's kind of in the middle of working, and she should know that the last thing they need to be doing is pissing off potential members. Kerry just gives him a kind of apologetic look like she understands that, but she says, "It's your wife," instead of taking the hint.

He's confused- number one, as to why Quinn is calling him in the middle of the day because she's usually too busy to even send a text, and number two, why she is calling the front desk instead of his cell phone. He nods at Kerry and holds up a finger to show her that he'll be there in a second, and then he grabs the attention of one of his friends who is currently involved in his own personal workout and asks him to cover for a second.

He grabs the phone at the front desk and hits the line that Kerry shows him. "Hello?"

"Why the hell aren't you answering your phone?"

Quinn sounds pissed off, which doesn't really bode well for anything. But seriously? "You didn't call me…"

"I've called you like a hundred times!"

"My phone hasn't rung at all." He reaches into his pocket to verify this, but all he grasps is emptiness. "Oh… I think I left my phone in the locker."

"Something's wrong with Jake." She cuts right to it, obviously not in the mood to yell at him anymore.

"What? What's wrong?"

"He fainted at school."

"What? What do you mean fainted?"

"_Fainted, _Sam. Passed out. Jake _fainted _at school."

"But…" He doesn't really know what to say, and everything in his head is just confusion. "What happened to him?"

"I don't know. Apparently he just stood up to like go get something and hit the ground."

"Is he okay?"

"Yeah… I mean, I went and picked him up, and he looks okay, but he's acting weird. I brought him to Children's just so they can check him out and everything."

So Quinn picked Jake up from school, they're at the hospital, and he's standing around at the gym. Not going to happen. "I'll meet you over there. Did he get to see a doctor yet?"

"No, we haven't even been called yet. It's really crowded."

"Okay." He tells himself to be calm because obviously that's the only rational thing to do. "Text me when you go back. I'm on my way."

He tells himself not to freak out because everything's probably fine. Quinn said Jake looks okay, and she wouldn't lie to him. But it's still scary, no matter what. When you hear one of your kids is at the hospital, it's always going to freak you out, right? That's normal. But he tries to be as calm as possible because acting crazy isn't going to help anyone. He lets one of the managers know what's going on, goes back to the client and apologizes, and then he gets his stuff and tries to book it across the city to the hospital.

_Tries _being the keyword.

Turns out there's a major wreck that's blocking traffic and backing things up for several miles. He doesn't know why he's surprised because this is Cincinnati, and there's always traffic whenever you really need to be somewhere, but it still pisses him off. Quinn texts him while he's at a standstill and tells him they're back in an examination room, so at least he knows Jake will see a doctor soon. Of course, he'll probably be done by the time Sam actually makes it to the hospital…

When he finally gets there, the receptionist at emergency tells him where to go, and he finds Jake and Quinn sitting in one of the exam rooms without any kind of doctor or nurse around. Jake looks totally find, just a little paler than usual, but he barely even acknowledges Sam's presence when he shows up.

"Are you okay?" Jake just shrugs one shoulder like he's totally disinterested or something. "What happened?" He gets another shrug, and Jake leans back against the wall and starts picking at a loose string on the knee of his pants.

"The doctor came in for like five minutes, but that's about as far as we've gotten." Quinn seems irritated, and Sam can imagine she probably is. He knows she's probably worried and has been since she picked up the call from the school. She's also obviously still dressed up, since she had to leave work, so he can't imagine sitting around a hospital is the most comfortable thing in the world. It hits him when he looks at her that they probably couldn't look less like they fit together if they tried right now. He's sweaty and in gym clothes, and she's about as put together as it's possible for a person to be.

And he has _no_ idea why any of that is relevant right now.

He tries to ask Jake if he feels sick, but Jake's apparently not really in the mood to like lend the courtesy of making eye contact or anything. He keeps picking at that loose string, and then he starts fidgeting and untucks his shirt. He does all of this without even looking in the direction of the other people in the room, so it's kind of hard to ask him anything. So Sam just asks Quinn instead.

"Did the school say if he was sick or anything?" He sits down on the little rolling stool and looks at Quinn who's sitting in the only extra chair in the room.

"Mrs. Marsden called me." Sam's kind of surprised that the actual principal called instead of like a secretary or the nurse or something. "She told me Jake was with the nurse and that he seemed to be okay but that he'd randomly fainted in his classroom. The teacher said he got up to get the bathroom pass and he only got a few steps before he just passed out. She said he woke up like almost immediately, but obviously it freaked everybody else, so she called the office and had the nurse come get him."

"He hasn't been acting sick." Sam's just confused. "I just don't get it."

"Did you call your mom?" He shakes his head, and Quinn pulls out her own phone. "I'll see if she can pick Ethan up."

Sam listens to one-half of a conversation while Quinn attempts to explain as calmly as possible that Jake "got a little sick at school" and that they're having him checked out. His mom is probably going to be pissed when she finds out that he actually fainted, but there is absolutely zero point in telling her that right now because as badly as Sam wants to freak out… his mom will _freak out. _So it's best if they just don't tell her until they find out what's really wrong. Quinn is better at this than he is, though- he would end up spilling. His mom would say something like how she knows he's not telling the whole truth, and then he would just crack. So it's better if Quinn just talks to her.

In the meantime, Sam _tries _to talk to Jake. He moves over close to him and pushes his foot until Jake has no choice but to pay attention, and then he asks him if he feels sick. Jake says no and then asks if they can go home. Sam tells him they need to wait for the doctor, but Jake just rolls his eyes and says it's not a big deal.

A doctor finally comes back in. Sam assumes it's the same one that was in before because he doesn't bother introducing himself to Quinn. He does introduce himself to Sam, though, and then says he's going to take another look.

Sam gets up from the stool so that the doctor can use it, and he leans against the wall beside Quinn's chair while Dr. Ziegler starts checking Jake out. He feels his neck and takes a look down his throat. Then he looks into his eyes with a flashlight, and Jake can obviously barely stand it from the way he's blinking like crazy.

"He hasn't been sick lately?" Dr. Ziegler spins his stool around to face Sam and Quinn.

"No, he's been fine," Quinn answers, and Sam can tell by the slight annoyance in her tone that she's already answered this question multiple times. "He hasn't complained about anything."

"Has he ever fainted before?"

"No, never."

Dr. Ziegler flips through something in the paperwork, and then looks back up. "Can he read lips?"

Sam nods. "For the most part, yeah."

Dr. Ziegler takes that as his cue and stands up to turn back to Jake. "I want you to tell me if any of this causes any kind of discomfort." He's speaking really slowly, which, surprisingly, makes things more difficult for Jake, so Sam's not surprised when Jake watches him and then looks over in the other direction for a translation. Sam signs to him and tells him what the doctor said, and Jake kind of nods in understanding.

And then the doctor basically presses down on every part of Jake's body, trying to find something that causes pain, but nothing does. Jake just keeps saying nothing hurts, and finally the doctor gives up.

He starts a more basic exam then, checking his throat once more and then moving the light to his ears. Sam notices the look on his face right away, and Dr. Ziegler spends a long time there before he finally moves to the other ear and checks it. It's not long before he's back to the left ear, though, and he takes another look before he actually starts pinching every part of that ear that he can reach and asking Jake if it hurts. And Jake just shakes his head.

"Is he prone to ear infections?" The doctor stops the pinching and looks back at the adults.

Sam shakes his head. "He's had a few… But he doesn't get them all the time or anything."

"When was the last time an audiologist saw him?"

"He went in…" Sam tries to remember. "January?"

"February," Quinn corrects him, and Sam assumes she's right because she generally is.

"How often does he go?"

"He goes every year. Sometimes twice a year."

"He's got a very severe ear infection. His right ear looks a little irritated, but the left one is _extremely _infected. And it appears to be chronic. He hasn't complained about this at all?"

Sam looks at Quinn, and she shakes her head. He hasn't heard Jake mention an earache at all, and obviously Quinn hasn't, either.

"Has he been sick at all? Over the past few months or anything?"

"Not real-" Sam starts to answer, but Quinn cuts him off.

"He had chickenpox. Over the summer."

"Did he see a doctor?"

"No, it wasn't that bad. It only lasted for about a week, and we just sent him to stay with his grandparents until he was better."

Dr. Ziegler writes something down while he says, "Some children do develop ear infections with chickenpox, but it's not very common. Did he have the vaccine?"

Sam answers that one, nodding. "Yeah, he had it when he was a baby."

"Well, he's older than the average chickenpox patient. It's usually worse in older children and adults, but kids who contract it after they've already been vaccinated sometimes see milder cases. I would assume, though, that that's probably when his ear became infected." He scribbles something else into the file. "What concerns me, though, is the fact that he doesn't seem to feel any kind of discomfort related to this infection. With something that severe and longstanding, he should be in extreme pain, and I'm worried that he's somehow actually lost feeling in his ear's nerve endings."

Sam tries to pay attention to what the doctor's saying, but it's a lot being thrown at him at once. He doesn't want to imagine that Jake's ears are going to cause him even more trouble than they already have. His ears have a lot of damage, both physically and auditory-wise, but they've never been numb or anything. He's always been able to _feel _them, so this doesn't make any sense.

"I'm going to send a nurse in to do some bloodwork, just to make sure there's not some other type of infection in his bloodstream or something. I assume his ear infection is just so bad that it's affecting his blood pressure, which is probably what caused him to pass out. But I want to make sure nothing comes up in his blood. So I'll be back."

He leaves then, slipping Jake's file into the basket on the back of the door before he closes it. Sam just looks at Quinn who seems just as confused as he is. He's never heard of an ear infection causing someone to pass out, and he can tell she's kind of thinking the same thing. He especially doesn't understand how that tiny case of chickenpox could have caused all this, especially when Jake barely even seemed sick during it.

He goes to make an attempt at explaining everything to Jake, but he stops when he sees his face. Jake's got this really steely look on his face, like he's trying very hard not to show any kind of reaction or something. Sam knows that look, so he tries not to let it show. Instead, he just starts telling Jake what the doctor said, but he only gets about two sentences in before Jake loses whatever battle he's trying to fight and starts crying.

Quinn immediately gets up and goes over to him so she can put one arm around his shoulders and use her other arm to cradle his head and hug him, and shockingly, he just lets her. Sam doesn't even know what to do with this because Jake _does not _cry, but he's cried more in the past four months than he's cried since he was three years old. Obviously it's because he's got like a million different hormonal changes happening at like any given second or whatever, but Sam still doesn't know what to do with that, so he just lets him be babied for a few minutes before he finally just asks him, "Why are you crying?"

Quinn shoots him kind of a dirty look like he shouldn't be asking that question or something. Or maybe she's just mad because it's what makes Jake finally sit up so that she's not getting to cuddle him and play with his hair anymore or something. But Sam doesn't really pay attention, he just watches while Jake tries to wipe his eyes and make himself stop crying. And then he stares at the floor for a few seconds before he finally looks up and signs that everyone is going to make fun of him.

"Where? At school?" Jake nods. "Nobody is going to make fun of you."

Then Jake gives him this look like he's so stupid or something- or somehow so far out of reach with middle school reality that he couldn't possibly understand the way things work. Sam can see all of that on his face, and he really tries to imagine kids being so cruel that they would use another kid getting sick as bait for teasing. Are kids really _that _cruel? Apparently Jake thinks so because he recaps the situation like Sam isn't aware of what happened. He says he _passed out. _In the middle of the _classroom. _And _everyone _saw.

Sam opens his mouth to reiterate that nobody is going to make fun of him for getting sick, but a nurse comes in to get the blood sample, and he has to deal with that instead. Jake's gotten better, but he's still a little afraid of needles, and he obviously doesn't like the fact that the nurse is pulling one out and thumping his arm trying to find a vein. Quinn obviously picks up on it and puts her arm back around him, probably both to comfort him and hold him in place a little bit. She kisses the side of his forehead and gets him to look at her while the nurse actually inserts the needle. He does jump a little bit and looks back down while she fills up two tubes of blood, but he doesn't freak out or anything. So that's good at least.

They spend the next half hour trying (and failing) to convince Jake that nobody is going to tease him for getting sick, but Jake's not having any of it. Apparently he really does think they're both too stupid to understand how things work at middle school, and it's sad that Sam can remember feeling exactly the same way so many times in regards to his own parents. It makes him wonder if he's turning into his parents or something- one of those adults that glamorizes being a kid as being so fun and so easy when really, being a kid is like the hardest thing ever. But still, he cannot wrap his head around kids, especially the kids in Jake's class, being so mean that they would bully another kid because he got sick during school. But Jake is adamant, saying over and over again that they're all going to laugh at him and make fun of him, and it's obvious that he's really embarrassed by all of this already.

By the time the doctor gets back, Jake's all but shut down again, and he's back to leaning against the wall and avoiding eye contact. Sam doesn't push it, and Quinn also obviously realizes there's no point to it. Dr. Ziegler comes back with Jake's file in his hand and grabs the blood pressure cuff from the wall.

"All of his blood work looks good, so I don't think there's any indication that the infection has moved anywhere else besides his ear." He pushes Jake's sleeve up and slips the cuff on him. "I'm going to prescribe him some antibiotic eardrops, but you need to get him into his audiologist as soon as possible because I'm really worried about the fact that he can't feel pain there." He watches the blood pressure monitor and then unwraps the cuff. "His blood pressure is a little bit higher now than it was when he got here, but it's still low. I'm going to write him out of school for a few days, and you should just keep an eye on him. If he starts looking tired or pale, he probably needs to lie down. And try to get as much sodium into him as possible, any kind of salty foods are good. And keep him extra-hydrated. Gatorade, that kind of stuff, as many liquids as possible."

Dr. Ziegler rips a sheet from his prescription pad and hands it along with a few other papers to Quinn, and Sam helps Jake get down from the exam table. He keeps a hand there to steady him, but Jake steps away almost immediately and heads for the door, obviously trying to get out of here as soon as possible.

"Bring him back if he seems to get worse. And have your audiologist call for this report."

Sam nods and follows Jake out the door, wondering how just how bad this is going to end up being.

…

They call the audiologist's office, but the first open appointment isn't for another two weeks.

Jake spends the rest of the week at home, mostly shut in his bedroom and doing his very best to avoid interactions with other people. Sam knows it's bad because even his mother mentions Jake being closed off, and when Jake's closed off from his grandmother, then there's definitely something wrong.

Sam gets it, he does. He knows Jake is worried that he's going to be the school's newest target when he goes back, but Sam doesn't believe that. Yesterday when he went to the school to pick up Jake's homework, everyone in the class crowded him asking him if Jake was okay and what was wrong with him. They didn't seem like they wanted to make his life a living hell for getting ill, they just seemed like a group of kids who were worried about their friend. And Ms. Culmner said that they'd all been asking constantly if he was alright and when he was coming back- no indication whatsoever that anyone wanted to make fun of him or was laughing about him behind his back.

But Jake doesn't believe that.

He all but ignored Sam when he tried to tell him how concerned his classmates were. He just took his assignments, went back to his bedroom, and has made maybe a total of five or six trips outside of his room since.

And Sam doesn't know what else to do, so he just leaves him alone.

…

Quinn is beautiful.

Obviously this is not a new development, she's been beautiful forever. But sometimes, it's like honestly distracting. It sounds silly, but sometimes Sam just like looks at her and feels like he's in some kind of parallel universe or something because women like that don't end up with guys with him. He's not being conceited, but he knows he's attractive, so he's kind of always had pretty girls. They like to date him, or whatever, because they think he's cute. But those ones like Quinn… who are beautiful on a whole other level and _smart, _too? They end up with big investment bankers and CEOs who make six or seven figures and live in giant houses in the most expensive, exclusive neighborhoods. They spend their Saturday nights at cocktail parties while the nanny watches their children and puts them to bed. That's just the order of the world.

But here's Quinn, sitting on the floor in front of the couch, trapping Ethan into a bear hug so she can tickle him and cover him in kisses while he screams and laughs while Riley giggles at her own reflection while she lies on a play mat beside them. It's definitely not a cocktail party, and her pajama pants and tank top are a far cry from a little black dress, but she just looks _so beautiful. _He kind of wants to just tell the kids it's sleep time and then take her to bed right now, but it's only like six o'clock, so he's going to be waiting at least a few more hours before he can get her naked.

He gets distracted anyway because Hunter's standing in front of his chair just staring at him, and Sam's not sure what he wants or how long he's been there. So when Hunter doesn't say anything, Sam just holds out a hand and helps him climb up into the chair. Hunter just sits there on his knees, half on Sam's lap, half on the chair, and doesn't move or do anything else.

"What's wrong, bud?" Sam pushes some bangs back from Hunter's forehead and looks at him. It's probably about time for a haircut.

Hunter answers, though, surprisingly. He pokes his lower lip out a little bit and just says, "I'm sad," in this quiet little, pitiful voice.

"Why are you sad?"

"Nobody plays with me." He's pouting and being super dramatic, but he's two, so Sam humors him.

"What do you want to play?"

Hunter doesn't answer that. He just sits there with his lip out, looking sad and like some poor, neglected baby who never gets any kind of attention at all.

"You want to sing?" Hunter considers it for a few minutes and then finally nods, so Sam leans over and grabs the remote from the coffee table so he can turn on the first kiddie music video channel he can find.

Just his luck, it happens to be playing that Monkeys Jumping on the Bed song that sometimes haunts his nightmares but that his kids love. It's kind of fun anyway, even if the song is annoying, because he gets to flip his kids upside down and (lightly) "bump" their heads on the ground before handing them off to Momma, so she can call the doctor and tickle them some more. They love it. Ethan's probably getting a little too big for it, but he still runs over for his turn because anything that involves going upside down is obviously awesome, and both Ethan and Hunter are laughing and in great moods by the time the song ends, and Hunter's happy to stand in front of the TV and sing Itsy Bitsy Spider and Ten in the Bed for the next little bit while Ethan tries to "help" him dance and say all the words.

He does manage to snag Quinn, though, when she stands up with Riley. He grabs her waist and pulls her down to his lap. He's not gonna lie- he likes the way she fits there, and it gives him really easy access to kiss her, which is something he's always pretty much down for, especially right now while the kids are good and distracted. He's anxious for them to be totally distracted by sleep, but this'll do for now.

He kisses her neck, right below her ear, because she really likes that, and she's going to be a lot easier to get on board with early bedtime if she's got her own personal agenda. She's just so damn beautiful. Especially right now, sitting in his lap and holding his baby. It's like the sexiest thing ever.

"You're pretty." He knows how to get to her, and the reluctant smile she gives him over her shoulder lets him know it's working. He pretends not to notice, though, and instead bops Riley's nose with his finger. "And you're pretty, too." She smiles, too, and looks just like Quinn just with less teeth.

"Am I pretty?" Ethan obviously gets bored because he runs back over and looks up at them anxiously. Quinn laughs because this is obviously amusing to her, and all Sam can do is roll his eyes.

"Yeah. Gorgeous."

Ethan's all smiles as he takes it upon himself to climb up into the chair with his parents and little sister. Hunter's not going to be left behind, though, and comes running over to squeeze into a spot, too. Quinn just barely moves Riley's head out of the way in time.

"Ugh. Y'all are trying to smother me." Sam attempts to shift positions, but it's virtually impossible.

"Nuh-uh," Ethan shakes his head at the exact same time Hunter nods his happily.

Sam should probably just be glad that his other kid isn't intent on dog-piling him, too, because he's not really sure how many more people he can fit in his lap. But then again, with the depressed, mopey way Jake's been acting lately, he'd kind of welcome it.

Plus, he's already got four people on top of him, what's one more?

…

A/N: Thanks to everyone who keeps leaving reviews! You guys are awesome, and I really appreciate it.


	21. Chapter 21

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 21**

…

Thanksgiving is one of the best holidays ever invented.

For one, it is an awesome way to pad his pockets right before Christmas because the gym blows up the week after Thanksgiving like nobody's business. The only time he's richer is in January before everyone has a chance to break their New Year's Resolution. He also gets a nice bump in business right before swimsuit season starts, but as far as a single week goes… Nothing beats that week after Thanksgiving.

The other reason it's one of the best holidays ever is because it gives him (just like all his clients) a valid excuse to eat way more than he would on any other given day of the year. Plus, his mom is like the best cook in the world, and he doesn't even think he's being all that biased. It's probably a good thing he was so into sports when he was a kid, or he probably could have gotten super fat. But Thanksgiving is totally worth the extra miles on his run and the extra crunches he has to do afterward.

He's from Tennessee, and both of his parents lived there until well into their adult lives. That's where his mom learned to cook. So Thanksgiving is amazing, deep-fried turkey and like every kind of side you can imagine. Plus all the desserts. It's awesome, okay? So he really, really likes that holiday.

Or, you know, he _should_ like it, except for those times when drama outweighs the deliciousness of the food.

It's a holiday. They should go into expecting at least a little drama, right? There's no such thing as a family holiday if somebody doesn't get in a fight or start an out of control debate. A good topic for these debates is politics, especially over the last few years since Stevie has decided to, at least in his dad's opinion, forsake the entire family and started swinging very much left in all areas. Sam tries to stay out of it for the most part- one, because he doesn't care enough politics one way or the other to get worked up, and two, because it's Stevie, and that's just what he does. Sam's just waiting for the day when he shows up and announces he's taken up Buddhism or something because he goes against the grain in like everything and always has. He's definitely his own person, and it's not like you can fault him for that. Or at least it's not like you _should _fault him for it. But he unfortunately gets faulted a lot because open-mindedness is not really one of his father's strong points.

So that's expected. They usually make it about three quarters of the way through the meal before the first argument, but there are always at least two more after that, usually right in the middle of the football game, which sucks because that's like the second best part of Thanksgiving. But whatever.

But by the middle of the afternoon, Sam's actually wishing for some stupid Democrat/Republican drama to take away from the Thanksgiving disaster currently unfolding at his parents' house.

His in-laws are in town, just like they have been for the past few years. He and Quinn used to try to split Thanksgiving weekend between their parents, but it was always too much trouble to go to Lima the day after Thanksgiving, especially since there was no real reason to go there other than to just see Judy and Roger. Thanksgiving would be over by that time, so it'd essentially just be any random weekend that they could take any time. So Sam kind of started hinting around until his mom took it upon herself to invite Judy and Roger to their house for Thanksgiving so that everyone could be together and that the kids could have their whole family in one spot. It worked out, too, because their parents really do get along, and there's never been any kind of awkwardness or anything between them. Plus, it really is nice for the kids to have their grandparents come in for a few days and have their whole family around for the holiday. So it's become tradition.

They don't have a car that's big enough to fit everybody, so Sam takes Hunter and picks Judy and Roger up from their hotel, while Quinn takes the rest of the kids and meets him at his parents' house. They all end up beating his brother and sister, though, and there's just a whole lot of small talk while things take flight in the kitchen. Sam thinks it's kind of crappy that he's the only one who has to help, but it makes sense because there is literally no one else in the house right now who could possibly be of any assistance. It'd be the same way even if his siblings were there- he's the only one who ever had to learn how to cook out of all the kids, and his dad sucks and Quinn sucks and Judy sucks and, well, he doesn't really know if Roger sucks, but there's no way anybody's going to ask him to help. So it's just Sam and his mom, but it's not bad because it's not like she actually lets him do much- she just gives him all the bitch work, but whatever, he doesn't want to risk screwing something up and missing out on anything that's going to make this meal the best ever.

And anyway, he likes hanging out with his mom. It's probably lame or something, but he loves her, and she's like the best mom ever or something. He hasn't seen her in a couple of days , so it's nice to get to hang out with her for a little while, and he gets to fill her in on all the stuff the audiologist said yesterday about Jake.

"She said it looks like most of the nerve endings in his left ear are dead. So he's got to have surgery to see if she can fix them."

They all kind of knew it was coming, so it wasn't really a surprise when Dr. Black gave her diagnosis. But it still sucks. Jake's not happy like at all, but who can blame him? He's been super self-conscious ever since he passed out, and he still seems to think people are making fun of him behind his back or something, despite the fact that there's been basically zero indication of anything like that whatsoever.

"What if she can't fix it?" His mom's rolling out homemade biscuit dough, and she looks at him from her spot by the table.

"She said if it's not able to be repaired that she would just remove as much of the dead tissue as she could."

"Is his infection gone?"

"Not totally, but I guess it must look a lot better than it did in the ER because she said it wasn't bad. She said he needs to keep taking the drops."

His mom sighs and puts one knee up in a chair while she evens out the dough. "I just wish Jake could catch a break."

"I know." Sam throws some potato peels into the makeshift trash bag beside the sink. "She said she'd schedule the surgery for Christmas break so that he doesn't have to miss school or anything. But that sucks because it'll basically ruin his Christmas _and _his birthday."

"You need to have his party before then. Because he might not feel like it after his surgery, and this is a big birthday."

A big birthday. Yeah.

"I don't want him to be thirteen." His mom kind of smiles like she's amused, but Sam doesn't really know what's funny. "Everything's going too fast."

"And it will keep going too fast." She finishes rolling out the dough and moves to get a jar from the cabinet so that she can shape the biscuits and set them aside to bake later. "You wake up one day, and your youngest kid is graduating from college. And you swear it was just yesterday that you were taking her to preschool. It's crazy."

"I just always worry that I'm doing everything wrong." He spots the jar she needs when she opens the cabinet and grabs it for her so that she doesn't have to reach.

"You're doing everything right, Sam." She puts a hand on his back and rubs it a little bit- it's so crazy how relaxed it instantly makes him. "Trust me. Watching you with those babies is what makes me the proudest out of everything. That's what makes me think maybe _I _did something right."

He doesn't say anything, mostly because he's embarrassed but also because he wouldn't know what to say anyway. He's not like the best ever at taking compliments, but they always mean a lot to him. Especially from people that matter, and his mom definitely matters. She doesn't push it or anything, just moves onto her next project and tells him that the hardboiled eggs need to be peeled when the potatoes are finished.

He can do that.

…

Stevie and Stacy show up separately, which is weird because they basically always drive in together.

But Stevie shows up first with like three garbage bags of laundry that needs to be done. Apparently he didn't get the memo that you're supposed to stop bringing your dirty laundry home once you're out of college or something, but it doesn't matter because he knows his mom will do it one way or another, and that's exactly why he agreed to stay for the whole weekend. Sam kind of wants to corner him about Stacy, but he doesn't really get the chance between helping his mom and handling a mini-crisis when Ethan realizes what turkey really is and starts freaking out because he doesn't "want to eat a real bird."

All of that pretty much takes up all of his time until the last of the dinner party arrives, and Stacy shows up with Tyler sporting all kinds of fake smiles.

It's not surprising that Tyler is here. He's been here for the past two Thanksgivings. What's surprising is that Sam has the sudden urge to like punch him or something even though he knows that's dumb. It's stupid, okay? But now it's like _official _or something, and he knows for a fact, without a doubt that this dude is sleeping with his baby sister. And even though he technically knew that before, knowing it for a _fact _makes him feel all kind of violent urges or something.

He checks out their hands the second they walk in the door, and neither one of them is wearing a ring. Stacy didn't have one on when she popped in at his house a few weeks ago, either, and Sam's not sure if they're not wearing them to hide the obvious or if they don't even have them. He doesn't really see how they could afford rings, given the fact that both of them are basically making minimum wage and can probably even barely make ends meet.

Quinn must be reading his mind or something because she distracts him from his thoughts and asks if he can help her with diaper duty because apparently Hunter and Riley are on synchronized pooping schedules or something. They take the kids back to his parents' room, and he gets Hunter while she gets Riley. He gets the shitty end of the deal (literally) because an almost three year old's poops are way worse than a three month old's (although she's been known to have some pretty massive blowouts herself).

"Do you think she's going to tell them?" Quinn grabs the wipes out of the diaper bag and throws them to him.

"Would she really be dumb enough to drop that in the middle of Thanksgiving dinner?"

Quinn just looks at him. So okay, yeah, maybe she would be that dumb.

"Tyler might need to have an escape route planned in case your dad goes for a hunting rifle or something."

Sam shakes his head and starts in on Hunter's diaper. "I still can't believe she did this. And she's an idiot if she thinks today's the best day to tell." He starts to say something else, but he gets distracted by a smell way too raunchy for a little kid. "Dude, you gotta start using the potty… This is nasty."

Hunter just laughs because apparently that's hilarious to him or something. Sam rolls his eyes because it's totally not funny from his end while he's cleaning up the mess. Quinn beats him in the diaper changing race by a long shot, but he still doesn't think it's an even fight anyway, so he's only a little bit bitter when she's throwing away a dirty diaper and pulling Riley's leggings back up under her dress while he's still wiping what appears to be full grown man poop off his son's butt.

Hunter's in a super silly mood, and he gets on a kick where he starts giggling and can't stop. It makes Sam and Quinn laugh, too, because nobody even knows what's funny, and Riley smiles, too, because apparently she likes the sound of everybody laughing. But Hunter is cracking up at God knows what and all out of control giggly even after Sam gets him changed and pulls him to his feet so he can pull his jeans up. Hunter starts jumping on the bed, which isn't surprising because he's standing on a bed, he thinks he needs to start jumping. Sam really doesn't care that much, but he tells him to be careful because Riley's still lying there, and that kind of looks like a disaster waiting to happen.

"Daddy!" Hunter stumbles over to where Sam's standing beside the bed and puts his hands on Sam's cheeks, laughing when he squishes his face.

"What, crazy?" Sam goes in for the sneak attack and hugs him, squeezing him super tight and laughing when Hunter squeals.

"I'm hungry!"

"Well, go tell Nana, and she'll get you something." He picks him up and swings him around before standing him on the ground and kicking at his butt a little to nudge him in the direction of the door.

"Our kids are nuts." Quinn shakes her head as Hunter runs out of the room, obviously in search of some pre-Thanksgiving food.

"Not all of them." Sam climbs onto the bed and lays down on his stomach beside Riley. "Not this angel girl, right?" He tickles her belly a little bit and kisses her nose while she giggles. "You're not nuts, are you? You're just a perfect, sweet baby."

All that's interrupted literally a second later when Ethan comes running into the room to prove Quinn exactly right.

"Momma!"

Quinn just looks at him, obviously confused as to what's so important that he needs to be that excited. "What?"

"Jake's mean!"

"Why?"

"Jake's mean!" Apparently saying it twice makes it more meaningful or something.

"What did he do?"

"He's a butt face!"

Sam snorts and can't help it. He tries really hard not to laugh, but it doesn't work, so he ends up just turning his face away because logic tells him that Quinn might literally kill him for laughing at something that she apparently finds very offensive.

"Don't say that! Where did you hear that?"

"I don't know!" Ethan is literally screaming every word, which, truthfully, kind of just makes it funnier. "Mickey Mouse!"

"Mickey Mouse did not call anybody a butt face. That's not nice."

"Jake's not nice!"

"Why are you _yelling?" _Quinn is obviously getting irritated, so Sam takes a chance and turns his head so that he can actually see what's going on. Ethan's just shaking his head, and Quinn asks again. "Why are you yelling?"

"I don't know!"

"You need to calm down."

"I can't!"

She grabs his arm for a warning. "Do you need to go to time out?"

"No!"

"Then stop screaming."

"I can't!"

It's getting harder and harder not to crack up, but obviously that's not good parenting or whatever. But it's still funny.

"Ethan," Quinn's got her best _you're about to be in big trouble _voice on, but Ethan's too hard-headed to recognize it. "Stop screaming, or you're going to the corner."

"I can't!" His face is so red that it's kind of hilarious. "My head says I can't!"

"That's not your head, son. That's that demon you got in there." Sam speaks up for the first time, and Quinn shoots him a death glare, obviously for hinting that their child is possessed by a demon.

Ethan, though, seems to agree. "That's my demon!"

"Really, Sam?" And she slaps him across the back of the head for good measure. He's already laughing again because he can't help it and also because it's freaking hilarious.

"My demon says scream!" Sam can't stop laughing, and Quinn looks ready to kill somebody. She puts a hand over Ethan's mouth to physically silence him, and it works for about ten seconds before he realizes he can scream around it. "Ahhh!"

Ethan ends up in time out, and Sam ends up with an earful, but whatever. It's still funny.

…

Dinner is definitely the best.

He likes more than just the food, though, even though that's the part that gets the most attention. But he just likes the whole thing in general. He likes sitting down and squeezing too many people around the table and holding hands and praying. And this is like his whole entire family, okay? That's important, and he doesn't miss the whole point of giving thanks and all that because he's got a whole lot in his life to be thankful for.

But the food is just freaking amazing.

They all eat and talk, and it's all really normal. Hunter's still giggly, so he's being extra silly, but nobody gets onto him or anything because he's not really bothering anything, and everybody's too caught up in their own conversations. Sam half-listens while Roger and his dad start talking about politics, and it kind of seems like they're purposely baiting Stevie and are just waiting for him to give his own opinion so they can both tell him how wrong he is. Sam kind of just wants to reach over and kick him and do some kind of secret brother eye voodoo or something and tell him not to give them the pleasure, but he doesn't. And Stevie can't help but tell them his own opinion on their views, which obviously leads to a gang up of two set in their ways old men against one kid who's apparently too stupid and naïve in their eyes to possibly have any valid points. Meanwhile, Quinn's being passive-aggressively rude to her mother while Judy gives her opinion about the fact that Quinn's working so many hours with all those kids at home and about how she went back to work too fast and probably didn't even get a real opportunity to bond with her baby. Sam watches his mom pretend to be too busy helping Hunter to notice that Judy's looking to her for backup.

And as crazy as it all is, it's also kind of normal in a way.

But then it happens. Somewhere right as everyone is starting dessert, Stacy says she has something to tell everyone, and Sam immediately wants to either like disappear or kill her because there's no way this is gonna be good. He's not sure what's up with all the formalness like she's about to make some kind of announcement that's actually going to make their parents happy or something. She's dumb.

Everyone- well, his parents and Judy and Roger anyway… oh, and Jake- just looks at her. It's obvious that they're all expecting one of two options- pregnancy or engagement. So when she says, "Tyler and I got married in August," Sam's kind of surprised that nobody actually faints.

He watches his parents closely, waiting for some kind of reaction. It's so quiet that you could literally like hear a pin drop. Even Hunter stops giggling long enough to let the dramatics raise to the highest possible level. Sam's just waiting, knowing that there's no way this is going to end well.

He's right. And a minute later, his mom starts crying.

Really, her eyes just well up, but she won't say anything, and she turns her head so that she doesn't have to look at anyone. Apparently that's all it takes to set his dad off, though, because he starts in a second later.

"Are you serious right now?"

"We just wanted to wait for the right time to tell you. We-"

"And now is the right time? Three months later?!"

"Dad-"

"What is _wrong _with you? You're too young to be married!"

"There's nothing wrong with me. And I'm twenty-two!"

It feels like déjà vu or something, and this is practically the exact same defense speech that Stacy gave him last month. He blocks it out because he's too focused on how upset his mom is. Stacy and his dad are fighting in the background, but all Sam can see is that his mother looks every bit as heartbroken as he'd knew she'd be, and he can't help but feel even more pissed at Stacy about this whole thing than he was before. Tyler's just sitting there looking kind of dumbfounded, and Sam thinks it's pretty shitty that he can't even jump in and take some of the heat for this. He's just sitting there watching Stacy list off all the reasons why this isn't a totally stupid mistake.

It gets really heated really fast, and Sam kind of thinks his dad might really murder somebody or something, but then it calms down just as fast when his mom finally can't take it anymore and just gets up to leave the table. She doesn't say anything, and nobody else does, either. They all just watch her go, and it's back to that really smothering kind of silence again.

Then his dad looks at Stacy and says, "There. Are you happy now?" and Stacy bursts into tears, too.

Sam thinks that's really dumb. And also really fake. Stacy's not stupid- not by a long shot. She figured out that crying gets her out of trouble and makes things go her way a _long _time ago. So Sam's not even remotely surprised to see her tears now.

"Why is everybody _mad _at me?! Why can't you just be _happy?" _She's also a little bit (a lot) dramatic.

Surprisingly enough, this might be the first time in history that her tears don't work, and all she gets from their dad is an eye roll and more accusations. "You must like seeing your mother cry to pull this kind of crap!"

"Stop yelling at me!"

And on and on and on. It's super dramatic, and Sam's mostly just pissed that he can't enjoy the pumpkin pie because digging into it right now in the middle of this argument would probably be bad taste. His younger kids don't seem to be having that same kind of problem, though, and both Hunter and Ethan are eating their desserts and are somehow totally oblivious to all the yelling going on around them.

It all comes to a head when Stacy gets up and leaves, too. She goes off in the same direction that their mom went, and Tyler doesn't have enough sense to go after her, so he's just left there at the table with a man who wants to kill him and happens to have a whole arsenal of rifles in the basement, along with the heads of several large animals. Sam kind of thinks the first human head might get added to that collection tonight, and he can't decide whether he's for this or against it.

It doesn't matter anyway because his dad finds a new target almost immediately, and, surprisingly, it's not Tyler. It's Stevie.

"You knew about this, didn't you?"

Stevie just looks at him. He's smart enough not to directly answer the question, but it's pretty obvious from his face. It'd be pretty obvious anyway, given the fact that Stacy and Stevie are like secret best friends who only sometimes hate each other.

"You didn't think maybe you should stop her from doing something that stupid?"

"How was I supposed to stop her?" Stevie sounds super calm, which is a little unnerving. "You realize she's an adult, right?"

"Yeah, and you're supposed to look out for her!"

"I look out for her all the time. But she's old enough to make her own decisions."

"You're an idiot." Stevie just rolls his eyes, and Sam feels sorry for him. He feels sorry for himself, too, when his dad seems to realize that Stevie wasn't the only unsurprised one at the table. "You knew about this, too." He looks right at Sam. And then at Quinn. And then back at Sam. When nobody says anything, he shakes his head in disbelief. "_Unbelievable. _And none of you bothered to tell us?"

"I'm not getting in the middle of this." Sam refuses to go down for this. It has absolutely jack shit to do with him.

"It's not our place to tell Stacy's business," Stevie says, and now he's got a little bit of an edge to his voice. "She didn't have to tell you at all. You should just be glad she did."

"You need to watch it," his dad says warningly, like there's really something he could do. "You should have stopped this. This is your fault."

Sam's still not sure how Tyler's sitting there and has yet to get one word thrown against him. He's still not sure how this is anybody but Tyler and Stacy's fault, and apparently his brother's confused, too.

"How exactly is this _my _fault?"

"She's your little sister! You're supposed to take care of her!"

And Stevie rolls his eyes again. "Whatever. I'm not doing this." He pushes his chair back and gets up. Apparently this is the Thanksgiving of walk outs or something.

"I'm not done talking to you."

"Yeah, you are." Stevie reaches into his pocket, obviously checking for keys and his phone or something. "And I'm done talking to you, too, because you don't give a shit what I say anyway."

Sam holds his breath on that one, and he glances sideways at Quinn who looks equally as nervous. Judy and Roger are both just sitting there looking one-hundred percent out of place. Tyler still looks like he might shit on himself or something.

"You need to watch your language. There are kids in here."

And Stevie just shakes his head. "Oh, my bad. Hunter? E? I apologize for cussing in front of you." He looks at Sam and Quinn. "When the baby wakes up, tell her I'm sorry. Jake?" He shrugs one shoulder. "You can say shit if you want to. You can also say fuck. Or whatever the hell you want. If you get in trouble, just blame it on me. Everybody else does."

He's gone after that, not in the same direction as his mom and sister but like _gone gone. _He slams the backdoor for good measure, and Sam doesn't know whether he should go after him or not, but he hears the car driving away a few seconds later anyway. It's more awkward than ever and super uncomfortable. There are probably for real like five straight full minutes of total silence when everybody just looks at each other.

It's Quinn who finally breaks it. She looks at her parents and says, "Jake has to have surgery next month," in this really nonchalant voice to break the tension.

Judy immediately falls into her role and puts on her concerned face. "Oh, no! What for?"

Sam keeps an eye on his dad who is absolutely seething and also looks like he feels a little bit guilty. Just a little bit. He's not paying attention to the Quinn/Judy conversation, but he looks up when Ethan decides he needs to start with the yelling again.

"Papaw! I got a demon! He's my friend!"

Judy cuts herself off mid-sentence, and Quinn just closes her eyes like she wants to disappear. Sam wants to laugh, but he can't.

Too soon.

…

So Thanksgiving is a little bit of a bust.

Okay, it's a lot of a bust. Too much drama, not enough food. Plus, the football game is totally ruined by Stacy's dramatics, so Sam's super glad to just go home already. The kids are really tired, and it doesn't take much convincing to get Hunter and Ethan into bed. Riley's a little more difficult and gets fussy when it's time to sleep, but she goes down eventually. Jake, on the other hand, is wide awake and kind of buzzing from all the excitement and drama, but he goes to his room, which is fine with Sam because he's kind of ready to pass out himself.

Quinn follows him to their room, and it takes next to no time before they're both ready to climb into bed. All this drama is exhausting, and it's definitely been a long day.

"Today was too much." Quinn straightens the pillows and then crawls under the blankets. It's kind of cold, and she looks so super warm that it only makes sense to follow her lead.

"My dad's such a dick to Stevie."

"Why is that?"

Sam shrugs and gets himself situated. He was totally right about how warm this is. "I don't know why he treats him like that. They just don't get along."

Things calmed down a little bit as the night went on. Everybody stopped crying at least, but it was still pretty awkward. There was a tiny bit of civil conversation after everybody got their emotions under control, but not a lot got resolved. Stevie didn't answer his phone when Sam tried to call him later, but that wasn't really surprising. It was just a lot, and Sam's just glad to be away from it right now.

"Are you going to try to call him again?"

"I'll try tomorrow. I'm sure Stevie's just pissed, too. I'll talk to him." Sam rolls onto his side and reaches for Quinn's hip to pull her over toward him. "You're warm."

"You called me hot last night."

"Every night." Quinn rolls her eyes a little bit, but she's smiling, too. "Mmm…. I'm glad I'm the good kid."

"The good kid?" She raises her eyebrows like she doesn't believe that.

"I never ran off and eloped, and I never became a registered Democrat. I'm the good kid. My parents love me."

"You _did _knock a girl up on freshman spring break, didn't you?"

Sam shrugs. "They got over that forever ago. I never did anything else."

"Hmm… Do you remember being a teenage stripper?"

He shakes his head and puts his face into her neck. "Shh… That's a secret." He reaches up to put a finger over her lips. "And we're married, so you can't testify against me. There's like a law."

"That law says I can't be _forced _to testify against you. Not that I can't."

He rolls his eyes and lifts his head so that he can kiss her. "Could you shut up and just let me tell you how much I love you?"

"Tell me nicely enough, and I'll forgive you for telling me to shut up."

"I _asked_ you if _could _shut up. I didn't tell you."

"Okay." She lets him kiss her again, which is awesome. He likes the way her mouth tastes, all fresh from brushing her teeth and getting ready. And obviously he likes the way her body feels when he slides his hand around the back of her hip and down to her butt.

All the drama kind of melts away. He's totally just trying to get some right now, but he's not kidding about loving the crap out of her. It's still Thanksgiving, and there's a lot to be thankful for. Specifically, there're five things to be super thankful for, and they're all right here under one roof. And maybe his second favorite holiday was kind of ruined by some craziness, but it really doesn't matter because even though the food part is awesome, the whole point of the holiday is to realize what you've got in your life and be thankful for it. But he already knows how great his life is, and he thanks God for it every single day.

Plus, even though dessert was interrupted, his mom sent home a whole pumpkin pie, so it's all good.

…

A/N: Ugh, I've been having such issues with this website! Hopefully everything is fixed and this posts okay. Thank you for the reviews; they mean so much!


	22. Chapter 22

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 22**

…

He's stressed.

He knows it's just normal this time of the year and everything, but it seems like there's so much going on that he can't even wrap his head around it. He's trying to figure out how to afford Christmas for four kids and birthdays for two. He's trying to work as many hours as possible and make sure he's got everything lined up, since he's got to be off while one of his kids has surgery. On top of all that, he's been sick for like a week straight, and it sucks.

Quinn's stressed out, too, and they both kind of neglect Hunter's birthday party until it sneaks up on them. They throw something together pretty last minute, and it totally sucks in comparison to what Ethan had over the summer. It's not fair, but they can't really help it. They get most of the family together and have cake and ice cream, and luckily, Hunter's distracted enough by that and the pile of presents to not pay much attention to the fact that this party is significantly low budget compared to the one his brother had a few months ago.

Jake's party isn't going to be that simple, though, because unlike Hunter, he actually has people besides grandparents that he'd like to see at his party. So they'll still do the normal family stuff, but it's Jake's thirteenth birthday, and he wants to do stuff with his friends. Sam tries to give him suggestions about stuff they could do, but he gets eye roll after eye roll until Jake finally just tells him he wants a normal party with his friends at the house. With no little kids and as little parents as possible.

The basement's not the ideal party spot or anything, but it's big and heated, and there're a few pieces of furniture down there. That's where Jake wants to be, though, so Sam tells him okay, even though Quinn still seems kind of convinced that somebody's going to end up pregnant or something.

Jake gets his braces off a week before his party, which is a victory in itself because it's like six months ahead of schedule. He's super excited, and who can blame him? Braces suck. So it's like an early celebration, especially considering the fact that his teeth look _great _and it's obvious that he knows it. He wants _clothes _for his birthday, so Sam takes him shopping when they get done at the orthodontist and ends up spending more than he really planned. He still thinks it's kind of weird that Jake would rather have clothes and shoes than video games all of a sudden (especially considering the fact that he spends five days a week in a school uniform), but whatever. Maybe he's just growing up.

Growing up.

Thirteen is legit a teenager. That's scary. And it makes Sam feel really old. He doesn't know how time went by so quick, but it was seriously just yesterday when he was freaking out trying to put together a Pack 'n Play for the first time. And now here he is worrying about thirteenth birthday parties. It doesn't seem real or possible.

And it makes him more than a little sad.

…

A few days before Jake's party, though, the whole family goes to a Christmas festival at church.

It's mostly just for the kids. They have games and crafts set up. They even have Santa Claus come in and take pictures with the kids. It's just something fun for kids to do, but there are a couple of other things to do, too. There are a couple of activities set up for the older youth group, and there's a bake sale and some artsy stuff on sale for the adults. They usually meet up with Sam's parents here, but they're apparently actually making an effort to not be evil where Stacy's concerned and are in Louisville visiting and are at least trying to be accepting. Or at least that's what they're _supposed _to be doing. Sam hasn't actually heard from anyone, so he's not sure how well it's going over, but hopefully nobody's dead yet.

The kids all scatter when they get to the festival. It's not freezing, so most of it is outside because there's more space than inside the church basement. They do manage to get them together long enough so that the little kids can see Santa, but Riley starts screaming the second she's handed over, and the picture's just kind of a disaster. It just follows tradition, though. Jake always hated stuff like that, and so far with Ethan and Hunter, they haven't managed to have a year where they're both happy to pose for a picture. This year when they actually _are, _Riley throws a fit. So, yeah. Pictures with Santa Claus are probably never going to be a successful venture in their house.

Ethan and Hunter run off to play some game while Jake looks bored and seems to be wandering around just so that he has something to do besides sit at a table with his parents and little sister. Occasionally, he'll meet up with his brothers and help them with whatever they're doing, but he stays by himself for the most part. His phone is permanently attached to his hand now anyway, so he spends like ninety percent of the day texting.

Sam sits with Quinn, and she plays with Riley while he watches and tries really hard not to think about anything else. There are two weeks to Christmas, and they're nowhere near ready. Plus, they've got Jake's party in just a few days and then his surgery right after that. It's just really stressful trying to think about how they're going to have time to do everything, much less how they're going to be able to _afford _everything. He knows Christmas is about way more than presents, but it's hard to _not _want to give your kids everything they want. They're only kids once, and Christmas is like magical or something when they're little. They get so excited about everything, and thinking that they're not going to be able to afford to get them all what they really want is just kind of depressing.

Ethan runs up to show off a Christmas bookmark he just made that's basically covered in stickers and red marker, but as his parents, Sam and Quinn both have to pretend to be impressed by his artwork. He's hyped up on sugar cookies and lemonade, and he's talking nonstop.

"There's real angels you can make! And you can put them on the Christmas tree!"

"Really?" Sam does his best to seem interested. "That's cool, buddy."

"Uh-huh, and that lady said we can make a bracelet. And you can play this game where you throw a ball at a snowman. And Daddy, what's a retard?"

That definitely gets Sam's attention, and it gets Quinn's, too. She's been bouncing Riley on her knees, but she stops immediately. "Ethan, you don't ever say that. That's really mean."

She sounds harsh, and it's obvious that Ethan's feelings are a little hurt by the way his face kind of drops. "But what does it mean?"

"_Ethan." _And that's her warning voice, which means she's not in the mood for any kind of questioning or backtalk or whatever. Sam kind of feels bad, though, because Ethan honestly doesn't know what it means, and he's almost in trouble for saying it.

"But that boy said that to Jake. And I told Jake what does it mean, but he doesn't know."

Quinn looks worried, and she looks over Ethan's head at Sam. He only holds eye contact for about three seconds before he looks over to where Jake's sitting by himself on one of the benches, typing something on his phone and looking totally oblivious to everything around him.

"Who said that?" It would probably be better not to even know, but he asks anyway because he really wants to know what bratty little kid is throwing that word around like it doesn't mean anything.

"That boy in the orange shirt." Ethan points to a place close to the snack table where a group of teenagers are standing around looking too cool to be at a church Christmas party. Sam knows them by face, and the boy in the orange is named Jackson. His mom is head of one of the mission committees. Unfortunately for Jackson, he's not a little kid who might be able to get away with making some kind of idiotic statement like that- he's about sixteen years old and also about to get his ass kicked.

"Sam, don't." Quinn must be able to read his mind or something because when he looks at her, she's giving him the same kind of warning look she gives the kids right before they end up in the corner.

"You think it's okay for him to say that stuff in front of our four year old kid? _About _one of our kids?"

"Of course not, but don't make a scene." She's looking around like people might already be watching them or something. "Jake doesn't even understand what he said."

"Yeah, all the more reason to make a scene. Picking on a kid who literally can't defend himself."

"Sam," Quinn says his name slowly and calmly like she's making a point to show him how immature he's being. "How about we make _smart _choices around very impressionable eyes?" And she pointedly looks down at Ethan who still seems really confused.

"Hey, E. Why don't you go get Hunter and help him play that game with the balls?" He ignores the look Quinn gives him because _what? _He's not going to start a fight in front of his kids. He'll just make sure they're distracted first.

Ethan seems perfectly okay with this option and runs off to grab his little brother who's currently playing with one of the little girls from his Sunday School class.

"Don't," Quinn says again the second Ethan's out of hearing distance. "Not here."

Not here why? Because they're in church? Shouldn't that make it even worse? They're supposed to be here for good things, not so some jackass high schooler can pick on little kids with disabilities. So, sorry. It's totally not happening.

He ignores Quinn and walks right over to where Jackson and his friends are standing. They ignore him for a good minute and just keep talking until they're all kind of just looking at him weird, like they're waiting on some kind of explanation as to why this old dude is interrupting their bullshitting session.

When he's got their attention, he looks really pointedly at Jackson and says, "I hear you've got a new nickname for my son."

Jackson looks confused. They all look confused actually. That just pisses Sam off even more for some reason.

"That's my son over there on that bench." He points in Jake's direction, but Jake neither notices or cares. "I'm sure that since most of you have been coming to this church since you were born, most of you probably know Jake."

He looks at them, and eventually they all realize he is actually looking for a response, so they nod and still look pretty confused. It's really hard not to just punch somebody, but he generally tries to not end up in jail, so he stops himself.

"So you know Jake's been deaf his whole life, right? That he has to deal with crap every single day of his life and go through all kinds of struggles, right?" They all just look at him, but he's not looking for an answer anyway. "So you know, it'd be nice if he didn't have to come to _church _and deal with a bunch of idiots who think they're hilarious but are really just a bunch of dumbass douchebags."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Jackson's the one who actually asks it, and that just amps up Sam's anger.

"What the hell am I talking about? Really?" He rolls his eyes. "Next time you want to be a badass and call a little kid a _retard _because he's a little bit different than you, maybe you can come to me and say it to _my _face. How about that?"

"Dude. Nobody called your kid a retard…"

"Oh, really? So you're telling me that my four year old who's never heard that word before in his life just made it up?"

"Yeah."

"So now you're calling my kid a liar?"

"Is there a problem?" Sam looks up just in time to see Jackson's dad walk up. He's in his forties, obviously well-off, Sam doesn't know him that well, but he thinks he has a douche face.

"Yeah, there's a problem. I'm trying to explain the concept of manners and decency to these guys because apparently nobody's ever explained it before."

"Do you want to explain to me what's going on, or should I just assume that you're bullying children?"

Sam actually laughs because it's beyond ironic. "No. But speaking of bullying children, maybe you can explain why your sixteen year old thinks it's okay for him and his friends to laugh at a twelve year old deaf kid and call him a retard? Because I'm not sure that anything at all about that scenario is okay." Yes, Jake is literally a week away from being thirteen, but twelve sounds much better for this situation.

"Is that true?" Douche Face looks at his equally douchey little brat.

"No. I don't know what he's talking about. He just came up and started going off on us."

And then Douche Face just holds his hands up like he's at a loss and raises his eyebrows at Sam.

"Really? You're going to believe that?"

"My son's not a liar."

"Okay. Well, you keep believing that. But just know that the next time he decides to say one word about any of my kids that I'm not going to be nearly as nice."

"You should probably go."

Sam now wants to punch the father _and _the son, but he happens to glance over to where his own son is now watching with full attention. Jake looks confused but also a little apprehensive. When Sam makes eye contact with him, all he gets is a head shake.

So he leaves.

He goes over to Jake who's standing up and putting away his phone. Jake just looks at him and then walks away without saying anything. He goes over to where Quinn is looking thoroughly pissed. She pushes a hand through his hair, which he promptly ducks away from, but when she tells him to go get Ethan and Hunter, he does what she asks without any argument.

Sam takes that as his cue to approach what's clearly going to be a volatile situation if the look on his wife's face is anything to go by. If she yells at him right here and makes a scene, it'll be pretty ironic, but it wouldn't really surprise him.

"I'm ready to go," she says calmly, and she's like pointedly not looking at him. Instead, she starts strapping Riley back into her carrier and putting everything back into the diaper bag.

"He lied about it."

"I don't care." Quinn shakes her head and stands up. "Let's go."

"You don't _care?"_

"No," and she finally looks at him, almost totally furious. "No, I don't care. I'm not talking about this right now. Let's go."

So now he's pissed off, too, that she can't even be bothered to care that somebody's talking shit about Jake. There's kind of a whole bunch he wants to say, but he doesn't. He just grabs the baby carrier before she has a chance to and leaves her there to round up the rest of the kids. He can feel her glaring at his back, but he doesn't care. If she doesn't care about this situation, he's not going to care that she's mad.

He's already got Riley into the car and has it started by the time Quinn makes it to the car with the rest of the kids. He could help, but he really doesn't want to right now. So he just sits there while she climbs over the middle seat to fix the carseats and Jake slides into the seat beside Riley. It takes forever to get everyone situated, but he doesn't care. He blocks out all the whining that's coming from the back and the fact that Quinn's obviously getting extremely irritated by the way Hunter's complaining that he's hot. He knows she's getting even more pissed off by the fact that he's not offering to help at all, but he still doesn't care.

This is turning out to be a great day.

…

It gets even better that night when all the kids are in bed, and everything comes to a head.

Things have been tense ever since they got home. There hasn't been any actual fighting, but that's probably because there hasn't been any actual talking. They eat dinner, and then Sam gets the boys ready for bed while Quinn takes care of putting Riley down. And all of that is pretty normal minus the overdramatic sighs and annoyed looks, so needless to say, he's not totally looking forward to going to bed after he finally gets Ethan to stop Hunter singing the alphabet over and over again and go to sleep.

Quinn's giving him the silent treatment, and he's not even a little bit surprised. She's in the bathroom brushing her teeth, and he really wants to take a shower tonight, but he knows she'll bitch about the water being on so late even though it's really _not _that late and even though it doesn't bother her at all on normal nights.

But then she decides that she can be the one to call _him _out for the silent treatment, and it's almost funny. Almost.

"So we're just going to _not _speak for the rest of our lives or what?"

Okay, seriously? It's been like three hours. "That's a little dramatic. And you started it."

That pisses her off, and she comes out of the bathroom and glares at him while he starts getting undressed. "Well, _excuse me _for not wanting to make even more of a scene. Everyone around was already pretty interested in what was happening prior to that."

"Good. Then they all know what jackasses those kids are."

"No, what they saw was a grown man trying to intimidate a bunch of teenagers."

"Yeah, and I was about five seconds away from kicking somebody's ass, too."

"Oh, that would be great. Then you could spend your daughter's first Christmas in jail. And I'm sure that would just make a _great _memory for the rest of the kids."

She's right, but he's definitely not going to give her that. "Well, excuse _me_ for being sick and tired of everybody else in the world getting to be an asshole while I just have to stand around and ignore shit all the time."

"You have _four kids. _You don't get to be an asshole because you have to be a dad."

"Yeah, and one of those kids has to put up with this bullshit every single day, so sorry for being a little defensive."

"You don't think I know that?"

"No!" And he finally just looks at her because now he's just mad. "No, you don't know it! You haven't had to deal with it for thirteen years!"

Quinn just looks at him. He can't tell whether she's hurt or pissed, but he really doesn't care.

"You've never had to sit there and listen to a doctor tell you that there's something wrong with your kid. That he's never going to be normal. That he's going to be totally different from everybody else around him for his whole life! And you've never had to stand there in line at the grocery store with a two year old who is _literally _screaming himself hoarse while you can't do a damn thing about it because you can't talk to him, and he can't tell you what's wrong. And everyone around is just staring and giving you these dirty looks, and then you can hear people mumbling about how you need to _control your kid. _And you've never had a five year old come up and ask you what he did wrong and why God was _mad _at him and when he would get to be _normal. _Okay? You've never had to deal with any of that. _I _have. I had to deal with _all_ that all by myself, so excuse me for finally saying something back! And excuse me for not really giving a _crap _what other people think because other people are the problem!"

There's total silence when he's done. His face feels hot, and the only thing he can really hear is his own breathing because he's just really worked up. He didn't even mean to get into all that, but now that it's out there, he feels kind of relieved. But Quinn looks kind of like she might cry, and he knows it's because of him. And he knows he said everything wrong. He starts to apologize, but she beats him to it.

"I know that, okay? I'm sorry, I wasn't there. I'm sorry I'm not his real mom!"

"Quinn-"

She has this awful look on her fact like she might be sick or something, and he honestly feels sick. None of this is good. "I'm sorry that he thinks I treat him differently than I treat the other kids, and I'm sorry you obviously think that, too! I don't know what else to do!"

"I don't think th-"

"Because I try really hard!" And now she just sounds kind of desperate. "I try really hard all the time, and I've _been _trying for _five years, _and I don't know what I'm doing wrong!"

"Quinn, stop. You're-"

"I know they all like you better! All the kids like you better than they like me, and that's fine because you _are _better, but I just try, and I don't know what else to do!"

He grabs her, mostly just to make her stop talking, and he wraps her up tight in both arms until she can't really go anywhere or do anything, and maybe it's not the best tactic, but it works. "Stop," he tells her right in her ear. "Let's just stop, okay?"

It takes a few seconds, but then she finally gives a little nod, and he's mostly just glad that she's not crying. He can feel how tense she is, though, so they just stand there like that until they both calm down a little bit. He sits down on the edge of the bed but doesn't let her go, so she's still in his lap. She's got her face pressed into his neck, and he can feel her breathing, so he waits for it to even out before he tries talking again.

"I'm sorry," he says quietly. "I'm sorry I said all that stuff." She shakes her head, but he keeps going. "I shouldn't have said that. Or done any of that stuff today… I just feel really stressed out."

"I know." She moves one hand up to the back of his head and lets her fingers run over his hair.

"I just hate always having to watch Jake go through stuff like that. Even if he doesn't know what's going on, I just hate that people are so mean."

"Do you know when I first came to Cincinnati, that's all I could see?" He doesn't know what she's talking about, but she keeps going. "I saw you with Jake, and it just made me think you were even more perfect than I remembered because all I could think was, what kind of special man does it take to do all this by himself?"

"He's my son."

"I know. And you're the best dad. And I just want to be like _half _of what you are with the kids."

The kids love her. He doesn't know why she can't see that. And he knows he shouldn't bring the Jake stuff up like that because it's not fair to her. He didn't even mean for it to come out the way it did because it's not like that. He's just frustrated and stressed, and sometimes his mouth talks without his brain's permission.

"You know that watching you fall in love with Jake is what made me fall in love with you, right?" He leans his head down to rest on top of hers, and he can feel her starting to relax some. "You're the best thing that ever happened to us, and I'm really sorry I said those things because that doesn't have anything to do with you."

He's not embarrassed to apologize or tell her any of that because it's the truth. She's the first person he ever let in his life like that after Jake, and he was scared. But she was so good with Jake, and Jake just took to her. He'd seen it before, back when he was a kid and Quinn took care of his brother and sister when she didn't have to. He'd watched Stacy idolize her and Stevie think she was like the smartest person on the planet because she knew how to spell like every word he could think of. But more than that, he'd seen Quinn show natural instinct, like she could just automatically know when there'd been too much sugar or when it was time for a nap because tempers were too wound up. But then when he was an adult, and _she _was an adult, and it was actually his child, he just saw it all over again like tenfold. And how could he not fall in love with that?

"I love you." She leans her head up and kisses him before she pushes a hand back through his hair and looks at him.

"And I'm sorry I snapped at church. It just hit me really wrong."

She lifts one shoulder and then smiles a little. "It was kind of hot."

"It was dumb."

"The dumbest stuff is always the hottest."

He starts to laugh, but he kind of gets cut off because she turns herself so that she's got one knee on both sides of him. And then she's kissing him again, only this time it's not so innocent.

But it's not like he's going to complain.

…

A/N: Next up, 13th birthdays and Christmas…


	23. Chapter 23

**ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE**

**Chapter 23**

…

"We need to be down there."

Sam just shakes his head. He's tried everything he knows to convince Quinn that seven seventh graders can't get into all that much trouble. At least not when they're all down in one basement and can't actually go anywhere. They're just down there eating and talking and having fun. It's like the whole class, and luckily, they all get along pretty well because everybody showed up. It's not like there're a ton of kids down there, and they're all basically _good _kids. It's fine. They should just leave them alone.

"Sam, we're responsible for all those kids."

"They're _fine. _If somebody gets hurt or something, we'll know about it."

Quinn still looks really worried, though, and he's still not totally sure why she's so against the idea of a thirteenth birthday party. It's not like they've got fifty kids over. There are literally seven kids down there. The bad thing about Jake's school is that a lot of kids either board or commute from outside the city, so it's hard to get them together for a birthday party over Christmas break. But seven is fine. It's an easy number. So seven kids, some pizza, some video games, and whatever else they want to do to entertain themselves. Sam really doesn't care what they do as long as it's not dangerous or illegal.

If they're doing something dangerous and/or illegal, though, somebody's going to be in a shit-ton of trouble.

So far, though, everything's going fine. The kids are downstairs, not bothering anything, and Sam's fine with just hanging out upstairs with the girls. He pawned Ethan and Hunter off on the grandparents for the night because he promised Jake no little kids would bother the party, and that promise is a lot easier to keep when the little kids aren't there. So it's just him and Quinn and Riley, and that's fine, too, because despite the fact that there are more kids than average in the house, it actually feels like a little vacation.

Riley is getting so big. It seems like she looks different every time he turns around, and he's not exactly thrilled about that because that just means she's always one step closer to growing up like the rest of the kids. But for now at least, she's still a baby, and he wants to keep her that way as long as possible. She learned how to roll over like three days ago, so now she won't stay still. Her new favorite thing is just rolling all over the rug in the living room and using her tummy time mat as a teething toy instead of a nice, clean spot to play.

It's funny that even though she seems like she's gotten so much bigger, she's really still so little. It's even weirder thinking that she's exactly the age Jake was when the accident happened, so he was that tiny when everything about his whole world changed. Sam doesn't remember Jake learning how to roll over and discovering the fact that he could move himself. What he remembers about Jake at this age is being in the hospital and learning how to clean stitches on a four month old baby. And he remembers his parents taking over and like doing everything from contacting the school for withdraw papers to breaking his lease for him to hiring movers and especially to taking care of Jake. It's really terrible looking back, but he's pretty sure he sometimes went for like days at a time without even touching Jake while his parents just did everything. It lasted for a few months, where he would be fine for awhile and then would just randomly get depressed and shut himself out, and they'd take care of the baby and let him just stay in bed sleeping or staring aimlessly at the TV. But eventually his dad got fed up and chewed him out and threatened to kick his ass if he didn't man up and start taking responsibility.

It was actually one of the best conversations he's ever had with his dad. It was one of the rare times they actually had a fight and probably the only time in his entire life that Sam actually yelled back. He's always had a pretty good relationship with his father because unlike his little brother, he's always been pretty receptive to his dad's way of parenting. He was always pretty obedient and basically did whatever he was told without having to be asked twice. He didn't break a lot of rules because consequences actually worked on him, so he was the _yes, sir/no ma'am _kid pretty much until he was grown. But his brother was kind of the opposite because he had a habit of asking _why _and was always too much of his own person to be too obedient. And getting in trouble tended to have like very limited effects on him and would end just pissing him off and making him even more defiant. He was like that his whole life really, and by the time he was a teenager, it's seriously a miracle that nobody was murdered in that house. But Stevie still butts heads with their dad, and he probably will for the rest of his life unless one of them undergoes a major personality transplant, which isn't very likely.

But Sam was always the good one who just listened and did whatever his parents told him to do and rarely made the same mistake twice when it came to rules. He didn't really ever argue and only ever even talked back a few times in his whole life because he learned that lesson the hard way. But that night- it was a few days after he heard the term _profoundly deaf _for the first time- his dad came into his room and told him to get up and that he wasn't allowed to "wallow" anymore, and Sam just kind of snapped. Maybe he was channeling his little brother (who he later found out was listening through the wall with his little sister), or maybe he just had like a whole bunch of pent up anger that needed to come out. But he snapped. And he just started going off about how his dad had no idea what he was going through and how he needed to get off his back because nobody understood how he was feeling. And then he started blaming him for stuff that had nothing to do with him and yelling that his dad didn't even want Jake to be born and that he never even tried to get to know Julia and a bunch of other stuff that really wasn't even true and had nothing to do with nothing but just felt good while it was being yelled. And then he even started bringing up dead and buried stuff and screamed that his dad had no right to judge his parenting skills when he couldn't even keep a roof over his kids' heads and had to let a sixteen year old pay the rent for a year. That's when he stopped. Because he felt bad and knew he was saying mean things, and he wasn't even mad at his dad- he just needed somebody to take stuff out on.

For what it's worth, his dad just let him yell. And then he asked him if he was finished before he laid it out and got real with him. And he surprisingly like didn't hold any of the stuff he said against him or anything, which was good because Sam didn't even mean half that stuff and felt really terrible for saying it. But he didn't coddle him, either. He told him point blank that Sam was not going to ignore his kid and that he and his mom were willing to help but that they weren't going to raise Jake. He told him that he needed to realize that he wasn't allowed to be selfish anymore, even about stuff that really mattered, because once you have kids, you have to give all that up. And he told him that yeah, plenty of bad stuff happens in life and sometimes it feels like more than you can handle, but you can't give up and you just have to fight that much harder because when other people are depending on you, you have to do whatever you can to make sure they're okay. It was also the first time since Jake was born that his dad actually acknowledged the fact that Sam might actually be capable of raising a kid.

And it was all stuff Sam already knew, but hearing somebody else say it felt like just the right amount of tough love that he needed to actually get out of bed and go get his son and finally face the fact that this was their life now and no amount of moping or self-pity was going to change any of it. They had to figure out what to do and how to do it and make things as good as they could because there was no other choice. So it actually turned out to be one of the most effective conversations of his whole life.

And now Jake's officially a teenager, and he's actually turned out pretty damn good so far. Yeah, he definitely has his moments, but he's a kid. And kids have moments. But he's a good kid for the most part, even if the teenage attitude is something less than amazing. But he's thirteen, which means they've survived thirteen years and made it through pretty okay for the most part. Thirteen years ago, Sam couldn't even imagine this far in the future, and there were lots of times when he wasn't even sure they would make it one day to the next. But here they are. Thirteen years. Still okay, better than ever. He doesn't worry so much about making it day to day anymore.

So he counts that as a success.

But while his oldest kid is downstairs being a teenager, his youngest is currently face down on the rug with her butt up in the air like she's trying to go somewhere. Quinn's watching that, too, and shakes her head. "She's going to crawl soon. I don't want her to."

"Why not?"

"Because she'll start crawling, and then she'll start walking, and then that'll be it. And we don't have anymore." She sounds legitimately sad about that, like it's just hitting her that this is their last baby, and this is the last time they get to do all this stuff.

He's bummed about it, too, but he tries to make Quinn feel better. "But just think, once she starts walking, you can start teaching her how to dance. And then we can take her to ballet class."

She smiles at that. "You want her to do ballet?"

"Well, I _want _her to play baseball… But I guess she can do both."

Quinn crawls over to where Riley now has the ear of a stuffed rabbit in her mouth and picks her up. The rabbit falls to the floor while Quinn sets Riley up in a standing position and lets her bounce there. "Do you want to be a ballerina?" Riley just smiles and drools a little bit. "Look how green her eyes are turning."

Sam goes over to sit with them and takes a look. Her eyes are definitely changing colors, and they're actually getting pretty bright. "Now she just needs to grow some hair."

"Think of how cute she's gonna be in a pink tutu and ballet slippers." He can totally tell that Quinn's actually imagining this, and he laughs a little bit and just nods.

"Yeah, pretty cute." He reaches out to take Riley instead and holds her up to his shoulder. It takes less than three seconds for her to find the collar of his shirt and start sucking on it.

Okay, so maybe cute is an understatement.

…

Jake's scared.

That's not surprising, given the fact that the only surgery he's ever had was when he was six months old, so obviously he doesn't remember that. That wasn't major surgery, either- it was actually just reconstructive to fix some pretty bad scarring on his face after all the stitches came out. This isn't super major, either, but it does involve actually going inside a part of his body and fixing something internal, so it's not really shocking that Jake's a little nervous.

They have to be at the hospital at 5:30, so Sam takes Jake, while Quinn stays home and gets the kids ready for his parents. She took the day off, too, so she's going to take the kids to his mom and dad's and then come to the hospital after. So he's on his own with Jake who's actually very awake, considering the sun's not even up yet. They're in a prep room, but so far all that's happened has been a nurse coming in to take blood pressure and bringing a hospital gown to change into. Other than that, they haven't done much of anything but sit around and watch ESPN highlights from the night before.

But eventually, they start talking, and Sam asks him about his party, which was just two nights ago, and if he had fun and everything. They've talked about it just kind of briefly, but he doesn't have any details or anything. He's not sure he'll get them now, either, but apparently they have nothing else to do right now, so it might be the best chance.

Jake tells him it was really fun and his best party ever, so it was obviously a success, despite the fact that there weren't a ton of people there. Jake says that everybody had fun and that Anna even said his house was the best house because he has the cool parents.

"Really?" Sam likes the sound of that. "We're the cool parents?"

Jake kind of makes a face like he can think of counter-arguments, but then he just shrugs. And says maybe a little. And then he says Anna's dad is a foot doctor like that lowers the bar on her definition of cool by a lot or something.

Then Jake's phone starts buzzing from inside his bag, and when Sam points this out, Jake practically falls out the bed trying to reach for it. He answers whoever's texting him, and then Sam asks who it is because it's seriously like six o'clock in the morning. 6:17 to be exact.

It's Kaley.

So. Kaley is texting his son at 6:17 AM on Christmas break when she should really, most definitely still be asleep. Sam just raises an eyebrow, and Jake just shrugs like it's not a big deal and says she just wants to know if he's in surgery yet.

"So she woke up at six o'clock to text you?"

Jake shrugs again, and Sam can totally tell he's trying really hard to keep the nonchalance shit up but that he obviously knows it's not exactly normal. And whatever, there's nothing else to do, and if there's a girl who's obviously that concerned with his son that she'll wake herself up before the sun to talk to him, then Sam's going to do some prying. He should be able to get away with it, being the cool dad and all that.

"Did you kiss her yet?"

Jake kind of glares for a second and then _shrugs _again.

"So you did?"

Another shrug. And then finally a nod.

So, okay. Wow. On one hand, he kind of knew it already. On the other hand, he wasn't really expecting Jake to admit it, and he definitely wasn't expecting it to feel as weird when he _did. _Because it's not like he's crazy and thinks, you know, seventh graders don't make out with each other or whatever, but damn. It kind of hits harder than he thought it would.

"Since when?"

Jake shrugs again because apparently that's his _favorite _answer to like every single question. But then he answers and says like since around Halloween. So, okay. That's a lot longer ago than Sam expected, which means his son and his girlfriend have somehow been finding time and places to kiss each other for two months now. And he had no idea.

But whatever. He's not going to make a big deal about it because the last thing he needs is Jake getting all pissed off and angsty when he's already nervous about going into surgery. So he just nods like it's no big deal, and then Jake says not to tell Quinn because she'll be crazy.

And of course he's going to tell Quinn, but Jake doesn't need to know that.

More people start coming in and out to do actual prep work. They get an IV started, and whatever's in it actually calms Jake down a lot, and he stops seeming so anxious. The anesthesiologist comes in and talks to him, and Sam does his best to translate what's going on so that Jake doesn't feel totally out of the loop or whatever. And then the surgeon comes in and really breaks down what's going to happen and asks if they've got any questions or anything, and Sam glances at the clock and sees that they've been here for almost two hours already.

Quinn shows up right before they take him back, and she gets there just in time to look thoroughly nervous and make an appropriate fuss over telling Jake everything's going to be fine, and it'll all be over before he even knows it happened. And that's cool or whatever, but Jake's basically totally chill right now thanks to whatever's pumping through that IV. But he doesn't complain when she hugs him or when Sam does, and they get escorted back to the waiting room while Jake gets taken back to the OR.

"Guess what," Quinn looks almost exhausted when she falls into one of the plastic chairs in the waiting room. "Hunter had no accidents all night, and when he woke up, the first thing he said was that he needed to potty."

"Really?"

She nods and then smiles. "So hopefully we're almost done with him!" That'll be nice. Having two kids in diapers is a lot harder than having one, so if they can get Hunter down, Riley should be a cake walk or something.

"Oh, you guess what," he flips it on her, and she just looks at him. "Jake's been kissing Kaley for two months now."

"What?" She looks almost terrified or something. "He told you that?"

Sam nods. "Yeah, but you can't say anything. He doesn't want anyone to know." He doesn't point out that Jake specifically said she'd "be crazy."

"How did we not know about this?"

"I don't know. I can't believe he actually told me."

"Was he already drugged up?"

Sam laughs and shakes his head. "No, not when he told me that."

"Well, that's good then. That he feels comfortable or whatever." She doesn't look like _she _feels comfortable at all.

But Sam nods. And then, "Oh, hey. Did you know we're the cool parents?"

"Well, duh."

"Anna told Jake that. That we have the best house. Because we're the cool parents."

"We're also the hottest."

"Yeah, no shit." He's not too happy about that, either, considering the fact that he's definitely noticed the way some of Jake's friends have started to perv on Quinn. He's not sure if she realizes it or not, but it's pretty obvious. He doesn't want to think about what's going on in their perverted little middle school heads.

Actually, he _knows _what's going on in there, and he doesn't so much appreciate it.

…

Surgery goes well, and everything seems fine. It's too early to tell how much actual progress was made with the nerve endings, but hopefully there's at least some improvement. At least enough so that he's got some kind of feeling back.

They only have to stay in the hospital overnight, just for observation, and when they get home, things pretty much go straight into full-swing Christmas prep. They've pushed a lot of stuff off til the very last second, but now there's no more time, so they basically _have _to get everything done. They've got a ton of last-minute shopping to do and all kinds of "traditions" that they're trying to make for the kids that have to literally be shoved into two days. So that's baking and ornament making and a bunch of other stuff that Ethan and Hunter love and seem really into. Jake even helps a little bit, but he's kind of got an excuse to ditch a lot of it because he's supposed to be resting as much as possible til his post-op checkup.

Quinn goes to work on Christmas Eve to finish up some end of the year stuff, and Sam stays home with the kids and ends up spending two full hours reading different Christmas books that the kids hand to him. He's not really sure where they _got _this many holiday books, but okay. Then Ethan announces that he's going to sing a song he learned in school, so they have to sit there while he sings Jingle Bells like, no lie, ten times. But it's cute, so it's okay.

And when Quinn gets home, she walks in to find him helping the little kids "exercise," which really means that _he's _doing pushups while they both ride on his back and laugh. And actually, it's not a bad trick because it's actually good for his workout, and the kids think it's hilarious. Sometimes he also bench presses them at the same time, but that freaks Quinn out, so he mostly just does it when she's not around.

Hunter jumps off as soon as Quinn walks in, though, and he runs up to her and says, "Santa Claus is coming!" in the clearest, most excited voice Sam's ever heard come out of him.

"I know!" She picks him up and kisses him, and Hunter just giggles because obviously the prospect of Santa puts him in an exceptionally good mood or something. "Are you excited for him to come?"

Hunter nods happily, and Ethan, not to be left out, runs over and says, "I'm excited, too!" just to make sure that Quinn doesn't somehow forget he exists or something.

Sam's kind of less-than-excited because Santa Claus coming to visit means he's going to be up all night putting toys together, but it'll be worth it.

…

They go to his parents' house for Christmas Eve dinner just like they always do, and that's one of the best parts of the whole holiday because his mom makes all kinds of stuff specifically for Christmas, and it kind of makes _him _feel like a kid again because she's been making this stuff for literally his whole life.

It's weird, though, because Stacy isn't here, and this is the first time since she was born that he hasn't seen her on Christmas Eve. Now that she's married, though, she's apparently got to split time between her own family and Tyler's, and since Tyler's family is in Illinois, they're not going to make it to both. It sucks, and Sam can tell his mom's bummed about it, but she's not letting on because she's apparently decided to try her best to be supportive and to not be so upset by the fact that Stacy's grown up and married all of a sudden.

Stevie's there, though, and even though things have obviously cooled off some since Thanksgiving, it's still a little tense. Sam can tell he's not too thrilled to be there, and he's basically just barely speaking to their dad. He's spending most of his time in his old room with Jake playing old-school Xbox games. And that's fine because it's keeping Jake occupied and giving him less time to get bored and antsy. Ethan and Hunter are both running like a million miles a minute, though, and Sam's kind of surprised that his dad isn't more annoyed than he is. He hasn't told them to quiet down even once, and he actually agrees to be the bridge when Ethan decides they're going to be a train.

He hangs out in the kitchen with his mom and Quinn and Riley for a little while, but then he decides to go check out what Jake and Stevie are doing because he's pretty sure Riley's due for a poop any second now, and he's kind of purposely ducking out so that he doesn't have to change it. He finds them playing some CoD circa 2010, and he grabs the controller from Jake and squeezes into a spot on the bed so that he can school his little brother some.

"I can't believe this even still works." He takes aim and totally obliterates a dude in like .5 seconds.

Stevie answers without looking over and breaking his concentration. "I took care of my stuff. It's like new."

Sam snorts because okay. Stevie was the most destructive kid Sam's ever seen in his life, and that includes Ethan. "Yeah. Well, I'm pretty sure this is mine anyway."

Stevie just shrugs. "Yeah, well, you left. So finders keepers."

"And I can still kick your ass at this. You play worse now than you did when you were ten."

But Stevie laughs and shakes his head. "I can't believe you're trying to shit talk me in front of your kid."

"I'm not. I'm just pointing out the obvious."

It doesn't matter anyway because Jake stands up and announces that he's going to pee because the graphics on this game suck and it's boring. Or at least that's what Sam thinks he says. He's too busy dodging bullets to actually look up with full attention. They only play for a couple of minutes after he leaves, though, before Stevie drops the controller and quits.

"Giving up because you suck so bad?"

"Nah. Did you know Jake's been making out with some chick?"

Sam stops, too, and looks over. "He told you that?"

"Yeah."

"He told me, too."

And Stevie just kind of smiles. "Well, look at that. Y'all with your nice little open relationship."

"Did he tell you that it's been going on since Halloween?"

"Yeah."

"So how did I miss that?"

"Mom and Dad didn't know Stacy was _married _for two months. Obviously he takes after her." That doesn't make Sam feel much better, but his brother seems oblivious. "Is she hot?"

And Sam looks at him like he's crazy. "Umm… She's thirteen."

And Stevie just looks back like he doesn't realize what's wrong with that question.

"Dude." Sam shakes his head.

"Jake said she's hot."

"He said she's _hot_?"

"I said, _is she hot? _And he said yeah."

Sam just lets out a breath because… "Jesus Christ."

"Yeah, man. It's his birthday and everything."

And then Sam laughs because his brother is so dumb and somehow amusing at the same time. He's always been that kind of annoying that you can't help but laugh at.

And apparently some things don't change.

…

He literally doesn't even know why he bothered going to sleep.

It's totally still dark in his room when he hears the door slam open and then feels the weight of the bed change when somebody obviously jumps onto it. He hears a whole bunch of, "_Momma, Daddy! Momma, Daddy! Wake up, wake up!" _before he manages to get his eyes open.

And there's all three of his boys, including the oldest one who basically won't get up for _anything _except Christmas. Quinn is the world's heaviest sleeper and somehow manages to sleep through it until Hunter actually sits on her stomach and starts pinching her face. Sam's half-asleep, but he tries to push Hunter's hand away before he ends up getting slapped or thrown to the floor or something. Quinn wakes up, though, and asks what time it is without opening her eyes.

"5:14…"

She groans, and that's kind of his sentiments exactly. They were up til three getting the presents out and getting everything set up and put together. So he doesn't really blame her for being less than eager to wake up, but it's not like they didn't know this was gonna happen. Kids love Christmas. Like a lot. It's kind of a miracle that they even went to sleep last night.

But really, seeing how excited the kids are kind of makes Sam more excited, too, so he sits up, grabs Hunter, and then tucks him in beside Quinn. "You guys wait here while Momma wakes up, and I'm gonna go get Riley."

He yawns when he gets up and wonders how cranky his baby's going to be when she gets woken up two hours ahead of schedule. It's not like she's going to know what's going on anyway, but they can't just let her sleep through her very first Christmas morning ever. She's got her own pile of presents, and even if she won't care one way or another about anything besides putting the ribbon in her mouth, she at least needs to be there.

He's right that she's cranky, and she doesn't want to wake up any more than her mommy does. She starts crying almost immediately, so he changes her diaper and gives her a bottle to kind of calm her down a little bit. It's probably going to put her right back to sleep, so he only gives her a couple of ounces and then tickles her for a few minutes until she starts laughing and seems to wake up some.

When he gets back to his own room, Quinn's awake and brushing her teeth. The kids are getting more and more antsy by the second, and Ethan screams toward the bathroom, "Sissy's awake, let's go!" which doesn't actually make Quinn hurry at all.

But eventually, she puts the kids out of their misery and announces that they can finally go to the living room. It's like a mad dash after that, and he's surprised nobody gets knocked down and trampled. Quinn kind of laughs when they take off running, but Sam just tells her to hurry up so they can see.

Like seriously, he's not sure there's a single better feeling in the world than watching kids on Christmas morning. They're so excited, and they instinctively know exactly which pile of gifts belongs to them, so they all run straight for their own presents. There's a whole bunch of excited yelping and talking, and Hunter actually jumps up and down when he sees the new tricycle he's been begging for every single time they go in a store. Sam sits down in front of Riley's pile, and starts showing her some of her own toys. He's right that the only thing she cares about is seeing what parts of the boxes and ribbons can fit in her mouth, so he lets her play there under the tree while he goes over to help the other kids who are simultaneously all trying to open every single thing they got.

Quinn plays with Riley and takes pictures while the boys all show off all their new stuff. Everybody's wide-awake now, and it's just a really good feeling. He loves this. He loves all these people, and this is the kind of morning that makes everything else in the world worth it. Because he honestly can't think of anywhere else in the world he'd rather be than right here on his living room floor with his family on Christmas morning. And that doesn't change when the first inevitable fight breaks out, and Ethan and Hunter start arguing over whether or not Hunter touched Ethan's new Lego pirate set. It's just normal, and it's just his life. And really, no matter what, he just loves it.

Even with dirty diapers and screaming kids and too many bills and sticky _everything, _it still feels kind of like paradise.

…

…

…

A/N: So… That's the end! Thanks to everyone who stuck with the story and especially to everyone who has reviewed. You guys are amazing, and I had so much fun writing this!


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